being jennifer garrett
Every day an adventure in mediocrity
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Saturday, May 3    

Shop 'til you drop
I don't know what it is, but there is something so satisfying about shopping -- buying good stuff, spending money you don't have -- it adds up to a fun afternoon. Jen and I bought a new TV for the living room; we actually needed it because the old one a) was a Daewoo; and b) was inhabited by spirits that decided that we didn't really need to watch Dawson's Creek just because it was on.

We also bought lawn furniture for our deck. I can't wait. Every nice day from now on, if you need me, you can find me out back in the chaise lounge, reading a book and sipping a 'rita.

  posted @ 9:22 PM |

Friday, May 2    

The world definitely ain't right today
Am I really the only person who is disgusted by young girls in highly sexualized clothes? This model is 12. Twelve. I still played with Barbies when I was 12.

Our society is going to hell in a handbasket. First, they make cars in taupe, and now pre-adolescents are selling sex under the guise of fashion.

I'm going home.

Via Ms. Musings

  posted @ 8:40 AM |


Do like I told you, stay away from me
I don't know what is wrong with the world today, but every jerk-off in a taupe Nissan or Toyota decided to cut me off this morning. I had to put in the Godsmack and play it really loudly (you know you've reached maximum sound density when you can feel the reverb in your fillings). And I don't know why it made me more angry that their cars were taupe, for chrissakes, but it did.

If you live in the area, I don't recommend doing 85 mph down Rt. 9 in Wellesley, but it sure as hell felt good as soon as I found an open stretch of road.

  posted @ 8:25 AM |

Thursday, May 1    

No additives or preservatives
I did it: I upgraded my Angelfire account.

I give you: being jennifer garrett, now 100% ad-free.

If you still see ads, let me know so I can bitch out Angelfire.

  posted @ 4:10 PM |


She's back
The WNBA really isn't that different from the NBA: Cynthia Cooper, arguably one of the best players ever, is coming out of retirement and returning to the Houston Comets. Now if MJ had made a return to the Bulls, that would have been cool.

The press is giving this play as if her return will assure the Comets a return to league champions. I'm not so sure, but the Comets did win four straight titles with the 1-2-3 punch of Swoopes, Cooper, and Thompson. Watch out, Sparks.

  posted @ 11:22 AM |

Wednesday, April 30    

When god made me born a Yankee, he was teasing
Jen, Pam, and I went to Magnolia's in Cambridge tonight for a little Southern comfort food in celebration of Pam's birthday. It was amazing. First, I didn't know you could fry an avocado. Yes, we had fried avocado with cheese as an appetizer. Then I had some really good barbeque chicken. There may have been an incident. I'm fine now. I never need to eat again, however.

In addition to yummy Southern cuisine with my friends, I also learned how to pronounce andouille (I pronounced it then ate it!) and maquechoux (okay, picture this: Jen says, "Mak-shoe," and I reply, "Bless you." Jen: "It was on your blog!" Me: "It was?" Jen: "Oh, yeah ... if you don't know how to pronounce it you have no idea what I'm talking about.")

Other topics discussed: threesome, what point does it become an orgy? Pam and I in unison: "Five."

  posted @ 10:20 PM |


Orient Yourself
Who hasn't felt like they wanted a gay boyfriend? (It's a long download, but so worth the wait.)

I'm working on an alternate version, Gay Girlfriend. Because what guy doesn't want a girl who will watch sports and never talk about her feelings?

Wow. That is so me. Anyone wanna catch the game?

  posted @ 3:20 PM |


Underachievers Anonymous
Today is the 2003 Ruhlman Conference here at Wellesley. Classes are cancelled so students can present various projects they have worked on -- theses, art exhibits, performances, etc. -- and everyone can pause and go and listen/watch.

Which means two things: Free lunch, and Jen feels like a total underachieving idiot. It's amazing how an 18-year-old presenting a paper on Chaucer or what have you can make you realize that you've never actually had a decent thought in your life.

  posted @ 9:23 AM |

Tuesday, April 29    

To Do List
1. Learn how to do this.
2. Buy this.
3. Drive off into the sunset.

  posted @ 8:39 AM |


Would that be a salt marsh?
A marsh fire swept through Mentor, Ohio. I didn't know that such a thing as a marsh fire even existed. Brush fire, sure -- it's dry, fire, no problem. Marshes seem kind of ... wet for fires, don't they?

I think the fire chief explained it best when he said of Mentor, "It's a beautiful place to live until it's on fire."

Which is why I no longer live in Ohio. If it's not beautiful when it's on fire, what's the point?

  posted @ 1:00 AM |

Monday, April 28    

I'm frightened
I haven't blogged all day. There's this big hole in my life. I keep asking myself, "Why haven't I blogged? What's wrong? Has the bubble burst? Am I no longer enamored of the blog? Where will I go from here?"

Straight to Blogger to blog about why I haven't blogged.

  posted @ 8:37 PM |

Sunday, April 27    

Confidence in confidence alone
I like Ed Burns. I realized the other day that I like him in much the same way I like Ben Affleck: They both have a hometown, boy-next-door "whatever" attitude that I just find immensely appealing. They both can say "fuck you" with authority. I find this trait important, what can I say? My mother always said I had a mouth like a trucker. The point being, I like Ed Burns, so I went to see his latest flick, Confidence.

It had some ... flaws. First, it tried to be Ocean's Eleven and without George Clooney, Brad Pitt, and Steven Soderbergh, forget about it. Second, I don't like Rachel Weisz. She is suddenly ubiquitous and I can't figure out why. Third, the plot tried to con you and failed.

That said, I still like Ed Burns. And he has good hair in the movie, which he didn't in his earlier, better movies, like The Brothers McMullen.

  posted @ 8:12 PM |

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