Springtime
Mood:  happy
Now Playing: Funkstar De Luxe vs. Bob Marley - Sun is shining
Topic: Everyday life
This has been a very productive day.
Got on the bus and sat there for the three hours it takes to get to college. It didn't feel like that long though, since I met an old friend who apparently is also going to college. Sat down on the hard wood bench in long hallway, and waisted some time. Saw a real cutie pie, too bad he walked like he had to "powder his nose". Looked at the old people walking by. Looked at the kids walking by. There really aren't any people my age there! And NO ONE speaks with the accent that people have around here, they all sound like they're born and raised in Stockholm.
Time for class. Fortunately, no one else seemed to have read the text for today either. We got the assignment sheets for the final essay, and let me put it this way, if I get a passing grade on that essay, I'm sure to get the Nobel prize. This is supposed to be at the same level as the other classes I've had, but it's not. It's almost as advanced as a frigging Ph.D. You have to write 10-12 pages!! It's more than twice what I've ever written before! And we get graded on silly things like grammar and punctuation. Just add some slugs, and you have Fear Factor for dummies.
But for some reason, I realized on the bus that I'm actually looking forward to flunking this class. I really want to study. There's a scary thought!
The professors are good, and they make you less intimidated with the whole thing by insisting on speaking Swenglish the entire time :)
The worst part is probably the Ventilation we're supposed to have at the end of the course. That's when we're supposed to criticize the other students' essays... We did have a similar thing in Stockholm, but not nearly as advanced.
Any way, finished class and had to RUN to catch the damned bus. Got there at the same time as the bus and sat there for an hour, reading, listening to some Tiga and Luda, enjoying the bluest of skies. Without even getting car sick! Had some food at a Chinese place and went to the gym. I managed to do everything that I had planned, even though it felt three times heavier than usual.
Later on, I went swimming but they must have turned off the heat in the pool. It might just as well have been ice...

Christmas every day?
Mood:  lucky
Now Playing: Puff Daddy - Mo money...
Topic: Everyday life
I don't know what I've done to deserve the things I get. For some reason, people keep giving me gifts, things and buying me lunch and all that...just because. Of course I'm grateful but sometimes I just don't know how to repay them for everything... Your time is enough, it's a gift in itself.

Thanks everyone! Love ya! ...and not just because you give me things... ;)

Time for school?
Mood:  hug me
Now Playing: Dust flying around in my head
Topic: Everyday life
I finally, today, found that damned booklist. In the wrong room of that damned Fronter-thing. Too bad I have no chance of getting that book, AND reading it by tomorrow. One part of me just wants to give it up, and just send the teacher an e-mail that reads "I'm too dumb for this shit. Goodbye." but then some part of me do want to go on, and prove to myself that I can do it, and I will do it. It seems like that first part is winning. I haven't even opened the book, even though I've had it on my bed stand for two weeks now.

Baptism
Mood:  rushed
Topic: Everyday life
An old friend of mine is having a baptism for her daughter. I heard people talking about it, but since I didn't hear anything I just assumed I wasn't invited, but appearently I was. And of course it's on the same day that I'm going away. Sigh. I really want to go to the baptism, but if I go I'll have to stay home for the rest of the week, because I won't afford a new ticket, so now I don't know what the **** to do... I know how I'd feel if it was the other way around, I'd want me...eh...to come... You know what I mean ;)

School reunion
Mood:  hungry
Now Playing: Alice Cooper - School's Out
Topic: Everyday life
Apparently we're going to have a school reunion, ten years since we finished compulsory school. And apperently I'm going. I guess it could be fun, it's just that there's going to be more people that I don't want to meet than people that I actually want to meet. I guess I'll just have to do a "Romy and Michelle" and tell everyone that I invented Post-its.
But with my luck I'll probably be the Janeane Garofalo of the party.

Where to go?
Mood:  sad
Now Playing: Take me home country roads.
Topic: Bad News
So here it is. The day I have dreaded for almost a year now. The day he's finally moving out. For real. Leaving me homeless and wireless. This place has been a part of my life for six years now, in one way or another. It's kind of sad.
Where will this leave me? Alone and confused maybe. Now I'll have no one and no where to go. It's always better to be the one leaving, not the one being left behind.
There's been a lot of changes on my behalf lately. For the first time...ever, nothing to do. Quit my job a couple of months ago.
Nowhere to go. Have been staying with friends for years now.
No cat to play with. Somehow they became my friends and allies. My comforters. My safety blankets.
No friends. They're all busy with their own lives and families, and the ones who aren't are moving away.

That's probably why I have such a hard time leaving someone I don't really get along with. Even if we disagree most of the time, at least I'm getting noticed. I get recognized, and therefor I am...or something like that :)

Right now I've kind of hung up my life on a bunch of if and what's, and in particular one person. But I know that I can't do that. I can't expect her to fix my life for me. I have to do that myself. It's only I who can be in charge of my own life, or at least so I'd like to think...

Virus?
Mood:  irritated
Now Playing: Teddybears STHLM - Automatic Lover
Topic: Bad News
I don't know if it's me who's carrying some kind of electronic virus on me, or what the deal is... For some reason everything seems to stop working when I'm around. The mobile, my tv, the computer *sigh* I guess it's time to buy a new...everything...

Speechless
Mood:  don't ask
Now Playing: System of a Down - Lonely Day
Topic: Everyday life
This has probably been the worse day of my life. It started off with me worring my pretty little head off. "What kind of clothes should I wear?? What if I don't look like everyone else? I know I'm gonna look different!! Everyone's gonna hate me! I won't be able to follow in class! I knew it!! I might aswell just stay at home!!"
I finally went to the bus, and by the first bus change the sun came out, and with loud housemusic coming out of my ears I managed to calm down. The rest of the trip there went well, and I got the 45 minutes early. Phoned a friend and bugged her for the most of the time before class started.
Got there and was almost immediately faced with a question "Did you do the assignment for today?" What bloody assignment?? And it also turned out that I'd only got half the book list. Great! The teachers seemed pretty ok though... At least that's something...
The really big problem, though, occured after class, when I had to try to find the damn bus stop. It took me about forty minutes or so, and by then the bus had left a looong time ago, so I decided to walk down town while I waited for the next bus. I shouldn't have. I really shouldn't have. The ten minute walk took me about forty minutes and two emergency phones calls. Oh, and I also ruined my shoes completely, so yours truely is presently shoeless.
I finally managed to get out of there, and went to the next town where I met up with some friends and had lunch. For a moment there I relaxed, and enjoyed the sunshine, company, and ice cream (Ahlgren bilar, a bit too sweet for me, but ok). I shouldn't have. Of course I had, while waiting for the train, to blurt out that I was travelling on an invalid bus pass, and surely enough, and turned around just to face two grinning men dressed in clothes with the train company logo. So there's was nothing to do, but to walk out of there and find another mean of transportation.

Happy Easter
Mood:  energetic
Topic: Good News
The highlight of the day was the Easter card I got from one of my friends, and her family. I didn't find it until late that night, and I couldn't help smiling.

Sweet...
Mood:  happy
Topic: Good News
My cousin's wife rang me yesterday, just to tell me that everything went ok with the birth and all. She's so sweet! :)