The Florencia Lozano Homepage - Fan Fiction
| NEVER AGAIN BY TIMA |
CHAPTER 22 |
NEVER AGAIN
chapter 22:
Tea: This isn't the time, nor the place, to discuss this.
Todd: Come back to the hotel with me.
Tea: Why are you suddenly so desperate to be with me? Give me an honest answer.
Todd: I don't know. That's the truth. As soon as I saw you again...
Tea: You came to me, remember? Why?
Todd: I answered that question back then.
Tea: Not to my satisfaction.
Todd: I'll satisfy you, if you shut up and go back to the hotel with me.
Tea: I don't want to always be the person you settle for while you're on the rebound.
Todd: What rebound?
Tea: Don't deny it.
Todd: I only came back here to get my kids back.
Tea: I don't believe that.
Todd: Okay, I admit it. There was another reason I left you on that island. Is that what you want to hear?
Tea: I want you to be honest with me, and with yourself.
Todd: I wanted you to pay for what you did to me.
Tea: Me?
Todd: You bailed on me. You suckered me into thinking you gave a damn about me, you got me to open up to you, do all that spilling my guts junk. You let me fuck you. You pretended you liked it. Then, you split on me while I was asleep. While I was asleep! You know how much I hate sleeping. You knew what it would do to me knowing that I lost you because I was weak and fell asleep.
Tea: You lost me because I was scared of how you would respond to the new level of intimacy we had shared.
Todd: I wasn't going to hurt you.
Tea: Being stranded on a deserted island hurt me. Being abandoned by you hurt me.
Todd: It was supposed to hurt you. You ripped my guts out. I wanted you to feel lousy, too.
Tea: You're lying. I know you are. I woke up and found you looking at Blair's picture.
Todd: That's what I wanted you to find. I've watched you sleep enough times to know what it's like right before you wake up. I wanted you to see that. I wanted to hurt you.
Tea: You abandoned me because I abandoned you? You are aware that was partly a response to your having abandoned me in the past, aren't you?
Todd: You split on me first.
Tea: No, you did.
Todd: No way!
Tea: You pushed me away at every opportunity, from the first day of our business marriage.
Todd: Pushing someone away and bailing on someone are two different things.
Tea: Do you remember what you were like after you convinced me to leave Llanview with you?
Todd: I was handsome, charming and tons of fun to be around.
Tea: You were handsome, I'll give you that.
Todd: We did have some fun.
Tea: There were moments. There were also moments of incredible loneliness.
Todd: We were together all the time.
Tea: But, there were times you refused to speak to me. The first time we kissed again, you wouldn't speak to me for the rest of the day.
Todd: I had a sore throat.
Tea: You were scared. So was I. I wanted to deal with our fears together. You needed to shut me out.
Todd: If you knew I needed that, why'd you get so pissed?
Tea: Because, it hurt me. Do you understand that?
Todd: No.
Tea: Every step we took towards a more intimate relationship was followed immediately by you distancing yourself from me. If I had stayed after we made love, what would have happened?
Todd: We would have fucked again...eventually.
Tea: How many days of silence would have preceded our next love-making session? Or, would it have been weeks? Years?
Todd: I get it. You thought I would bail on you so you beat me to it.
Tea: Is that what would have happened?
Todd: Probably...maybe...I don't know. I never got the chance to find out.
Tea: You abandoned me on our second wedding night, when I needed you.
Todd: You kicked me out of your life, remember?
Tea: That was before I almost died in that fire.
Todd: I didn't know your eating all that smoke changed anything. You have to fill me in on this junk. I don't have a clue with you, and you know it.
Tea: I think you have known what you were doing every step of the way on this painful journey we've been on.
Todd: You're the one who wanted this whole journey through hell thing. I just wanted you to stay married to me.
Tea: A marriage without love, communication, trust, and everything else we lacked, is not a real marriage.
Todd: We communicated.
Tea: Grunting is not communication.
Todd: You never stopped yacking at me. If that's not communication, what is?
Tea: That was one-sided. I talked, you left the room.
Todd: Not always.
Tea: Right! Sometimes you stayed in the same room. You just tuned me out.
Todd: That's marriage!
Tea: That's lonely.
Todd: I don't get you, Delgado. Even when I give you what you say you want, you're still not happy.
Tea: Abandoning me on a deserted island so you could return to your wife was not designed to make me happy.
Todd: I just explained that to you. That was all your fault!
Tea: That was your choice, not mine.
Todd: You're not going to let it go, are you?
Tea: Why should I?
Todd: Because, I sort of feel bad about it now.
Tea: Sort of?
Todd: Okay! I feel lousy about it. I won't abandon you on islands anymore. What more do you want from me?
Tea: Genuine affection.
Todd: What does that mean?
Tea: Figure it out for yourself.
Todd: Stop playing games with me. Just tell me what you want.
Tea: I want you to give me back the time I lost while I was on that island. I want you to give us back the time we lost with each other every time one of your jackass moves ended our relationship.
Todd: What about your jackass moves?
Tea: I did what I needed to do.
Todd: So did I. I needed to get custody of my kids. I knew you'd push me to waste time doing it legally. I left you on that island to pay you back for what you did to me, and to give myself time to get my kids first, then we all could have been a family.
Tea: How long were you planning to leave me there?
Todd: Not long. Besides, you had Mr. I-Can't-Keep-My-Shirt-On with you. I knew you'd survive.
Tea: I wish I had been as sure as you were. I was terrified that I'd never get off that island. Each day we weren't rescued was another day I feared you were lost to the sea.
Todd: If I can survive the sharks in Llanview, I can survive the sharks in the ocean.
Tea: It wasn't a joke to me. I was scared that something had happened to you.
Todd: Maybe I wanted you to be scared. Maybe I wanted you to be so scared, when you saw me again, you wouldn't put me through this hell, talking about our relationship.
Tea: We have to talk about it, if you want it to continue, in whatever form we choose it to take.
Todd: I choose it to take us somewhere there's a huge bed, unless you want to do it out here on the street against a parked car.
Tea: I don't want to do it at all. I'm not in the mood to reward you right now.
Todd: What if I swear I won't get anything out of it? I'll just make you feel really good so you'll forget how much you hate my guts.
Tea: You and I both know how it would end if we started that again.
Todd: You'd split on me after I fall asleep.
Tea: You're the one who left me the last time.
Todd: Which means it's your turn.
Tea: What if I didn't leave you? Would you leave me?
Todd: I got my revenge already. I don't have any reason to leave you now.
Tea: What if you get scared?
to be continued...
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