Mission Statement

Mood:  quizzical
Now Playing: Late night radio phone-in

I like smelly food;
I always want a kebab after a night on the piss;
When someone tells me a problem, I try to think of a solution instead of just sympathising;
I'm pushy, and I think what I think is the right thing to think (actually, that's just as female as male, innit?);
I find irrelevant debates good fun;
I assume housewives need to escape from their lives;
Find it quite awkward to talk about girly emotional stuff;
I shudder at the pity-me culture that allows people to do what the hell they like (one person I know shagged around her fiance, married him anyway, wouldn't take her meds, spent 20 hours a day online, became totally messed in the head, lived a totally self-centred self-obsessed life whilst ignoring husband, then shagged around some more. When he finally wised up and dumped her, it was all testament to how Truly Brave A Poppet She Is. Made me want to puke.)
(Yep, there'll be no more Pity Me posts on this, Your Daily Charlatan's Blog. Thank fuck for that.)
I really don't care what other people think (PMT apart, though);
No matter how voyeuristic anyone reading this feels, I'm never going to blog the stuff that's really important;
I pick the scabs on my scalp;
There's fifty-seven varieties of ageing curry sauce in my fridge. And an onion;
I love driving, and when you're in my car, then everyone behind is a wanker, and everyone in front is a fool;
I judge people on how they look. Always;
Doing the washing seems unnecessary until the basket is more than full:
Actually, when I lived in Balham, I used to chuck my dirty washing in the spare room and buy more clothes rather than go to the launderette down the street. Eventually, even when I threw the clothes out, the room smelt too much to let out to any lodger with a human physiognomy, and I moved out, leaving the rest of the dirty laundry where it was;
I make the first move (well, unless I really really fancy someone, then I'll be all girly and terrified);
I don't want kids or a marriage or a house with a garden - a brilliant record collection is far superior;
Speaking of which, my record collection is sorted by musical style and era. I look forward to the day when I'm so bored I sort by musical influence;
I own three hi-fis, four walkmans, three TV sets, two videos, one dvd player and three computers. This does not seem an unduly large amount;
I can't be fucked opening letters if they don't look interesting;
I luuuurve a good action movie;
Phone conversations should be short, and communicate information;
I worry what beer is acceptable to drink in the pub;
If I try keeping plants, they die;
Skirts are for girls;
Going out for a few jars means I won't be back till 5am tomorrow;
I can be very very very scary if I want to be. I tend not to want to be, but knowing that makes you more confident than most girls;
I eat my steak blue.

This was originally going to be called 'Things About Me That Seem Blokeish'**, till lemonpillows messaged me on MSN and said it sounded more like a mission statement.

**That probably just reveals how little lesbians actually know about blokes....