The Odd Adventures of Haruka, Michiru, and Setsuna

By Lady Grizabella


The Bark Of A Large Dog?! Setsuna And Haruka Are Celebrities


"Where are yoooooou?" I tunneled through the mountain of sheets towards the sound of giggles. "I can hear you giggling. You're in here somewhere!"

Michiru's laughs came through the dim light of the sheet tent. "Come and find me!"

Yes, we were playing under the sheets. Like a couple of goofy kids, I know, but we took glee in small pleasures.

I reached out and managed to grasp something warm. An ankle. "Gotcha!"

Michiru squealed and scrambled away from me. "Heheheheeeeeeeeeeeeek!" There was a thump from the other side of the bed. I sat up and pulled the covers off my head. "Michi?"

Michiru's giggles were now coming from the floor. "What, did you fall off the bed?" I asked.

"Yep!" She was very giddy. I looked at the empty bottle of champagne that was sitting on the nightstand. We had gotten a little carried away on this particular evening.

I leaned over and grasped her hands, pulling her back up on the bed. "I'm glad we stayed here tonight while Setsuna went to check the Gates. Pluto's Dance Party is great, but so are you."

Michiru giggled and stood up on the bed, curtseying in the little lace nightie she was wearing. "Why, thank you." She hopped up and let herself crash back down to the mattress, causing the bedsprings to complain loudly. "I have an idea! Let's go find some ice cream and make a big mess!"

I tried to extract the last remaining drops of the champagne from the bottle. "How much of this did you drink?" But I wasn't going to complain about ice cream. "Let's go."


Not long after, Michiru and I were seated at the table in negligees and slippers, eagerly scooping ice cream sundaes into our mouths. Michiru leaned over and smeared a glob of chocolate sauce right on my nose. "Hey, what are you trying to do? Get me all excited?" I asked. I tried to touch my tongue to my nose. "Setsuna will be home soon."

"I know she will. But she always goes right to her room and gets on the Internet, so she won't mind if we're playing with ice cream."

"But she will get upset if we don't offer her any. She won't turn down ice cream, either." I got up and pulled out a bowl for when Setsuna arrived.

We had just cleaned ourselves up a bit when we heard the familiar whooshing noise that filled the air right before a Time Portal opened up. "Setsuna must be coming home. I hope she uses the cushions you set up for her, rather than just trying to appear in the kitchen," said Michiru. "Last time, she came falling out of the ceiling like a ton of bricks and broke the table. She got her poor bottom all bruised."

I pretended to be aghast. "And how would you know that?"

Michiru smiled in a shifty way. "Wouldnít you like to know?"

I laughed. Poor Setsuna. She was always the butt of our naughty jokes.

There was a poof and a small portal opened up in the ceiling. Setsunaís Time Staff promptly fell out and smacked me right in the head before the portal closed again. "OWWW!"

Michiru clucked her tongue. "That girl needs to take better care of her things."

I rubbed my head. "What is up with that?"

Michiru picked up the Staff. "Do you hear some kind of rumbling?"

I listened, nursing my aching head. "Yes, I do. It sounds like itís coming from the bedrooms."

A vicious barking suddenly started, causing both of us to jump. "What on earth is that?" Michiru exclaimed.

"A dog, I assume." I gulped. "A really loud dog." The barks were enough to make my eardrums hurt, and the walls had started to shake.

Michiru clutched onto me. "Where is it?"

Suddenly, the most gigantic dog Iíd ever seen burst into the kitchen. Did I mention it was the size of a small elephant and had three heads? "AHHHHHHHHH!!!!" I grabbed for Michiru.

Michi started to scream her head off, both of us gawking at the animal which hardly paused before barreling through into the living room, knocking things off tables. "He-e-e-e-elp!" a jostled something cried from its back.

Michiru gathered her breath again. "Setsuna?!"

We stood in shock as the huge dog went plummeting through our cozy living room and burst right through the front door, knocking it off its hinges, and down the dark street. At least we had wide doorways.

I looked at Michiru, still trying to breathe. "Houston, we have a problem."


"What?" exclaimed the image of Usagi.

I nodded at my communicator. "You heard right. Plutoís loose in the city on the back of an elephant-sized dog with three heads."

"It wasnít quite that big," panted Michiru. She was picking her beloved dolphin figurines off the carpet.

I could practically see the wheels turning in Amiís head as I gazed at her image, which had popped up next to Usagiís. "That dog sounds a lot like the creature the ancient Greeks believe guarded the underworld. Cerberus, he was called."

"And who do we know whoís supposed to have some guardianship of the underworld?" Michiru prompted dryly.

"Hades," Ami immediately answered. "But he was also called Pluto."

I looked at Michiru. "Bingo. Thatís our beast. Letís move."


We ran out of the house into the warm air and looked up and down the street. Everything was quiet in our peaceful little suburb, no sign of anything. "Great! She could be half-way to downtown Tokyo by now and we'll never know!" I exclaimed.

Suddenly my communicator blinked to life and Minako's face appeared. "Oh my God! You'll never believe this, Haruka, but I just saw a HUGE dog run past my house and you'll never guess who was on its back!" She was bouncing around so much her face would hardly stay in the view screen.

Michiru sighed deeply. "I can guess. Pluto was on its back?"

"Yes!" shrieked Minako. "How did you know?"

"Maybe because our house is in shambles, since they just ran though it?" I said. Michiru and I hopped in the car and headed in the direction of downtown Tokyo. "Where were you when this news was new?"

Our little blonde friend blushed. "I was on a date."

I smirked. "Makes sense. Look, contact the other girls and see if you can track her down. Use Ami's computer or something. Michiru and I will be there in a few minutes." I floored the gas pedal.

"Slow down!" hollered Michiru. "It won't do any good if you get us killed!"

"I'm a professional racer!" I countered. "I won't get us killed. I'm very careful."

Michiru held both hands over her hair. "How many crashes have you been in, hmmm?"

I decided to take what the Americans called "The Fifth" on that question.


Soon enough, we were standing around outside Usagi's house, which Ami had determined as the location of the next Pluto and Furry Friend sighting. The dusty gears in Usagi's head were working overtime that night. "Okay, here's the plan! When they run by, Mina ropes the dog with her Love Me Chain. Haruka, you get up there and pull Pluto off before the chain breaks." Huh. Actually, it was a pretty good plan.

"Why me?" I asked.

"You're the biggest."

"But I'm not an amazon!" I countered. "I can't just go scrambling up on some huge mythological dog with three heads!"

"Mamoru can do it!" decided Chibi-Usa, who stood by holding Hotaru's hand. "He's a big, strong, brave man. He's a hero!"

"Hey!" I exclaimed. "I'm a big, strong, brave ma-woman!"

"You just said you didnít want to do it. You're a walking contradiction of yourself," Michiru pointed out.

I sighed. "I know."

"Hey..." Rei finally took a good look at us. "What are you guys wearing?"

I looked down at my clothing, immediately horrified. Michiru squealed and jumped behind me. We were still wearing lacey negligees, and although we were decently covered, it was more of me than I wanted anyone to see. "Okay, so we were ready for bed and we forgot to change."

They gave us skeptical looks. I could practically hear their faith in the Outers dying a slow, horrendous death.

"HE-E-E-ELP!" A voice came crackling through my communicator. The owner of the voice was being bounced so violently she could hardly spit out her cry for assistance. I looked at my communicator and all I could see was masses of dark fur and strands of green hair. "Hang on, honey!" I called into it. "We'll get you down!"

Rei looked exasperated. "How did she even manage to do this!" I gave her a death look, ready to pull my Space Sword. Only Michiru and I were allowed to get exasperated at Setsuna!

Michiru put a hand on my shoulder to silence my growling. She spoke into her communicator: "Sweetheart, how did you get on the dog?"


I believed this and could picture it completely...


Pluto: "I love Time! Now to check the Time Stream. I lo-OOPS! AHHHHH!" *thud*

Cerberus: "WOOF!"

Pluto: "Uh Oh..."


"Ruka? Haruka, wake up."

"Huh?" Michiru had been nudging me after I spaced out. "Oh, yeah. Well, are they almost here?" I pulled the negligee down around my bum a little more. Darn sexy underwear... Mamoru also chose that moment to swoop out of Usagi's house, and I swear he took a good look at me. Laugh it up, Tux Boy. You won't see Haruka like this ever again.

Ami scanned her computer. "They're coming this way. They should be by any minute."

"Poor Setsuna-Mama!" cried Hotaru. "We have to get her down from there! She doesn't even like dogs that much." She wrung her hands.

"Better transform, Minako," advised Makoto, peering over Ami's shoulder. "They're nearly on us."

"Right!" Minako made a traditional Sailor V pose and threw her hand up in the air. "VENUS STAR POWER, MAKEUP!" She twirled around and gestured at us. "Goddess of love and beauty, at your service!"

"Am I that over-dramatic when I transform?" I asked.

"Worse," giggled Michiru.

Ami motioned for us to get out of the road. "Get back. Here they come. Venus, get ready!"

All of us except for Venus and Mamoru, who knew he was going up after Pluto, got out of the way of the street. The pavement started to vibrate as the massive three-headed dog turned down our street and headed straight for us. Pluto was hanging onto the dog's middle neck for dear life, hollering up a storm. I wanted to know how that thing made it through our house without causing monumental damage. At least it was considerate.

Venus raised her hand. "VENUS LOVE ME CHAIN!" Power burst out of her hand and the thin golden chain wrapped around the left neck of the dog just as he was tearing past us. He was jerked and started to growl, pulling at the end of his bonds. "Go, Mamoru! It won't hold long!"

Mamoru was rooted to the spot, staring, his mouth hanging open. I slapped him on the back. "Go on! Get up there and get her!"

"Can't...feel...legs..." he gasped, and before we could do anything, big, brave, strong, manly Tux was passed out on the concrete.

I gave him a kick, ignoring that he would one day be our future king - he was very much just Mamoru now - and slung myself up on the dog's back. "Hold on, baby, I'm coming!"

Pluto let go of the dog's neck and reached for me. "Ruka!"

As I clasped her hand, the Love Me Chain dissolved, and the dog reared forward. Pluto and I fell backwards and I managed to grip onto the dog's fur and get an arm around Pluto as the dog took off at breakneck speed.

"Why didn't Pluto just jump off when she first fell on the dog?" I heard the irritable Rei demand before we were carried off, and Michiru's just as irritated response of: "She's Sailor Pluto, not Hercules!"


Some time later, Pluto and I were riding along at a nice speed. "You know," I said, ignoring the fact I was being jostled around, "this is actually a nice way to tour Tokyo."

Pluto eyed me. "What do you have on?"

I shook my head. "Don't ask."

"How are we going to get off this thing? I should have just jumped."

I rejected that idea. "No, you would have hurt yourself, even as Sailor Pluto. Itís too hard to jump off an object thatís moving this fast. Youíd have no control."

Pluto rose next to me to peer over the dog's middle head. "Haruka, what's that up there?"

I strained my neck. "It looks like some kind of...police road block!" We were barreling towards a whole crowd of people on the sidewalks and police officers with guns. It looked as if the whole town had turned out to see the freakish dog that was loose in their city. Naturally, Tokyo had seen lots of odd things, but this seemed to be the only time the Sailor Soldiers hadn't managed to stop the threat.

People started to exclaim in excitement and awe as Cerberus barreled among them. I started to hear cries of, "A Sailor Soldier! The dark-haired one! Haruka Tenoh, the racer! He's so cute! What's he doing with her? And what's he wearing?"

I would have waved if I hadn't been in lingerie. Now they not only thought I was a guy, but also a cross-dresser. Fabulous. I liked masculine clothing, but I also was glad to be a girl. I didnít want to be known as ĎHaruka Tenoh, that guy who wears negligees.í

I suddenly blinked as a TV camera flashed on, blinding Pluto and me. Great, we'd be making the morning news. "VENUS!" I yelled into my communicator. "WHERE ARE YOU?"

"I'm up here!" I saw her orange-clad form waving at me wildly from a bridge we were approaching. She had her Love Me Chain alive and hanging from her hand. The TV cameras had spotted her and all light was suddenly on her. She gave them a brilliant Minako smile and dropped the Chain down to our level.

Pluto pointed. "Look!" The police officers had lowered their weapons and were preparing to fire on the dog.


"No, DON'T!" Pluto hollered. "He's not from our time!"

"FIRE!" Little darts hit the dog and he immediately stopped in his tracks and started to weave.

"They were just tranquilizers," I said, wrapping an arm around Pluto's waist and hauling her up off her feet. "We'd better get off this beast, or we're going over!" I reached up and grasped the golden Chain. With a yank from our friend, Pluto and I were flying up towards Venus, to the delight of a cheering crowd.

Pluto ran down from the bridge and gestured for everyone to move away from the unconscious dog before anyone could get near enough to poke and prod him. "I'll send him back to his time!" she exclaimed, her Time Staff materializing in her hand. She raised her Staff and the dog disappeared in a great flash of purple light. The crowd oohed and ahhed.

I would have given anything to have Pluto simply whisk us back home, as several reporters and camera-people approached us. Pluto ran to me and flung her arms around my neck, grateful for my help, and was promptly caught in the snare as well. We were quickly rounded up, together with Venus, and asked a barrage of questions. I could see the others smiling at us from the sidelines, though Usagi looked bummed at not getting the immediate attention for once. I gave Michiru a helpless look and shrugged. Meanwhile, Venus was living it up.


Early in the morning, the whole group of us sat around the TV in Usagi's house, having decided to have an impromptu sleepover. Naturally, we didn't get much sleep and were still up at five to catch the early, early news. The Inners and Hotaru were sprawled on the floor, half-watching, and half-dozing, and Michiru and I had the very shaken Setsuna stretched out across our laps. Our interest perked when the story came on the TV, but Setsuna covered up her face in embarrassment. 'Late last night in Tokyo, some kind of mythological beast was let loose in the downtown area after appearing to have kidnapped both the Sailor Soldier of Pluto and our very own Haruka Tenoh, famous racecar driver.'

"Oh my God." I hid my face against Michiru's shoulder. "This is so humiliating."

"There you are!" cried Hotaru. Yes, there I was, hugging Pluto, in my lingerie.

"Oh my God," I repeated.

The news anchor continued: 'Everything was once again put to rights as Sailor Venus appeared and rescued the two from a possible catastrophe.' Minako and Co. cheered and tossed popcorn around.

The image of Venus suddenly popped up on the screen. 'They were in danger and I was the only one who could save them from the mythological dog, so horribly out of his time! My Venus Love Me Chain and I will always be there to bring assistance to the helpless!" She held out her two fingers in a victory expression and winked.

Setsuna and I glared at Mina. She sweatdropped and pointed to the TV. "Your interviews are coming up now."

'Sailor Pluto was able to send the dog back where he came from, using her Time Stick.'

"'Time Stick'?" Setsuna muttered.

Pluto's face appeared, and her image kept looking around nervously, refusing to meet the camera with her eyes. 'Why didn't I just jump off the dog? Well, I couldnít just leave the dog all alone in a strange city, could I? And Haruka thought I would hurt myself if I jumped, and I probably would have too. I don't have the best luck.' She looked over at someone, probably Michiru. 'Can I go now?'

Setsuna buried her head in her hands. "I look so dumb."

Michiru hugged her tightly. " look cute! Look how cute you are!"

The next footage was of a livid looking Haruka. 'No, I'm not a cross-dresser! I'm a GIRL!'

I banged my head against the back of the couch. "I really want to die."

The anchor was back, giving the camera a bubbly smile. 'So, thanks to the efforts of Sailor Venus, Tokyo is safe once again from invasion.'

Michiru cautiously flipped off the television. "Weíve had enough, don't you think?"

Setsuna and I had clasped our arms around each other in our misery. Meanwhile, Minako was saying to the cheerful Makoto: "I hope they replay the newscast at seven so I can tape it!"

"How does one fall in the Time Stream, Setsuna?" asked Ami. I'm glad she asked, since she did it in a nicer way than Rei would have.

Setsuna groaned. "I was just checking it and I tripped into it. I flew through Time and landed in Hades, right on Cerberus. He got excited and jumped through a Time Portal. It's not like I could help it!" A-ha! My Pluto Cam was correct.

"Sounds like something Usagi would do," chirped Chibi-Usa.

Usagi stopped sponging off wimpy Mamoru's forehead with a washcloth to give the kid a dirty look.

Michiru stroked Setsunaís hair. "Well, dear, you don't have very good coordination. Why do you think Haruka put those cushions down for you in the living room?"

Setsuna sniffled. "I know."

Hotaru suddenly launched herself into Setsuna's lap and threw her arms around her neck. "Don't worry, Suna. We love you anyway!"

We shared a big group hug and then prepared to get some sleep.

"But I donít have anything to wear to sleep," said Setsuna.

"I know!" exclaimed feisty Rei. "I found this in Usagi's drawer." She held up a lacy nightie, not unlike the ones Michiru and I were wearing. Needless to say, Rei quickly got a pillow in the face...


Next Time: Not really sure. :) I have a couple of ideas in the works, but Iím not sure what will come first. What happens when the lovers quarrel? What does Setsuna do when sheís really bored? (And no, it doesnít involve getting Haruka drunk!). All these questions (possibly) answered and more, next time! Expect another Hotaru cameo too.

Also, on a more serious note, itís come to my attention that someone wrote a story thatís a lot like my Chapter 3 of this series. Even though she used her own words for the most part and added things, some of the elements, including the basic plot and some phrasing, look as if they might have been taken from my fic. Iím sure Iím hardly the first one to write about drunken Outers, but just as a reminder to writers, make sure you use your own plot elements even if itís basically open season on the subject. I know originality is mostly dead, but you still have to be very careful of what phrases you use, and at least give some kind of credit if you know your work is inspired by someone elseís. (At least thatís all *I* ask) Iím not even sure if this writer knows she did it (it might have been sort of sub-conscious Ė I worry about that), but if she does and she really did take things from my fic, I just hope she might give me credit so I donít have people accusing me of plagiarizing someone elseís work, thinking I copied it off hers. Thanks!

Until next time,


An Accompanying Illustration:

Black and White Version:

Computer Coloring Attempt:

Oh yes, I also wrote a fanfiction about the deaths of the Outers in the Stars manga. Itís sad, but sweet in that it focuses on the love the four have for each other. Hereís the address if youíre interested:

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