The Odd Adventures of Haruka, Michiru, and Setsuna

By Lady Grizabella


A Lovers’ Quarrel! Haruka And Michiru Are Ridiculously Unreasonable


The day got off to an odd start. The first conscious realization I had was that Setsuna was in bed with us. "Michi, is there something about last night I don’t remember?" I muttered.

It turns out that Setsuna had come into the room, thrown herself on Michiru, and was now begging for Midol, and we girls all know what that means. It meant several fun-filled days of cramps, tears, and irritable mood-swings. Time also seemed to do funny things when Setsuna was in pain. One month, a goat dropped out of a time portal, and Michiru and I spent most of the afternoon trying to shove it back in. Michiru was not happy that day, especially after the goat ate her favorite pair of expensive shoes, and she vowed never to let Setsuna suffer through cramps again.

Michiru sparked into action before the apocalypse could begin. Setsuna already had her eyes shut tightly, and a wail was building up in her throat. Some of us took our time of the month like troupers –


-And some of us didn’t.

Michiru threw a blanket around Setsuna’s shoulders and left her with me. "Midol! Have to find Midol!" she yelled, very much in a panic.

I wrapped my arms around Setsuna and rocked her. "It’ll be over soon."

"Don’t treat me like an infant!" she said in one breath, and then in the next: "It HURTS! Hold me!"

Michiru’s head poked into the room. "We’re out of Midol."

"Get her an Aspirin!" I ordered.

"That won’t work!" howled Setsuna.

"Okay, keep calm everyone." I started to throw off my tank top and boxers in exchange for dress-shirt and jeans. "I’ll just go to the store. You hang tight, Setsuna, and I’ll be back soon."

"Hurry!" ordered the goddess of time. To my horror, I thought I heard the whoosh of a time portal.


When I arrived back from the store, a full regiment of supplies and good craving foods (like chocolate and ice cream) in tow, everything seemed to be in order. No wild animals were roaming the house, and apparently Genghis Kahn was still in his own time (don’t ask). Setsuna was curled up on the couch, whimpering. I entered the living room and rubbed her shoulder. "Here, beautiful. I got you some pills and other supplies and goodies."

"Oh, thank you!" She looked at me gratefully and headed into the kitchen to find some juice.

"Where’s Michiru?" I followed her and put the ice cream in the freezer.

"She took a taxi and went shopping." Setsuna broke open the Midol box. "I think she got sick of me."

I was aghast. "A taxi? Shopping? She knows we’re a little strapped for cash right now!" I ignored the fact I wasn’t helping much with finances.

Setsuna moved slowly, so as not to encourage my wrath. "I’m sure it won’t be that bad, Haruka."

I shut the freezer door with a bang. "Did she take her own money?"

Setsuna hesitated. "Well…no…actually, she took your credit card."


Setsuna had just taken a pill and a big gulp of juice when I yelled, and she promptly started to choke. I started to slap her on the back, absolutely furious. "How could she just take my credit card?! She knows I don’t like it when anyone uses my credit card! You girls and your shopping habits!"

Setsuna sputtered. "Leave me out of this."

"She’s going to hear it when she gets home!" I stomped out of the kitchen and shut myself in my bedroom, slamming the door.

I instantly felt stupid. Maybe she just needed to do a little window shopping to relieve stress. It had to be better than having her suddenly snap, with the consequence of having to pry her out of the bathroom. She would probably come home with a new lipstick, and everything would be fine.


Hours later, I roused myself from my bed where I had drifted off in front of our bedroom television. I hadn’t heard anything from Setsuna, so I figured she was sleeping…or dead. Same difference.

What woke me up had been the sound of the front door. "I’m home!" called Michiru.

I headed out to the living room, prepared to kiss Michiru and ask her if she had had a nice day. "Hey, we missed you!" I called out. "What all did you - ?" The living room floor was covered with bags. I let my mouth hang open, and tried to formulate words. "Wha?…Wha?…"

Michiru smiled. "I went shopping. Didn’t Setsuna tell you? There was a big sale, and I decided I shouldn’t pass it up."

"But, you…"

"I realize I should have taken Setsuna with me, but she didn’t feel well and wanted to sleep. I was looking at the paper after you left, and discovered that the sale was today. I needed to get there before all the good items were taken. There was so much there that I liked!"

"But, you…" I couldn’t speak.

She kneeled next to her twenty-some bags. "Do you want to see what I bought? You should see the designer clothes I found!"

I exploded. "YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE THE SENSIBLE ONE!" I stood over her, foaming at the mouth at the amount of money she must have spent.

She froze and gawked up at me. Presently, her blue eyes filled with tears. "Why are you yelling at me?"

"How much?!" I demanded.

Michiru trembled. "Um…about…six?"

"Six what?"

She cringed. "Hundred?"

"AHHH!" I gave her a look of death.

By then, she had gotten over being hurt, and she was just as angry as I was. "Now, you listen to me Haruka Tenoh! I have every right to go out and buy something if I want! I’m an adult woman, and I have needs!"

"But it’s six hundred dollars!" I thundered. "You’re crazy!"

"You are!" she screamed at me. "Who’s the one who buys motorcycles every year?!" She shoved me.

"That was before we were low on finances! And don’t shove me! It’s wrong to hit a girl!"

"I’m a girl too!"

Setsuna headed into the living room from the hallway, rubbing her eyes sleepily. "What’s going on? Why are you yelling?"

I turned on Setsuna. "Miss Kaioh spent six hundred dollars on clothing and makeup!"

Setsuna, still not fully awake, cowered. I was scary when I was mad.

Michiru looked enraged. "Well, Miss Tenoh here has no right to get on me about money, when all she ever does is buy parts for her precious car!"

"Leave my baby out of this!" I yelled.

Setsuna’s face screwed up. "Don’t fight! I’m miserable!" She burst into tears, and proceeded to start digging through the shopping bags to find anything that might have been bought for her.

"Good job, Haruka! You made her cry! You bully!" Michiru started to gather up half of the bags (Setsuna dragged the other half to her room, tears still flowing freely), and flounced towards our bedroom.

"I’m the bully?! Who’s the one shoving people?" I felt red in the face.

"I don’t think you’d better come near me right now, Haruka!" Michiru dumped the bags in the bedroom and grabbed the doorknob.

"You’ll stay away from me too, if you know what’s good for you!" I answered, grabbing the bathroom door. I immediately pictured the police swarming outside, ready to arrest me for threatening my girlfriend.

"FINE!" Michiru slammed our bedroom door with a crash.

I paused, looking at the bathroom door. "Yeah, well…FINE!" I slammed the bathroom door as hard as I could, even though I was still standing in the hallway.

"Stop the noise!" Setsuna howled from behind her closed door.



Dinner was a stony experience. Michiru came out of the bedroom and boiled a small bit of spaghetti in complete silence. She then very deliberately dished out pasta and sauce onto two, not three, plates. She gave me a look that clearly said ‘I am not attending to you’, and called Setsuna in to dinner.

No one spoke as we ate. Michiru daintily finished all her spaghetti, while Setsuna picked at hers and hardly ate enough to keep a bird alive, due to a very queasy stomach. As for me, I resignedly ate my peanut butter and jelly sandwich and wished that someone would say something. Anything!

Finally, Michiru spoke. "Setsuna dear, please ask Miss Tenoh if she would mind not hogging the bread. There are other people at this table."

Setsuna just looked at her.

I bristled. "Well, you can tell Miss Kaioh that I think what she’s doing is completely childish."

Setsuna quirked an eyebrow. "But you’re doing it too."

Michiru gripped her fork harder. "Well, you just tell Miss Tenoh that I really don’t care what she thinks!"

I rose off my chair several inches and flung a napkin onto the floor. "Setsuna! You tell Miss Kaioh that she’s entirely too girlie! No one needs six hundred dollars worth of clothes!"

Michiru slammed her fork down on the table and yelled, "Well, Miss Tenoh is entirely too boyie, and she doesn’t need to spend six hundred dollars on car parts!"

Setsuna gawked at Michiru. "There’s no such word as ‘boyie’."

"Oh yeah?!" I thundered.

"Yeah!" hollered Michiru.

We both started to scream at each other in a babble of incomprehensible words, both of us picking on each other for anything the other ever did. Finally, there was a horrible shriek and something sliced through the air and hit the table with a crack. The thing just happened to be Setsuna’s Time Staff, and Setsuna was holding it, looking none too happy. "SHUT IT!" she ordered. To illustrate her point, our table cracked down the middle and broke in half, spilling dishes all over the floor. She glared at us, garnet eyes blazing. "OUT! NOW!" She made a threatening gesture with the Time Staff, her other hand pressed to her abdomen. The poor thing still had cramps. "GO!"

We took this as a hint, and quickly made ourselves scarce.

Michiru and I met in the living room. "She’s scary when she’s mad," she said.

"Good thing it’s only once a month, or we’d be spending a fortune on tables."

Then we remembered we weren’t speaking, and turned away from each other. Finally, after several moments of bitter silence, I spoke. "I’m leaving."

Michiru stole a glance at me. "You are?"

"May as well." My voice stuck in my throat. "I wouldn’t be able to sleep if I stayed, and neither would you."

Michiru hung her head. "Go, then."

"I will." I pulled a sweatshirt off the pile by the door and left Michiru standing in the living room, and Setsuna crying for no good reason in the kitchen.


Later that night, I curled up in bed next to Hotaru, having decided to stay at the Tomoe’s. Whether or not Hotaru’s father knew I was there didn’t seem to matter. Hotaru was pretty much left to do her own thing.

Hotaru was sweet and cuddly, but I missed Michiru. I wondered if Michiru was wearing the silver nightie to bed. I wondered if the girls had had ice cream for desert. I wondered if poor Setsuna was still crying. I missed home. Plus, there was a really spooky lamp across the room, and it was just waiting for to fall asleep so it could eat me.

Hotaru suddenly rolled over and her arm flopped hard on my stomach. "Ugh!" I grunted. But I patted Hotaru’s head. She was so cute.

I had just closed my eyes when I heard a noise outside. Some kind of rustling. "Hotaru! Wake up!" I shook the smaller girl.

Hotaru whimpered and rubbed at her eyes. "Ruka, I’m sleeeping."

"Shh...there’s something outside."

The sound of a twig snapping made us jump. "Ruka! What is it?" Hotaru clutched my right hand as my left dug through my clothing pile for my transformation pen. (I was sleeping in my underwear. Hotaru’s father would probably freak.)

The beautiful sound of violin music suddenly drifted through the chill night air. Hotaru and I looked at each other for an instant before we leapt to the window.

Michiru was standing down on the lawn, her eyes closed, playing away. Hotaru looked at me. "It’s so sweet! She’s serenading you!"

I couldn’t answer. My throat had a huge lump in it.

Michiru suddenly raised her eyes to me and she smiled. "Please come back home?"

I hesitated, just drinking in the fact she was down there. Hotaru elbowed me. "You’re both being ridiculous! Go down there and make up!"

It took a twelve-year-old to make me move. I ran down the stairs and out the front door, grabbing for Michiru. I embraced her hard. "I’ve been so stupid! Let’s never fight again!"

"I’ve been stupid too! I never want another harsh word to pass between us!"

Hotaru carefully lay my clothing on the doorstep and shook her head. "Children…" She shut the door.

I scooped up my clothes. Once again, I found myself out in public in my underwear. Why me? "How did you get here, Love?" I had the car.

Michiru shivered. "I took the motorbike."

"You actually got on that thing? You?"

She nodded. "Amazing, isn’t it? I love your car, but could do without the motorbike. The helmet makes my hair stick to my forehead, and it’s just too fast."

I smiled. "You and the violin can take the car. I’ll ride the motorbike. See you at home, sweetie." Truly sickening, yes. But at least we were happy again.



The first thing we did when we arrived home was to attack Setsuna in her bedroom. Poor unassuming Setsuna was placidly poking at her laptop when suddenly she had the lesbian population of the Sailor Soldiers on top of her. "Whaa! It’s three in the morning!"

We hugged her. "Guess what, honey!" I said happily. "Michiru and I are back together!"

"I’m so surprised," she grumbled sarcastically.

"And we vowed never to fight again! So you won’t have to break any more tables."

"I’ll believe it when I see it." Setsuna tried to push us off of her.

Michiru added, "And we just wanted to thank you for putting up with us this afternoon, even though you weren’t feeling well and were horrifically cranky." At this point, we both planted kisses on Setsuna’s cheeks.

The combination of the slight insult and the kisses caused Setsuna to widen her eyes, grab a pillow, and smack us soundly with it. "GO AWAY!"

As we escaped, I couldn’t help but laugh. "Don’t worry, Michi. Give her a couple of days and she’ll be back to being only mildly cranky."

"Yes, I think I’ll wait a couple of days before going through her closet to find all the clothes she snatched while we were fighting…."


Ahh…silly, yet sentimental. Sorry for the delay. Writer’s block. But thanks for the nice reviews!!

Next Time: Michiru finds a very interesting way to get unwanted company away from Setsuna. See you then!

Love, Lady Grizzy

An Accompanying Illustration:

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