H E A V E N ' S D E M O N Angel. Ohhh. Angel. Sigh. Sparkle in eyes, upward curve to lips, moisture on hands, quickening of pulse, breathlessness. Yes, Angel. Oh, alright! Despite my ardent adoration for this absolute GOD, I will attempt to write a (relatively) unbiased account of Angel's character here. (Yeah, uh-hu.) For a less restrained gushing over our resident immortal man of mystery, check out Why Angel is My Soulmate. The thing about Angel is the Mystery. During his time on BtVS, he seemed to have endless depth. That said, I sho' hope the writers over at the WB don't screw things up and make him the 2D character that they've done with the Buffy cast. So Angel. Season One: The angsty yet somehow innocent creature of night. SHy, brooding and breathlessly gorgeous. Totally in love with Buffy and without a clue as to what to do about it. Gotta love the guy! In the episode "Angel", we learnt that he was a - shock,horror - vampire. His sire is Darla, who has a hold over him, even with his soul in place, so that when he kills her, he kills an integral piece of his past. (The idiot! They were so damn *hot* together!) Now Angel is completely apart from his vampiric bretheren, an outcast from their underworld society. He lives alone as a human, living with the knowledge that he will never regain his humanity, but nevertheless, helping in the crusade to protect Humanity (and more importantly, Buffy), from his kind. Slowly but surely he lets himself fall deeper in love with Buffy until there really is never any going back. Season Two: Angel continues the brood man routine for a while, but gets steadily lighter hearted under Buffy's touch. We also see Angel's jealous streak, though what he thinks he has to fear from Xander, I'll never understand! The couple start dating seriously and Angel allows himself to finally express his love for the Slayer. Bad move, soulboy. The consummation of their relationship is also the reincarnation of his inner Mr Hyde, and all goes dark twist of Fate for the two lovers. Now this is when Angel really gets depth. (And when my passion for him begins!) With Angelus out on the loose, preying on Buffy's weaknesses, and bent on destroying her, he displays an obsession that borders on demented love. (Sigh!) In "I Only Have Eyes For You", it is clear with the unnecessarily prolonged kiss that Angelus has a hidden love/desire/whatever who cares, it's Angelus the God of Passion - for the Slayer, that he shamefully cannot contain. Indeed, Willow's line to Buffy in "Passion" is right on target: "You're still the only thing he thinks about". In "Becoming One", we learn about Angel's past. As a human, Angel was a shallow useless being, not unlike Buffy before her Slayerdom. But when he became a vampire, Angelus epitomised evil, terrorising his loved ones and all he met with a song in his heart. ANd then the curse. Hundreds of murders and cries of mercy come flooding into his ears and he collapses in guilt. He is even too weak to kill himself, and instead, exists as a homeless person feeding on rats and other such delicacies. And then Whistler saves him by showing him light. Buffy. Angel instantly falls in love with her "good heart" and makes it his mission in life to guide and protect her. She gives him his second becoming, and for that he is eternally hers. As for the Acathla thing, we all know Angelus would never have killed his lover. I'm convinced he had it planned to sire her so they could roam the world in united evil. But back to the story. So again, Fate steps in and voila, back springs good Angel thanks to Willow's recursing. Too late though, for Buffy has to save the world by kissing and then killing the man of her heart. (The cow!) So off poor unknowing Angel spins to Hell, to suffer hundreds of years of relentless torture while we all pray they don't scar him. Season Three: Not only are our prayers answered, but Angel returns looking better and more buffed than ever! Hell can do bad things to ya, so our heart-throb returns to Buffy's (not so sympathetic) arms quite wild and sweaty (yay, fanfic! Roar! ;0>), and seemingly without hope of recovery. But all is well, for Buffy's presence lifts him out of his beastlyness and he returns to his usual angsty form by the next episode. And this is when the real broodingness sets in. For the entire season, Angel feels bad about himself. First off, when he and Buffy try the 'just firends' routine, he's all like worshipping and needy of her. And considering hse was the one who sent Darling to Hell, I think she should've stuck around fo a while longer instead of dumping him in "Lovers Walk". Sob, did ya see how devastated he was? :( Buffy is his life, without her, he *is* loneliness. He is guilt and darkness and despair. He is dead. Enter the First Evil. It tries to lure Angel back to the dark side, tuning into his demon seld and kicking the already miserable vampire into higher levels of desperation, tempting him with his greatest weakness: Buffy. Driven to the point of suicide, Angel will do anything to save his lover from himself. But Buffy's not just gonna stand and watch, no s'ree. After a tear-jerking display of angst, the two rediscover the intensity of their love for each other. Buffy gives Angel the strength to go on, and Angel takes her guiding hand. Their relationship for the last half of season three grows deeper as they renew their affections and start slay/dating agian. But never again will their lives return to the happy days of early season two. Too much has passed for Angel to ever be guilt-free, especially after his treatment of Buffy when he was evil. In "Enemies" when he pretends to be Angelus, all those awful memories are dregged up again and Angel is speechless with guilt. Also though, there is a distance in their relationship borne of the knowledge that they can never express their love in the physical. Finally strong enough to see the unhappy truth, Angel brings himself to the anguishing act of letting Buffy go. His love is so powerful that he will sacrifice his only happiness for hers. But all is not ended yet. Nope, Angel has to do one more wrong to Buffy before he leaves. He does the unthinkable and sucks her blood (albeit forced by her), almost killing her in the process. Words cannot expres his guilt, and he is driven more than ever to leave her life before he can destroy it any further. The two share a wordless goodbye and Angel floats into the darkness to be comforted by his inner demons and his fated loneliness, poisoned by the bittersweet memory of the love he can never have.