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Commissioner Mark Foley came to ringside
and dropped the bombshell that tonight's
scheduled Battle Royale would not decide
one, but two wrestlers to face the #1
ranked contenders, The Convicts, for
the VCW Tag Team Titles!! 18 men entered
the ring, 16 departed leaving "The Future"
Logan Caine and his soon-to-be partner,
Cuefa The Flying Hawaiian to face Shank
Dorsey and Dale Johnson later in the
night for the Tag belts.
In a re-match, Madman Shirley Doe
out-muscled the spectacular Super Hentai
in what I would consider a mild upset.
Hentai's suicidal moves were just not
enough to overtake the much larger Doe.
Independent Icon strolled to the ring
and announced that he will be having
his own segment in the VCW shows, Icon's
Legendary Lounge. He and his valet,
Pandora Boxx, welcomed fan favorite
Porno The Clown as the inaugural interviewee.
Icon asks the pressing questions about
the clown's health and congratulated
him on his plaque that he received at
the last show. Porno thanked the Icon,
but said his plaque was missing. Suddenly,
Icon produced the missing plaque and
popped Porno in the head with it, threw
him in the ring and began to beat on
him, until Spanky The Clown appeared
from the lockerroom to make the save.
The next match was undoubtedly the
strangest thing this reporter has ever
seen. Spanky The Clown faced off against
VCW newcomer, Slammin' Sammy Simpleton.
This was sooooooooo bizzarre. Spanky
was actually the saner of the two and
kept control of the match up, until
Independent Icon made his presence felt
again. After Spank dropped "The Spank-down"
on Sammy, Icon sent his valet to distract
Porno The Clown and the referee, while
he slid into the ring and waffled Spank
with a chair, and pulled Sammy on top
of the fallen clown for the three count.
Spanky got madder than I have ever seen,
and challenged Double I to a "ClownTown
Street Fight" at the July 28 show. (Whatever
a "ClownTown Street Fight" is..........).
Newcomers Hussla and Carlton Kazz
III faced off in a solid and technical
match. A very impressive debut by both
of these youngsters, who I am sure we
will see more of in future shows. Your
winner, Hussla.
For the vacant VCW Tag Team titles,
the #1 contenders, The Convicts, took
on Battle Royale victors, Cuefa and
Logan Caine. 'The Future' and the Hawaiian
had the upper hand most of the match
until Caine returned to his egotistical
and arrogant ways. He powerbombed his
own partner, leaving the beaten Cuefa
to fend off the "Prisoners of Love"
(SHHHH, they hate being called that!).
It proved to be too much and Cuefa was
pinned. Your new VCW Tag Team Champions
are "The Convicts".
In another Lightweight Qualifying
match, Mike West (aka the missing the
Hardy Brother) had his hands full with
IronMan (did anyone else notice he came
out to an ICP entrance song? Maybe the
ClownPound did!). This match was ebb
and flow, even spilling into the crowd.
Your winner via pinfal, and advancing
in the tournament is Spike Hardy......oops........Mike
West!!!
The Final Solution defended his gold
against "TooCool" Trevor Lowe in a weapons
match. OUCH!! A consumate battle between
these two seasoned professionals, until
a botched move by Final Solution squashed
gest referee, Porno The Clown, allowing
some typical underhanded deceit from
Logan Caine and Pandora (a gift of kindness
from Double I to "even the odds") allowing
Lowe to cover the gigantic Solution
and wrest away the VCW Heavyweight Championship.
The new VCW Heavyweight Champion is
"TooCool" Trevor Lowe.
In the final match of the evening,
Suicide Solution battled the "Two Bald
Mothers", G-Moe and Khan. This was brutal
to the point of scary! Thumbtacks, chairs,
a bed of flourescent light tubes, just
to name a few. Suicide welcomed Khan
to VCW in typical fashion, by beating
the ever-loving snot out of him! The
Solution dropped a 3-d on G-Moe into
the thumbtacks and covered him for the
win.
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