Don't miss Duis Linguini as Mr. Spock
(but somebody I'd like to meet ….)
My kids both wanna be punk-rockers this year. You know you're really getting old when your kids start wearing for Halloween clothes that you actually wore in public at one time...
But some of the best costumes I've ever seen: a group of people who came as a traffic jam, (they all wore cars made out of cardboard boxes, slammed into each other on the dance floor, and cussed each other out.) And one guy, who used glue to stick leaves, cigarette pack-cellophane and other bits of garbage to his clothes, and hair spray to make his hair stick out in 20 different directions, and burst in the door with the announcement "man, it's windy as hell out there!"
The first "date" my wife and I had was when she came to my Halloween party 5 years ago. She came in a very alluring bunny outfit with dryer lint stuck all over it and I came as the Grim Reaper with a frying pan stuck to my butt. Yes, she was a Dust Bunny and I was Death Warmed Over. We had not consulted each other on our costumes at all, and all our friends decided we deserved each other.
The next year we hung large letter "P"s around our necks and stuck foam rubber whales all over ourselves, and we were "Two Peas in a Pod".
The following year we got married that weekend, so we didn't have a costume party, but the next year she went as a hot dog and I went as a beer mug. Together we were Frank & Stein.
Last year she was 7.5 months pregnant, so she came as a goose and I reprised my Death costume, and together we were "Mother Goose and Grimm".
This year, we have a little one to get in on the act. He will be in a cat costume, and we will pose him on an angled piece of cardboard covered with tin foil. Next to this will be a picture of a thermometer that reads 120 degrees. My wife will be wearing a Hershey's Kiss costume with a large spider and some webbing draped over her. I will once again be the Grim Reaper, but this year I will be wearing a 1940's style hat and carrying a sample case that says "Fuller Brush" on the side. I'll leave it as an exercise for the reader to determine what we are individually, and what you get when you put us all together.
(In Loving Memory of B.G., d. 1999)
Always on the lookout for semi-legitimate reasons to throw parties and go out in fancy dress, Halloween has its place in England, too. One year, my best friend and I went out as Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson. We took my dog along as she needed walkies in the park. It was well dark, so we daubed her with non-toxic phosphorescent paint, kept her under a lamp for an hour and ta da! The Hound of the Baskervilles! She had a lovely time terrorising strollers in Green Park.
I love dressing my dog in her own little costumes (she puts up with, just barely). One year she wore a coat with bits of metal objects stuck all over it ("animal magnetism"), another time her coat was covered with wheels off of toy automobiles ("dog tired"), and once she was covered with ears ("dog eared").
This year, B.G. is a very, very old dog (17 1/2) - too old for strenuous running about as Black Shuck or carrying a coat with lots of weight on it. So she's wearing a nice lightweight t-shirt with an outline of her stomach and a painting of a bowl of fruit inside of it. The theme? "Still life in the old dog yet."
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