THE OLD PHILOSOPHER SEZ,

Have you ever taken a real good look at the
English language. It's one of the hardest
languages to learn. Here's a few reasons why.

1. WE POLISH THE POLISH CAR.

2. HE COULD LEAD IF HE WOULD GET THE LEAD OUT.

3. A FARM CAN PRODUCE PRODUCE.

4. THE DUMP WAS SO FULL IT HAD TO REFUSE REFUSE.

5. THE SOLDIER DECIDED TO DESERT IN THE DESERT.

6. THE PRESENT IS A GOOD TIME TO PRESENT THE 
     PRESENT.

7. THE DOVE DOVE INTO THE BUSHES.

8. I DID NOT OBJECT TO THE OBJECT.

9. THE INSURANCE FOR THE INVALID WAS INVALID.

10.THE BANDAGE WAS WOUND AROUND THE WOUND.

11.THEY WERE TOO CLOSE TO THE DOOR TO CLOSE
      IT.

12.THE WIND WAS TOO STRONG TO WIND THE SAIL.

13. I SHED A TEAR WHEN I SAW THE TEAR IN MY
      CLOTHES.

14. I HAD TO SUBJECT THE SUBJECT TO A SERIES 
     OF TEST.

But we can also have fun with English:

1. WHY IS IT THAT NO WORD IN THE ENGLISH 
    LANGUAGE RHYMES WITH ORANGE, SILVER 
    OR PURPLE?

2. WHY ARE A WISE MAN AND A WISE GUY OPPOSITES
     WHEN A SLIM CHANCE AND A FAT CHANCE ARE
     THE SAME?

3. WHY DO OVERLOOK AND OVERSEE MEAN OPPOSITE
    THINGS  AND QUITE A FEW AND QUITE A LOT ARE 
    THE SAME?

4. IF PEOPLE FROM POLAND ARE CALLED 'POLES', WHY 
    AREN'T PEOPLE FROM HOLLAND CALLED 'HOLES"?

5. IF YOU HAVE A BUNCH OF ODDS AND ENDS AND GET 
    RID OF ONE OF THEM, WHAT DO YOU CALL IT?

6. WHY DO WE HAVE NOSES THAT RUN AND FEET THAT 
   SMELL?

7. YOU HAVE TO MARVEL AT THE UNIQUE LUNACY OF 
    A LANGUAGE IN WHICH YOUR HOUSE CAN BURN UP 
    AS IT BURNS DOWN AND IN WHICH YOU FILL IN A 
    FORM BY FILLING IT OUT.

LETS FACE IT, ENGLISH IS A CRAZY LANGUAGE! THERE 
IS NO EGG IN EGGPLANT,
NO HAM IN HAMBURGER. 
THERE'S NO APPLE OR PINE IN PINEAPPLES. 
ENGLISH MUFFINS WEREN'T INVENTED IN ENGLAND 
OR FRENCH FRIES IN FRANCE. 
SWEETMEATS ARE CANDIES, WHILE SWEETBREAD, 
WHICH ISN'T SWEET, IS MEAT.