Yep, that's what the instructor promised, and that's what he delivered!

What a day!

The initial realization that I was probably THE only one there who never really painted set in early in the day, though I was somewhat surprised that I knew a lot of the terminology, I mean I oughta, I've read enough books and surf enough porn, errrr, I mean art sites to have picked up on some things ;)

When he said that watercolour was probably THE most difficult medium to 'master', I quickly went from shock to panic to wondering what in the world I thought I'd accomplish by doing this in the first place to finally just giving in and saying...fuck it!  I'm here to learn, not paint a masterpiece!

Ok so my blood pressure was still a bit high at that point.  I mean feeling overwhelmed is one thing, but feeling overwhelmed in a class full of people is quite another.

Anyhoo...

One should not expect miracles on the first day, and first thing tomorrow morning, we have to pick one of our two works that we'd like him to critique...they're both crap, what more could he say that would make me feel any worse? lol

He kept saying that he wanted us to paint loosely....tomorrow I wanna be a loosy goosy, get into my 'zone' and just let the paint flow......

With the crayons, I was just starting to develop a layering technique that lets me play with tonal values, and I suppose I should expect too much until I can play and practice with this medium as well.

Beh!

I'll get a good start out tomorrow...it didn't help that the electrical storms we've been having knocked the power out and my alarm went off an hour late this morning, I had to leave without having my morning coffee...

I mean no caffeine all day = shitsgonnahappensista! 

So imma concentrate on a better start to the day...

I'm about to roughly sketch out tomorrow morning's piece, then I guess I'll start packing my lil goober's bag for his 1-week trip to Niagara Falls.

*sniff sniff*  mah baby's never been away THAT long before, I'm certainly going to miss him, that's for sure!

Here are the two demos that Mr Doug Mays did in class today.  He's a fun teacher, and to be honest I'm really digging his style.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v298/Sylphe/Artsy%20Stuff/IMG_3178.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v298/Sylphe/Artsy%20Stuff/IMG_3197.jpg

They were both done from pictures he took in France.  They are lovely paintings, don't you think?

En tout cas...I'm gonna get myself a cup of coffee, put on a bit of music, and do my homework for tomorrow.

I've just decided that I'll eeny, meeny, miney mo in order to chose one of my paintings for him to critique.

You?  You might NEVAR get to see them (you lucky bastas!)

*wink wink*

Addendum:  looks like the boy might have a bit of poison oak, or poison ivy or somesuch, now I have to miraculously squeeze in a visit to the clinic with him before his wednesday departure!

I've been bathing him in oatmeal baths and got him a non-prescript cortisteroidal ointment.  I was hoping it'd do the trick but it doesn't look like it is :(

I'll have to make sure to pack him his own facecloths and towels.

Geebus!

~~~~

K, off I goes now...ta~

Mood:  incredulous

The boy was outside riding his dirt bike and I was coming up from doing a load of laundry.

“Mom, quick, come see, come see!!” he says as he ushers me out the front door.

I’m expecting what…maybe a deer, or a bear, some other wild animal perhaps?

Well, I was not prepared to see a big aircraft (a 747 mebee? what do I know about planes?) just above the tree line. I mean we see them fly over here all the time, but never THAT low.

Sure I’ve seen them flying at that altitude when nearing or departing from an airport, but there are no airport to within 100 miles and another about 200-250 miles southeast of here. Save maybe the military base about an hour to the northwest.

“It was lower, and the ground shook mommy, then it flew a bit higher”

(Only shaking I felt from the basement, was the spin cycle though)

Ok, so a bit out of the ordinary but whatever…

I went back inside to grab my camera because I was going to bring the boy some cardboard and rags so he could spray paint his bike (he’s 12 years old, he wants to spray paint everything! He’s outgrowing it and it doesn’t run all that well anymore so I figured why the heck not) this is about 5 minutes since the aircraft incident, and I can hear it coming again at an alarming low altitude (from OUR point of view you understand) and why would it be coming right back in this direction???

I had my camera in hand so naturally I took a few shots. These are not zoomed in, so she was low I tell yas…

(Airplane 1)

(Airplane 2)

(Airplane 3)

It was also flying pretty slow and veered a bit left as it disappeared behind the clouds. It looked like the plane was looking for a place to land to be honest.

So I went inside, called 911 and asked to be put through to the police. They took my name and number and called me back about 10 minutes later saying that they had checked with aerial authorities in Montreal and were told that there was a company conducting motor-related testing northeast of Ottawa, and asked if this was the area where I lived and I said, yes.

Then she asked if I heard or saw anything since calling them, and I told her no. She asked me to call them back if I heard or saw anything out of the ordinary. And of course the boy is saying “see mom, I told you there couldn’t be anything wrong”

“well boy, you never know, there very well could be,” I told him, “and if something were to happen, it’s people calling in like this who would be one of the first clues/links to helping them if they were in distress,” -Life lesson # 867 ;)

(she just flew over again twice as I typed this, a bit higher this time though)

My mom called me in between all of this, a little bit excited and concerned about the incident herself ;)

*phew*

so there you have it, a taste of this peaceful life in the sticks ;)

~~~~~~

Here is the boy with a cheesy look on his face.

(Bike Boy)

Hmm, I really need to do something about these overgrow plants on this side of the house, dontcha think?

(The Jungle)

~~~~

Going to go sit outside for a bit before it rains again…gonna take my crayons with me too I think. (and my camera just in case!) Ta~ Bummer I’m too late…it’s pouring again :(

P.S. Here is something I did a while back, not sure I really like it myself...I didn't do the layering that I normally do with them, so I'm seeing that my technique serves a purpose.

(Sol-Étude)

I've been toying with the idea of adding my poetry to my finished pieces...what do you think?

Didn't go back to bed afterall, I headed out after I had my coffee and straight into a torrential downpour...visibility was almost nil and the streets were flooded. 

It's a good thing I was wearing sandals because I ended up in shin-deep water puddles.

I mean there were white caps in the streets for crying out loud, I'd never seen so much water rushing down the road that way.  You could have taken out a boogie board ;)   Even felt my brakes slip on me as I drove through some of these huge, I hesitate to call them puddles, through these rivers.

When I got to the city, the sun was shinning and it got hot and humid rather quickly.  So I didn't mess around, well ok I checked out the scrapbooking isle, but then I went straight to my business.

Had lunch, got stuck waiting for the train to go by, absolutly loved it....still gonna hop one some day ;)  Then headed back home again, and despite the fact that I was alone, I was still gone for about 6hrs.  so basically my day was shot.

Had to return a few calls when I got home, one of which was from a friend who's 2 sons hang out with, sleep over with, go dirtbiking with, plays sports with, go to events together with my youngest. 

She invited the little goober to go spend a week with them in Niagara Falls and wants to take them to Marine Land, to the Falls and do a whole heaping bunch of stuff with them. 

I just need to cough up the dough for admissions and such.  He'll be staying with them at her husband's appartment (he works on the big tunnel).

They'd leave next Wednesday and would be back on August 5th.

I'd been wanting to do something with him this summer anyway, going to Wonderland didn't pan out because my sister-in-law backed down at the last minute, so I'm sorely tempted to send the boy.  

He does want to go, and wouldn't get homesick I don't think, I was there myself at his age, 30 years ago...yep I'm THAT old! :P~~~

I think it's going to be stormy again throughout the night, but I'm pretty sure the worst has passed on.

Well this old chica's gonna hit the hay....gonna take my new art magazine to bed with me tonight. 

I'm toying with a bit of a twist to add to my artwork.  Also want to get into doing more multi media.   I'll throw a few ideas out there tomorrow and see what my hoards of admirers think...heh! 

k, I'm starting to amuse myself with my own stupidity, it can only mean that I'm over-tired, so off to bed with me now.

G'nite~ 

Yup, I think we got whipped by the tail end of Hurricane Dolly last night. 

Wind and heavy, HEAVY rain.  I was up till 3:00 a.m. taking care of a leaky roof in at least 4 spots...this is not good, I'm gonna have to get someone to go up and tar my roof.

Then of course the habitual menagerie kept me up...at 5 a.m. the cat was trying to tear down the door because he wanted in (tried calling the stupid beast in last night but he wouldn't come)  then at 6 the dogs got whiney because they wanted out of the basement.  So I went back to bed nursing a throbbing headache, only to get awaken at 7 a.m. by a Skidder roaring across the road.  I believe he was back-blading someone's washed-out driveway.

So here I am baggy-eyed and somewhat sluggish having to head off to do some banking and then off to do some grocery shopping. 

Blarg...I really don't feel like it.

Of course now that I'm up, everything is so quiet you could hear a pin drop.

~~~~

I made good headway in cleaning up and re-organizing my 'studio' (workspace).  The creative bug has bitten me but I refuse to give in till it is all clean.

I did do some touch-ups on a few pieces, then trimmed them and set them up in my portfolio.  (and yes, I fixed naked girl's ugly, ugly lips with a pigment marker)  I will post some new stuff soon.

But for now my debate is the following....crawl back into bed for an hour's sleep, or get ready to head off and do the stuff I need to get done....

Got a call today asking if the boy could go in for surgery on the 1st of August. 

When I asked at what time, I was told that I'd receive a call the day before to tell us what time we need to be there, and if there are any preps that we need to know of.

I told her we lived 2 hrs away, and said I hope we don't have to be there at 6 a.m.  She said she had no idea and that we'd find out the day before.  She also said he'd be coming back home that same day.

*insert french cussing tyrade here* 

Drive through, fly by the seat of your pants surgery...gotta love it. 

So I'm up for a busy, busy week next week.  Mon-thurs/9-4 is my watercolour workshop, then the next day I get up at some ungodly hour more than likely, drive the boy to the hospital and park my fat ass to wait for at least 8-10 hours if not more, then drive  2 hrs back home. 

Oh well, I just hope everything goes well and that the procedure is not too invasive so he can recover from it quickly and get back on track with his physical therapy.

I'll be glad when it's behind us.

Mood:  mischievious

reeeally ponderous...

and then my shoes started to squeak

I’d forgotten about this one. Heard it years ago and it kind of stuck the quirky side of me I guess. ;)

So I was thinking…about what poetry is, what it means to people, and where it is found.

In conversation today someone said “I wish I was a poet” And I thought…but you are! Poetry is all around us, we live it every day, poetry is a moment, a place, poetry is people, a conversation. It’s the summer sun, the moon and the stars, the ripples on a lake, and the burst of flavour when you pop a fresh berry in your mouth, poetry is you and it’s me…see?

~~~~

The boy is gone to sleep over at my mom’s tonight with his cousin Nicholas.

I love the little goober to pieces, I do…but man it’s quiet when he’s not around! I can actually hear myself think.

“Can you see what I’m saying?”

~~~~

A taste of Neruda before I go?

Ok, I knew you’d say yes! :)

For All To Know

Someone will ask later, sometimes searching for a name,

his own or someone else’s,

why I neglected his sadness or his love

or his reason or his delirium or his hardships:

and he’ll be right: it was my duty to name you,

you, someone far away and someone close by,

to name someone for his heroic scar,

to name a woman for her petal,

the arrogant one for his fierce innocence,

the forgotten one for his famous obscurity.

But I didn’t have enough time or ink for everyone.

Or maybe it was the strain of the city, of time,

the cold heart of the clocks

that beat interrupting my measure,

something happened, I didn’t decipher it,

I couldn’t grasp each and every meaning:

I ask forgiveness from anyone not here:

it was my duty to understand everybody,

becoming delirious, weak, unyielding, compromised, heroic, vile, loving until I wept,

and sometimes an ingrate, a savior entangled in his own chains,

all dressed in black, toasting to joy.

Why describe your truths if I lived with them,

I am everybody and every time, I always call myself by your name.

Sonnet LXXXI

And now you’re mine. Rest with your dream in my dream.

Love and pain and work should all sleep, now.

The night turns on its invisible wheels,

and you are pure beside me as a sleeping amber.

No one else, Love, will sleep in my dreams.

You will go, we will go together, over the waters of time.

No one else will travel through the shadows with me,

only you, evergreen, ever sun, ever moon.

Your hands have already opened their delicate fists

and let their soft drifting signs drop away;

you eyes closed like two gray wings, and I move after,

following the folding water you carry, that carries me away.

The night, the world, the wind, spin out their destiny.

Without you, I am your dream, only that, and that is all.

~~~~

G'nite~

When are you most comfortable? 

I am when doing one, or a combination of the following things:  Listening to music, reading poetry/reading a good book, semi-clothed like on a beautiful warm summer day just like today, creating something with my own hands basically, whether it be creating a 'chef -d’oeuvre' in the kitchen, knitting, sewing, scrapbooking, drawing, painting, working on some other art project, or simply looking at artwork…*siiiiigh* yep that’s me at my finest moment and highest comfort level. 

I wanted to prolong the feeling, so I shaved from armpits to toes. Then I went for a drive near a couple of lakes, thinking how I'd be stitting on one of those docks that lined the shores till the dew fell.  Anyway, I am smooth and soft and will sleep well tonight on my fresh Egyptian Cotton sheets.

My kitty’s rubbing up against me at the moment, he’s soft too!  He’s pissed off that I won’t let him go out to prowl tonight.  I mean the prowling is one thing, but the meowing and scratching at the door at 5 a.m. when I’ve only finally gone to sleep at 4, I can do without thankyouverymuch! 

He always manages to slip by one of the boys when they open the door, but not tonight!  I’ve been holding him captive and will put him in the basement shortly. 

~~~~~ 

The house is so quiet tonight, the wee boy is gone for a sleep-over at a friend’s house, and my oldest is doing his own thing in the with his guitar and my laptop in the living room.   

Incidentally, a cute young lad came to my door a few hours ago and when I answered it he asked if there was a certain so-and-so who lived here.  I thought perhaps this was an old school buddy coming to visit him, I said yes and sort of invited him in pointing to my son sitting in the chair.  Then he pulled out a wallet saying he’d found it whilst biking on a dirt road, where my son had stopped for a road-side wizz the other night.  Couldn’t help myself, I did the whole ‘I told you so’ at that point, because I knew that’s where he’d lost it when he told me about the pit, er piss stop. 

Ah well, it’s too late, we’d already cancelled and filled out whatever paperwork we had to for replacements.  But at least I’m glad it’s back in his possession. I offered the fella a 20-spot for his trouble, (well ok, it was from my son’s wallet but still!)  He refused to take it, saying he knew what it felt like…I’m just happy there are still some good people out there, yanno? :) 

~~~~ 

Have you ever have these ‘aha moments’ where you realize something that was so very apparent, but you were so busy trying to deal with it that you sort of shrugged the solution away?   

Like trying to suppress thoughts and or memories of an event or a person because it’s too painful to think about for example.  You’re just as well to let it wash over you and go through the motions, and then let it ebb away…resistance is futile, and causes you to expend too much energy.   

Let the waves serve their purpose, let them wash over you, through you, and sift away some of that pain.  It’s much more therapeutic that way. (4 a.m. wisdom) 

And now as the summer breeze gently blows through my window, I shall leave you with a sonnet or two and bid you goodnight...

Sonnet XII 

When I do count the clock that tells the time,
And see the brave day sunk in hideous night;
When I behold the violet past prime,
And sable curls, all silvered o'er with white;
When lofty trees I see barren of leaves,
Which erst from heat did canopy the herd,
And summer's green all girded up in sheaves,
Borne on the bier with white and bristly beard,
Then of thy beauty do I question make,
That thou among the wastes of time must go,
Since sweets and beauties do themselves forsake
And die as fast as they see others grow;
And nothing 'gainst Time's scythe can make defense
Save breed, to brave him when he takes thee hence. 

Sonnet LXI 

Is it thy will, thy image should keep open
My heavy eyelids to the weary night?
Dost thou desire my slumbers should be broken,
While shadows like to thee do mock my sight?
Is it thy spirit that thou send'st from thee
So far from home into my deeds to pry,
To find out shames and idle hours in me,
The scope and tenor of thy jealousy?
O, no! thy love, though much, is not so great:
It is my love that keeps mine eye awake:
Mine own true love that doth my rest defeat,
To play the watchman ever for thy sake:
For thee watch I, whilst thou dost wake elsewhere,
From me far off, with others all too near.

*sigh* 

I do believe my comfort level is such that I can get some much needed sleep now.

Bonsoir~

No, not Bleu Nuit, the softcore Québec broadcast...doh!  It used to be on every Saturday night...hmm, I wonder if it still is.

Hard time getting to sleep last night, had the blues, cried myself a river, and finally fell asleep somewhere around 4 a.m.  But what else is new, eh?  Sleep just has a way of eluding me for one reason or another it seems.

I brought my mom and the boy blueberry picking yesterday in the blistering heat of day.  The worst part was walking away from a field still very ripe for the picking, because we had to admit that the sun and the heat had had the best of us. 

I might go back in a few days, but in the earlier morning hours.

The first spot we found was in full direct sunlight, but after driving through a couple of dirt roads to show my mom where all the 'spots' were, we got to the best one...near a lake, a few trees to provide shade, the birds were singing, boat motor humming in the distance...it was just heavenly!

My little get-together with the girls went well on Friday.  My sister in law had to bring her kids over, but I was glad because they played with my boy and kept him occupied.  All we could hear were the sounds of kids having a great time!  Even 3-yr old Connor exclaimed  "I lub auntie's parties!"

I told my little niece that if she pulled my name out of the bag for the door prize that I'd give her an extra piece of cake, and guess who's name came out? LOL   So it was fun, and a beneficial for me as well.

~~~~

My oldest came home Thursday night with the news that he'd lost his wallet.

I was upset, but rather than lecture the boy I sat down with him to list all the stuff he needed to get replaced (because let's face it, sometimes shit just happens)...credit/debit cards, driver's license, medical/hospital cards, hunting card, fishing license, and the biggie...social insurance card.  

*siiiigh*  that's the one that's got me worried...(have to open a police file tomorrow)  I sent him off to human resources, license bureau, ect...and we still has to make a bunch of phone calls tomorrow as well.

He'll be more vigilant after going through all the BS of getting everything replaced I'm sure, and I'm making it a point to make HIM do it all, because it would be way too easy to have me do it. 

It's just one of those lessons that you have to learn the hard way unfortunately.

~~~~

I think I will get some laundry started, and bake a blueberry cobbler. 

I may play with my crayons later, read a bit of poetry, and listen to some music.  

Yep, sounds just about right for a Sunday afternoon, dontcha think? 

Ciao~

All that is left is the preparation of food & tidying in the kitchen after myself but I'm leaving that for tomorrow.

I've got a Caramel Apple Coffee Cake in the oven at the moment, so I'm taking a well-earned break!

The boy is bringing his desk downstairs to make room for his drum set in his bedroom once again.  That child re-arranges furniture weekly!  I don't mind it there though, it's actually louder when he plays them in the basement, but I never did mind loud music anyhow ;)

A buddy of his, since Pre-K, Brandon (aka Boo...pretty sure they call him that still, but it's so cute!) brought his electric guitar over and they had a little jam session this afternoon. 

My oldest laughed at them at first, but the little buggers are pretty good for a couple of 12-yr olds.

Boo's a rocker!  Who knew?

I asked my oldest son if all of this brought back memories of his first encounters as a guitar player, and he just laughed in response.  But even he had to admit that by the end of the session, they cought on to each other's rhythm pretty quickly and that with a lot of practice they could be very good together. 

Of course he took advantage of the opportunity to teach the boy a few things, and he even let him touch his Les Paul!  LOL  Guyz!

On the flip side of that, I broke and chipped a couple of nails today whilst on maid duty, darnit!  And they were the perfect length for leaving nice marks on/digging into skin too!

Ah well...they'll grow again ;)

oh! Oh, OOOOOOOH!  *girlie squeals*

I called up the hospital today to ask if they thought my son would be called in at the end of July, as we were told.  She said that while she could not pin-point exactly 'when' it would be, she could however tell me that it would definitely not be July because they are filled to capacity for the month.

So Yeeeeee!  I get to go to my 4-day watercolour workshop afterall!!

*insert more girlie girl squeals here*

T minus 11 days and counting.... 

Ok, the cake's ready!

*slap*   Keep your mitts off! 

It's for tomorrow's get-together with the girls. 

If there's any left, then maybe I'll invite you over for a piece ;)

Mood:  chillin'

On Friday, I picked up my parents and drove out to meet my sister half way to the city, pooled up in one car, and drove off to see my sister at her new residence.

My parents hadn’t seen her since last August, I hadn’t seen her since Christmas, my other sister living closer to the city, had visited her a couple of times since her placement.

It was a great surprise…my sister and I went up to her room, got in passed hugs & kisses and as she opened the door to her balcony, we pointed below and told her we had a surprise for her.  My parents rushed up to see her and it was a big hug/kiss/teary love-fest!

They’d been so worried about her and missed her terribly.  My parents are both sickly and Dad doesn’t drive much anymore, but its more the nature of my sister’s illness that’s kept them away. 

Despite all, they were both relieved to see her living conditions were much as my sister and I had explained.  They know she’s being well taken care of and that she’s on an even keel for as long as she’s taking her medication and that’s all a part of the package that is living in this residence.

It’s the best solution for her seeing as she wanted to live close to her daughters.  It’s further for us and difficult to get out there to see her much, but we promised my parents that we’d make it a monthly visit over the remaining warmer months at least. 

Mental illness has got to be THE worst thing that a family has to deal with.  It tears you apart in so many ways.

I don’t know if any of this makes any sense to anyone else, but I’m just so glad that we finally were able to coordinate this outing with my parents.  It has been a painful separation for them.

*sigh*

My agenda is looking semi-busy this week so far, which is really a bit of a break for me. ;)

-Physical therapy X 4

-picnic & outing to the lake with my sister in law and 4 kids,

-orthodontist (with Mr Brace Face) 

-shopping for my get-together on Friday, the wild

-blueberries are going to be ripe for the picking later this week (cannot miss that)

-last-minute tidying and preparing of food. 

(this is not counting all the 'unexpected' things that are

sure to pop up somewhere along the line)

So all in all, not bad!

~~~~~

Absolutely still loving my Alanis CD.   I’m stuck on three particular songs  Not As We, Underneath, and In Praise Of The Vulnerable Man.  If you haven’t listened yet…DO!

I brought the boy down to the lake for a bit this afternoon. 

To my aunt’s cottage; where I spent so many summers of my own youth chasing frogs and fireflies or bobbing the afternoons away in the cool waters of the lake that our town is named for.

The water was cold and he dropped his towel in the lake, so he wanted to leave straight away, but I could have spent the entire afternoon sitting beneath a tree just staring out over the lake, and absorbing the sounds of summer; where even the bouts of silence sang so sweetly to my ears.

A STATUE IN THE SILENCE 

So much happens in the hubbub,

so many bells were heard to ring

whenever they loved or discovered

or when they decorated one another

that I didn’t trust the uproarand came to live, standing

in this zone of silence.

When a plum falls,

when a wave faints,

when young golden girls roll

on the softness of the sand,

or when in succession

immense birds guide me —

in my quite exploration,

it doesn’t ring or howl or thunder,

or whisper or murmur:

that is why I live on

in the music of silence.

The air is still mute,

the automobiles skid

on invisible cotton balls

and the political crowds

with gloved gestures

occur in a hemisphere

where no flies buzz.

The most gossipy women

drowned in stone pools

or sail like swans,

like clouds in the sky,

and the summer trains roll

full of fruits and mouths

without a whistle or wheel

that creaks, like cyclones

chained to silence.

The months are like curtains,

like quiet carpets:

here the seasons dance

until it falls asleep in the living room,

the immobile statue of winter.

PHILOSOPHY

The truth of the green tree

in spring and of Earth’s crust

is proven beyond a doubt:

the planets nourish us

despite eruptions

and the sea offers us fish

despite her quaking:

we are slaves of the earth

that is also governess of air.

Walking around an orange

I spent more than one life

echoing the earth’s sphere:

geography and ambrosia:

juices the color of hyacinth

and the white scent of woman

like blossoms of flower.

Nothing is gained by flying

to escape this glove

that trapped you at birth.

And we need to confess our hope

that understanding and love

come from below, climb

and grow inside us

like onions, like oak trees,

like tortoises or flowers,

like countries, like races,

like roads and destinations.

ANOTHER THING 

So little happens to me

that I must count and recount.

Nobody gives me asphodels

and nobody makes me sigh.

Because I arrived at the crossroads

from a complicated destination,

when ticking clocks fade away

and the sky tumbles across the sky

until the dying day

takes the moon for a walk.

How long does the beauty of equinox

take to disentangle itself,

turning from green to round,

from ocean wave to cataract

from proud sun to white moon,

from solitude to capital city

without changing the equation

of the world where nothing happens.

Nothing happens except a day

that like a model student

weighs its worth in rewards

at the end of another winning day,

until the once-a-week chorus

has turned itself into a ring

that not even night transfigures

because it arrives encrusted with jewels,

full of omens as always.

Let’s see if they can net the crazy fish

that climb like platypuses

along the walls of my house

and shatter the new harmony

that pursues me and torments me.

-Pablo Neruda

Bonsoir~

pssst...Hey John, you still on vacation?  ;)

Mood:  sad

I’m a nice shade of lobster these days, as in…ouch!   Oh I remembered to apply sunscreen to my child, but not on myself.  And 5 hours in an open field at 35 º C heat + a UV of scorching hot+ not wearing a hat= uh yeah dumb dumb, that would kind of be asking for it!   

Hell of a way to get a tan, only I sort of just turn a reddish-brown hue (must be my Algonquian bloodline). 

Past few days have been very hot, the air has been humid and thin, but the evenings are still thankfully refreshing, especially if you sleep naked…which I don’t. heh! 

Anyway, our town won the soccer tournament in 3 of the 4 division.Yay!  I guess you could say we were kickin! 

Kids were totally exhausted after 3 games in that sizzling sun, but happy none the less. 

And, as predicted, it took exactly 3 days to hear the “I’m bored’s” now that soccer is over for the season. So I thought I’d put the boy to good use and bring him strawberry picking with me yesterday.  Turns out he’s not much of a picker, he’s more of an eater, and with him just sitting between the rows pitching berries at me, I was getting more flustered by the minute, so I made quick work of it.   

We (I mostly) did manage to pick about 20 lbs of berries though, which I then had to clean, bag & freeze, but *yummers* it sure is worth the effort! 

I’ve got some cleaning I want to get done in the next week, because I’m having some ladies over next Friday for a little get-together (my turn to host) and I need to plan my menu, then shop for it, and somehow squeeze all of that in between physical therapy appointments with the boy and orthodontist appointment with the wee’er boy.  At least we’re not running 3 evening/week for soccer games now, so it should be a breeze! ;) 

Needless to say, I’ve not had time for any artwork…and speaking of which…Only 3 weeks till my watercolour class!  *insert girlie sq* oh yeah, there may be a problem with that…the boy’s is on “the list” for his 4^th surgery, scheduled ‘at the end of July’.  :(   

I’m sorta keeping my fingers crossed though, because we all know how those waiting lists for surgery generally go…but you know, knowing my luck, ‘end of July’ will actually MEAN the end of July. 

*sigh*  and it’s paid for and everything, it’d be a damn shame to have to miss it.

~~~~~~~ 

Darn YouTube, I get sucked in every time!  I went looking for some Francis Cabrel and found this one that’s left me feeling a bit melancholy.    

http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=DEbRgolO2QY&feature=related 

Francis Cabrel - Je Te Suivrai 

Y'a plusieurs mètres d'eau dans les rues de ma peine
Plusieurs tonnes de boue dans le flot de mes veines
La rivière charrie les fils de téléphone
Avec encore dedans mes appels qui résonnent
La pluie a délavé tous les mots que j'invente
Les oiseaux ont crié pour pas que tu m'entendes
Aux endroits où tu étais y'a des morceaux de glace
Et des arbres en travers pour pas que je passe

Où tu iras je te suivrai
Je te suivrai...

Même quand tu auras fermé ta centaine de portes
Même quand tu auras pleuré pour les enfants d'un autre
Même quand tu auras éteint ce qui brûlait de mieux
Même si tu pars plus loin que ne portent mes yeux

Où tu iras je te suivrai
Je te suivrai...

Même au plus profond du silence
Je t'entends encore me dire
On s'approche du ciel

Nos livres fermés se balancent
J'veux pas tomber tout seultomber tout seul
J'veux pas tomber tout seul

Si tu veux j'aimerai même ceux qui te touchent
Ceux qui ont le goût de toi encore plein la bouche
Même ceux que tu hais, même ceux que tu aimes
Il y a tellement d'eau dans les rues de ma peine...

Où tu iras je te suivrai
Où tu iras...

Je t'entends encore me dire
On s'approche du ciel
J'veux pas tomber tout seultomber tout seul
J'veux pas tomber tout seul

Il a neigé partout aux rebords des fenêtres
De cette ville floue ne plus te connaître
Encore combien d'hivers passeront sous ma porte
Avant qu'un jour j'ose dire que j'aime quelqu'un d'autre.

This is another one of my Cabrel favorites… 

http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=85lKsSCZm4k&feature=related  

Oh and I must be <strike>psycho</strike> psychic or something, becauseit looks like my neighbor got rid of his dog.  Trust me, the dog is much better off if it's been put down :(

He who is cruel to animals becomes hard also in his dealings with men.  We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals.

- Immanuel Kant

Seems like all the animals in my vacinity have been flocking toward me today.

My mom's pooch was all over me giving me big doggie kisses, and my own two dogs and cat were rubbing up against me and laying at my feet.

My neighbor's dog was here as well...I have serious issues with them as far as their dog is concerned.  My son gives it water almost every day and it looks like its gone hungry on more than one occasion.

If you can't or don't want to take care of your pets, get rid of them, pure and simple, you'll be doing them a favor.

~~~~

The boy's soccer game was won by default because once again, an opposing team didn't even show up.  And that's another thing that I don't get about people, where has their sense of committment and obligation gone?  I think it is an important thing that you need to teach your children, to make them see something through till the end.

Speaking of seeing the end, their season will be over with Saturday's all-day tournament.  The long-range forecast looks good so far, so here's to hoping the weather holds up for them.

At least this was something that kept them busy, I'm anticipating a bit of boredom in the weeks to come.  Ah well tis all part of summer vacation ;)

The boy is waiting for the computer to play a game so I better get going

Ta~ 

I do enjoy the glorious days of sunshine like anyone else; we have been sadly lacking them of late, and I might complain somewhat, but truth be known, I don’t feel so ‘out of place’ on these drab rainy days.   

I’ve learnt how to wear the different shades of grey quite stylishly, and can blend into the atmosphere rather unnoticed.  I like it that way.  I get to absorb and observe without being the object of scrutiny.   

I can melt into a crack on the sidewalk if your steps become too hurried and I fear you’ll catch up to me… 

Um ok, I guess I’m in somewhat of a reclusive mood lately. 

I did some touch-ups on m’lady’s arm, eye, and lips, but I think that’s as far as I’m going.  It’s not as easy as it might look to get fine detailing in with a square piece of chalk, and I don’t want to mess it all up. So here she is in her finished state.  She looks a bit wet (dirty girl) from the sprayed on fixative still in this pic. 

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v298/Sylphe/Artsy%20Stuff/BueeFinished.jpg 

I was in the mood to play again, so I’ve been working on this piece that I have now retitled Windswept. 

I’m really not sure what direction it’s going because I’m still at the 'prop it up and stare at it for a while' stage of things.  To be honest a part of me likes it just the way it is, but who knows what might jump off the page! 

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v298/Sylphe/Artsy%20Stuff/Windswept.jpg

So If I had to pick a song that best represents me at the moment, it would be one of these song by Metallica & The San Francisco Symphony Orchestra. (That’s right, I got sucked in by youtube again, what of it?!!)  lol 

I love the collision of opposite genres in these, the classical sound of symphony and hard biting sound of metal…uh yep, sounds just like me! ;) 

http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=JeiSjzL2oQ8&amp;feature=related 

http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=erPnyi90cIc&amp;feature=related  

Oh and look at what the boy made me do…he wanted a picture of his x-rays before we brought them to his therapist and I get a *sssshiver* running through me every time I see it.  Of course he thinks it’s cool and what not, but ugh! 

Well ok, maybe a tiny part of me marvels at the wonders of modern medicine and technology, but still…I guess it’s my mommy’s heart that won’t let me look at it without grinding my teeth. 

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v298/Sylphe/Artsy%20Stuff/Broken.jpg 

*sigh* 

And now I shall impart a pearl of wisdom before I leave…(nevermind that I found said pearl whilst reading in the bathroom) hahaha that sounds so sick! 

*snortgiggle* 

Ok, ok, sorry…I’m so full of myself tonight, here goes: 

The key to happiness is to remain flexible and open-minded.  In this way we are always open to new ideas and new experiences and, at the same time, we have a deeper appreciation of what we have. 

and… 

Friendships and love affairs all come and go.  But if you want something to last you give deeply of yourself.  You must dig down into the very deepest part of your soul and offer forth the shining pearl that you are. 

hmm…I gave away ‘my pearl’ once, and now all I’m left with is this empty gold mount for a pendant that just clashes with everything I wear, you know? 

Hah! ok, that’s enough wisdom from me… 

G’nite~

my son asked me as he walked into the room where I was putting some finishing touches on my last piece of artwork. 

LOL

"Why are you always drawing nakid women?"

"Because I'm an artist and I love the human form," I answered the child. 

"I draw men too you know"

"Well draw more of them!" he retorted...

Heh!  What a kid. Reminds me that I’m going to have to have a talk with him soon. 

The difference with my oldest and this one is that the oldest used to watch Discovery Channel all the time and would see animals mating and such; naturally he got curious enough to ask questions.  So one day when he was about 8 I figured if he was old enough to ask, he was old enough to know the truth. 

He was disgusted of course when I told him about sperm being produced by the male body, and explained the human reproductive process, but at least he knew! 

My youngest is different, he pretty much lives his life on a ‘need to know basis’, but seeing as he just turned 12 I’m thinking it’s time for ‘the talk’. 

I don’t know how successful I’ll be, because he has a habit of just waving off the things he doesn’t want to hear, but it’s my job as a mom to make sure he doesn’t get his ‘sex ed’ solely from his peers ;) 

*sigh* a mom’s job is never done. 

I am delving into my next artwork as we speak (I still hesitate to call it such) and… 

*girlie squeals*  

My watercolour workshop is in just 4 weeks!! 

I am really getting stoked about it :)

*yet another petit girlie squeal of excitement* 

LOL I just hope I don’t totally bomb it. 

Oh well, I don’t care, I’m going into it looking for a new experience only…no expectations. 

I gave my last scrapbooking workshop on Friday night.  The girls were a bit disappointed, but overall I have the feeling that I need to move on.  It’s just another chapter of my life that needs to be completed.

~~~~ 

Not As We lyrics
Alanis Morissette

Reborn and shivering
Spat out on new terrain

Unsure unconvincing
This faint and shaky hour

Day one day one start over again
Step one step one
I'm barely making sense for now
I'm faking it I'm pseudo making it
From scratch begin again but this time I as i
And not as we

Gun shy and quivering
Timid without a hand

Feign brave with steel intent
little and hardly here

Day one day one start over again
Step one step one
with not much making sense just yet
I'm faking it til I'm pseudo making it
From scratch begin again but this time I as i
And not as we

Eyes wet toward
Wide open frayed
If God's taking bets
I pray He wants to lose

Day one day one start over again
Step one step one
I'm barely making sense just yet
I'm faking it til I'm pseudo making it
From scratch begin again but this time I as I
And not as we 

~~~~ 

Heads up to John who turned me onto Alanis Morissette’s latest album, Flavors Of Entanglement, I absolutely LOVE it!  But then again I always did think that Alanis was a kick-ass Canadian chica ;)   

I saw her live when she opened for the Dalai Lama in Ottawa back in 2004, and would love to go see her in concert.   

Hmm…looks like she’ll be in Ottawa for Canada Day!  Damn I wish I’d known that before just now looking it up, I might have made arrangements to go see her. 

June 29/08 Movistar  Tent -Barcelona, Spain 

July 1/08   Ottawa, ON Canada 

July 3/08  Quart Festival-Norway 

July 5/08  Annexe-Stolkholm, Sweden 

July 6/08  SwedenCity Festival-Sundsvall, Sweden 

July 7/08  Midtfyn Festival-Denmark 

July 7/08  Circus Krone Munchen-Munchen, Germany 

July 8/08 Berlin Tempodrom-Berlin, Germany 

July 9/08 CCH-Hamburg, Germany 

July 10/08 Open Air am Tanzbrurnnen-Koln, Germany

July 11/08 Montreux Jazz Festival-Switzerland 

July 12/08 Piazzo Duomo-Brescia, Italy 

July 13/08 TBA-Palmero, Italy 

July 31/08 Egan Center-Anchorage, AK 

Aug 8/08  Monaco Sporting Club-Monte Carlo, Monaco 

Aug 9/08  Colmar Wine Fair Festival-Colmar, France 

Aug16/08 Hylands Park Chelmsfort-Hylands Park,England

Aug 17/08  Weston Park-Shiftnal, England  

~~~~ 

Oh well, there will be other opportunities I’m sure. 

Someone is setting off fireworks and the dogs are going crazy, I better go comfort them.

~~~~ 

Happy 141^st Birthday Canada!!!

Ugh...

I hate the task of writing up a resumé.  It's right up there with interviews!  Actually I've been to enough interviews to find myself a certain comfort level going in ;)  I'm just hoping to that I get that far.

I'm applying for a job that I know I am qualified to do, only I sort of don't meet all of the requirements...but I'm going on the assumption that they just may not find anyone in this area who does meet them all, therefore I should be in the running.  *shrug* I've got nothing to lose by applying.

It would involve commuting once again.  Though I put that behind me a few years ago, I supposed I'd be willing to do a 45-minute commute to get there.  It's still better than the hour and a half I used to drive every morning and night for 5 years, right?  Right.

Great pay, good benefits, plus it's definitely something I'd enjoy doing for the rest of my working life, as I've done it before, and absolutely LOVED it! :)

~~~~~~

Today was even worse than yesterday...I can't say as I remember when I last had such a bad flare-up.  I'm just a big ball of ouch...like I might have gotten run over by a truck sort of ouch :( 

I'm just hoping I can sleep a little bit tonight... Je suis tired. 

~~~~~~

Wish You Were Here

Pink Floyd

So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell,
blue skies from pain.
Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?
And did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?
How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have you found? The same old fears.
Wish you were here.

/.end the boring'est post EVAR!

Bonsoir~

My little hatchling’s 12th Bday Party thing went well, I mean if you call a dozen water balloon or water gun-laden boys running amok, practicing their battle cries & ambushes or going at a Chopper piñata with a baseball bat and accidentally getting whacked in the head, tracking mud, cake and whatnot from one end of the yard and house going well….mm hmm, you get the picture ;)

Boy am I glad THAT’s over. And I had to push for it to be over too, as it turned into a sleep over and there were kids here till almost noon the next day.

I was seriously considering eating my young at that point, and the young of other alligator moms as well!

The kid got a new fishing rod, tackle box, loads of fishing paraphernalia as well as $310 in cash…What a haul!

I want a party too! With a Western theme (heh! insider joke) and I want me a cowboy!

~~~~

First it was snow, heaping piles of it, and now I’m just really sick of this incessant rain…We’re getting shafted, AGAIN man!

*Ponders a move*

I just hope the entire summer doesn’t pass us by and we have no nice warm days to show for it.

"The best thing one can do when it's raining is to let it rain."

-Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

(unfortunately it's also 'raining in my bones' :(  I'm in the midst of a wild flare-up and got about 3 hrs sleep last night)

~~~~

The Boy wasn’t too happy when I told him I was hitting the job market pretty hard in the next little while. He loves having his momma at home, and for a child who’s been in daycare since the age of 2, I guess I can understand it. But really, what does a 12-yr old need mom around for much? ;)

As for the big boy, he’s getting around much better these days, even able to manage with one crutch so I’m thinking he’d be able to manage without me at home too.

Well, I best get working on that resume…Ta~

Hmm ok, so I couldn't just go to bed, it was too early. I *did* work on my piece, and well...

"a rose by any other name would smell as sweet" told yas I could see something very different ;)

Tis still a work in progress (I need to fix her mouth & stuff) but I'm excited about this piece

Buée

9" X 12"

140 lb. Stratmore cold press paper

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v298/Sylphe/Artsy%20Stuff/Bue3.jpg

It 'feels' right. /

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v298/Sylphe/Artsy%20Stuff/Bue4-1.jpg

Lemme know what you think! :) Ok now for real....g'nite~

Despite the pissy weather, the teachers decided to take the kids camping.  We did get multiple sunny breaks with intermittant drizzles throughout the day however, but tonight is going to be a chilly one, especially near the lake.  But I'm not too worried, I made sure to pack extra socks & sweatshirts.

I just came back from the campground, I had to go pick the boy up for his soccer game, which was forfeited, so it's chalked up as a win for them, and then drove him right back out there to get settled in for the night...as 'settled' as it's going to get that is, with 6 little boys sleeping in one tent. 

Heh! glad I'm not out there ;) 

I was only standing there for about an hour and already the humidity is playing havoc with me, I can't seem to shake it.  Maybe I need a hot bubbly bath and a cup of tea to hit the spot...mmm yeah...that's sounding heavenly right about now.

The kids were running around throughout the campground, and were already started in the marshmellow stashes.  Also greatful I won't be there when the sugar rush kicks in the 50 or so kidlets!

Ah well, it's all in the name of a fun experience, the kids LOVE the yearly outing, I'm glad they get to take advantage of our little diamond in the ruff, as our local campground truly is one of the most beautiful you'll find in our province.

I did get to snap a few pictures.  Though the boy forbade me to, as he always does, but mom rules the roost, so you know...tough noogies kid!  This is his last little camping trip with his school anyway, my baby is going to high school in the Fall

*waaaaaa*

Ok, I'm over it.  I haven't been preening those wings of his for nothing yanno ;)

Bath!

Bed!

G'nite~

I got a phone call from my little goober saying I didn't have to pick him up in the neighboring town where I dropped him and his friend off this morning, as he'll be catching a ride home with another friend's mom who accompanied them on the trip, and who's mobile he was using to say they were about to leave Montreal about 4 hours ago.

It was nice to have the evening to myself.  I dropped the big boy off at a friend's house and it was just me and the girls (the Lhasas) 

I worked on this:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v298/Sylphe/Artsy%20Stuff/Bue-1.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v298/Sylphe/Artsy%20Stuff/Bue2-1.jpg

(hope the link works, as I had probs uploading the pics) 

Now when I look at this background one way, a rose begs to be drawn, but when I look at it another way...well, I gotta tell you, I see something very different ;) 

Perhaps I will superimpose the two for an interesting twist.  I will probably mess the whole thing up, but if I do, I will simply start over.

I do like the way it turned out so far.

I don't know if you can tell, but I am very much enjoying playing with these crayons and learning how they work.  And lucky, or should I say unluckily for you, I don't mind showing/subjecting you to my learning process! lol

Some song lyrics:

I'm Gonna Sit Right Down And Write Myself A Letter lyrics

I'm gonna sit right down and write myself a letter
And make believe it came from you
I'm gonna write words, oh, so sweet
They're gonna knock me off my feet
Kisses on the bottom
I'll be glad I've got 'em

I'm gonna smile and say "I hope you're feelin' better"
And sign "with love" the way you do
I'm gonna sit right down and write myself a letter
And make believe it came from you

I'm gonna sit right down and write myself a letter
And make believe it came from you
I'm gonna write words, oh, so sweet
They're gonna knock me off my feet
Kisses on the bottom
I'll be glad I've got 'em

I'm gonna smile and say "I hope you're feelin' better"
And sign "with love" the way you do
I'm gonna sit right down, write myself a letter
And make believe it came from you
And make believe it came from you

The boy's home!  He went on all but three of the rides apparently and paid $5 for a great 'action' snapshot of him and his group on one of the water rides.  I'm so glad he did!  Definitely fodder for the scrapbook.

He bought me a mood ring *motherly beaming*  apparently I am now 'somewhat relaxed'  heh! perhaps it has something to do with my young chick being safe in the nest once again ;)

Time for bed, we've got a camping trip to pack for in the morning!

Bonsoir~