Juuhachi-gou flopped her suitcase down on the bed, scowling at the bright yellow bedspread. The entire room was done in yellow, with vivid sunflower wallpaper and a soft lemon colored chair that looked as if it would swallow you up if you sat in it. She placed her hands on her hips and stared around the room. It was sickeningly cheerful. It was so bright in contrast to her mood that it made her want to spit. And of course, Bulma had unwittingly assigned her and Kuririn to the same room.

Not a chance! She huffed, as she clipped open her suitcase and pushed it open, watching to make sure that her perfect manicure wasn’t ruined. As if I am actually going to sleep in the same bed as him. He will just have to sleep in the hallway. Or in the damn kitchen for all I care. Just as long as he stays away from me.

Her neatly folded clothes stared back up at her, blatantly reminding her of their argument. She began tearing her clothes out of the suitcase, throwing them on the repulsive bedspread with more force than necessary. Shoes and clothes went flying everywhere, falling on the floor and around the room. Juuhachi-gou paused for a moment, then picked up the suitcase and turned it over, dumping everything out at once. Muttering to herself, she grabbed an armful of clothing and headed towards the small dresser next to the bed. She opened it with her free hand and shoved the clothes in there, not caring that they were most likely going to be wrinkled later. She slammed the drawer shut with a resounding bang and turned to glare at the rest of her clothing, scattered about the room.

Footsteps in the hallway broke her attention away and she turned to the doorway just as Juunana-gou entered, holding a bright red apple in his hand. He paused for a moment, looking around the room with the same disgusted expression adorned on Juuhachi-gou’s face. Obviously yellow was not his color either. When he noticed Juuhachi-gou’s clothes strewn about the room, he leaned against the wall with his arms crossed, a smirk spreading across his handsome face.

“Angry about something?”

She turned away from him and crossed her arms as well. “What do you think?”

He straightened up and stepped towards her, his face menacing. “I think we should have a little fun with the guy. He’s gotten a bit stronger since the last time we had an inclination to fight him. It’s the best way to get rid of that fury, Juuhachi.” He grinned, and took a bite of his apple. “Use it on someone else.”

Juuhachi-gou stared down at the floor. She hated it when Juunana brought up the past. What was perhaps worse --- he didn’t even seem to mind the fact that the two of them had done what they did. When she heard about the future version of herself and her brother terrorizing the earth to near extinction, she was not that surprised. Juunana-gou had an almost obsessive penchant for violence, and she knew that if she hadn’t of settled down with a family, she probably would have gone along with anything that he proposed. The thought of that scared her. It seemed like the desire to kill was always pulsing in her, hidden deeply, yet still there. Whenever their former destruction was brought up, that desire grew stronger, as if she could recall her muscles and tendons coming to life again, landing a kick in someone’s side that was so strong it could break bones. There really was nothing like the satisfaction of a battle, and the physicality of it absolutely thrilled her. Sure, she had participated in the fighting tournaments, but it wasn’t the same. Fighting to win and fighting to kill were two very different things, and she was afraid that one day, winning wouldn’t be enough for her.

Still, she had shared this with no one, and she wasn’t about to. “Juunana, we aren’t like that anymore. There is no reason to cause any harm.”

He leaned closer to her, and waved his apple about in the air. “You mean you don’t feel it? I know you must. We might have ‘changed our ways’, but it is still there.”

Juuhachi-gou sneered and bent over to pick up another armful of clothes. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Just because you have a family now does not mean you aren’t a killing machine anymore. We were created to kill and every single part of us is structured to perfection just so that we can accomplish that.” Juunana-gou informed her simply. “Gero didn’t create us to be parents or to be lovers, to be friendly and kind. He created us so that we could carry out his demands. What he instilled in us just isn’t going to flutter away after a few years or wear down each time you smile. It’s always going to be there. You can hide it all you want Juuhachi, but if I feel it, you can feel it too. We are what we are, and nothing can change that.”

“All right!” She consented. “Hai, I still do feel that way sometimes. You’re right, he did create us for the sole purpose of killing, but we didn’t! We managed to stop ourselves, and now we can manage to conceal the urge --- the rest of the world does not have to know that we still have a hidden desire to kill. I should think that my will power is strong enough to withstand the impulse to slaughter someone.”

He met her eyes quickly, blue matching blue. “But what if it isn’t?”

She paused, the clothes still in her arms, staring at him. “It is.”

“What if it isn’t?” Juunana-gou pressed, and he tucked a stand of dark hair behind his ear. “Do you realize how little we know about ourselves? What if one day we both just...start killing again? Our future selves never even stopped.”

Horrible images began passing through Juuhachi-gou’s mind. She couldn’t begin to think about that now, not when she had a family and a life. What would happen if she woke up one day and the impulse to kill was just too strong? Would she kill Kuririn? Or Kami help her....Marron? She felt short of breath suddenly, thinking of all that could happen. Somehow, she had to change. She had to become normal.

Surely I could. She thought. If only we could figure something out....There has to be some way to change. We were normal, once.

As if reading her thoughts, Juunana-gou suddenly spoke up. “Do you ever....” He trailed off, losing courage, then started again, “Do you ever think about the past? What we were before we were....this?”

Some days it seemed as though that was all she could think about. She jokingly called them her “dark days”, when she was questioned by Kuririn or Marron about her quietness. Not that she usually wasn’t quiet enough, but on those days....She barely said a word. Her mind was so consumed with wonder, that she couldn’t even bring herself to join back into reality. Where had she come from? What had her name been? Did she have parents? Friends? She wondered what she used to be like....If she had loved to shop as much as she did now, or if she had been as quick to anger. And the more pressing question, was the mystery of Why. Why had she and Juunana-gou been selected as Gero’s victims? Was life really just that cruel?

She and Juunana-gou had never shared any of this with each other. They both knew that it was on their minds, but neither one was ever brave enough to speak up. She smiled ruefully as she opened the dresser drawer. She had always thought that she would be the one to finally bring it up, but obviously Juunana thought about it just as much as she did.

“Hai.” Juuhachi-gou murmured quietly. “Always.”

“I bet I was a real nightmare of a kid.” He said, his eyes gleaming devilishly. He twisted the apple around in his hands, fingers so strong that they could crush it to nothing, softly moving over the smooth red surface. “And I bet you were annoyed with me all the time. Our parents were probably glad to get rid of us.”

“What if they weren’t?” She questioned. “Maybe they searched for us for years, and thought that we had just been killed?” She pushed the armful of clothing into the drawer, and tried to pack it all in.

Juunana-gou’s expression darkened. “Well I’m sure they say us on the news, eh? The wonderful son and daughter that they had been so proud of? Those same bright blue eyes that used to be so loving and innocent suddenly clouded over with hate? Their children suddenly cold hearted murderers?”

She slammed the drawer shut and turned to face him, seething. “I am not a cold hearted murder!”

“Hai. You are. We both are.” He grumbled darkly. “And we always will be.”

“Baka!” She cried. “No! I am not going to be that way!” Her eyes flashed. “I will be normal again. I will. Now get out of my sight. You’re making me angry.”

He took another bite of the apple, raising his eyebrows at her, and then turned, heading out the door. “Iie, You’re making yourself angry, Juuhachi. The fact that you want to be so different is driving you nearly insane. What Kuririn said was just a simple remark, but it made you nervous, admit it. That’s why you’re so angry. You don’t want to be just a machine, but you know you really are.”

She turned away from him quickly, crossing her arms and frowning. She felt as though he had just slapped her in the face. He’s right.

He felt guilty suddenly, seeing her like that. They might just be machines, but they had been through a lot, and whenever she was hurt, Juunana-gou felt the pain too. Whatever they had gone through to become the monsters that they were now, they had gone through together. If anyone held the key to his past --- to his life, it was her.

He spoke to her, his face a little softer. “I know you want to be different Juuhachi, and maybe I do too.....” He paused. “But it isn’t possible. I just don’t want you to get your hopes up and then find out that Gero’s programming irreversible.”

“I am not getting my hopes up.” She argued calmly. “I am just trying to find out who I am.”

He smiled at her, his handsome face mirroring her own. “I hope we both do someday.”

He took a final bite of his apple, then tossed it into the bright yellow trashcan at his feet and walked slowly out the door. Juuhachi-gou watched him leave, and then moved to shut the door after him. She contemplated his words for a few moments, not quite sure what to think. One part of her was feeling defeated, ready to give up and move on, and the other part --- the larger part --- was ready to change.

Change….She thought, glancing at herself in the mirror. In the reflection, she looked polished and elegant, like a painted doll wearing a raspberry colored turtleneck and dark slacks. Although she looked wonderful, she didn’t look human. She was too perfect, too beautiful. Staring at herself mad her want to out the shine in her light hair, to tear the emotionless expression off of her flawless face. She would do anything, absolutely anything to be normal.

With a sigh, she picked up a pair of jeans off of the floor and began searching through the drawers for a more comfortable shirt. Her mind drifted off again, imagining what life would be like if she could cry, or if she could laugh with abandon like the other women that she knew.

She’d like to think that she could figure it all out on her own, but she knew that she didn’t have the experience to do that kind of mechanical work, let alone on her own body.

But….She thought, as she changed out of her nice clothes and into a long sleeve tee shirt and the jeans. I know someone who does.

Chapter 24
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