01/04/24
Dear Diary,
"One look in your eyes...I knew we two would alwayz be together...And there are, 3 little words that say it all...I love you...Girl I realize ...That I wanna be with you forever...So say those 3 little words I wanna hear...I love you"
The words to one of my favorite songs was playing on my answering machine. I had came home around seven am on January 3,2024. It had been along night and morning. The prior night was a blurr. All I remember was breaking with my boyfriend of two years. Thinking back on what happened the night before are slowing coming to me.
I was at a popular club in Tampa with my friend Carla and her boyfriend Alex, while I was with my boyfriend, Nick. We were having fun, hanging out, relaxing, talking, have a few drinks and dancing. It was around 300am, when we had decided to leave and head home. Earlier in the night there was a altercation that involved Nick but he walked away from it, but the other people kept egging him on and eventually the cops were called and we settled, but four of the guys were arrested. We were leaving the club and in the cars when a person started to talk to Nick, I got out talking to Alex and Carla. Before I knew it, Nick was in handcuffs in a squad car but released. Then before I knew it, his lawyer came down to his house and we all talked.
His lawyer had told him that it was best to stay out of sight. He said had said that it was best we don't see eachother. Nick asked how long, he said until the court date is over. which is over two months.But he showed Nick something about us. There was a popularity poll going, before we had started dating Nick's popularity rate had gone down by 35%. I looked at him then at the poll, back at his lawyer, got up, gathered by things and tried not to cry. Nick had asked where i was going, I had said to him that popularity poll was right, that I should be out of his life with everything going on, before he said anything else, I kissed him good bye and left.
I remember getting into my car, looking out my window with tears coming to my eyes, but our song came on. I found myself at the beach where we went so many times. Everywhere I looked, touch and saw reminded me of us especially him. I had started to wonder if I had made the right decision. I stayed at the beach for half the day, watching the waves, couple with their families, friends having fun. I had heard my phone go off and looked down and saw Nick's number pop up five times. I knew why he was calling but I couldn't talk to him.
I got home that same day, got the mail, through it on the table, turned the radio on and playing was, When I See You Smile by Uncle Sam. Next to the radio was a picture of Nick and I taken just last week. I went into my bedroom, pulled out something to wear and came upon one of his shrts he left behind, held it and began to cry. It was two night prior when he stayed and made love. I got in the shower and cried harder then composed myself and got ready for the rest of the day. I stayed home for the rest of the day with my answering machine picking up calls. I just had CDs playing the whole time and fell asleep until like six pm.
I heard a knock on the door and went to answer it. When I opened the door I found flowers on the door step and it was red and white roses with a red carnation in the middle. I looked out over the rail of the apartment and saw Nick's Durango pull away. I realized I missed him but I had to stuck to my decision.