Written by Czar Fruitcake
SUMMARY: Piper’s slapping spree continues...you asked for it, you got it.
Piper was lying on the couch resting after a hard but satisfying morning of slappage. She was in a surprisingly good mood but her palm was starting to ache a little. All of a sudden, Phoebe walked in wearing nothing but a hot pink sparkly bikini and a wooly pink hat. Piper jumped off the couch and ran to tackle Phoebe to the ground.
“Hey!” Phoebe exclaimed in a high-pitched voice.
Piper ignored her and swung back her hand, relishing the moment. THWACK! She smacked Phoebe upside the head so hard that the little wooly pink hat went flying across the room and Phoebe became temporarily cross-eyed.
After a moment, Phoebe regained what little wits she had, uncrossed her eyes, and looked at Piper with big tears streaming down her pathetic face. “What are you doing Piper?” she asked crossly.
Piper smacked her again. “I’m smacking you upside the head,” Piper replied pleasantly.
“Why?!” asked Phoebe, cringing as Piper swung back her hand again.
Piper paused, leaving her hand midair. “For starters, why are you such an incredibly skanky dresser? And what is with the pink wooly hat? It’s as if you think it will magically give you some sort of brain, and then you can feel validated as more than the pushy queen of slut town. ‘I’m not a demon loving/hating ho, I’m wearing a pink wooly hat.’ Hate to break it to you sweetheart, but the pink wooly hat really just says, ‘I’m a skanky ho wearing a pink wooly hat.’” Piper smacked Phoebe one last time and then exited the room and headed for the kitchen. She was in the mood for making chocolate cake.
As she entered the kitchen, she whistled a happy song, and her eyes glowed a bright white glowy blue. She rubbed her stomach and started baking.
OKAY GUYS… the slapping is just starting, keep the requests and reviews a-coming, and remember, just because we’ve already smacked Phoebe doesn’t mean we can’t smack her again. Who’s next? You decide.