Written by Czar Fruitcake
SUMMARY: A new THWACKer is born…
Robbie was practically skipping as he entered the kitchen. The resounding THWACKS he delivered to Eric and Lucy still echoed in his head and he relished in the beautiful sound.
Encountering Ruthie kissing some unknown male, his hand began to once again feel the urge to THWACK. Luckily Ruthie spotted him before he was able to hit her. “Robbie!” she exclaimed. “What are you doing out of bed again? You weren’t just about to THWACK me, were you?” she eyed him suspiciously.
Robbie quickly pretended he needed to scratch his head and offered her an innocent expression. “Um, uhhhh… well, aren’t you a little young to be having a boyfriend?”
Ruthie looked at him as though he had just suggested that Lucy was sane. “You do remember that aside from Happy, I’m the most mature member of this entire extended household? I suggest you THWACK yourself for that comment, Robbie.”
Robbie contemplated a moment, pausing to strike a look-at-me-I’m-sexy-cuz-I’m-thinking look at the camera, and then mumbled, “I guess you’re right.” THWACK! He hit himself upside the head as best he could. POOF! He vanished completely, leaving a peanut butter sandwich sitting on the floor in his place.
The little blond boy who had been kissing Ruthie looked perplexed. “Where did he go?”
Ruthie rolled her eyes. “Who knows? Members of our household disappear without explanation quite frequently.” Seeing the terrified expression on the poor boy’s face, she instructed him, “eat that sandwich, Peter,” before going off in search of her victim.
Meanwhile…
Robbie suddenly found himself in a strange place filled with puffy clouds and snowflakes. “What the…?” he said out loud.
“Hi Robbie!” Mary called out, running up to him and kissing him.
“Hey!” yelled Joy, who was dancing with some plot bunnies.
“Where am I?” Robbie asked.
“Where all the leftover 7th Heaven characters go when they’ve left the universe of the televised show,” Matt responded, barely looking up from the Idiot’s Guide to Medical School book that he and Sarah were studying.
“If you’ve got plot bunnies following you around, it means you disappeared without any explanation more that a couple of muttered words,” Jimmy Moon added without looking up from the card game he was playing with a bunch of Lucy’s exes.
Robbie glared down at the grinning pink bunny hovering at his ankle, stalked over to Matt and Sarah and THWACKed them both. “You’re not really in medical school,” he informed them. “You just wanted to leave the show, so why are you studying?! And you,” he said, turning to Mary in her skanky flight attendant outfit. “You left the show to go to school at Tufts. You’re not really a flight attendant!” THWACK.
Then Robbie THWACKed the rest of them. Just for fun.