I keep on getting asked what its like to be transsexual, and told that I am so brave to do this. so I thought that I would do a sort of FAQ

What is it like to be Transsexual?

The only way that I can answer that is to ask you a question, what is it like to be 'normal'? What do I have to compare being transsexual with. All I do know is that I have had great pleasures and great troubles, mostly in equal measure. No more and no less than anybody else. All my non trans friends have had troubles to cope with of their own, different but no less.

The one quantifiable difference that I can think of is; the knowledge that you really are different and to tell anyone really is different is dead. The isolation that being transsexual brings is very real.

Am I brave to change sex?

Absolutely not! I have had a lifetime to get used to the idea. I had no choice in the matter, it was change over or self destruction and the nut house. When your choices boil down to one then making the decision is easy. The right time to change is when you have no other choice, if you have any other choice then it is not the right time.

Ok, so who is brave when you change sex?

Your partner. if they stay with you. You have to remember that your dream is their nightmare and the destruction of their dreams, security and future. I told my partner about my being transsexual when I first met her so although she has found it difficult to cope with, she still does find some things difficult, but that's life and I know that she will never see me as a woman.

Any advice to someone coming to terms with transsexualisum?

Accept and embrace your fate, If you truly are transsexual then there is no escaping  from it, so you might as well get to love the idea. It will make your life much easier. Don't rush anything.

Will it make my life easier?

No it will not, In many respects it will make my life more difficult, in some cases much more difficult.

Ok, so what have I got out of changing sex?

Peace of mind. For the first time in my life I am at peace with my self. That peace of mind is a prize worth almost any price to me. I have had a temporary peace before but being transsexual always shattered that peace. The cycle of peace and torment seems to speed up as you get older

Any advice to a couple with transsexualisum in the relationship?

Honesty honesty and yet more honesty, preferably from the very start. Go as fast as your partner can cope with, but don't let things stall. Martyrdom is stupid sometimes it is best to be cruel to be kind. You have a duty to protect yourself as much as you have a duty to protect others. you can protect no one if you dont protect yourself.