Part One
"Spike? Are we there yet?" Buffy mumbled as she
slowly came awake. Prying her heavy eyes open, the first thing
she saw was a window.
A window with sun streaming through it.
Sitting up straight, the Slayer looked wildly around her,
taking in the wide seats, the other passengers and, finally, the
long, leather duster on her lap. She fingered the soft material,
her face turning from anxious to sad as the tears welled up in
her eyes.
"Good morning, Ms. Summers," a stewardess said,
stopping by seat number three where Buffy was located. "Can
I get you anything?"
"Where is…did you see the man I was with?"
Buffy asked her. "Kinda tall, white blond hair?"
The stewardess smiled softly. "I’m sorry, but he
stayed in Brazil."
Buffy pressed her lips together and nodded.
"Thanks."
"If you need anything, press the call button. There are
headphones in the pocket in front of you if you’d like to
listen to music. And any phone calls you’d like to make are
free."
Buffy nodded again, and turned to the window as the stewardess
moved off. She took a deep, unsteady breath, bringing the
familiar coat up around her neck, and let the tears fall. They
hit the leather without any noise, rolling down its surface as if
it were crying, as well. *You knew it wouldn’t work,* she
thought to herself, her eyes not seeing the white clouds that
billowed under the plane like a sea of fluff. *He’s a
vampire, you’re the Slayer, end of story.*
Shakily, she leaned forward to pull out the headphones,
plugging them into the slot on her armrest. Putting them over her
ears, Buffy pressed the different channel buttons until she found
some soft music. She leaned back on the seat and closed her eyes.
Looking back on the memory of the dance we shared
‘neath the stars above.
For a moment, all the world was right.
How could I have known that you’d ever say good-bye.
Buffy pictured him in the moonlight the first night at the
pool. It had caressed his pale skin, emphasizing his taunt
muscles, the leanness of his form. The shadows had deepened in
his cheeks, making him all the more beautiful, the light from the
moon glinting off his platinum blond hair. It was if he stepped
out of a museum, carved from the perfect white marble, as if each
detail were finely etched by Michelangelo himself.
And now, I’m glad I didn’t know
the way it all would end,
the way it all would go.
She remembered the way he had kissed her so tenderly the first
time, his lips meeting hers hesitantly, wary, ready to stop at
the slightest protest. They were cool, soft, yet strong as the
kiss deepened slightly. Her breath had caught in her throat, her
heart skipping a beat as his tongue brushed her lower lip, asking
for permission. When she responded, she had inhaled deeply, and
the pure maleness of his scent made her insides tighten, her
heart speed up.
Our lives are better left to chance.
I could have missed the pain,
but I’d of had to miss the dance.
His touch had been gentle yet possessive, tender yet strong as
he caressed her skin. His cool fingers had moved over her,
sending shivers along her spine. But when his eyes traced the
same path as his hand, her entire body tensed with anticipation,
with excitement, with desire.
Holding you, I held everything.
For a moment, wasn’t I the king?
It had been the single, most earth-shattering moment of her
life when he joined with her, his hard shaft filling her, moving
in her. Her body felt like it was on fire, each nerve ending
crackling with energy begging for release. Even in her limited
experience, she had known that that was how it was meant to be,
that was what the books wrote of, that was what the higher powers
intended when man and woman were created.
But if I’d only known how the king would fall.
Hey, who’s to say?
You know I might have changed it all.
When his blue eyes met hers, they burned with an intensity
that shook her at the core, sending her crashing over the edge.
Her whole body felt as though she’d dove into a freezing
lake on a scorching day. Starbursts of colors flew behind her
eyes as she squeezed them tightly shut, her muscles quivering,
her body melting into his. And when he gasped her name, her real
name, as he joined her in the abyss, it made her heart pound so
hard she had been afraid it would burst.
And now, I’m glad I didn’t know
the way it would end,
the way it all would go.
He had held her afterwards, his hand running lightly up and
down her arm, not wanting to break contact. They had crossed a
line that day from mortal enemies to something indefinable,
something more than just lovers. It showed in the way he had held
her smaller hand in his while they walked, the way his voice had
shook when he saw the shack on top of the cliff, the way he
possessed her when they’d returned to the pool.
Our lives are better left to chance.
I could have missed the pain,
but I’d of had to miss the dance.
She remembered the panic in his voice when the skin ripped off
her hand, the way he called out her real name, descending to her
side in an instant, as if he sprouted wings. She remembered the
way he screamed at her, hateful things, cutting to the heart of
her insecurities, all to try and save her life. Then afterwards,
the way he had cleansed and bandaged her hands, despite the
bloodlust that had to have been screaming inside of him.
Yes my life,
it’s better left to chance.
I could have missed the pain…
The kiss on the small plane, what was to be their last kiss,
touched her soul, making her want to deny that he was a killer,
that he was a demon, that it was her sacred duty to destroy him.
But he had taken the decision off of her hands, making what would
have been the hardest choice of her life, leaving her with
nothing but the memory of his touch, of his voice, of his cool
lips on hers…and his leather duster.
But I’d of had to miss the dance.
Buffy wiped the tears from her face, then removed the
headphones. She took a deep, shaky breath, picking up the air
phone on the back of the seat and dialing the familiar numbers.
"The library please," she said into the receiver.
"Hello, Giles? I’m on my way home."