Blah
Well I have come to a point in my life where I just can't hang anymore. I need something in my life that will make me happy. I have been searching and searching but I can't seem to find anything or anyone. I am at a draw with people I lose or I lose in both situations. I want everything and nothing at the same time.
I just don't knbow anything. I am so confused and I can't stop hurting myself. I am delibratly trying to kill my body. There is something inside of me that needs to go. I have a feeling that someone had purposely tried to hurt me. There are a few people I have in mind.
I guess I will never really know. I am lost in this world of Khaos. I was not built to handle all of lifes misfourtunes. I want to go back to being sheltered and safe.

Today
Just as it is there it isn't.

I hate people who are immature and have to be disgraceful to women. Its ok that we be put before then on the day of judgement. I guess it just proves that people are pathetic. Oh well. Oh mental note to people out there. Don't bother wasting your rude words on my blog. Show some dignaty.

Absent
I am over come with my emotions and there is no one to help me. No one know's how I really feel and no will because I can not tell anyone my true feelings because I can not commit to the way I feel. I will soon be going to my true home and I will be at ease their. I wish for just one day I could show those I love how I really feel. But that would only be one day in eternity. I would seem so short but would stay with me forever. I am nothing to those I care for and to the people who want to know me I am everything. I have shared my love with too many. The one's that have it kept it all to themselves and left me with nothing. I believe that that was the intent. I can not say that I am happy but I can not say that I have nothings so I will remain in the state of grey. Until someone might stumble upon me yet again like one person did. I can only hope that this time I will not be taken for granted and left with nothing in return. I want what I had. Even though that is impossible, I can still want it. I was left in this world alone because of a promise that was broken. I guess it was ment to be because apprently I am worth leaving for I must be nothing.

Change
Well I haven't been very clear lately to anyone or anything. I am well alone. I am attached to no other. I am single and doing pretty good. I have gained a spiritual knowledge and walk down many paths. I am growing and becoming what I was meant to be. I am different shall I say. I am not the same and it is nice.

ummm....
Well things have been good lately thanks too really supportive people and there kind words. Hopefully I will see things differently if I can help it. So yeah I have been out of school for a week now and it still hasen't hit me. Well I'm sure reality will cach up with this little fishy soon enough...unfortunitly. Oh well I guess Well I hope all is well.
-Charlene

The school year is over
My senior year is coming to an end tomorrow at 9:30am. I don't know what I am going to be doing in the next year. I wonder were I will be. Well here is my time to show the world who Charlene Schatz is and how she decided to change it.

none
Well lots of things have changed in my life. I am no longer a constant but an unpredictable variable in the world. Well I don't have anything new and exciting to talk about all there really is-is nothingness. I have passed each day by without thought or sense of the world around me. My wings are broken and I weep for the lost of all things sad.
-Charlene

hurt
I am really really really sad right now. And I don't have anything else to say...soo yeah

Ouch!
Getting your tonsils removed doesn't hurt. It is waking up. After fighting of several nurses and pulling of cords I remembered where I was and calmed down. Dan went with my mom and I. I was very glad to see his face as I was waking up. He fed me ice and has been taking care of me since monday. I managed to eat a grilled chesse sandwich today! Well I will check in soon.