Faith had managed to keep a low profile in every other aspect of the mission. Her only screw up had been bumping into Buffy, but they’d stayed apart while Faith had planned her move to intercept the Mayor’s little gift that would facilitate the body-swap. She’d wanted desperately to see Buffy again, but she knew it was better if they avoided each other. They’d come too close to impacting the timeline – almost acting on what they’d always felt for each other – and neither of them fully understood the risks.

Despite what they both obviously wanted, it was better to let sleeping dogs lie. Buffy had to go about her normal, everyday life – waiting for the Faith of her own time to wake up so they could fight, causing Faith to run to LA, and everything else to go on as before minus the swap. And Faith had to avoid making any more mistakes. They couldn’t afford this to go wrong. If she didn’t stop them swapping bodies, the spell Willow needed to do to call every slayer in the world wouldn’t work. The First would win.

She had to remain focused.

It was easier said than done, and Faith’s mind kept wandering, thinking about what Buffy had said to her after they bumped into each other. She also thought about the Buffy of her own time, realising that in essence they were the same person, though the Buffy of her time was so closed off she was impossible to read now. But now that Faith knew for sure that Buffy had indeed wanted them to be closer in the past, wanted more from their relationship. . .it explained a lot. It explained why Buffy was so scared to trust Faith, or to open up.

The headache the whole situation gave Faith stayed with her the few days she’d kept out of sight. She hadn’t thought this hard or this much in longer than she could remember. It wasn’t fun.

Buffy had always made her insane for one reason or another, and trying to cope with the idea of two of them from different times was almost too much. She found it much more difficult than she’d imagined she would. Willow owed her a lifetime of free pizza for this.

“Ok, Slayer,” Faith said to herself. “Time to make your move.”

She shrugged her shoulders, easing some of the tension in them as they loosened. This was her chance to shine, but if she messed up now she wasn’t sure how she’d be able to fix things. She couldn’t get this wrong.

After spending a few days watching the Mayor’s old house, his office, and his old friends and workers, she’d figured out just where the implement was that would cause the body-swap. He’d kept it safe with his head vampire Lucian, she was certain. She’d watched the vampire take the box from a lockup downtown. It had taken all her focus not to just leap out at him right then to grab it, but she had to switch it for a fake, not destroy it or make Lucian suspicious. He still had to deliver it to Faith after she emerged from the coma.

Lucian had taken it to his crypt – not exactly the safest place he could keep it, but vampires weren’t exactly the smartest creatures. For whatever reason, he’d removed it from the lockup early, giving Faith the opportunity to switch it before the night Faith awoke from the coma. Things seemed to be falling in to place nicely and Faith felt proud of herself for not screwing up totally.

All she had to do now was wait until Lucian left his crypt for the night, sneak in and switch the devices, then let everything play out as it should have. Once she was sure that things were unfolding the right way again, she would smash the orb that Willow had given her before she left. It would take her back to her own time, as long as nothing happened before she had a chance to do it.

She had faith that things would go to plan. That the Buffy of this time would let things happen the way they should, and when the device failed to swap them, Faith could get back to the future, unscathed.

The details still made Faith’s head throb, but she trusted Willow and her confidence was high.

Once Lucian had been gone from his crypt long enough, Faith snuck inside. She made sure no other vampires were in there, then searched for the gift the Mayor had left her. It didn’t take long and she pulled the box out from behind a coffin, holding it delicately in her hand as a plethora of memories bombarded her. This thing had caused so much hurt, so much trouble. If she had never used it they wouldn’t be in this situation. If she had never used it, she imagined things wouldn’t have gotten quite so beyond repair between her and Buffy.

Now was the time to change that, though it would never completely change of course. As Willow had explained, they’d still all remember the incident – swapping bodies – and everything that happened afterwards, but the new memories would be fused with them, a little brighter than the original timeline. Both memories would co-exist, still leaving the hurt, but also – Faith hoped – giving them something not quite so horrible to recall. If she could have safely wiped out the memory of swapping with Buffy, and all the things she’d done in Buffy’s body to hurt Buffy, she would have done it in a heartbeat. But she couldn’t do that, and Buffy would still have to know the horrible things Faith had done.

She pulled out the device, turning it around in her fingers. It seemed so fragile, but it had been so destructive. Putting it in her pocket, Faith put the fake in its place in the box. They looked identical. Nobody would guess.

Taking a deep breath, Faith left the crypt, her heart pounding and her muscles so tense she thought they were in danger of snapping. She hoped nothing would go wrong now.

“Well, you’re a fine specimen of. . .hmmm, you’re not what you appear to be are you?” A gruff voice came from behind Faith as she left the crypt and turned down a dark path in the cemetery.

She felt her spine tingling and her body tensed even more. Spinning, Faith came face to face with one of the weirdest looking demons she’d ever seen. He was huge, and ugly, and had pieces of metal embedded in his skin. She didn’t know a lot about what had been happening in the past at that time – too busy thinking about giving Buffy a little payback - but she was guessing this was Adam.

“Great,” she mumbled to herself.

She couldn’t risk fighting with him; this could make things very, very difficult indeed. Adam had been an important piece of the past, and she couldn’t interfere.

Faith turned to run, hoping she could lose him without anything too bad happening, but he was quicker than he looked. One of his big hands swiped at her, catching her across her lower back. He must have had claws, or something, as she felt her skin open and instantly start to bleed.

The cry that ripped from her lungs was purely instinctual. It hadn’t actually hurt that much, but her frustration at being caught added to the shock made her more vocal than was wise.

“Get the fuck off me,” she snapped, twisting out of Adam’s grip as he knocked her to the floor.

“But you’re an interesting specimen, I can’t possibly let you go,” he insisted, eerily calmly.

Faith used all her strength to push away from him, scrabbling on the floor as he got his meaty fingers around her leg. She was beginning to get pissed off. Punching him in the chest she realised she was no match for him alone; she had to break free and run as fast as she could.

Wriggling, like the way she used to do as a kid when the older boys would tease her and hold her down, Faith made it impossible for him to keep his grip. He was getting angry too, and she knew enough stories to be a bit afraid of this guy. Even Buffy hadn’t been able to take him on alone.

“Ok, enough,” she yelled, gritting her teeth.

With all her might she used both legs to kick out at him, pushing him off. As he stumbled back a little way she was able to regain her footing, standing and making a dash for it. To her surprise, she practically bumped right into Buffy just a short way down the path.

“Whoa!” they both gasped in shock.

“I heard you yell,” Buffy said, clearly out of breath. “I was at the other side of the cemetery; what’s wrong?”

The worry was clear in her eyes, and her hands were clutching at Faith, surreptitiously looking for injuries. She pulled one away to find it covered in blood.

“It’s ok,” Faith assured before Buffy could freak out, which it definitely looked like she was about to do. “Just a flesh wound, but we need to run.”

“From what?” Buffy asked. Just then, Adam came blustering through the undergrowth, a scowl on his mishmash of a face.

“Come on!” Faith exclaimed, grabbing Buffy’s arm.

“Wait, Faith,” Buffy stalled. “We could probably take him together.” Buffy’s eyes were full of hope, her head nodding enthusiastically. “He’s been terrorising Sunnydale, and we can stop him right now.”

“No, we can’t,” Faith said, pulling on Buffy’s arm as she tried to get her to run. Adam was getting too close for comfort. “I can’t screw with stuff like that; it’ll fuck things up in the future.”

Buffy’s mouth opened and closed as she looked from Adam to Faith. She wanted so badly to end Adam, right then and there. . .but Faith was right. For once, Faith was being the smart one.

“Ok, let’s run,” she agreed.

They didn’t waste any more time talking about it, getting the hell out of there so quickly Adam had no chance of catching them. When they were sure Adam was no longer following they ducked out of the cemetery and headed, without discussion, towards Faith’s motel.

Keeping aware and glancing left and right before entering, both slayers clambered into the motel room and took a moment to catch their breaths. Faith was still a little surprised that Buffy hadn’t challenged her more on the issue of Adam, but she was thankful that Buffy had listened for once and given up her need to be the one in control.

“That was a close one,” Faith gasped, still feeling the sting at her back and checking it out with her hand as Buffy closed the blinds at the window.

Sure enough, she was still bleeding.

“Let me take a look,” Buffy said, moving towards Faith, flicking on a small lamp as she passed it.

“It’ll be ok by morning,” Faith insisted.

Adrenaline was still coursing through Faith’s veins and she didn’t know if she could take Buffy being so close to her; not now that she knew for sure that Buffy was physically interested in her.

Buffy shook her head and moved behind Faith anyway, sensing the tension coming from Faith – of the sexual variety. It was difficult not to feel it, and she couldn’t help but want to react. Her fingers shook a little as she helped pull Faith’s jacket off. Adam’s claws had caught her on her lower back, just above her butt, taking a small chunk out of the leather but an even bigger chunk out of Faith.

“This needs to be cleaned,” Buffy said softly, almost not recognising her own voice as she reacted to the need she could feel from Faith.

“I’ll just take a shower and. . .” Faith stopped talking as Buffy pushed up her shirt, feeling it peel away from the wounds and the blood. She couldn’t help but hiss a little in pain.

“I’ll clean it, Faith,” Buffy told her. “I don’t want you going back to the future all beaten up; they’ll think I did it.”

Faith chuckled, hearing the joke in the way Buffy spoke. There was also a hint of regret there too, however, and she knew where that came from. They’d spoken a little about the past - at least the past that this Buffy was aware of – and it was obvious that they both wished things could have been different. That they could have worked out their differences and all the harm that Finch’s death had caused.

It was pretty much wishful thinking wanting to put it all right, however. The most they could hope for was a little more understanding.

“Sit down,” Buffy told Faith when Faith allowed her to pull up her shirt to reveal the wounds.

The claw marks weren’t too deep, but they’d need dressing at least. She was thankful that Faith didn’t argue, watching as the other slayer sat on the edge of the bed, waiting for Buffy to do what she wanted to do. This kind of easiness between them still surprised Buffy, even after the other day when she’d first stumbled upon ‘Faith of the future’ and they’d chatted quite openly and honestly – to a point.

She’d spent days wishing she could come back to this motel room to see Faith, to talk with her, and just enjoy being around her. But she’d wanted to respect Faith’s wishes, and she didn’t want to be the cause of anything going wrong with Faith’s mission. This was an extenuating situation, though, so she tried not to worry too much and went into the bathroom to get towels and a wet cloth.

Rooting around some more in the small bathroom, she found a first aid kit and brought it back into the bedroom with her, placing the things beside Faith and removing her own jacket.

“Adam’s a mean bastard, huh,” Faith stated, stretching her back experimentally. “Sorry we couldn’t take him on, B. Just can’t risk. . .”

“I understand,” Buffy interrupted. “It was stupid of me to suggest it.”

She gave Faith a reassuring smile and picked up the cloth she’d run warm water over. Faith turned a little on the edge of the bed, her head twisted just enough so she could see Buffy behind her. Gently, Buffy made sure Faith’s shirt wouldn’t drop down, pushing it up a little further.

“Want me to take it off?” Faith asked, hoping she didn’t sound as pleased as she felt at having Buffy’s fingers brushing against her skin. This couldn’t get complicated.

“Sure,” Buffy answered, knowing it was a bad idea, but not caring for the moment.

The very idea of Faith removing clothing for her was enough to make her lose a little of her sense. She just hoped she could keep control of her hands.

Slowly, Faith removed her shirt, throwing it to the bed and grumbling a little about the fact it was pretty much ruined. She had a bra on, but she felt almost naked as she noticed Buffy’s gaze wandering over her approvingly. Faith bit down the instinct to mock Buffy for it, preferring instead just to enjoy the moment rather than destroy it – she wouldn’t get any moments like this once she was back in her own time. For all she knew, Buffy could be even worse with her when she got back, due to the mix of memories – some of the body-swap, some of it not even happening. It surely wouldn’t hurt too much to bask in Buffy’s admiration for a few moments.

Tenderly, Buffy swiped Faith’s long hair out of the way, placing it over Faith’s shoulder, enjoying the soft texture of it before removing her fingers. She had to focus on Faith’s wounds, even though that was very difficult given the fact she just wanted to touch Faith everywhere.

Now that Buffy had come to terms with how Faith made her feel, it was like she could think of nothing else. Her hormones were going crazy; she’d even been avoiding Riley so she didn’t have to explain her frequent lapses in concentration. There was no doubt in her mind that if Faith was receptive to the idea she’d make a move on her. Buffy certainly wanted to.

Taking a breath to steady her hands, Buffy started wiping at the bloody claw marks, cleaning them as best she could before drying Faith’s back and grabbing the antiseptic cream beside her.

“This might hurt,” Buffy warned, impressed so far that Faith hadn’t flinched with pain already. She just sat there, letting Buffy take care of her, which made Buffy feel all kinds of fluttery in her stomach.

“Go for it,” Faith said, her voice deep and husky; clearly affected by the way Buffy’s skilfull fingers were touching her so gently.

She couldn’t help but be affected; she’d wanted this kind of attention from Buffy for as long as she could remember, and it was hard not just giving in to it a little. She knew she had to resist the temptation, but she suddenly felt so tired. So tired of fighting all the time. This was practically heaven, even though her wounds were stinging now.

“Just a little more,” Buffy said as she applied the cream, rubbing it in as softly as she could.

With one hand resting lightly on Faith’s shoulder, she wiped her fingers on the towel, removing the cream from them, and leaned down a little way to blow over Faith’s lower back. She knew from experience that it would sooth the stinging, if just a little. When she felt Faith shudder, she blew again, her own body reacting to being so close to Faith, knowing – sensing – that Faith was getting turned on.

“Buffy,” Faith practically whispered in warning, the desire in her voice making it a sensual sound that made Buffy instantly wet.

This was getting a bit too much for Buffy. Her body yearned for Faith in a way that was almost frightening. Hell, it had certainly frightened her in the past; enough to do all she could to dismiss it.

Trailing her fingers over Faith’s shoulder, Buffy swallowed, unable to find the strength to walk away. She leaned even further forward and placed a kiss just below her hand on Faith’s shoulder blade, taking a moment to enjoy the warmth of Faith’s skin on her lips. They both shuddered, but not from the slight chill in the room. She kissed again, several times, moving towards Faith’s neck as Faith began to breathe a little faster.

Close to losing control, close to turning around and taking Buffy in her arms so she could kiss her, touch her, lay her down and do all the things to her she’d always wanted, Faith tried to speak, to say “stop,” but she couldn’t. This was Buffy, and she’d wanted her so badly. She’d needed Buffy to care this way from the very start.

Tipping her head to the side so Buffy could kiss her neck more easily, she sighed as hands moved around to her stomach, touching her there with definite purpose. Her nipples were hard, straining against her bra, and she was wet and throbbing for Buffy. When she felt the tip of Buffy’s tongue flick out at her throat, travelling up towards her ear, Faith moved a hand back, grasping Buffy’s thigh and squeezing gently.

She really, really didn’t want to remember how much of a bad idea this was. She really didn’t, but she couldn’t help but think of Buffy in the future and how it could affect her. If she left too much of an impression on Buffy here with this, too big a ripple, god only knew what the consequences would be. She already knew it was going to be hard going back to her own time knowing now that Buffy had once had thoughts and feelings about her. She already had the prospect of having to keep that knowledge to herself when she got back, fearful that Buffy would just refute it causing the flimsy trust between them shattering to nothing.

There was no way she could let this continue.

Turning in Buffy’s arms, instantly seeing the desire in Buffy’s eyes and wanting to fall into them forever, Faith licked her lips slowly, about to remind them both why they couldn’t go any further. Unfortunately, Buffy wasn’t thinking quite as clearly and she leaned towards Faith, their lips meeting before Faith could stop it. Once Buffy was kissing her, she melted into her, instantly kissing back and forgetting what she’d turned to say.

Their mouths met slowly at first, lips delicately testing the water, but they soon let desire take control. Opening her mouth slightly, Buffy moaned at the first feel of Faith’s tongue against her own. She hadn’t planned on kissing Faith, but she was glad she had. She just knew that Faith had been about to say they had to stop, but Buffy wasn’t ready to stop. Not yet.

She loved the way Faith’s lips felt on her own, so soft, so full. This wasn’t like kissing a man, it was sexy and sensual and Buffy could feel her whole body reacting. Just the flick of Faith’s tongue against her own made her head spin and she didn’t want to stop. Moving her hands up into Faith’s hair, she kissed her deeper, twirling their tongues together as they pressed closer at the foot of the bed. The heat coming from Faith was intoxicating, and Buffy wanted to feel more of her. The little bit of skin she could feel just wasn’t enough.

Murmuring against Buffy’s lips, unsure if she’d told Buffy to stop or continue, Faith allowed herself to enjoy Buffy’s mouth with her own. They were in dangerous territory, but it felt so good. Buffy was a great kisser and Faith couldn’t help it when her hands pulled her closer, wanting Buffy against her. She was losing any control she had, falling into Buffy, leaning against her until Buffy toppled over onto the bed. It didn’t deter either of them and Buffy gripped Faith’s shoulders, stopping Faith from pulling away as they kissed hungrily, greedily now.

Their hearts pounded together in rhythm, bodies finding natural spaces and curves to settle into as hands tried to learn what they could, where they could. For so many years Faith had wanted this. For so many hurt filled, hateful, god-awful years, and here Buffy was. . .wanting what she wanted. Needing what she needed. It was almost too good to be true. Almost too right in the face of all that was wrong with it.

This had to end.

Faith pulled her lips away from Buffy’s with difficulty, fighting her deep desire to continue.

“Faith,” Buffy began, her breath ragged and her eyes searching Faith’s, “don’t stop. Please.”

With a sigh, Faith sat up again abruptly, running both her hands through her hair as Buffy sat up beside her. They’d come so close and Faith felt like a failure.

“We have to,” Faith managed to say, trying not to look in Buffy’s direction as she regained her control, as her lungs burned and her heart hammered in her chest.

A soft hand on Faith’s back made her want to cry in frustration. Why did Buffy have to be with her like this now? Why couldn’t this have happened long ago, before they’d broken beyond repair?

Faith’s heart ached and she needed air. She needed space to think, to breathe, to not feel Buffy crawling her way back inside her soul.

“I switched the device today,” she told Buffy, keen to get both their heads back in the game. “Things should run smoothly from here; you just have to be ready for the fight when I wake up from the coma.”

She heard Buffy sigh beside her, the hand dropping away. Hopefully the reminder that Buffy still had to act like she hated her – the Faith from then, that would wake up full of rage and pain – brought some perspective to what they’d just been doing. Hopefully Buffy realised how much of a bad idea it would have been to continue.

“I hate that we still have to fight,” Buffy said, almost a whisper.

“You can’t deviate from that,” Faith reminded, no matter what.

“I don’t have to like it.”

They fell into an uncomfortable silence and Faith suddenly felt the chill to the air; she didn’t have a shirt on of course.

Standing on slightly shaky legs, Faith crossed the room to her bag, pulling out a clean tee shirt and pulling it on. She winced a little from the pain at her lower back but she could already feel the wounds healing. Turning to look at Buffy, Faith shoved her hands into the pockets of her jeans. This was a little awkward, and strange, and not a predicament she wanted to be in. Her body was screaming for her to take Buffy, but her mind, her conscience, was telling her to keep her distance.

“You’ll let me know what happened? Call me, after the fight?” Faith asked, almost tripping over her words; her mouth felt suddenly lost without Buffy against it.

“Sure,” Buffy answered, looking down at her hands.

Buffy hated this. It had been so much easier with this Faith, future-Faith, or whatever it was she should call her. It had been so good feeling that bond between them, and feeling comfortable with her, but that was all but gone now. She knew she shouldn’t have kissed Faith – it was her fault they were feeling awkward now – but she hadn’t been able to resist. And she knew if Faith moved closer to her right now, she’d do the same again. She wanted more of Faith than she’d ever wanted from anybody.

But Faith was right. They needed to keep things how they were meant to be. They couldn’t risk losing themselves in each other – no matter how much they both wanted it – because soon. . .this Faith would be gone. Soon, Buffy would have to fight the Faith from her own time, pretending not to care, not to love, not to want what she’d always wanted. The very idea made her feel sick and she knew where she’d go after leaving this motel room tonight. She’d go to see Faith. Her Faith.

She’d walk down that stark hospital corridor alone, and say goodbye. She’d have to let her heart break so that life could go on as normal. So that the Faith standing before her went back home triumphant.

Getting to her feet, Buffy felt the lump in her throat and fought against it. She couldn’t cry in front of Faith; that would be unfair. She had to be strong.

“I’ll go now,” Buffy said, the emotion in her voice barely disguised. “I’m glad we . . .” A hot tear rolled down her cheek and she bit back the hurt inside her.

She knew she’d never see this Faith again as the way she saw her now. In the future, they wouldn’t have this memory. They wouldn’t have this time they’d spent together.

“I’m glad I met you,” Buffy said quietly. “Please, be safe.”

Faith just nodded, feeling her own heart breaking as much as Buffy’s. She swallowed hard, not wanting Buffy to see how much this was hurting her too. It had to be this way. The timeline had to remain true, meaning they had to ignore what they felt and what they wanted.