Search by Author - Television

Tom (to Helen): Don't apologize if you're right!
Mr. Jefferson: Right?! She called me a narrow-minded fool!
Tom: Well...?
"The Jeffersons"

There's no weapon as powerful as your femininity.
"La Femme Nikita"

In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king.
Kevin Arnold in "The Wonder Years"

My prince is out there somewhere. He's probably locked up in some foreign prison.
"Designing Women"

If you feed the bears, they'll come back for more.
"E.R."

Kevin, promise me you'll come visit me after you've won the Heisman Trophy and have a chain of car dealerships, and I'm still saving up for a second pair of pants.
teacher on "Daria"

I'm not in a good mood, I'm just between things that I'm mad at.
"Grace Under Fire"

Sometimes, the best thing I can do for you is nothing at all.
"Reba"

Grab a brain, a heart, and some courage, and meet me at the Emerald City.
"Kenan and Kel"

At some point, love alone doesn't make a relationship work.
"Seventh Heaven"

They can't give you six weeks and they can't take them away. You're not going anywhere until God wants you to.
"Seventh Heaven"

Dorothy: How was the wedding, Ma?
Ma: Beautiful, until the bride lifted the veil.
"Golden Girls"

You've got to take your shot.
Sam on "Cheers," in encouraging Diane to pursue a writing career

Am I looking forward to the Enron hearings tomorrow? No more than a kid going to the circus.
Jeff Greenfield, "Greenfield at Large"

Why do famous people always have to talk about their sex lives?
"The O'Reilly Factor," Bill O'Reilly

She's from the land of 10,000 men she cannot date.
Rendez-View

Okay, let's be organized. Make it fast, make it snappy, and if there's any impulse buying, make it chocolate.
"Gilmore Girls"

Loralei: By the way, I'm also a communist.
Rory: Oh really.
Loralei: Yes, because I look damn good in red.
"Gilmore Girls"

I don't make the rules; I just notify the proper authorities when they're broken.
Mr. Hill, "Cheers"

I have to go poke out my mind's eye.
"Frasier"

Drew: All I know is if it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, chances are you dated it and it ended badly.
Kate: Well if it walks like a girl and talks like a girl, chances are you asked her out and she said no.
"The Drew Carey Show"

We're almost there and nowhere near it. All that matters is we're going.
"Gilmore Girls"

Copernicus called, and you are not the center of the universe!
"Frasier"

If you can't have a good time with four dozen rubber inflated hands, you're just not tryin'.
"Cheers," Carla
In this episode, it is Frasier's birthday. He went to get balloons three times. The first two times, they were popped or flew away. The third time, the balloon shop was out of balloons, but a friend gave him a box of rubber gloves, that he blew up.

Life is so hard... Sometimes I think it is the hardest thing there is.
Chuckie in "Rugrats"
In this episode, he is to get his first haircut, and he is afraid. :)

Good looks open doors. Good hair blows them off their hinges.
"Cheers," Sam

I put the hot in hot tub.
Elimidate

It's not who you know, it's who I know.
"Cheers," Norm

You know, I think for the longest time, I was just waiting to find somebody I loved as much as I loved you. I realize that's not gonna happen, you know. You were my first love.
"Dawson's Creek," (season 4) Dawson to Joey

Joey: ... I know it's over. I just want to be your friend. ...
Pacey: You want to know what the truth is, Jo? I still love you, and I probably will love you for a very long time. But I can't just be your buddy. 'Cause, as much as I enjoy the concept of just being friends, in reality, it's a bizarre form of torture, and I'm just not willing to participate in it. So, right now, what I want to do is just move on and get over you, and the only way for me to do that is to not be around you anymore.
"Dawson's Creek" (episode 422), Joey and Pacey

If this day gets any better, by noon I'll be rolling in glass.
"Will and Grace"

Sheet music is like a language, the acquisition's the same. If you're not fluent by the time you're eight, it will always be a foreign language...
piano teacher, "Everwood"

You know, after my mom died, everyone told me that I was going to be okay, that it would take a little time, but I'd heal. That never happened. What you're feeling right now, it doesn't ever really go away, not completely. It's not like you're going to go back to being the person you were before they died. The person's gone. It's more like something inside of you breaks and your body finds a way to compensate for , like, if you busted your head... you might resist for a while... you have to learn all this stuff again, and nobody else does. Eventually your body takes over, and figures it out for you, and you're glad, because if it was up to you, you'd look at your busted head forever, trying to figure out what it was like before.
Efrem comforting Amy after Colin died, "Everwood"

The more things change, the more they stay the same. I'm not sure who the first person was who said that, probably Shakespeare, maybe Sting. But at the moment, it's the sentence that best explains my tragic flaw : my inability to change. I don't think I'm alone in this, the more I get to know other people, the more I realize it's kind of everyone's flaw. Staying exactly the same, for as long as possible, standing perfectly still, it feels better somehow, and if you are suffering, at least the pain is familiar. Because if you took that leap of faith, went outside the box, did something unexpected, who knows what other pain might be waiting out there. Chances are it could be even worse. So you maintain the status quo, choose the road already traveled, and it doesn't seem that bad, not as far as flaws go. You're not a drug addict, you're not killing anyone. When you finally do change, I don't think it happens like an earthquake or an explosion, where all of a sudden you're like this different person. I think it's smaller than that, the kind of thing most people wouldn't notice unless they look really, really close, which, thank God they never do. But you notice it. Inside, that world of change feels like a world of difference and you hope that it is, that this is person you get to be forever, that you'll never have to change again.
Efrem's monologue, "Everwood"

I can't keep being your second choice. Not when you're my first.
"Everwood"

People say they wanna know the truth about what happened to their long-lost brother or why their kid hates them or if their wife is cheating. But knowing only makes them unhappy. They don't really want the truth. They just want good news.
Phil the mechanic on "Everwood"

Go to sleep and dream of the tragedy, which is your life.
Archie Bunker, "All in the Family"

Quote Land
Search by Author