guitar.
david was born on a farm out west. his daddy was a former accountant that wanted to try a simpler life, to try to get back to his roots, although no one in his family that anyone knew of had farmed. david's daddy experienced a bad reaction to a gray hair he found in his beard one day when he was twenty-seven. his daddy had a chemical imbalance that made him think he couldn't live unless he moved to a farm out west. david's mother left a much-loved job as a registered nurse, packed up her belongings, and followed her husband several thousand miles west. she had chemicals inside her that made her think she couldn't live without david's daddy.
david has an older brother, daniel, who was three when david's daddy and mother obeyed their respective chemicals. daniel was five when david was born. david was literally born on the farm, inside his parents' bedroom, on the bed where he first came into existence one night. david's daddy's chemicals told him to want a totally natural experience. david's mother gritted her teeth, gathered her chemicals, and successfully brought david into the world without the aid of doctors or pain medication. david's daddy was in the room for the whole thing.
the family moved back the several thousand miles three months after david was born. he slept the entire flight home.
daniel joined soccer when he was ten. with david as a brotherly cheerleader, daniel spent the next seven years of his life perfecting his soccer skills, going to college on a soccer scholarship. daniel then made it to the pros. he insists on calling it "football" and he insisted that david call it "football" as well. the brothers are sworn non-fans of what football players and enthusiasts all over the world call "american football." daniel did not die in a boating accident during david's senior year in high school, but there was a five-year-old girl named emily that did across town. her mother went crazy and had to be put into an asylum and be given pills to control the chemicals inside of her that told her to shoot anyone she saw with the rifle that had belonged to her husband before he died in a plane crash three years earlier. daniel wasn't anywhere near a boat that afternoon when emily died.
david worked at the pet store downtown from the day he turned fifteen to when he left for college. during that time, he cleaned up three hundred pounds of parrot solid waste and saw rabbits copulate and reproduce exactly two hundred sixty-three times. fifty-nine of the baby rabbits were still born.
david loved the puppies best. at first though, he hated them because he had chemicals inside him that told him to be mortally afraid of them and also because puppy feces is the most difficult out of all animals to clean. the secret charm of puppies, which david learned soon enough, is that girls love them. david loved girls. the reasonable course of action is to love puppies himself.
once, david even made money selling three german shepards named "sam" to the store. the puppies belonged to his next-door neighbor and friend, jacob, who plays the keyboard in the steel puppies. david and jacob started a band themselves in high school called the purple polka dots that played small gigs in town.
david was only middling in what he and daniel called football, but his true ability lied in music. this was clear from the beginning when he joined band in middle school, playing the flute. he stayed in band during all of high school. he bought himself an acoustic guitar a few months after working at the pet store, and taught himself how to play it.
david majored in social science, and planned to be a social worker or teacher. he still plans to teach high school sometime in the future.
david has seen every single game daniel has played in because either he was there in person or he saw the game in its entirety on tape. david bought a puppy for daniel's twenty-fifth birthday that, by coincidence, daniel named "emily."
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