Chapter 18

The guys stood there, staring at Liz.  They knew she understood Nick and knew why he was acting this way.   “Come on girl, tell us what is going on.  You’re both scaring us.” Brian said.

“Look, it’s all my fault.  A long time ago, Heather gave me a letter to give to Nick.  I had no idea what was in the letter, all I was told to do was give it to him.  Honest, if I had known what Heather wanted to tell him, I would never have given it to him.” she rambled, not making sense to anyone else in the room.

“What the hell did she say?!” Kevin snapped, sick of dancing around the answers.

“Why don’t you read it for yourselves!” she said, throwing the letter at Kevin and the guys.

She ran off down the hallway to the elevator.  She had to get away, away from everything.

*** *** ***

The tension between everyone was overwhelming.  Nick was living in a nightmare, Liz felt out of place, and the rest of the guys just wanted things to be normal.

“Damn, I wish Heather hadn’t been so stubborn.” Howie muttered under his breath.

“What was that D?” AJ asked, as he took the letter from his friend.

“Nothing, just thinking out loud.” Howie answered.

AJ and Kevin read the letter, and sighed.   They knew that Heather was only trying to make things better for Nick, but little would she know that it was tearing him up inside, and destroying the man he was.  He had such a passion for life and for singing, until she died.  His eyes lit up every time he sang and knew she was watching.  And now, the only memory of their lives together was a book of short letters, and his daughter.

“Brian, go and find Liz, we need her here.  For some reason, she is the only person who can get through to him.” Howie said.

Brian ran down to the elevator in search of Liz.  The others sat outside Nick’s room, pleading with him to open up.

“Dammit Nick, just open the door!  Let’s talk about this!” Kevin hollered through the door.

“I don’t want to talk about it…especially with you!” he yelled, throwing something at the door.  With a thud, the guys looked at each other.

“This is NOT working.” AJ said.  “Where the hell is Liz?”

“I am right here AJ.” she answered softly.  Liz had come back with Brian, and walked slowly towards Nick’s room.  “Has he said anything?”

“Nope, just that he doesn’t want to talk to anyone.” Kevin said.

Liz stood at the door for a moment, and then tried the handle.  She knew it would be locked, but was hoping it wasn’t.  The guys sat there watching her as she ran her hands through her hair.  “Guys, you may want to leave.” she said quietly.

“NO, we are NOT leaving until he comes out.  We are not going to let him do anything stupid.” Brian quickly answered her.

*** *** ***

“I hope that Liz and the guys can talk some sense into Nick.  He has to find a way to move on.  Or this stress will kill him.” Leighanne said.

“I know, and not to mention the fact that they just started a new tour, they don’t need this shit right now.” Dee said.

Leighanne, Dee, Brianna, and Kat sat around talking about how things had gotten out of control.   Everyone’s lives seemed to be affected by Nick and his actions.  As much as they each wanted out of it, somehow they all ended up being a part of it.  Nick was the youngest of them all, and they felt as if they had to protect him.

“Well, something needs to happen soon.  The guys need to get back on the ball, or they will lose everything they have worked so hard for.” Brianna was quick to say.

“Yeah, but ladies, we need to give Nick his space.  If we don’t, he may just pull away from us all, permanently.  Didn’t we already see that he could do that?” she snapped.

All the while, Katie sat in the corner, playing with a doll that Leighanne had given her.

*** *** ***

“Look Nick, you can’t stay in there forever!  Just open the damn door already!!”  Liz screamed through the door.

The guys sat there with their faces buried in their hands.  They knew her little plan of “attack” wasn’t working.

“Nickolas, don’t make me break down the door…I can do it.  I mean it!” she continued.

“Like hell you could break down the door!” he yelled back.

“That’s it…I’m coming in!” she yelled as she threw herself at the door in hysterics.  Instantly she crumpled to the floor in pain.

Nick heard the crack and thud, and was suddenly frightened.  “Elizabeth!  Are you okay?!” he said through the door.

“What do you think, asshole?” she retorted.

AJ and Brian rushed to her side to help her up.  “Liz, I don’t think this is working.  Come on, we will just leave him alone.  He will have to come out sometime to go to the bathroom or eat, so, he can’t stay in there forever.” Brian whispered.

“No Brian, he has to realize that there are many people who care about him, and he needs to listen to us.” she whispered back.

Finally, after sitting there for a few minutes to catch her breath, she came up with another idea.  It was her last resort, and to be honest, she had no idea if it would work or not.  With the boys there, it could be harder for her to say what needed to be said, but again, she realized they wouldn’t leave without getting him out.

“Nickolas, I want you to listen.  Please.” she said softly.

“I don’t want to listen right now Liz, I want to be left alone.” he said with a sniffle.

“Heather loves you Nick.” she replied.

Without a second thought he blurted out, “Correction, she LOVED me. And then she threw that all away.” he said as tears trickled down his cheeks.

Liz sat there, not sure what to say next.  “Nick, she loves you and she always will.  She just didn’t want you to be alone.  Why can’t you see that there are so many people who love you and want you to get better?  Why are you being so stubborn?”

“Because, if Heather really meant all the times she said she loved me, then she wouldn’t have written that letter.  Face it, she gave up on everything we had.  Why?” he blurted out, obviously crying.

“Heather had to leave because she was very sick Nickolas.  She didn’t want to go, but she knew it was the only way.  She had so much faith that the child she was carrying would make you happy, and if she did anything to ruin that, it would have killed her faster.  She never meant to hurt you by dying.” Liz said, trying her best to comfort him.

“But now I have no one.” he sighed.

“You are so wrong Nick.  You have your family, your friends, and four of the nicest guys on the planet on your side.  Howie, Brian, Kevin and AJ love you very much.  And so do the girls.  You also have Katie, who is your most precious gift.” Liz said.

“Yeah, and…” he asked.

“You have me.” she said softly.

Nick sat there, hoping that he had heard her correctly.  His eyes were bloodshot from the tears and the lack of sleep.  Not only was the stress getting to him, his head pounded from the constant hollering back and forth.  He kept thinking to himself that he was too young to have all this happening to him, but then again, he had always had problems in his life.  This was just one more bit of agonizing stress that he didn’t need.

“Nick, did you hear me?” Liz whispered.  All she heard was silence.  “NICKOLAS GENE, WHAT WILL IT TAKE TO GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULL?!!”  she yelled, surprising the guys.

She glanced back at them, realizing it was too late for secrets and lies.  “I LOVE YOU!” she yelled and then sunk down to the floor, tears trickling down her face.

AJ, Brian, Howie and Kevin all stared at her.  “WHAT?” they yelled in unison.

They all knew that she cared for him, and that he had some sort of crush or liking for her, but that was it.  It was all a big shock to them to hear her yell it out.  AJ was trying desperately to pick his mouth up off the floor while the others stared at each other.

“Guys, I will explain later, but trust me…I love him with all my heart.  I have never loved anyone like I love him, but I know that I will never have him.” she said as she stood up and ran to the bathroom.

Hearing Liz’s words made Nick cry even more.  How could she love him?  He was nothing, and she deserved more than that in life.  He was so afraid of loving anyone ever again.  He couldn’t bear to lose another person in his life, especially someone that close to him.  He was afraid to let his heart control him, knowing full well that if he became vulnerable, then it would come back to haunt him.

*** *** ***

“Look, if he doesn’t get his act in gear, I know Kevin is going to leave the group.  He has said it to me.” Dee remarked.

“That is so typical, when a man can’t get his way, he retaliates.  He knows that Nick is having problems, and all Kevin can think of is himself!” Kat pointed out.

“Well, at least Kevin has thought things through!  Have you ever considered what Howie would do if the group broke up?” Dee yelled.

Kat stood there for a moment, considering the right words.  “Yeah, he would probably be happy because he wouldn’t have to put up with Kevin’s shit all the time!  Your husband is a controlling and overbearing dick head!”

With that Dee stomped out of the room, before she did anything she would regret.  She wasn’t angry at Kat’s words, just angry at the situation.  They all knew they were under a lot of stress.  And now, being stuck with everyone 24 hours a day, it was only going to get worse.

Leighanne had taken as much as she could.  Tears were pouring down her face, and she suddenly became nauseous.  She ran as quickly as she could to the bathroom, trying not to vomit all over the place.  Kat stormed off down the hallway, trying to blow off some steam, and Brianna went to get some water.

However, none of them noticed that Katie had wandered off.

*** *** ***

Howie and Brian sat next to Liz in the bathroom as she sobbed.  They tried to comfort her, but were having no luck at all.  “Look guys, I know you are trying to make me feel better, but trust me, I feel like the one to blame in all of this.   I should never have given that letter to him.”

“It’s not your fault.  You only kept a promise to a good friend.  You had no idea that something like this would happen.” Howie said softly, calming her down.

“And now, I just opened my heart to him, embarrassing myself in front of you both and the others, and he took it as a joke.  I give up guys, I just give up.” she finished, then wiped her eyes and walked back out to face the others.

Everyone stood around, desperately trying to figure out everything, when the heard a tiny voice,  “Dada…”

“Little Bits!  What are you doing here?” Brian questioned, not knowing how she got there.

Katie waddled over to the door where Nick sat on the other side.   She immediately started to cry, and called for her father.  “Dada…dada…” she whimpered.

“Katie, is that you sweetheart?” he called through the door.

“Dada!!!” she continued to cry.

“Katie, baby, honey, it’s okay sweetheart.  Dada is right here.  It’s okay sweetie.” he cried through the door.

As Katie cried, Liz immediately picked her up and tried to console her.  Katie’s tears were too much to bear for Nick, so he immediately opened the door and ran to her side.

“Babykins, I am here for you.  I am so sorry.” Nick said as he took her from Liz and ran back into the room.

“NICKOLAS, NO!” Liz screamed as she ran for the door.  “Come out here!  Please!” she hollered.

Upon hearing Liz’s cry, Katie started to cry uncontrollably.  Katie had grown quite attached to Liz and she loved being with her.  She couldn’t stand to be without them both.  Although Katie was quite young, only 1 year and 3 months old, she was extremely bright.  She knew that something was wrong, and it upset her.

“Wiz-a-beff!”  she cried holding her hands towards the door.

“Katie sweetheart, calm down.  You are with me, we don’t need them baby.” Nick said, trying to hush Katie.  He couldn’t help but feel bad for holding her back, but he just was too scared to admit that he needed Liz.

“WIZ-A-BEFF!!!” Katie cried even harder, struggling to free herself from Nick’s arms.  Kicking and screaming, she continued to force herself from Nick’s grip.  Suddenly, she broke free from his grasp and fell to the floor with a loud thud.

*** *** ***

“Leighanne, where is Katie?” Kat asked nervously as she walked back into the room.

“I thought she was with you.” Leighanne looked on with suspicion.

“No, she isn’t with me.  And where is Brianna?” Kat continued to ask as Brianna walked in the room.

“What’s the matter y’all?” she asked without a care.

“WHERE THE HELL IS KATIE??” the two of them yelled in unison.

“She was, was…right here…oh my God…where is she??  She isn’t with one of you two?!!” Brianna panicked.

“NO, she isn’t…Oh God we have to find her!” the three said together and ran off to find the guys.

*** *** ***

“KATIE!!” Nick yelled, his voice full of fear.

“Nick, open up!  Please!  What is wrong with Katie!?” Liz panicked as she pounded on the door.

Nick immediately rushed to the door to unlock it and the whole gang came storming through.  “God Nick, what happened!?” Brian ran to Katie’s side.

“I dropped her…” he said, his voice shaking as she kneeled down next to her.  He was about to pick her up when Katie opened her eyes and said, “Dada…Wiz-a-beff…”.

Everyone was amazed as she sat up and looked around.  To their surprise, she didn’t have a scratch on her, nor a bump on the head.  She was just as tough as her mommy, and bounced right back from it.

“Katie, honey, are you okay?” Nick asked her as he hugged her tightly.

All Katie could do was shake her head ‘no’, and then pout.  Her little brain was working overtime, and she then smiled at everyone.  With that, she took Nick’s hand in her tiny right hand, and then Liz’s hand in her little left hand, and said a remarkable thing.

“Love togever.” she said happily and then jumped up and ran off into the other room.

Nick and Liz knew right away what she meant, and turned a deep shade of crimson.  Here was a baby, telling them what they were supposed to do.  Katie loved them both, and wanted them to be happy, and the only way she could understand it, was for them to be together.

The guys all stood there, picking their jaws up of the floor, and then laughed in amazement.  The girls came running into the room, not sure why they were laughing and immediately blurted out that Katie was missing.

“Don’t worry ladies, Katie is fine, and I think she just gave us ALL a lesson about love and life.” Brian said as he walked over to Leighanne and held her tight.

Everyone just glanced at each other and then burst into fits of giggles.  But, among the laughter and the happy tears, there were two people, finding love again in their hearts.  When everyone turned to Nick and Liz, they saw the two sharing a gentle and passionate kiss.
 
 

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