Being Able to Cry Again by Kristina Madison
No more being alone
I've finally shed my tears
No more building it up
For my building blocks have been stricken down,
And drown by the tears I used to hide.
I can finally open my eyes
After the years of them being closed.
I wanted to feel different,
I wanted to be one outside of the crowd
I used to push the people aside,
And now, I let them see
They see me for me
Not her for her
Not them for them
The tragic beginning of hurting,
Is nothing like the outcome of defeat.
I should know
I've been there.
I used to draw with a pretty black crayon
Even when things meant to be colorful.
What was wrong with me?
I do not know then.
But yes, I do know now.
I was hiding my tears
Being trapped underneath this water of death.
I regain hope
Nothing is lost
But tears.
And I wouldn't have it any other way.
Cinderella by Kristina Madison
We didn't know how it would end up,
But we soon after,
We found out.
Something is missing to this story,
A lost slipper,
A collar, but no dog.
Jesus, with a burned cross.
We have to figure it all out,
It's for the better
What we put off until tomorrow
Is just another issue we must fight.
Sadly, we fight a one sided battle
There isn't much to defeat,
But that broken heart.
Crowns and jewels with no proper majesty
Explains us.
We've never had anything planned out
We're always searching.
But never find our way.
We're alone
But are we?
I'm singing a melancholy tune
While you're having the time of your life.
The naked, but mystery knife
Looks more alive and well,
When human flesh is whipped from it.
Bountiful amounts of apathy,
Drained from my body everyday,
It finds it's way to you
So then you too, will have something to show.
I've got no heart.
I'm simply bleeding metal.
Whipping it with lyric upon lyric
To cover the monstrosity up.
I've go no keys,
For now, I am an open book
Oppressed by you,
Made into you,
I love you, only
If you too, were a wind up doll.
But you, you are just simply the winder.
Closer To Closure by Kristina Madison
Drifting into spaces
Blocked off by yellow tape
Sacred thoughts
Are bound to break.
A miss lead fortune
Hopes with no future
Following the cult
And drowning in the water.
Beautiful pain
Loving anguish
Spikes instead of jewels
Dreams are often caught.
Flesh is only prettier
When you have some.
Closing your eyes
To get a mental picture
Of perfection, because there is none in reality.
Off to the side
There is a child crying
Crying for the attention she doesn't give him.
Ravishing creatures are bound to get ugly
Once they see the light.
And they don't know how it feels
Because they aren't you
Only suction will let them imagine your pain.
Only self-pity.
Four Names to Write by Kristina Madison
The sky gets darker and darker with each cloud
Santa's the host at Christmas
But doesn't show.
What happens to those children that hope and wish upon a star
And the twinkle is set free,
And never returned...
Echoing stressed opinions fill my head
Searching for an opening
But always running
And circling around to the same spot
Never amounting to anything...
And it feels like I'm being born again.
Coming into a state of shock
While they want me to become something for their false unity.
Screaming out to you,
Wishing you could see
All that you are.
Would you listen to me,
If I screamed at you?
Or would you even think to acknowledge,
My faint whisper?
I've been granted one unhealthy wish
And that is to see you
Everywhere I go
And wherever my remains stay.
Dying to live
I'm dying to love
Shaking dirt from my toes
Blowing the dirty brown hair from your face
To release the glow in your eyes
I cant help but remember how you used to hide.
Guitar wounds are able to be mended
But when your wounds are deeper than you can see
It haunts you, and brings out the phantoms of your inner feelings that you wish you would had never known.
Running from you was the scariest mistake I've been able to handle.
I Do Not Know by Kristina Madison
Depressed
Lost, and deep within my thoughts.
There is no way of escaping this place
Anymore.
It's my fate
My reality has finally come
And has grown on me
Grown with me
It is me now.
I never let it come,
And now I've given it a chance.
A chance to find out who I really am,
Inside.
But will I ever find that out?
I've got nothing left but false hope, and lost dignity.
What emotions I shall enjoy while I try and get out of this situation
I no longer want to be in.
Sorrow is nothing more but a slight greeting
To my lost
But found life.
I'm Fixed by Kristina Madison
I hate feeling the way I do
About everything
And especially you
I know I should hate you forever
But it's not quite that easy.
I never knew growing up caused so much discomfort.
If I knew how much it caused
I would had packed my bags, and turned the clock on the years,
Long ago.
I guess you have to make the clock go forward sometime,
And now is just one of those days.
You have to pack your bags and move forward
Or else, you wind up getting nothing in return
But unhappiness, and unuseful knowledge.
If I knew how much discomfort growing up caused,
I would had packed my bags and turned the clock on the years,
Long ago.
But, I'm not stuck in a standstill anymore.
I'm fixed.
And, I've managed to give it a try
I'm not a quitter.
Jewels Are More But A Shining Way By Kristina Madison
Mourning in the time of night
Screaming but not being heard
Falling from the top,
Realizing there is no bottom.
Scarred memories are bound to be heard.
What's left when you have no future?
You can't look back on familiarity
Being saved is nothing but a light sentence to some,
And others
A lifetime.
A lifetime of oppression
Of conformity
Being molded into something you are not totally intimate with.
But you do it for the sake of being alive.
The stars are saffron
But you would say they are maroon
Just because you were brought up with biased opinions all of your life.
Short-worded sentences are all that you can say
You've never been exposed to light.
And you will never know the truth
Just by the shallow end of the water.
Dark blue is always good
To give you a new perspective upon others thoughts.
And beautiful, glowing, growing flowers are impelled to wilt
Just from the scent of obliviousness.
Cherish what you've got
Because life doesn't come cheap.
The sky is always so dark and you can never understand the true meaning behind the clouds,
Padded walls close in on your every move
It feels like suicide.
You want to run, but there's always something blocking your way.
It feels like acid running through your body, and it cannot escape.
My heart beats
Only because it has to.
I don't understand it --
Why is pain a form of deep love?
Way in my groove,
You cannot see it because
I cover it with shame and guilt
But you can feel it.
You talk to me only
In whisper.
One light touch and
It's all gone.
There's nothing left when
You live a life full of lies.
Hug yourself dearly,
No one can stop you from
Helping yourself.
I'll go hang myself to stop
The cutting.
Won't you join in this
World full of lies?
Circle around your heart and
Drown.
Lonely by Kristina Madison
Lonely stars are bound to still burn...
Just not as bright.
Darker lights mean better days...
Together with you..
A resurrection of a lost soul
Will find its way back to their only love.
The wind makes your hair blow gently..
Without you noticing the pusher.
You always believe in something when it's not there.
You cannot see feelings,
But the rush is so insane you cannot ignore the intense glow.
It does with you everywhere you carry it...
Until you can no longer bare it alone.
Rose petals fall, but it does not mean that they are dead.
They've just lost their grip to life.
Something everyone does now and then.
It's the price you pay for being lonely.
How can you be sure if something is lost...If it's never found again?
If could be misplaced...
Looking for the right time to be found...
Like you.
You're scared...
Do I intimidate you?
Or are you, too, scared of lonesome?
Loosen your grip.
Looking Forward by Kristina Madison
Feelings are more than what I put on paper
They're real.
They are like the wind..
I do not show them,
But you can feel they are there...
If you are wise enough.
Get deeper into thought,
And less in the open air;
There isn't anything above room temperature.
I slit my wrists while I have a smile on my face,
Nothing else matters
Unless I am dead.
Selfish thoughts take over the true pain...
The true pain of happiness.
You cannot judge me by the false accusations everyone around you puts out.
I may be shallow on the outside,
But drown deep enough into my pale skin, and see the dripping red-blood venom I compress within my heart.
A heart of silver
I'm crying metal...
And with every tear,
I let out anger and regain hope..
Hope for the future..
Whatever that may be.
There are consequences to life..
It's what you call
Growing up.
Our Selfish System by Kristina Madison
Innocent bystanders get blurred in the extreme measures of mortal death
Never getting a slight gruesome out look.
The peephole has contradicted itself.
Maybe by closing your vision you think you're immune to sudden chaos...
But you're not.
The more you shut it out, the more its willing to break down your barrier.
Romantic stories become deathly scares
Chokers being to cause paleness to your neck and face.
Black painted finger nails begin to leave faded yellow stains on your nails...
The residue burns away at your heart,
Just like an addict on marijuana.
Hopes have been shattered
Dreams have been made;
Not necessary to be made to come true...
Just to state a mindless factor in everyday society.
Suicide is a willing thrill to everyone
It's not popular to be happy anymore,
Everyone wants sympathy to feel better about themselves...
But do they even acknowledge the fact of true unhappiness?
The ones who are complaining they want to die...
Don't realize the person next to them that lost their life,
Not wanting to.
But having too; diseases are common now,
But not the type with scabs left on your wrist
While you get dropped into the ground...
Are you happy people eulogize you now?
Pain is Forever by Kristina Madison
I woke up this morning
And tried to write a poem
I wanted to learn whom I was
But the words didn't come out
I'm losing all of my balance
I don't know where I will fall
I try and pull myself together
It's all for the team
Nothing seems to matter
When it's just me
It pains me to laugh and smile
But yet, I do it for them
I hate to get interrogated
Yet, they say I do it for attention
This madness has driven me insane
Why can't I just easy the pain?
Needles and knives just won't do the trick now
I've realized
Nothing can easy the pain.
Radiation by Kristina Madison
The foundation that has been built for your existence,
Has not been made by you,
But by clay handlers.
You're already in the oven,
So you have to get out before you perish.
Perish into a thousand glowing pieces
Like the remains of a beautiful firework image in the darken sky.
Shades of ravishing yellow, glowing, beautiful masterpieces
Shapes of wide open spaces,
Is the beginning of a closer that they block out of your mind.
They mold you into a cult,
That doesn't only kill you,
But everyone you care about.
What do you do when the sky starts to fall?
You block the pieces from cutting your face.
But when you get the opportunity to stand on your own two feet,
Why don't you stand up for your life,
For your inner image... your individuality.
Stop making the hazardous flames from burning your human flesh.
Happiness always fails
But you always regain it back.
Life's a cycle,
And you're in its path.
Selfish by Kristina Madison
I cut myself to ease my pain
And leave others far behind
I never wanted to hurt them,
I only wanted to help myself.
I never wanted any advice
Only to be left alone, unheard in the shadows of the vacant lot.
My room has my remains left,
With the blood stains on the floor.
I lost all of my self-respect, confidence, my will to live.
I only wanted to be happy,
Just like everyone else pretends.
They hide it so much better than I;
They even show a smile.
All I show is a face with false promises, unwanted truth, and beautiful betrayal.
Bountiful rays of apathy
Push its youth though my eyes.
I only wanted to finally see clearly,
Without having to scratch my eyes out; all over again.
I inhale the poison from the clean, free, American air,
Only to get the drifting smell of dead rotting bodies, getting the polluted air from the guns, bombs, and planes killing tons of innocent people.
How can you have a free state of mind,
In an atmosphere such as this one?
We may be free without our sheltered boundaries
But when one foot is out of reach,
We slowly die.
Do you think that we're still free?
I only wanted to express my feelings,
Instead I ended up giving my life.
Do you feel good you ignored me?
Shapes by Kristina Madison
And I'm sick of all of these words that never should have been spoken
I'm drowning before your eyes
And you don't even notice my soft innocent childlike cries.
I've let you help me up more than enough times
But when you're not there,
I lose my balance and fall again.
Lost expressions
Caressed by sheepish eyes.
You feel as if you can hide behind a shield of unhappiness
When you are waiting for my depression to mold you down even further into the circumstances.
Ashes come from the ends of a magnificent glowing fire
As if it was the only thing of importance.
Put it out before it burns your life
And you fade away,
Within the ancient circumference.
Speak For Yourself by Kristina Madison
Here I am again
Sitting here looking at your pictures
While in my heart, it's blank and damp.
Judging by the looks of things
You don't know me as well as you thought.
It's okay though, I often give off wrong ways of light
...Wrong ways of hopes and dreams.
It's your fault you fell for me,
I never insisted I'd pick you up
And put you back on your feet.
Today's over
And tomorrow's another day.
Make it better than yesterday.
Stop worrying about your wrongs
And make a right turn at the green light just ahead.
Stop signs are put there for a reason;
But everyone interprets different meanings.
Speak for yourself.
The End by Kristina Madison
Music is my medicine
Society is my sickness
Bringing me down
No no, I won't let that happen to me.
They take away your privileges
They take away your individuality.
I won't let my foundation break apart.
Individuality is nothing more than everyone's similarity
There's no turning back
You cannot change the way things are going out to be.
No, you can't fucking change reality.
Fight and fight, you try and win
Never again, will you see the brightness the dark clouds and shadows hide;
Beneath the drowning sky.
What's left?
Together by Kristina Madison
Coming to your window
With a different thought in mind while
I look at you,
I can see you are just as nervous as
I am.
I have a picture in mind
Of me and you
Together with no one else
We're selfish together
And that's the only way it can be.
I'm loving this feeling as I hold you
Tightly in my grasp.
I never want this feeling
To end.
Yet it's over before
I know it.
Judging by the look
In your eyes,
I can tell something's wrong.
We're moving too fast
And you're getting nervous.
You don't know what to do
When you've fallen
In love - again.
It's too intense for you -
And you wish it would
End.
We're in this together
You love me
And I love you
I know we both don't want to get hurt - again.
But we're already in love.
Flowers wilt
They never
Die.
Feelings are like flowers-
Delicate and beautiful
Just like your heart.
We Didn't Succeed by Kristina Madison
And we tried to grow up
But we failed
You've gone from mature to immature
Thinking you are so cool
What about everyone you've hurt?
Did you ever put them into consideration before your own feelings?
Trapped in apathy
I wallow in self pity
Over you
Pathetic little you
You used to seem so big
Such a big deal in my life
What are you going to do,
When you hear about the incident with me and that sharp razor-like knife?
Everyone's mad at you
No one else is the same
You shouldn't had lied to me
Now, I've caught up with your game
You think it's no big deal
But even if you did, you won't show it
But, I know you can feel it.
I know you never meant to hurt me
You said everything would be all right
Yes, it's all right
No more being deprived of my mind
Because you are finally off of it.
How can you just forget about someone you cared about so deeply,
In a matter of seconds?
Obviously, that's what you do
Every time you say you love someone else
You hurt me too.
You're On My Mind Again by Kristina Madison
Last time I looked at the stars,
I memorized your face and put them in the background.
Thinking of you and your beautiful face while quietly crying
Is the best source of relief I can think of.
I drew a daring picture of you tonight
and wrote a poem next to it
To tell you how I feel.
You're always on my mind
And when I see a shooting star
I follow it with my half-closed red eyes and dream of you and I together one day soon.
You make me feel complete, and now I know that I'm not alone.
When we sleep and dream
We're laying far away from each other,
But I'm always dreaming of being right next to your side,
Giving you soft, unquestionable kisses upon your nose.
No more scars to put on my wrists
You have not yet judged me.
Bracelets and necklaces of affection,
Hugs with lovable grips,
Awesome songs with thoughtful lyrics..
I dream of it all,
When I close my eyes.
A New Feeling by Kristina Madison
I sit here and think of you,
While you are far,
Distant from my reach,
Not like I've felt your soft skin before.
There's no explanation as to why I feel like this...
It's against all of my beliefs...
It's against all of the rules..
Be yet, you've been the only one I've been able to dream of for sometime...
Feeling the crisp grass beneath my bare naked feet...
Smelling the brisk mild air...
Seeing the dark shadows within the time of night...
Shaking the ants off of my toes...
I being to think of you once again.
For no special reason at all;
Just because yopu're on my mind.
I'm far from loving you
FUCK! I just met you!
I'm getting myself into something deep
Something I know I won't be able to get myself out of...
Feeling annoyed with myself, and everyone around me
Because I'm too stubborn to tell you how I feel
...Or am I?...
Maybe I'm making a huge deal out of nothing...
Bottled up inside
Are the feelings I'll never say...
Bottled up in my mind..
And that's where they remain to stay...
Maybe you should feel special...
Actions by Kristina Madison
Smiling.
Smiling because of what happened between us.
Smiling because we don't have to fuss.
Smiling because of what we shared together,
Even if it didn't last forever.
Listening.
Listening to our songs,
Listening to the fire as it crackles and turns into bits of gray, dull smoke and slowly withers away.
Listening to the small children play, even as it turns into a dark, cloudy day.
Crying.
As I cry, my eyes are red, my lips are salty from the tears I dispose when I think of you, and what you did to me.
Crying when I think of all the good times we had together.
My fingertips have no prints of them anymore.
They've all withered away, while I rub my eyes harshly.
Shouting.
Shouting out to everyone to see if they still care.
I'm shouting out to you, to see if you're still there.
Walking.
Walking away from you.
I'm walking away from my problems,
Although, they surround me, and suffocate me, just as you did.
Sleeping.
I'm sleeping to wish all my memories to turn out to be happy dreams.
I'm sleeping to try to forget your face,
Although, that's hard because you're every place.
Thinking.
Thinking if you're worth all of this pain I shed.
Thinking if I really wish I were dead.
Forgetting.
Forgetting all of your sweet talk.
Forgetting the way you told me how you walked.
Forgetting everything that has to do with you,
Before I die, because I'm suffocating while I turn blue.
But now, I can finally release myself from you.
And I Found Myself Tonight by Krisina Madison
And nothing seems to go my way,
I'm thinking and remembering when we were together.
We would talk about summer sets, and Music.
Thinking back and reliving our past memories, makes me feel sorrow and I want it to go away.
I've lived in so much blackness, it suffocates me.
I've always wanted to be unnoticed, yet someone finds a way to notice me and asks 'why?'
People are so nosey, and I hate them all.
And I wan to relive life again, I want to go into my past and change what could have been; into what the future will be.
No one can change the past, but I will live better in the present.
While I continue to re chip the black paint off my lifeless fingers, I will remember my mistakes, and hopefully never make them again.
Growing up is the most painful experience to live through; yet everyone has a chance to fulfill that experience.
Ending my life is no longer with me because I have come to realize that I wasn't born to live in depression all of the time.
Who cares if I get laughed at? Who cares if I get pointed at? I don't anymore.
I'm not changing for anyone; not today; nor tomorrow.
I've found myself and I'm not letting go.
And I don't intend on following that worthless pathetic flow.
As I sit by Kristina Madison
As I sit in a dim corner of my lonely room,
With a Needle in one hand, and your picture in the other.
Taking my life seems like the only way to survive this toucher that I place upon myself.
You obviously don't seem to care,
so why should I?
As I sit in a dim corner of my lonely room,
I listen to my Music.
Music that you people call disturbing noise.
My life is a wondrous chaos.
When I wish upon my star, my only star of hope,
It turns its back on me,
Just like you.
As I sit in a dim corner of my lonely room,
I just think of the unimaginable stress that's risen into my body to stay.
My soul has been driven out and a new Devil has possessed me with its grateful hate.
I'm a new person because of this new feeling that I'm experiencing.
Never again will you see the old me,
Never again will you remember, the person, I once used to be.
As I sit in my dim corner of my lonely room,
I'm secluded.
I'm secluded away from you.
Blue by Krstina Madison
I can't explain what is happening to me,
I can't take full responsibly for my actions.
I want to go home,
To a warm cottage,
Away from everyone and everything.
Florida doesn't seem the same anymore.
It's cold in my heart, and blistering hot outside,
I'm wondering weather or not I should wear a halter top,
Or a sweater.
A ring on my finger,
Means nothing now.
A kiss on the cheek,
Is more than words can say.
Nothing makes me happy,
Unless you're part of my day.
Counting down until the day we meet,
Losing sleep over this too.
I cannot concentrate on everything else,
Along with you.
So,
I take my blanket,
And suffocate me.
Until I turn blue.
Breaking the Circle by Kristina Madison
We're stuck in this so called "love game." All our roads lead to each other, just a circle of confusion, and we want a fork in the open road. Our eyes are closed and we don't know which road to pick, will we be together at either end? Or, will our trust me lost again? Being confused about each other, to me is like I stop breathing. I turn blue and cold, dry and old. Hopeless is how I may seem. I'm hopeless because I'm stuck in a whorl of confusion, al all I can see, all I want to see, if for you and me, to be together. Us together, no rules, no jokes. Just us, conquering the mystery of love, and Breaking the Circle.
Poked by the fork in the middle of the road
Which way shall I go?
Will I have enough strength
For which ever journey I decide to pick?
Living in an atrophy world
Surrounded by paper
I begin to attempt to leap
I realize I can no longer make the steepness
So I burn
Would I still be in the same situation
If I had picked the road less walked upon?
Leading is no better than following
But maybe then, I wouldn't be trapped
Maybe, I wouldn't be trapped
I'm just worthless
Defeat has over come me
Now, I must vanish
Leaving a trace
Only this time...
Then time and time again..
Dazed And Confused by Kristina Madison
You say you love me,
You say you'll always be there,
Now you've left me standing,
And you don't even care.
You go on your merry way,
Walking away from me,
You don't even think to look back,
You don't even think to shed a tear.
You think everything's fine,
Because we say it is;
You know deep down inside,
It's killing both you and me.
I can pretend this didn't affect me,
But then I'd only be a lying person.
Lying; to myself and to you.
Gee, once like you did to me too.
While the tears roll down my face,
I know it was true,
When you said you loved me,
I knew you lied.
You said you'd never hurt me,
That you'd always be there;
But look where that got us;
Nowhere.
Now, we're both left, dazed and confused,
While you go on,
With someone new.
Will you leave her, like you left me?
Or, will you be true to your heart this time?
As a year passes, I come to question myself,
Were we in Love? Or, was it lust?
While we try to figure that out, you will be by yourself,
As will I.
Just sitting here,
Dazed and Confused,
without each other.
Death by Kristina Madison
The life I once used to have, has now risen out of my body into the midst of the dark, foggy, cold, midnight air. There us no use to true and work things out with anyone. Not enough time in a life time to figure out every detail. Loving someone, for me. is like breathing, but with no air. I feel trapped. In love, I'm trapped in a world of confusion, although, you, the person I love, is right next to me. When I love, I die. I remain in the state of shock. I realize this love, I feel is just the same. I try too hard to get one persons way of life. I'm sick of listening. The time has now come for me to just end it all. Death is very fresh in my mind. Most people won't understand my actions until they put forth the effort to listen to me. People try too hard to get me to turn into someone they want me to be. Certain people are just so self-centered, and won't listen to my reasons for living the life that I do. Deep within my soul, I know things in the world are all right, and just that certain people are just evil to each other. People need to close their mouths, open their ears, and strive to make that heart that you do have, to come out. A lot of things go wrong, and I think that's why they named it "life." Life could mean so many different things, while at other times, it could mean a simple fact. Death. The dark, deep, life that I have on this Earth will follow me when I die. Some people question, and get overly excited about where they'll go, at the end of this "upper life." But when I think about it I know that when I die, I go into the ground. When my time's done, my clock has finally taken it's final tick, will I know that I've begun my real life. Which is Death.
Deeper by Kristina Madison
Deeper than you'll ever feel
It tares me apart
One by one
I slowly die
And although you cannot see it
I know you can feel it
I look into your eyes
And you give me the look of the deathly, cold, pale, blue icey eyes
And you turn your back on me
Like everyone else has
Sooner or later it will fuck you up, like it did everyone else
Why do you care so much?
Why do you like making me live through hell?
Am I just that easy?
Don't I make you nervous
Nervous will all of the thoughts I pop in your head
While you stare at me and wonder why.
Why.
Different by Krisina Madisn
I'm just another broken crayon in the old gray box.
A misplaced figure in the beautiful, yet confusing picture.
Not the brightest star in the dark midnight moon light, but still not the dimmest.
I don't greet death, but I don't shut it out.
Confused, yet somewhat sure.
Different, but the way I made myself to be.
I'm in my own dim corner, all alone, no other dark body beside me.
Music is my medicine.
Your hate is my food.
Your blood, so rich and red, but mine, so blue instead.
Cold, just like my flesh.
Deep in my thoughts,
As I sit and think and ask questions to myself.
My personality is different from yours.
The sweat comes directly from my pours.
Just like you.
So why, do you look at me, so differently too?
Drain by Kristina Madison
Staring out of the car window
Hearing music
But not listening
I come alive
I think about what I should say
Is it even worth it?
Is it worth the pain?
Is it worth this triggering agony?
I want to be set free
I can no longer let their life take the best of me
I've lost all control of my mind, body, and soul
I fee like I am floating
Above my own puddle of blood
My pain is left for the others
But I am happy
The others left behind me are mourning
Is this what I want
Is it worth their pain
For my own happiness?
Drowning by Kristina Madison
As the tears slowly, painfully, drip down my soft cold skin,
And enter the pours of my face, all the way down to my lips,
I begin to come alive.
They will never fall on to the ground,
Nor will they be wasted by petty issues.
They will be used on the pain and suffering from this repeated longing to be with you.
I've been so wrong to think I didn't love you,
I've been so wrong to think that you weren't meant to be with me; lips to lips.
I've been so wrong...to ever doubt you.
Now, you've gone.
You've left me standing here,
You've left me alone.
Alone to fight this two-way-street battle.
How will I go on without you?
Longing to be with you,
Meaning to say my desire for you,
But I cannot,
Because I've let you slowly drift away.
Away from my petty heart.
And now I drown.
First and Last Glance by Kristina Madison
Wearing a black trench coat,
Painting my nails black.
Tasting the dark, rich, black mascara that's running down my cheeks, as I sit and think of you.
I sit and wonder why, I'm not good enough for you.
Ever since you have said "no,"
I've had my door shut to the new things.
You can only remain in my soul; for you have taken it.
You are the only person for my heart; for you have broken it, and kept it beneath your small sized shoe.
Your small sized shoe shows how much power you have over my weak, helpless body.
I begin to wither away in the black trench coat I was once too big for.
I blame myself for all of this.
I have a dark habit for loving you.
I'm down six feet under; six feet under reality.
Everything is beginning to be too much for me.
My whole life is fading in front of my eyes.
My eyes are beginning to shut. I can't stand any more sparkle of life.
I can't stand to see you anymore. You're so perfect; in my eyes.
I see things no one else sees of you. I see your heart.
I see your crystal blue eyes; I see a person.
I don't see an image I once saw before I fell for you.
I see someone at the end of my foggy and dusty road.
I see someone whom I can't life with, but someone whom I cannot live without.
That someone; happens to be you. Now, you glance at me. My heart starts racing, then automatically stops because I come to realize, you're not glancing at me. You're glancing at the past, and staying with it.
Forgotten by Kristina Madison
Guys
Why can't they be more understanding?
Why do they just leave me standing?
I feel so alone,
Since I've flown; away from your heart.
Like when you're done with a grocery cart.
Never again, will I love someone like you.
Why must you make me feel so blue?
You used to always make me feel glad.
Even when everyone's made me mad.
Why? Why, couldn't I have been nicer?
Maybe you'd forget about her, and love me back again don't know what I shall do, without you there.
My heart will always be in a tear.
I used to make you feel happy.
Now, you won't even think about me; without being sappy.
I don't want to be alone anymore.
I don't want to feel so dead on the floor.
I have no use for my vocal cords, because I can't scream at you anymore.
I never realized how much you meant to me, until you finally let me go.
Why must you be so happy without me? That's not the way it's supposed to be.
How many times is my heart going to die, until I learn how to fly?
Just one jump; that's all it takes.
To make me loose; all my mistakes.
Is it still too early to dream?
How about tomorrow
Or will it be too late then?
When will I have the answers to my thoughts
...and to my dreams?
There is no pressure in this conclusion.
...Or is there?
What does it take to have my dreams become reality?
Do I need to cut deep in my groove?
Do I need to have a fatal death?
What is it.
You tell me
Together we weap
We're deprived of everything
Just to be together.
Then, we realize it's not the distance that is keeping us apart.
It's our destiney.
What is it going to take?
You tell me.
I watch as you slowly drift apart from my once, tightly held grip.
What happened to that saftey spot?
Did you grow up and realize to act yourself?
Or did you realize you don't need a helping hand
In this game of life.
Her by Kristina Madison
I miss the long phone conversations that we once had. I miss the way you could always make me laugh, even with the stupidest things you could have said. I miss the way I felt when you said you loved me. I miss the way you stuck up for me, even when you knew I was all right by myself. I miss how you used to ask me if things were going okay with the guy I liked, even if it would hurt you. But you would fight that feeling of hurt, just for me. I miss how we used to fight, but in the end, things would always turn out peachy. No matter what I did, you always made me feel as if I was the top person in your life. Now that she's entered your life, I feel like I'm not needed in your life anymore. I'm not wanted. Now that she's entered your life, all our things we used to talk about, and do together, are only memories to linger in my thoughtful mind. They'll never parish, never fade away into the dark blackness that you've pushed me into. You'll always live within me. And, you'll die with me, even though things have changed. Things will never be the same, and I'll always go on missing you, like you did for me once before. I don't want to go on missing you anymore, now, as I lay lifeless upon the floor.
Hole by Kristina Madison
And I'm so sick, cold and forgotten.
The only way people notice me is if I'm bought.
That's no way to live,
So please, let me forgive,
The assholes that made me think I'm nothing,
Because, I'm going to make it out of this retched black hole and become fucking something!
I've never felt like this before,
Never felt what it's like to live in such a bore.
I'm sitting here thinking of you,
And wondering, if you're thinking of me too.
I know that you and I, are over,
And I wanna go on and live a life of a stoner.
I know that I cannot have you back,
And that thought, is what makes me have a lifetime heart attack.
Sitting alone, with nothing to do,
But just to think of poor fucked up little you.
Digging my nails deeper and deeper through my flesh and skin,
Not even flinching, and starting all over again with the shiny fire red pin.
Getting lost in my world of lonesome,
Wait for you to step into, what I call, a hole.
I Can't Take It by Kristina Madison
I can't take it,
The World's changing.
I can't take it.
My whole life's fading.
I can't take it.
The love's no longer there.
I can't take it.
People just aren't fair.
I can't take it.
You don't love me like you said you would forever.
I can't take it.
You said we'd always be together.
I can't take it.
Always and forevers are lies.
I can't take it.
No matter how hard I try.
I Need An Escape by Kristina Madison
Verse 1---
Why put forth an effort,
When you know you cannot make it?
Why cry,
and waste your tears?
Nothing is ever enough for a simple display of affection.
Chorus---
Nothing is ever good enough for you.
You still yell at me,
While I slowly wither away,
Slip away
From your vision;
From your tight deathly grip.
Verse 2---
I don't smile when I am happy,
I have an opaque appearance.
I look at you,
And hurt you with my evil deathly opinions.
I strive to stay as far away from you as possible.
It's not possible with your strength.
Chorus (x2)
Verse 3---
I just want to live again.
I just want to feel again.
I just want to love again.
I just want to see again.
So why can't I just leave you alone?
Chorus
Verse 4---
I just need an escape from this hell I'm brought upon.
And it's all of my fault.
So don't penalize yourself.
Inside by Kristina Madison
Stressed, Hurt, Angry, Pain, Love, Games, Fun, Upset, Happy Sad...
Sometimes being mad. Only happy for Mom and Dad. What's the use for me to live? Other than being a people pleaser, and getting hurt by the people I love. No one cares. they love to see me suffer in this place they call home. Is this pleasant place? "No!" Forgive me if I sound evil, but this is because of certain people This anger shouldn't be expressed through the stress to the people that actually love and care about me. For the people that don't give a damn about me, I should live; I should keep doing what I'm doing. It seems to be pissing you off enough, for you to waste your time, talking about me. You don't care what I feel, what I could be, or who I am. It is so easy for me to put up with your shit. I just close my mouth, listen to what you feed me, Put my feelings to the test, and write down everything to express this. People think that I have it all, and they treat me differently. People should treat me like everyone else, they should except me for who I am, how I feel, what I do, how I act, the way I talk ... if not, then everything needs to be forgotten, and all this fake should stop.
It's Going To Happen by Kristina Madison
Scarred and mislead,
There is something wrong with me,
Always wanting to un-confused my head.
Something's eating me alive,
I can't figure it out,
I might as well give up and die.
There is no hope for me,
There is no future,
I wish people would leave me alone and let me become me.
Nothing to do with my life,
It's such a shame,
I might as well go and pick up that unstained knife.
Fall into a world of love,
Fall into a world of peace,
Fall into a world of hope,
And never a day of dismal dreams.(x2)
People are so shallow to one another,
There is no hope in this world,
Everyone might as well give up and stay mad at each other.
Fall into a world of love,
Fall into a world of peace,
Fall into a world of hope,
And never a day of dismal dreams.
The black cloud has come for us all,
There is no hope,
We are all where we've put ourselves in this world,
We are all going to fall---
Fall into a world of love,
Fall into a world of peace,
Fall into a world of hope,
And never a day of dismal dreams. (x2)
Married Life
Bob's washing his car today,
While the restless kids are out to play.
Married life just isn't what it's supposed to be like.
Mary's walking her dog outside,
While one young kid is trying to wave down a taxi for a ride.
Married life just isn't what it's supposed to be like.
Billy needs to get started on his horrid taxes so he can get money back,
While the children are looking up at the sky without a care, flat on their backs.
Married life just isn't what it's supposed to be like.
Jan's out shopping at the grocery store, buying food for the kids, and herself,
While the five year old leaves cookies for Santa and his elf's.
Married life just isn't what it's supposed to be like.
Peter and Hope go to the morgue with their grief inside,
While a teenager gets picked on, and attempts suicide.
Yeah, married life just isn't what it's supposed to be like.
Yeah, married life just isn't what it's supposed to be like.
Yeah, married life just isn't what it's supposed to be like.
Yeah, married life just isn't what it's supposed to be like.
My Only Dream by Kristina Madison
Waking up to your shining face,
Is something I often dream of.
My dreams are places that I can visit, whenever I'm feeling down about us.
Us, is another word for unity. For trust between two people.
Never have I found someone like you, and never have I communicated with someone, as well as I do with you.
Even the smallest things remind me of you.
I don't know what that is supposed to show, but I can feel that I'm deeply in love with you.
No words, actions, or gifts could ever show how much you mean inside my heart.
There isn't anything I'd rather be doing,
Than to be inside your arms,
Your soft, gentle grip against my hips,
While we dance; to no music at all.
But, while I think of all this magical sparkle in our lives...
I've got to wake up to reality.
I've got to realize, this will never be.
My World by Kristina Madison
In this World, we all live in Mourn,
No one thinks to care for each other,
All we do is score.
We do not love each other like a sister or a brother.
I want to visit my World again,
I want to die again.
There is no cure for my feelings.
No one understands how and why I feel the way I do.
Sometimes I just want to get away, and forever stay.
My World is filled with just as much hateful and depressing things, so why isn't it better than this World you call free?
Because I'm not trapped, I'm not told what to do or how to run my life.
I just go on being me. Yeah, that's the life for me.
I want to live in my own World, I want to be me, in my own World.
I can't be sucked into peoples' affairs.
I just want to be somewhere, far, far, far away from you.
Never by Kristina Madison
Listening to my favorite songs,
Reading my favorite lyrics,
Thinking of my life,
And how I can relate.
You're always a part of these synonyms,
You're never apart from me,
Physically, I'm holding on,
Mentally, I'm losing touch.
Reading my favorite poems,
Watching my favorite T.V. show,
I can do nothing but compare those characters,
Into what you are.
Looking up at the stars,
Counting each one, and wondering where you are,
They twinkle,
As do you upon my wishes.
Thinking of the future,
Wondering what I shall do without you,
I parish upon those wretched thoughts.
Thinking back to the nights when we used to disagree,
Wondering what I could have done, to stop that hurt between us.
Now,
All I have left,
Are those thoughts.
They will never be forgotten.
New Me by Kristina Madison
Nothingness is surrounding me,
Closing in on my every move.
I have no feelings anymore,
They've all withered away.
They're stuck in a zone,
A zone of which will never come back to me.
Gone,
I want you out of my life.
Never to be seen again.
The footsteps you've left in my heart.
I want the tide to wash them all away.
I'm slowly dying,
While I'm living to love you.
My hopes and dreams have washed away.
Like when the sun sets, to realize it's the end of a dark, gloomy, cold, day.
I'll never be the same.
All of this toucher has changed me into someone, everyone else does not know.
Time has come to relieve myself,
And with that, I will take my final breath...
To release me from you.
Nothing by Kristina Madison
So, I saw you in my thoughts again
That doesn't mean I'll get to see you in my dreams
Maybe I'll be lucky to see you in my nightmares.
I wish you were near, not too far away
I wish this was over
We're deprived of love.
W're deprived of each other.
Does it matter?
What a lack of commitment
Being ripped apart form inside to out,
Has never felt this way
Never felt this strong
Never felt like you.
I don't have to see you to feel you.
I'm not materialistic.
I know we are lost
Searching for one another
But it seems every time we find what we're looking for,
We always want to go off,
Wander...
And search for something else.
Just to end up with the same results
Nothing.
Is it time again?
Number 7
I sit here and think,
That seem like the only thing I can do for free,
In this god forsaken country.
Even that, you can't do without putting up a fight,
A fight for what you believe is right.
Everyone has their own opinions, just like you and me,
We should all be given the same equal opportunity.
You try to be different, while everyone's still trying to be the same to fit in with everyone,
Well, I've come to find out that it's no fun.
Being yourself comes naturally,
While being someone else, is another way of conformity.
We've all been given the right to say what we feel,
So, what's the deal?
Our New Best Friends by Kristina Madison
As I sit and think about you, a lot of things run into my mind; and makes my soul tremble.
Not seeing your face with my own eyes, not seeing you do your usual activities, makes me want you even more.
The computer and phone have now become our new best friends; because we know one another is behind them.
Other people think that it is impossible, uncalled for, and even often stupid of us to love each other. They claim that if you cannot see them everyday, you do not "know" them.
What's the meaning of "Know"?
You could "know" someone for as long as you can remember, and still not understand a thing about them.
Come to find out, these certain people whom say we cannot love each other, are often the ones that are stupid, judgmental people.
People are often too caught up in our relationship, to experience one of their own; So they must criticize and point their fingers at us.
If criticism and judgments have gotten us this far,
I wonder what will happen once we meet.
People by Kristina Madison
the smell of my flesh.. my pain.. right now..
Not thinking of tomorrow, but of the present time.. right now..
Digging into my flesh, I can see my eyes swell up as the tears start to drip down my pail, light blue face.
To love someone, is like starting an entire life over again, and trying to be made, once again.
Life is not about love, but about being free.
Being free is nothing more than getting away from a conformity.
Trying to be yourself, yet getting pushed down by others.
Everyone knows nothing about you, except for what they assume.
Your mind plays wondrous tricks on you, while they, they try sitting down to talk with you, to make you understand.
You; You do not listen, therefore, you learn nothing and still assume everything.
The light of a new day, just brings me more unhappiness than every before.
Even doing the things that I used to love, is nothing more than an everyday routine.
People don't care about anyone but their enemies.
That is why, no one has friends..right now..
Punk Rock Love by Kristina Madison
Punk Rock Love,
Between two teenagers,
Between you and me.
Punk Rock Love
Sitting on a couch,
Stuffing our mouths with food.
Punk Rock Love
Talking about Anarchy,
Long hours and nights on the phone.
Punk Rock Love
Going on and on about stupid stuff, and making fools of ourselves.
Not caring about anyone, but each other.
Punk Rock Love
Not being too serious,
Being able to joke around and have fun.
Punk Rock Love
Making a band,
Rockin' on the bass, and pounding on the drums.
Punk Rock Love
Going to concerts and getting high,
Head banging until we get too dizzy, and do it all over again.
Punk Rock Love
What a life we live,
What a life we live together.
Punk by Kristina Madison
You think everyone's a poser,
They all want to follow the trend,
But how'd you get into the Punk scene?
Did you follow someone,
Into the thrift store?
You say everyone's wearing the "Punk Uniform"
What about you?
I've seen you in plaid, and your hair dyed, MANY TIMES.
What about the spikes on your head?
Or the spikes around your neck and arms?
And what about the Anarchy deal?
A real Anarchist doesn't have anything.
A real Anarchist doesn't help the Government out by paying for anything.
Living their life is hard, It makes them hard-core.
What about the posers?
Where do they fall?
They fall in the same category as you
FUCKED!
Questions with No Answers by Kristina Madison
I knew I shouldn't have fell in love with you. I knew I shouldn't have let you love me back. I knew things weren't meant to be. Why do all the good things, turn out to me all the wrong ones? Why did we always seem to have so much fun? Why did it take me so long to realize that I was right? It should have only taken me a night. Why did I listen to you when you said you'd always love me? I knew it was all a lie. Life for me is dark and cold. I'm always going to be in my black hole of no return to the real love life. I'm always going to be alone. Alone without anyone by my side. Why did all things have to end up like this? Why didn't you listen to me when I said we'd never be the same? I can't believe I feel like this, just because of you. What is it that makes you so special to me? You'll never know how I feel because I can't let you think I'm like everyone else. I'm not like you, I'm just me, lost without your love.
Realization by Kristina Madison
And when will this all end?
It hasn't stopped for years, not even when I turned ten.
So many memories are in my head,
So when I open my eyes, all I do is dread.
Where were you when I fell down?
All you did was lie, and you made me frown.
I loved you, yes that I did.
Now, all I do is forbid.
I cannot get you out of my head,
You're all I think about when I lay in bed.
Pictures of us together seem like we could have lasted forever.
But when I think of it, I'm not surprised that it ended in never.
I always used to be happy before I found out the truth,
I never realized how hurt I could be, while I was still in youth.
Now, we have both moved on,
But everyone knows we still think of each other, even when we look at a swan.
We can still feel it in our hearts the feeling of love,
But we just need each other to give ourselves a nudge.
My heart has been rotting ever since we broke up,
But I guess the reason we did, was because we needed to grow up to remain tough.
When I listen to Music, it reminds me of the past,
Of how we could just lay for hours, in the grass.
The simple things make me think of us, and the love we once shared,
Now, I don't even know how I can bare.
I'm not good with expressing my feelings to the ones I love,
So, maybe you'll understand, with one simple hug.
Judging you is the last thing I would want to do,
But how can I not, when I am so blue?
Remembering Through My Memory by Kristina Madison
Remembering all the lies you have told me,
Remembering what they meant to me,
I open my eyes,
And realize I'm dead.
Yet; still wishing for the past to remake the future,
And hoping the melancholy of this agony would leave me;
I go on and forgive you; over and over.
Knowing you have control over what was once my own body,
You begin to eat the flesh of my warm skin by filling me with all of these lies; once again.
Gripping on to what I've lost in the months,
I begin to lose my balance again because you say those three painful, powerful words.
"I love you",
Is the deadliest set of words,
To tell a teenager in denial.
Snow by Kristina Madison
Damn you,
DAMN YOU!
Why won't you stop?
You're making my whole world fall apart.
It's not fair,
And I'm not there
To argue with you
Face to face.
Damn you
DAMN YOU!
You always pick on me,
At all the wrong times,
You're really mean.
I look at you,
and I can see right through you.
You're so cold,
Just a bunch of iciness.
You have no heart.
I hate you.
Damn you.
DAMN YOU SNOW!
<
Their Promise by Kristina Madison
You love to cause me pain
But you'll love me always, no matter what
So what if you give me a place to live,
There's room for me on the streets as well.
What about food and money?
I was too picky, remember? I never liked your cooking.
I can find a job. Maybe they will accept me for me, and not for what they expect me to be.
You will still always love me.
What about the suicide attempts? The starvation.
Do you still think you know me?
The place in my hear you're supposed to fill, why does it always feel so empty?
It's so empty like the blank stare in your eyes.
but I always end up being the bad guy
The mean one
The wrong one.
Because I didn't turn out like you
I didn't make the same mistakes
I made my own
They were always worse
When I'm in my room with the door locked, Music up high, lights off, you wonder what I'm doing, What I'm thinking
Or do you just walk by and assume everything's okay?
Or do you not like dealing with my annoying ways?
Yeah,
Some parents you are.
Verse 1:
When you go and say the world has turned on you,
Think of those who died,
And realize you're still alive.
You think you have it so terribly bad,
Think of the ones that have no home,
Think of the ones who have no Dads.
Chorus:
Running in circles
Trying to find out who you are,
Trying to find out where you belong.
You've got no life,
Because They own you.
Verse 2:
Trying to cry
Trying to find the easy way out.
Realizing there is none,
Then think you're not good enough for anyone.
Crying when you know you've done nothing wrong.
Trying to get attention that you have never won.
(Chorus)
Verse 3:
Trying to base your life on other's actions.
Blaming your unsuccessfulness upon others.
There's no where to run,
When you finally realize who you truly are.
(Chorus X2)
Things by Kristina Madison
There are so many things you dare not know about me, because I dare not show. Of what you do know, you automatically judge me. No one knows what it's like to be trapped inside my body. Many times I want to leave my life, into a dream of no return. Love hurts and breaks me. I don't understand why I just don't leave it be. Friends are deep in my heart. I may not show them I love them, but I do. The space between happiness and I, is far apart, to where I don't try to tamper with what life has to offer. What's the use to live, if you know you could die tomorrow? What's the use to love someone, and devote your life to that one special glimmering person, if tomorrow, they could leave your live completely? Reality and life is all about taking risks and chances. What if you take the wrong risk, and take one too many chances? Life is like a potluck dinner: Give a little someone, and you may be rewarded with someone worth your time and effort. Life is a lesson. A lesson that goes on for quiet sometime. You learn and experience things you might never had done, if you didn't take one too many chances, didn't take risks, didn't love someone, didn't hide certain things, don't have the wonderful relationship with friends, and didn't get upset once in a while. You need all these "things" like air. If you don't have air, you'd die. If you didn't have all these "things," you'd die. You wouldn't be normal without all these things.
Think For Yourself by Kristina Madison
And when will this all end?
This life I was born with,
Bores me.
Where's the trust you supposedly gave me?
Do those lies go with you to your grave,
As well as your lying soul?
You've let me down, That's okay
You're just like the rest of them.
You have no mind.
They control you.
They are your mind,
If you cannot trust your own mind
And spirit
Then how do you live?
You live the life of a thrifty stealer.
Your insecurity makes me laugh
My horrid laugh.
Your feeling of being unwanted makes me realize
I'm stronger then you.
Your strong hatred towards un-uniqueness,
Makes me who I am.
I feed off your hatred towards me,
Because of who I am.
You seem to think there is something wrong with my lifestyle,
Yet you don't take five minutes to try and understand me.
You live in a world of stereotypical judgments based on others opinions.
Yet you don't give your own mind,
One try.
Can you not think for yourself?
Or, are you just horrified of what you may end up with as your results?
Opinions are nonjudgmental ideas.
Assumptions,
Are false lies,
Waiting to be discovered.
Assumptions are like you,
You are scared to find the inner you,
That I've already found,
Of myself.
You go around trying to pose
So everyone will love you,
You cannot face the face that you're not alone.
There are a lot of other people out there just like you,
Wanting to be able to fit in-
Think for yourself.
Don't get pressured into a conformity.
You'll never find your own way out.
Out of hell-
Think for yourself.
Twenty-Five by Kristina Madison
On a certain day,
I will leave a note under the paperweight in my room.
It will uncover all of my lies,
While I tell each one of my friends and family members my very last farewell good-byes.
This pain and love affair has driven me insane,
And doing this is the only way to relieve the tension and pain.
I need to be with you,
I need to be left alone.
I can never decide which one I want more.
On a special day,
A certain anniversary,
I'll leave one note,
Explaining it all...
Understand by Kristina Madison
When I felt like I couldn't go on,
You made me believe in myself.
When I felt like dying,
You made me realize my purpose for living.
When I felt like giving up,
You made me feel stronger.
When I remembered how we once loved each other,
You reminded me of how our love is still strong.
Now, I feel like I'm deprived of your love, and I cannot bare to go on.
What am I going to do without you?
I seem so helpless without you,
And stronger when you're within my vision.
If I've never seen you,
How can I feel love this strong?
Digging deeper and deeper within my pale skin,
I feel the only way I can get through to anyone,
Is by pain.
I've been filled with so much hatred,
Hatred towards everyone and everything.
No one understands what I go through everyday,
With all of this awkwardness filled in my heart.
When people begin to open their eyes,
And notice I do not care what anyone says,
Will they begin to understand,
Everything,
And me.
Untitled by Kristina Madison
You end up with a broken heart, in a million different places. You know it's tearing you up inside, but you remain with it and hide. I do this because I love you. I want to be with you. Words cannot describe this harsh feeling I have for you. You hurt me, in every way possible, when you said you wouldn't. I think you're just like the rest of them; Just like everyone else. You tell me other wise. You bring me in your world of lies. A world that I cannot escape. I trust you because I love you, but, in the end, I get hurt just like you've done before. I can't forget about you, you're in my heart, in my mind, deep in my soul. It is you that I just cannot erase from my world. If I did, my life would fall apart, and you wouldn't be there to pick up the pieces like you said you would if this ever happened to me. You taught me not to love, not to trust anyone. I have never begun, to love someone as much as I do you. I just cannot believe that we're through. Yeah, yeah, we're through.
You by Kristina Madison
I sit here and wonder what it would be like to be sitting with you where you are.
I often go into my own world, and dream of us together.
I sit here and hold on to my precious blanket, wondering what it would be like if it smelled of your scent.
Looking at pictures, it seems like it's the only thing that's holding my fading life together.
Thoughts of us together in the near future are often scary, but yet I still dream of them frequently.
Holding the bears you once gave me through the mail,
wishing you would have been in the box, instead of your sweet letters.
Whipping the tears from my blurry red vision,
I begin to realize why I toucher myself so.
You're Weird by Kristina Madison
There's no time for love
It's not as a depressed world as you may think,
You need to leave what's done alone,
Crying's not going to make it any better.
"I Love You" is overrated,
Go out and find something original.
You have a life,
PLAY IT!
You have a life,
PLAY IT DAMN IT!
If you've got nothing better to do than to mope around questioning yourself why you're not good enough for him,
FIND A HOBBY!
Being someone you're not, for him,
THAT'S BULL SHIT MY FRIEND!
Do yourself a favor, and grow up.
Love's not for any of us individuals.
When I Was A Child by Kristina Madison
When I was a Child,
I never needed to pick out my clothes;
Only the TV Shows I watched.
When I was a Child,
I never needed to have money;
Only the pocket of my parents.
When I was a Child,
I never needed to make hard decisions;
Only to be part of them.
When I was a Child,
I never need to do chores;
Only the call of my Nanny.
When I was a Child,
I never had any responsibilities;
Only the help from my parents.
When I was a Child,
I never needed to fit in;
Only to stay with my true friends.
When I was a Child,
I never needed to decide who I loved;
Only watched that in the fairy tales.
When I was a Child,
The biggest problem I had was finding my blankie.
Now that I've grown up;
The biggest problem I have is finding myself.
