I admit it, what's to say?
I'll relive it, without pain
Backstreet lover on the side
Of the road
I got a bomb in my temple
That is gonna explode
I got a .16 gauge buried
Under my clothes, I play

Once upon a time I could control myself
Once upon a time I could lose myself

Oh try and mimic, what's insane?
I am in it, where do I stand?
Indian summer, and I hate the heat
I got a backstreet lover on the passenger seat
I got my hand in my pocket
So determined
Discreet, I pray

Once upon a time I could control myself
Once upon a time I could lose myself

Once upon a time I could control myself
Once upon a time I could lose myself
Once upon a time I could love myself
Once upon a time I could love you

Once...

Freezin', rests his head on a pillow made of concrete, again
Oh, feelin' maybe he'll see a little betters any days
Oh, head down, faces that he sees don't look it ain't that familiar
Oh, girlfriend he can't have when he's happy looks insane, oh yeah

Even flow
Thoughts arrive like butterflies
Oh, he don't know
So he chases them away
Someday yet he'll begin his life again
Life again, life again

Kneelin', looking through the paper though he doesn't know to read
Prayin', now to something that has never showed him anything
Oh, feelin', understands the weather or that winter's on its way, yeah
Oh, ceilings, people fall between all the legal halls of shame

Even flow
Thoughts arrive like butterflies
Oh, he don't know
So he chases them away
Someday yet he'll begin his life again
Whispering hands, carry him away
Him away, him away
Yeah

Even flow
Thoughts arrive like butterflies
Oh, he don't know
So he chases them away
Someday yet he'll begin his life again
Whispering hands, carry him away
Him away, him away
Yeah

Son, she said
Have I got a little story for you
What you thought was your daddy
Was nothin' but a
While you were sittin'
Home alone at age thirteen
Your real daddy was dyin'
Sorry you didn't see him
But I'm glad we talked

Oh I, oh, I'm still alive
Yeah I, oh, I'm still alive
Yeah I, oh, I'm still alive, yeah, oh

Oh she walks slowly
Across a young man's room
She said I'm ready for you
I can't remember anything to this very day
'Cept the look, the look
Oh, you know where
Now I can't see, I just stare

I, I'm still alive
Yeah I, oh, I'm still alive
Yeah I, oh, I'm still alive
Yeah I, oh, I'm still alive, yeah

"Is something wrong?", she said
"Of course there is
You're still alive", she said
Do I deserve to be?
Is that the question?
And if so, if so
Who answers?
Who answers?

I, oh, I'm still alive
Yeah I, oh, I'm still alive
Yeah I, oh, I'm still alive
Yeah I, mmm, I'm still alive
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...

She scratches a letter
Into a wall made of stone
Maybe someday
Another child
Won't feel as alone as she does

It's been two years
And counting
Since they put her in this place
She's been diagnosed
By some stupid fuck
And mommy agrees

Why go home?
Why go home?
Why go home?

She seems to be stronger
But what they want her to be is weak
She could play pretend
She could join the game, boy
She could be another clone

Why go home?...

What you taught me put me here
Don't come visit, Mother, screw me!
Why go home?... 

Ay...

Sheets of empty canvas
Untouched sheets of clay
Were laid spread out before me
As her body once did
All five horizons
Revolved around her soul
As the earth to the sun
Now the air I tasted and breathed
Has taken a turn

Ooh, and all I taught her was, everything
Ooh, I know she gave me all, that she wore

And now my bitter hands
Chafe beneath the clouds
Of what was everything
Oh, the pictures have
All been washed in black
Tattooed everything

I take a walk outside
I'm surrounded by
Some kids at play
I can feel their laughter
So why do I sear?

Oh, and twisted thoughts that spin
Round my head
I'm spinning
Oh, I'm spinning
How quick the sun can, drop away

And now my bitter hands
Cradle broken glass
Of what was everything
All the pictures had
All been washed in black
Tattooed everything
All the love gone bad
Turned my world to black
Tattooed
All I see
All that I am
All that I'll be
Yeah

Uh huh, uh huh, ooh
I know someday you'll have a beautiful life
I know you'll be a sun
In somebody else's sky
But why?
Why?
Why can't it be?
Can't it be mine?

At home
Drawing pictures
Of mountain tops
With him on top
Lemin yellow sun
Arms raised in a V
The dead lay in pools of maroon below

Daddy didn't give attention
To the fact that mommy didn't care
King Jeremy, the wicked
Ruled his world

Jeremy spoke in class today
Jeremy spoke in class today

Clearly I remember
Pickin' on the boy
Seemed a harmless little fuck
But we unleashed a lion
Gnashed his teeth and bit the recess lady's breast
How could I forget?
And he hit me with a surprise left
My jaw left hurtin
Dropped wide open
Just like the day
Like the day I heard

Daddy didn't give affection, no
And the boy was something mommy wouldn't wear
King Jeremy, the wicked
Ruled his world

Jeremy spoke in class today...

Try to forget this...
Try to erase this...
From the blackboard

Jeremy spoke in class today...

Hold on to the thread
The currents will shift
Guide me towards you
Know something's left
And we're all allowed to dream of the next
Of the next time we touch

You don't have to stray
The oceans away
Waves roll in my thoughts
Hold tight the ring
The sea will rise
Please stand by the shore
I will be
I will be there once more

What the fuck is this world
Running to? You didn't 
Leave a message
At least I 
Could have heard your voice one last time

Daily minefield, this could 
Be my time, 'bout you?
Would you hit me?
Would you hit me? 
Oh, oh

All the bills go by and 
Initiatives are taken up
By the middle
There ain't gonna be any middle any more

And the cross I'm bearing home
Ain't indicative of my place
Left the porch
Left the porch
Oh

Hear my name
Take a good look
This could be the day
Hold my hand
Walk beside me
I just need to say

Hear my name
Take a good look
This could be the day
Hold my hand
Lie beside me
I just need to say
Why couldn't I take?
I just want to be
I know that I would not ever touch you
Hold you
Feel you
Ever hold
Never again
Yeah...

The direction of the eye
So misleading
The defection of the soul
Nauseously quick

I don't question
Our existence
I just question
Our modern needs

I will walk with my hands bound
I will walk with my face blood
I will walk with my shadow flag
Into your garden
Garden of stone

After all is done
We're still alone
I won't be taken
Yet I'll go

I will walk with my hands bound
I will walk with my face blood
I will walk with my shadow flag
Into your garden
Garden of stone

I don't show
I don't share
I don't need
What you have to give

Oooh, I will walk with my hands bound
I will walk with my face blood
I will walk with my shadow flag
Into your garden, garden, oh

I will walk with my hands bound
I will walk into your garden
Garden of stone

I don't know
I don't care
I don't need
What you need to live

 
On the edge
A windowsill
Ponders his maker
Ponders his will
To the street below
He just ain't nothin'
But he's got a great view

And he sinks real deep, yeah
Oh, can't touch the bottom
In too deep, yeah
Aw, can't touch the bottom, oh

On the edge
Of a know-nothin' town
Feelin' quite superior
The aged come
To the sky above
He just ain't nothin'
But he's got a great view

And he sinks bay knot deep, yeah
Can't touch the bottom
In too deep, yeah
Aw, can't touch the bottom
In too deep

On the edge of a
Christmas clean love
Young virgin from heaven
Visiting
To the man above her
She just ain't nothin'
She doesn't like the view
She doesn't like the view
Doesn't like the view
But he sinks himself deep

Oh, can't touch the bottom
In too deep, yeah
Can't touch the bottom...

I see the world
Feel the truth
Which way to go
Windowsill
I see the words
On a rocking horse of time
I see the birds in the rain

Oh dear Diane
Can you see me now?
I am myself
Like you somehow
I'll ride the wave
Where it takes me
I'll hold the pain
Release me

Oh...

Oh dear Diane
Can you see me now?
I am myself
Like you somehow
I'll wait up in the dark
For you to speak to me
I'll open up
Release me...
Oh...

Back To Lyrics