Pub Message Archives 1-20

Failte! Welcome to the archives of the Online Irish Pub. This is your warning so please pay attention. This is about a pub, albeit online. If you get offended by foul language, sex, graphic explanations of bodily functions or by anything else you are likely to run into in a pub, please leave now. Drinking and babysitting don't mix. Thank you.

Re: Hello All! rubytuesdayschild (32/F/On the planet earth) 3/4/01 6:12 pm No, but your spelling might, you little freak .. not that I do any better anymore. Embarras .. embarass ... hmmm .... 'im bare ass ??? If 'im be me want to see! Hello Sexy, glad to see you! Long time no see and all that ... This Is a Reply to: Msg 280 by steve_reeve_1

Re: Hey .. where's gopads?????????????? gopads74 (45/M/Louisville, KY) 3/5/01 5:19 am I haven't vamoosed, I've just been lazy and not been on-line. Besides, vamoosing is illegal in Kentucky, they're VERY protective of their mooses. So you say you can't remember if you owe me a blow job or not? In that case yes, yes you do. :-) An Englishman, a Scotsman and An Irishman enter a pub together. As they enter three flies come in with them. They each order a pint of Guinness and as they're served a fly lands in each of their drinks. "Good heavens!" says the Brit, "I can't drink this". And he sets it aside. "Ah well." says the Scotsman as he removes the fly and starts drinking. The Irishman grabs his fly by the wings and starts hitting it on the back screaming "Spit it out, spit it out!" Thank you, you've been a wonderful audience. This Is a Reply to: Msg 279 by rubytuesdayschild

Re: Hey .. where's gopads?????????????? celticsimon (18/M/Ireland) 3/5/01 5:11 pm oh good, thought that joke might be INSULTING irishmen. but is not, cause ti true. ahem. yes. This Is a Reply to: Msg 282 by gopads74

Re: Hey .. where's gopads?????????????? gopads74 (45/M/Louisville, KY) 3/5/01 8:31 pm Well, we do enjoy our stout................ This Is a Reply to: Msg 283 by celticsimon

Re: Hey .. where's gopads?????????????? rubytuesdayschild (32/F/On the planet earth) 3/5/01 10:02 pm I always thought that the Irishman in the joke was the only one that showed a lick of sense. Of coures .. never mind. I'll get us all shot if I tell you that story. I like your pic, too, Simon. Quite the little cutie you are. Can I babysit you sometime???? This Is a Reply to: Msg 283 by celticsimon

Re: Hey .. where's gopads?????????????? rubytuesdayschild (32/F/On the planet earth) 3/5/01 10:05 pm Your stout what???? I'm sorry .. I'll get my mind out of the gutter .. and let yours float by! This Is a Reply to: Msg 284 by gopads74

"Once more for the linguistically challenged, he roars: Soldiers are we, whose lives are pledged to Ireland Some have come from a land beyond the wave, Some to be free, no more our ancient sireland Shall shelter the despot or the slave; tonight we man the Bearna Baoghal In Erin's cause. come woe or weal; 'Mid cannon's roar and rifle's peal We'll chant a soldier's song. We'll sing a song, a soldier's song With cheering, rousing chorus As round our blazing fires we thong, The starry heavens o'er us; Impatient for the coming fight, And as we wait the mornings light here in the silence of the night We'll sing a soldier's song In valley green or towering crag Our fathers fought before us, And conquered 'neath the same old flag That's floating o'er us, We're children of a fighting race That never yet has known disgrace, And as we march the foe to face, We'll sing a soldier's song Sons of the Gael! Men of the Pale! The Long watched day is breaking; The serried ranks of Innisfail Shall set the tyrant quaking. Our camp fires now are burning low; See in the east a silvery glow, Out yonder waits the saxon foe, So sing a soldier's song. "

Simon!!!!! steve_reeve_1 3/5/01 11:58 pm Did I ever tell you what Tratka said? I asked how come he never posts and he said he never saw anything worth responding to .. if he saw something worth responding to, he would. Then he (warning! warning! Lies commencing. Please do not attempt to adjust your set...) said that Irish Pubs are for fags anyway. He said that Johno likes to bend you over his cardboard palace every night. Even went so far as to throw in a few comments about what the name gopads_74 means .. but they were FAR too disturbing for even me to repeat. Something about grandma's and panty sniffers though .. Said my boots were whore boots too. I am quite sure they aren't, because I paid her damn good money to keep them. Anyway, so here we are all, knocking ourselves out to be entertaining to the b_st_rd (see, I CAN be polite!) and this is the fucking thanks we get! Perhaps we should all just discuss literature and the mean temperature of freshly microwaved bacon and how it all relates to Himalayan Mountain Goats and their sexual habits. Maybe that would interest the little blighter ...????????? Hmmm .... and, please, adjust my set! Kisses!

Re: Simon!!!!! steve_reeve_1 3/6/01 12:00 am That damn message was NOT from me: STEVE .. it was from Ruby. Last time I let her or the whore boots she walked in on into my computer room! She blows like a dream, gopads .. you'll be lucky to come out of it alive. There isn't chrome to be found on a trailer hitch ANYWHERE in her neighborhood!!!! This Is a Reply to: Msg 287 by steve_reeve_1

My plans for St Patrick's Day steve_reeve_1 3/6/01 12:06 am are to haul Ruby over to Ireland, and bend her over johnos cardboard palace .. thus preventing this war she has planned as well as providing many interesting photo ops for the touristy people. "Hah .. show that one to your Grannie back home!" .. grunt ... grunt ... Also giving her whore boots a reason for their existence as well as given her a reason to be less grumpy than she has as of late, and .. dammit .. it's just a fine way to make friends .. don't you think????

Re: My plans for St Patrick's Day steve_reeve_1 3/6/01 12:07 am Bite me, fag boy! Ruby This Is a Reply to: Msg 289 by steve_reeve_1

Re: My plans for St Patrick's Day steve_reeve_1 3/6/01 12:08 am I will .. I will .. be glad to do that too! This Is a Reply to: Msg 290 by steve_reeve_1

Re: My plans for St Patrick's Day celticsimon (18/M/Ireland) 3/6/01 3:54 pm all i can say is that i HOPE u two know each other, but that u ARENT brother and sister or related in anyway apart from marrige. and if trakta or what ever his name is wants to come and post a message telling us what he reckons of the pub is grand, otherwise, he can just shut up and de-join if he wants. boo-hoo. This Is a Reply to: Msg 291 by steve_reeve_1

Re: Simon!!!!! gopads74 (45/M/Louisville, KY) 3/7/01 5:27 am I would just like to point out that the whole thing about "grandma's and panty sniffers " was blown way out of proportion and that I haven't been involved in anything like that for weeks....days anyway. And Ruby, my stout has no chrome but perhaps something can be improvised? I think you could use a good tongue lashing and I am a cunning linguist. This Is a Reply to: Msg 287 by steve_reeve_1

Re: Simon!!!!! rubytuesdayschild (32/F/On the planet earth) 3/7/01 9:19 am And since when is being blown, way out of proportion, a bad thing???? This Is a Reply to: Msg 293 by gopads74

Re: My plans for St Patrick's Day rubytuesdayschild (32/F/On the planet earth) 3/7/01 9:26 am Maybe he's scared? You think? I think,maybe, if I were a more normal sort of person .. sssshhhudddderrrrrr ... what a frightening thought! But, if I was, I just might think twice about rubbing elbows with people who call themselves things like slapper saint. I did think twice about it, actually, and my elbows are all tingly now. But, that's beside the point. I have pointy elbows you know, incredibly pointy, and sort of knobby .. I may be a hermaphroditic troll! I am pretty sure I'm not .. but how can one be really a 100% certain? Is there a test for that???? Sorry, gone right off the subject! I think Trotsky is sc-c-c-arrrreedd of getting drawn into the seedy underworld of alleyway life, as it stands, listing slightly to the left, or falls down and rolls in the muck, come closing time. He's afraid if he talks to us, he will become like us ... and that's understandable. I talked to myself once or twice in my life and now look what's happened!!! This Is a Reply to: Msg 292 by celticsimon

Hey wait! rubytuesdayschild (32/F/On the planet earth) 3/7/01 9:29 am You can dejoin? Really? I thought this was like the militant left wing of the Bar Fly academy .. bar flies check in, but they don't check out. Or, like jail. Especially when I saw that johno spent so much time here. I didn't realize that you could actually CHOOSE TO LEAVE! Ah, what the hell .. I haven't finished my drink yet!

Joe's favorite form of recreation exercise is dancing Swan Lake, in toe shoes and tutu is dancing Swan Lake in combat boots and listening to Metallica is trolling for dogs by placing salami in the front of his trousers is trolling for pufters by hanging his salami out of the front of his trousers arm curls at the pub ".. and lift .. sip .. down .. lift .. gulp .. down .. lift .." chasing skirts realizing his mistake and leaving off the kilts, chasing real skirts swimming, fantasizing the whole body of water has been made by blonde sexpots in gold lamé panties carrying pint after pint quickly changing the fantasy to blonde sexpots with breasts when he realizes we caught onto him .. again ass kicking contests, wherein he usually scores just slightly less than that one-legged man ass kicking contests, wherein he usually wins .. against that one-legged man ass kicking contests, wherein he is the only participant

: Hey wait! celticsimon (18/M/Ireland) 3/7/01 3:40 pm HMMMM, not sure what kind of pubs u guys have in alaska, but ours let people go. sometimes. depends how much they are spending i suppose.... si This Is a Reply to: Msg 296 by rubytuesdayschild

Re: Simon!!!!! gopads74 (45/M/Louisville, KY) 3/7/01 9:02 pm Well, if you punctuate it like that...I guess it's a good thing. This Is a Reply to: Msg 294 by rubytuesdayschild

Re: Hey wait! rubytuesdayschild (32/F/On the planet earth) 3/9/01 10:16 am Oh I'm sorry .. basic misunderstanding due to cultural differences. Alaska IS a pub .. they let us out by throwing us in jail or worse .. making us go OUTSIDE. Ever see the movie Airheads? Steve Buscemi (however he spells it), Brendan Frasier (however he spells it), Adam Sandler (who cares how he spells it!) holding up a radio station??? One of the best lines ever in that movie, one I could really relate to and which I used when talking to Federal Agents. "I don't want anything .. I just don't wanna go outside." Or, maybe I am making that up! Could be. Let's go get my permanent record and see if I have a black mark for being a smart ass to the Feds. Gopads .. oh Gopads ... have you ever seen your permanent record? They do have them, you know. I saw some of mine once. Tried to get them to do a rewrite as they are really good at misinterpreting situations. But, then, they said that my interpretation of events was based on my experience and so wasn't relevant to their interpretation. Only .. since I knew that I was, for instance, standing on the street corner waiting for the light to change and then got really dizzy from a sinus condition and decided to wait some more, I really don't give a flying rat's ass about their interpretation of what a girl standing on the corner for over 15 minutes is likely to be up to. They could have at least said "she appeared to be .. " but no .. they said "she was engaged in the act of .." and that's not very interpretive, then, is it! Gopads .. we must fight for our right to stand on street corners and look at people funny! We must take it to the Supreme Court if necessary and have the freaking U.N. Troops called in to protect the good citizens of America against the heinous evil FBI .. or OVERLORDS as they are starting to ask to be called .. and their black markers of doom. No, wait. I don't really care. That's just me trying to cause trouble again. I really should be spanked for that! This Is a Reply to: Msg 297 by celticsimon

Gopads ... rubytuesdayschild (32/F/On the planet earth) 3/9/01 10:33 am this is a continuation of the previous message, sort of .. We must fight for our right to not really give a flying rat's ass what our government is up to. We should take it all the way to the Supreme Court! And have the freakin' U.N. Troops called in to protect us from Campaign Fundraiser groups, the sort of people who stand about saying things like "It is your duty as a citizen to vote!" and .. people who publicly suck breath mints. You know, the really loud kind of sucking, and click them against their teeth, flip them over with their tongue .. I am quite sure they should be right up against the wall. Are you one of those people gopads?? Anyway, I feel that if anyone really wanted me to vote then, 1, Alaska would actually be a part of the United States of America which any good California Public or Private Transportation Agency will tell you is simply not the case. Seriously. Call em up, tell them you need to get to Alaska and you need to do it now. I don't know about other states, but in Texas and California, I have tried this and the answer was "Ma'am .. there are no flights to Alaska. No, no bus goes there either. .. ma'am we are an AMERICAN company, we transport people to and from AMERICAN destinations. We could get you as far as Toronto. But, they won't be able to help you there either. If you want to get to Alaska you have to take the ferry. There are no roads or planes going to Alaska. Maybe you could fly to Russia and they would know how to get you there." ... This is serious. We used to entertain ourselves by calling up people in California just to hear them say this shit. Anyway, so, if they really wanted me to vote, they would make Alaska part of America. Then, they would start counting it's votes as valid somewhere in the electorial process. This isn't done, I am assuming, because we forgot to put the votes on the ferry in time to get them to Washington by the deadline and there are no telephone lines, fibre optic cables, electrical lines or the like which connect Alaska to the United States. Perhaps the pesky Russians have been recieving the votes instead, misinterpreting them and Chernoble( however they spell it) is really all our fault! Then, they would serve beer at the voting booths. Perhaps Tequila as well. For, how can one seriously expect a sober person to take a look at the possibles and go "Hmm .. this one looks good!"???? They would also ban all breath mint sucking fiends from voting. Hard to make a decision, even whilst drunk, while you hear all this sucking going on in the next booth. Also .. why do we have to pay 25 cents to see a film of the candidates before we make our choice? I thought voting was free! Unfortunately for me, I never had the 25 cents; so I couldn't vote anyway. Just stood there, in the dark, listening to people suck on breath mints and the low moans of ... oh my god .. that wasn't the voting booth, was it????

Ruby, Ruby, Ruby, Ruby, yeah.... steve_reeve_1 3/11/01 11:41 am Just heard that song again and thought .. wow .. now there is one babe who could explain quantum physics to me anytime! Just thought I would drop by and do some quick sucking up. Peace

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