HOW MANY MILES TO
THE FIFTH DIMENSION?

THE HIPPIE PSYCHIC..................by Coralynn

Daisy Moonbeam Freedom places four crystals on her forehead and closes her eyes. What she sees makes her sit up suddenly and reach for the phone.
Dialing 9-1-1, she's connected to a voice that asks what emergency she's reporting.
"I want the Chappaqua police," she tells the person in a voice dripping honey.
"The number there is 555-270-9955. Please make a note of it and try to avoid going through our phoneline, as it's reserved for emergencies, ma'am."
"You don't think this is an emergency? Look, Mr. whoeveryouare, I know where the body is buried!" she hangs up, hoping this information inspires the 9-1-1 operator to be more flexible in the future.
She reaches over to the end table and puts on her thick glasses.......then dials up the Police station.
"Chappaqua Police, Alan Carson speaking," is heard.
"I know where the body is buried!" she announces dramatically.
Alan has a splitting headache and can barely get out, "What body?"
"The one from that murder that's all over the newspapers! I saw where the body is buried......."
"The body has already been found, Miss, and it's not buried."
This information doesn't seem to penetrate Daisy's mind, as she goes on, "This woman was killed during a new moon, which can only mean that her body was dumped in a swamp, and I know which one."
Alan does something he almost never does. He hangs up on this person whose voice is still rattling away a mile a minute as the receiver goes from his ear to the phone cradle.

Daisy Moonbeam Freedom doesn't know the meaning of the word "no," and this little setback has no effect on her as she dons her fringed poncho, tossing it in the air, then diving for the middle so that it comes down over her head. She leaves her apartment and gets into her '75 VW Bug, which doesn't respond when she turns the key.
"Piece of garbage!" she yells at it, "I'm going to replace this hunk of scrap metal after the police pay me for solving the murder!"
The car eventually starts, and she drives it to the Police station, pulling in, barely coming to a stop before she leaps out, fringe flapping and lovebeads clanking as she makes her way to the door.

Alan Carson sees this apparition straight out of the 60s get out of a VW Bug covered in flowers and is reminded of those hideous flower stick-ons people used to use to make their bathtubs less slippery. Sighing, he asks George, "Care to handle this one? I don't think I have the patience!"
George sees a woman breeze into the station, beads swaying, fringe swaying, bra-less chest swaying and wishes he were somewhere else, anywhere else.
"I know where the body is buried!" she tells him straight out.
Travis yells from his jail cell, "YES!"
Alan glares at Travis. George ignores him. Daisy wonders who on earth this prisoner is and why he cares about the dead body. Oh well, whatever.
"I am a reknowned psychic," she tells George as she parks her considerable derriere on the chair beside his desk. "I spent twenty years in Sedona......you know, where that energy vortex is."
"Sedona? Vortex?"
"Yeah, you know, the place with the red cliffs and mountains and stones......ahhhhh someplace out west, I'm not sure which state."
"Arizona?"
She ponders a moment, "That sounds familiar!"
Alan can't help listening in. This woman is bizarre.
She goes on, "The murder happened during a new Moon, so the body is in water, a swamp, or if you don't have a swamp around here then a river, and if you don't have a river around here, maybe a creek, and if you don't have a creek around here, then a lake, and if you....."
Travis yells out, "YES!" again.
"What's with him?" Daisy asks.
"I'm a Police officer!" he answers in a loud voice, "Unjustly imprisioned for just doing my duty."
"A victim of the Establishment," she turns her gaze upon Travis, who is all but leaping through the bars of his cell.
Alan walks over to George's desk and takes over, "Madame, I'm sorry, but we already have an investigation in progress."
"You won't hire me to solve the murder?" she looks up in shock.
"Right. We won't."
She gathers together her voluminous skirt and grabs her enormous handbag, which clanks as the rocks and crystals within it jostle around. "I'll just have to do it on my own, then, do I hear you right?"
Alan tires to keep the irritation out of his voice, "We would appreciate it if you left this matter to us."
"Well!" she stands up and digs into her purse, pulling out a dog-eared business card, thrusting it at Alan, "When you're at your wits end, I can be reached at this number!"
"Take me with you!" Travis begs as she heads for the door. She tosses a look over her shoulder and replies, "All in good time." and the door closes behind her.

Travis paces the few feet he has available to him in the jail cell and thinks, "OK, so Montgomery's body isn't buried under the driveway at the house on Winding Willow. The bottom of a creek or swamp or lake would have been my next guess, and now this psychic woman comes in here to clinch it. I've gotta get out of here and soon!


BETRAYAL......by Terri

John tried to keep his composure in front of Officer Jeremy Pennypacker. He thumbed through the poems. "I am sure there is a logical explanation for these poems. Rosamond? You want to give Officer Pennypacker the logical explanation?"
Rose nodded. "I am afraid my husband didn't know about them."
John muttered, "No %$#@!"
Rosamond turned a brilliant smile on Jeremy. "I--I'm afraid the 'jig is up'. Officer, my husband and his brother do not get along. A few months ago, Daniel Gwinnett approached me with some poetry he had written. He has fanciful ideas of getting them published. I knew Miss Sheffield had publisher connections. So I gave them to her to see if she could have them published for Daniel. I really didn't care if she only had 50 or so copies published. Daniel could give them out to his many girlfriends. He fancies himself a Lothario. Anyways, I gave them to Tori and I think she must have accidently picked up my diary. We were in my--our--bedroom and it was laying on the table. It was an accident."
"Did Miss Sheffield have any success in getting them published?" Jeremy asked.
Rosamond reached out for the poems. "I'm not sure. I gave them to her last week."
Jeremy kept them out of her reach. "I'm sorry, Mrs. Gwinnett. These and the diary were found in the car of a homicide victim. We need to tag these and hold on to them for a while."
Rose was puzzled. "But--but they are my private property."
John tried to keep his face composed and was succeeding admirably. "Excuse me, Rosamond, dear. The diary is yours. But the poems belong to my brother. Is that what I am to understand?"
Rose coloured. "Yes. Of course. My mistake, darling."
Jeremy put the poems back in the folder. "I'll have to check these with Daniel Gwinnett, you understand. It's not that I don't believe you, Mrs. Gwinnett...but my superiors will require I verify this."
Rose blanched. "Yes. I understand."
Jeremy Pennypacker thanked them and left.

John very calmly turned on his heel and started up the stairs. "Coming, Rosamond darling?"
Rose very nervously twisted the ring on her finger. "Y-yes."
They headed up the stairs. John opened the door of their bedroom, standing aside for Rosamond to go in first, like a gentleman.
Rose very cautiously walked through the door. John closed the door and put his fist through the wall.
Rosamond jumped a mile and could not stop the erratic beating of her heart.
John stepped back and rubbed his hand. "Let me get this straight. Tori Sheffield got your diary by mistake when you gave her Daniel's poems to have published. Now, you are saying Daniel gave these to you to have published."
Rose nodded vigorously. "Yes. That's the truth."
John looked at Rose and said, "Bull%$#@!"

He said, "How stupid do you think I am, Rose?"
Rose looked at him imploringly. "She---she was blackmailing me, John."
John sat on the bed and looked steadily at his wife. "Let me get this straight. You have saved over 20 poems..."
"..there's 35.."
"Thirty-five of the most outrageous poems I have ever read. From my brother. To my wife."
Rosamond said, "I can explain..."
John shook his head. "No, I don't think you can." He got up and grabbed his keys.
"Where are you going, darling?"
John said, " 'Darling.' Under the circumstances, don't you think it is bad form? I have one question. Why did you save them?"
Rose stood there miserably and whispered, "I don't know."
John asked, "How long has this been going on?"
Rose said nothing. John repeated his question. "How long, Rose? One month? Two?"
Rose, in a small voice, said, "Two."
"Two months?"
Rose shook her head and whispered, "Two years."
John looked at her disbelievingly. "Two years. For the past two years, you have been harboring these verses written expressly to you from my brother. Rose, it defies the imagination. I think we have reached a turning point in our relationship."
He got up and threw a few things into a gym bag.
"Where are you going, John?"
John said, "Under the circumstances, I think I will be staying at the gym tonight."
"B-but how will that look to the police?"
John went into the bathroom and took his deodorant and shave cream. "Oh...I'm sure you will think of something, love. You always do."

Officer Pennypacker pulled up in front of the house on Elmwood. Here it is. The domain of Daniel Gwinnett, bard of Chappaqua. He heaved a sigh and got out of his car, walking up to the door.
He heard The Doors wailing out of the stereo
"Hello, I love you, won't you tell me your name? Hello, I love you, let me jump in your game..."
Jeremy waited for a break in the music and then rang the bell. Daniel answered the door, dripping wet and wrapped in a towel.
"Hey, Officer dude! Someone complain about the stereo being too loud?"
Jeremy couldn't believe his eyes. "JOHN?" he asked.
Daniel laughed. "John? Oh...didn't you know? John and I are INDENTICAL twins. Yes, very often we have been mistaken for each other. With some amusing and interesting results." He winked at Jeremy.
Jeremy flashed his badge and said, "Official police business, Mr. Gwinnett. May I come in?"
Daniel stepped aside, "Sure. Come on in. I'll be right out."
Daniel disappeared into his bedroom. Jeremy looked around. Beer bottles all over. Pizza box left on the coffeetable. CD's scattered around the room. A stack of Playboys under the pizza box.
Daniel came out of the bedroom, dressed in a sweatshirt and jeans. He walked over to the CD player and turned it down.
"So...can I offer you a beer?"
Jeremy shook his head. "I'm on duty."
"So what's on your mind?"
Jeremy looked steadily at Daniel. "Poems. And your brother's wife."

Daniel raised his eyebrow. "Ah! The poems! You found out about them?" Jeremy said, "Yes, we did. They were found in the car of Tori Sheffield. Along with a diary from your sister-in-law, Rosamond Gwinnett.
Jeremy got out a pen and his notebook.
"Would you mind answering a few questions?"
"Hell no! Fire away!"
Jeremy asked, "These poems. You gave them to your sister in law, Rose."
"Hell yeah. I thought they were first-rate! Guaranteed to melt an iceberg. And believe me, that woman is Siberian!"
Jeremy asked, "So you had someone special in mind when you wrote them?"
Daniel was puzzled but he said, "Well....yeah! They were meant for no one's eyes but hers. You know. To let her know she was in my, uh, thoughts. Ooops! Almost said 'dreams'!"
Jeremy said, "So you gave these poems to Rosamond Gwinnett for safe-keeping until you could have them published."
"Published? Hey, I never thought of that! Did she think they were good enough to be published?"
Jeremy was totally lost. "I don't know. She just got them last week." "Last week? Hell, I started sending them to her right after I got to really know her."
Jeremy said, "And that would be how long ago?"
Daniel said, "Two years ago."
"You knew Tori Sheffield that long?"
"Tori?"
"Yes. They were found in her possession. You gave them to Rose Gwinnett to see if she would give them to Tori Sheffield to see if she would publish them."
Daniel stood there and looked at Jeremy with amazement on his face. Then he burst out in racous laughter. "Oh, that's rich! That is priceless! That is the story Ro' gave you? Jeez, she thinks fast! I gotta give her credit on that one! Was John standing next to her?"
Jeremy said, "Yes, he was."
"And she gave you that cock and bull story about me wanting to PUBLISH those odes to my lady love?"
"Well...yes."
Daniel said, "Dude, have I got a tale for you! Sure you can't have a beer?"
Jeremy looked at his watch. "I am officially off duty in..three minutes."
Daniel laughed and said, "Miller or Bud?"


Daniel finished up by saying, "...and the whole jig was up when John came down and fell in the soup tureen! Let me tell you, that was a pretty wild scene!"
Jeremy sat there, drinking his Bud. "Then what happened?"
"She took up with Billy Bob Montgomery because the Gwinnett twins were just too hot to handle. Then she found out she was having a baby and didn't know whose it was. Now, I don't want to give the impression that Rosamond is a tramp. Because she didn't even know about me. I mean, that John had a twin brother. And, well, Montgomery IS a dynamic presence, kind of gives off a macho-tight-jeans-aw-shucks cowboy attitude but let me tell you, that dude is wily. Smart. A controlling SOB if I do say so myself. A stronger woman than Rose would have a hard time walking away from him. I suppose you know about the disappearing act he pulled."
Jeremy said, "I heard a little bit about it."
Daniel filled him in on the story.
"..so she got an annulment. And Montgomery shows up one half hour after the ceremony. Can you believe it? ONE HALF HOUR!"
Daniel popped open another beer for Jeremy. "I offered to run away with her the night before she married John. Wanted to take her to Iowa or Nebraska but she was having none of it. I told her she would be bored with John and come crawling back to me. On account of our daughter. Which she still denies is mine. So tell me, if she is NOT bored with John, why did she save those poems, huh? Answer me that one!"

Daniel continued to spill his guts about his relationship with Rosamond. "I just sent her poems as a way to let her know I was still around. A constant reminder of what we meant to each other."
Jeremy shook his head. "But she married your brother and from what I could see, they are in love."
Daniel snorted, "If she is so in love with John, why did she save them, huh? Wouldn't your average woman throw them away? Get enraged? Tell her husband? Rose did nothing of the sort. She squirreled them away in a place no one could find. So it just goes to show that deep...way down deep..she has feelings for me. She may even be harboring some residual lust for me."

Jeremy said, "And then Tori Sheffield comes along and threatens to blow Rose's world sky-high. By publishing the poems."
Daniel leaned over his bar in his living room and offered Jeremy some cashews.
"Yep. To the tune of 20,000 dollars for me and 30,000 for Rose. Don't know why the extra 10,000 for her. Maybe Tori liked me--maybe she saw me in a tank top and got turned on and cut me a break! Bottom line is this---I told her to go ahead and publish them."
Jeremy munched on the cashews and worked on the Chex Mix Daniel poured in a bowl. "Why did you want that?"
Daniel put the beer bottle cap on the edge of the bar and deftly snapped it off.
"So John would dump her. Rose is not a woman to be without a man for any length of time..."
"Define 'any length of time.'"
"...five minutes?" Daniel laughed uproariously at that one. "Hell, she still loves me. That's why she kept them."
Jeremy sat there, thinking. Right. I saw the woman. She was nervous as hell. She doesn't want to lose her husband. And now it turns out she was being blackmailed.
How very interesting!
He finished his beer and put his notebook back in the briefcase. "Hey, thank you, Daniel. You have given me a new perspective on this. Some things to think about. One thing, though..."
"Don't leave town?"
"No. Buy yourself a bottle opener! So long!"


THE SPECIALIST..............by Coralynn

Alan wonders why the murder specialist he requested has yet to arrive. He looks at the official papers that were faxed in that morning and re-reads them to be sure he didn't misunderstand.
Right. Should have arrived already. Name is A. Bennett. Abraham? Arnold? Andrew? Alonzo? he runs all the male names he knows that begin with "A."
There's a ruckus at the front door, which is not in his direct line of vision, so he walks out to the vestibule and sees a woman with wild blond curly hair, a huge dark blue overcoat, struggling with two oversized suitcases.
"Ma'am?" he looks at her and can't believe his eyes: it's Julie Christie the way she appeared in "Heaven Can Wait."
The woman has managed to kick the suitcases forward far enough so that she can close the door, then reaches into her satchel and pulls out paperwork. Sorting through it, she then hands a sheet to Alan and announces, "Abigail Bennett, reporting sir! Sorry to be late, but when you're given three hours to pack up your belongings and relocate several hundred miles away, it takes some doing! Now, where would you like me to begin?"
Alan appreciates her crisp no-nonsense manner and answers, "You'll be working with Jeremy Pennypacker, who will be returning"...he looks at his watch...."quite soon now. He's one of the brightest officers we've had the pleasure of having here in Chappaqua, but this is his first muder case in this location."
"You don't get many in this bucolic area, is that right?" she takes off her overcoat and hangs it up, which has been hiding a slim, agile body.
"I see from your orders that you came from Buffalo. Ahhh yes, snow capital of the world!"
"Not exactly, sir! Syracuse gets more snow, but for some reason Buffalo has become enshrined in everyone's mind as the city with the most snowstorms. However, it is one of the windiest places; much windier than Chicago, but since Chicago has become enshrined in everyone's mind as the city with the stongest winds...........there you have it."
"Interesting!" Alan comments but is stopped from asking any more questions as Jeremy returns to the station, slamming the door and commenting to no one in particular, "This muder case is getting bizarre!"
"Come in, Jeremy," Alan calls out, "You're specialist has arrived."
Jeremy enters Alan's office and when he sees Abigail he quickly whips off his hat and stammers, "Uhhhhhhh, hope you had a good trip," extending his hand. "Oh indeed!" Abigail clasps his hand in a firm shake and smiles.
"Miss Abigail Bennett," he reads from the official papers.
"Call me Abby!" she says crisply, "May we begin? Show we what you have on this so far..."
Alan can hear her voice fade out as she and Jeremy walk toward his desk.
Sonofagun, he thinks, Jeremy may not know it yet, but 'Abby' is a Godsend and in more ways than one. Look at them out there, with their heads bowed over Jeremy's evidence gathering reports. If I were asked to design a young woman for Jeremy, I couldn't come up with one that perfect.

Within an hour, Jeremy and Abby leave the police station and head out for the crime scene.
"We went through the house thoroughly, Officer Bennett, but I'm hoping you can spot something we missed."
"Call me Abby, and yes, I'm very good at spotting what others have missed, that's why I was sent here, to sniff out things that have no discernable odor, so to speak."

They soon arrive at the house, yellow crime tape draped over the yard and all the door entrances. Entering, Abby again looks through the initial crime report.
"You haven't found the weapon used for the blunt force trama," she states the obvious, "so, let's see...."
She carefully looks through every room of the house, starting with the upstairs, then when they enter the kitchen, she opens the refrigerator and, seeing nothing useful, whips open the freezer compartment. She immediately sees something interesting and carefully pulls out a good sized package of frozen meat.
Holding it up, turning it around, she says, "This is it!"
"Huh?"
"Yes. Look. The paper this potroast is wrapped in is broken on one side. Now, see the blood? Blood doesn't ooze from a hunk of frozen meat. Did you bring the evidence bags?"
Jeremy holds out a large bag, into which she places the potroast.
"Why did the killer return the potroast to the freezer?" Jeremy is confused.
"Because the killer was a woman. Women don't leave frozen meat out, a man might, but not a woman, plus she didn't want it lying around as evidence. Better get this over to the station before it begins to thaw," she suggests, "then we can go to Tori Sheffield's apartment."

Less than an hour later Jeremy and Abby enter the apartment occupied by the former Tori Sheffield, murder victim. It also has been sealed off with crime tape.
Wearing gloves, they start in the bedroom, carefully opening drawers, going through the closet, and looking closely at everything Tori owned, including the contents of her jewely box.
"This woman had expensive taste," Abby holds up a diamond necklace, "This must contain 10 karats at least. What did you say she did for a living?"
"She wrote for Architechural Digest."
"Well, unless she was part owner of that magazine, no way could she have afforded these," she also shows Jeremy some emerald and diamond earrings that look like small chandeliers.
He breaths out loudly, "Whewwww, those are incredible. But they could be fake."
"Nope. I know the real thing. My Dad has run a jewelry store ever since I can remember, and I used to work there every summer between school terms. I can spot a fake a mile away!"
She takes out a camera and gets pictures of the jewely, then slides it back into her pocket.
"How about the clothes in her closet, Abby? Are those expensive, too?"
Abby returns to the closet and takes a closer look, "Bingo! I'd say 80% of these clothes are designer labels!"
She jumps as she feels something rub up against her leg. Looking down, she sees a white cat. "A cat. Too bad the poor thing can't talk. We'd better take it in, too or it'll starve in this place."
They find no clues in the kitchen. Everything there is very ordinary.
"OK, the living room...." Abby heads straight for the end table with the drawer, "This looks like it could have something interesting....." she opens the drawer and picks up a small black book, similar to an address book.
"Now we have something!" she says, excitedly, "Look at this, Jeremy! See the names? See what she has written by each of the names?"
Jeremy whistles, "Abby, this looks like a list of blackmail victims! She's even chroncled every phone call she's made to these people."
"Right! We get a phone log from the phone company to back this up, and see who the last person she called was! This is definitely going to lead us to the perpetrator."
After looking over a few more things in the living room, they pick up the cat, let themselves out and drive back to the station.


WOODSTOCK REUNION.................by Coralynn

Celeste gathers up the newspapers William has left scattered over the kitchen, the dining room, even the living room. "Why can't the man ever put anything away?" she grumbles, then something catches her eye on a page that's rumpled, as he also fails to put the paper back in its original shape.
She adjusts her glasses and reads the ad, which is not large, but right to the point.
Madame Daisy Moonbeam Freedom, renowned psychic. Readings beginning at $150. 43987 S. Main Street, phone 555-9875.
She laughs, a-ha, so Daisy is living here! Haven't seen her in years! In fact, the last time was not long after we were at Woodstock! What a crazy girl she was! Wonder how she's doing now?
She tears the ad out of the newspaper, slips it into her pocket and finishes gathering up the mess William made, tossing the papers into the recycle bin.

She goes into her room to check her crystal ball to see how WandaSue and BB are doing in that invisible house.
She sees WandaSue sitting in the living room watching TV, cutting her toenails, little shards of nail imbedding themselves in the carpet. BB is yelling something in the distance. She listens carefully and hears, "You ate that whole box of Kraft Macaroni and Cheese, WandaSue? Now what am I going to have for lunch? Answer me that!"
"Don't bother me, BB. If you're hungry, you'll find something. By the way, I resent the fact that you took my post-it notes off my share of the food!"
"Your share? Hell, Wsue, you had those post-it notes on every stinkin' thing in the pantry."
These verbal snipings continue till Celeste tires of listening to them, at which time she re-covers the crystal ball with the dark felt cloth.
Retrieving the ad from her pocket, she dials the number given for Daisy, and hears the woman come on the line after the first ring.
"Madame Daisy Moonbeam Freedom, renowned psychic, speaking, how may I help you?"
"Hi Daisy, it's me Celeste. We were together at Woodstock, do you remember?"
"Celeste? Ohmygod, I can't believe it. After all these years! You living in Westchester County or are you calling long distance? You sound close, so my guess is that you live around here. I just moved here last week from that energy vortex place out west, you know? Lived there for twenty years. Got to the point where the energy vortex was so strong it was giving me migranes. This area is a lot more lowkey, energy-wise, ya know? So I read in the newspaper where they had this grisly murder, and offer my services, well not exactly offer, I do mean to charge, but anyway, I phone the Police, then go over there and they turn me down flat. I know where the body is buried, too, but do they want to know? Are they the least bit curious? No! Too "establishment," that's what they are. One Cop seemed real interested, but they had him locked up, now why do ya suppose they did that? Because he's too evolved is my guess! Would like to find a way to bust him out of that jail cell. The body has to be in water.....creek, swamp, lake, river, whatever. Murder occurred on a New Moon, and you know what that means!"
"I do?"
"Sure! Means the body was stashed in water!"
"Ohhhhhh."
"So I'm going to solve the murder anyway. When I do that I'll be written up in the newspaper and business will be lined up around the block......people will stream over here to get readings. Happens every time!"
"You've solved other murders?"
"Welllll, kinda. But this one is so clear! That woman was shot in the back of the head, then dumped into a body of water. I saw it clear as glass in my mind while I was meditating."
"But the Police say she was stabbed......"
"How ya gonna believe, the fuzz or me, Celeste, ya know?"
Celeste is getting very strong vibes over the phone that Daisy Moonbeam Freedom is round the bend, seriously round the bend.
"Well, it's been good talking to you," Celeste prepares to end the conversation.
"We have to get together soon!" Daisy doesn't pick up on the clue, "I'll come see you! What's your address?"
The thought of introducing someone so obviously unstable gives Celeste the shudders, "I'll meet you at the coffeeshop on Main Street tomorrow at noon. How's that?"
"That's the best you can do? Hey, I need you to help me get clientele. If I come to your house you can give me a list of prospects. Anyone else live with you?"
"No," Celeste lies.
"Well, make out a list of people you know. This area needs a good pyschic, I can tell. You were never any good at it, and I assume you still aren't. Too namby-pamby to really get psychic breakthroughs, ya know?"
Celeste shakes her head and decides not to respond to that last statement. "See you tomorrow, then," she says and hangs up before Daisy has any more insults to throw at her.


HOW'S THAT WORKING FOR YA'?.......by Terri

John picked up his gymbag stuffed with clothes. Rose could only sit there silently and miserably watch him zip it up. The look on his face kept her from saying anything. He turned to look at her. "Sometimes I don't even know who you are, Rosamond."
Rose said softly, "I am your wife, John. I love you."
John said, "I can't even begin to fathom why you kept those poems, Rose. I can excuse Daniel, he has no scruples or morals. But you. That's another story. You promised to forsake all others when you married me. Was that all for naught?"
Rose stood up and put her arms around John. "I'm so sorry, John. You must believe me. I love you."
John gently disentangled her from him. "If this is your idea of love, Rose, heaven help us."
He walked to the door and opened it. "I am going to the gym and I am staying there overnight. I would appreciate it if you didn't call me or try to contact me tonight."
Rose could only stand there and nod slowly.
"What shall I tell the children?" she finally asked.
"Tell them I am out of town. I got called away. You'll come up with an excuse. Only trouble is, Will will only believe you so long."
He went downstairs and saw Eleanor in the kitchen.
"Where are you going?" she asked.
John said, "I am out of here."
Eleanor said sharply, "Why?"
John said, "Ask Rose."
He went out the door, into his Corvette and out the driveway.

Rose absentmindedly put things away in their bedroom. Julie was waking up from her morning nap. She looked up at Rose with her big blue eyes. "Ma-ma!"
Rose picked her up and laid her cheek against Julie's. "Yes, sweetheart. Mama is here." And a tear trickled down Rose's cheek. Julie put both her hands on the side of Rose's face and said, "Da-da?" She looked around. Rose burst out sobbing. "Oh, sweet pea, it will be OK. Mommy's here."

John went into his office and put his gymbag next to his desk. He flopped down in his chair and stared out the window. Rafe came in. "I cleaned the showers and updated the computer files, boss. I'll be back in a few hours."
"Thanks, Rafe. I appreciate you opening up. I couldn't have done it without such a great bunch of guys to help me."
Rafe looked at John's troubled face. "Uh oh! I don't like the look on your face. That thundercloud above your head can mean only one....hey, what's this?"
John kicked his gymbag under the desk. "Nothing." Rafe sat down. "You, my friend, are talking to the King of screwing up relationships. If I had been a different kind of guy, I might still have Bess. Now she's seeing Slim. A great guy, don't get me wrong. So, John, if you want to talk it out, I'm here."
John shook his head. "Can't. But thanks anyways, Rafe."
Rafe stood up and picked up his car keys. "OK. But don't forget one thing I learned, John."
"What's that, Rafe?"
"They are a whole 'nuther breed. Don't try to figure them out. Not if you value your sanity."

Rose spent most of the day cleaning the bejeebers out of the bedroom. She went through her closet and threw out most of the clothes. She weeded through her shoes, her purses, threw out old makeup and reorganized the drawers and her jewelry. She started on the bathroom and scrubbed the tub so hard the porcelein was in danger of going down the drain. She even took an old toothbrush and scrubbed the grout.
When she finished and it was gleaming, she headed on to Will's room. She bagged his old toys while he wasn't there, rearranged the furniture, sorted through his clothes and even cleaned out his fish tank.
Celeste caught her as she was heading to do a major purge of Julie's room. "Rosamond, dear? Are you allright? Why the sudden interest in the domestic arts?"
Rose pushed the stray hair that escaped her ponytail out of her face. "Whatmakesyouthinkanythingiswrong?Everythingisjustducky." She ran on a sentence. "I just felt like cleaning."
Celeste said, "Allright, dear. Don't wear yourself out."

After six hours of cleaning, Rosamond exhausted herself. Dinner was a very quiet affair, peppered with polite convesation and pointedly ignoring the fact that John was not there. Which led Rosamond to the conclusion that Marilyn had filled the rest on the reason John was gone. This made her embarrassment even that much more palpable.
Rosamond gave Julie a bath and helped Will with his homework.
"Where's Daddy?" Will asked.
"Working late." was Rosamond's terse reply. After the children were settled, Rose went downstairs.
"I'm going to the mall. I have to get Julie a spring coat and Will needs shoes. The mall is only open for another two hours so I'll be back by then."
Celeste said, "Sure, dear. You be careful."
Rose nodded silently, slipped into her leather coat and walked out the door.
William frowned. "I don't like her going out in the mood she is in." Celeste patted his knee and handed him his after-dinner brandy in the living room.
"Not a whole lot we can do about it, William. She IS a grown woman. Capable of making her own decisions."
Eleanor said, "Yes. And with disastrous results."

After buying Will some shoes and Julie a few things and herself a new sweater, Rose found herself driving by the Dew Drop Inn. She parked and went inside. Why not? she reasoned. I knew half the people in here when I was married to you-know-who and they liked me. They were MY friends, too.
She sat at the bar. "Hi, Hank!"
Hank leaned over and grinned, "Well, as I live and breathe! Tequila Sunrise!"
Rose felt an unexpected warmth rush over her. I had almost forgotten about that silly nickname! she thought.
"Well, I'd like one, Hank!"
"Coming right up!"
She sat there sipping it. Why did I come here, she wondered. Did I hope to see him in here? To salve my wounded pride? She motioned to Hank. "Another one please, Hank."

Bethia sat there with Marilyn, Eleanor and Celeste. She exclaimed, "We can't let this go on! Not again!"
Eleanor said, "Not a whole lot we can do. We can't lock them in the cellar again."
Bethia said, "The mall has been closed down for a few hours. She's not answering her cellphone. I'm worried. Where can she be? If anything happens to her, I hold John and Daniel responsible."
"What about your crystal ball, Celeste?"
"It needs to charge. I forgot to put it on charge last night. It's plugged in but needs a full eight hours to charge."
Bethia reached for the phone. "Well, I know who will find her!"

John stayed busy throughout the day. It was merciful for both that Daniel was off today. I don't think I could keep from punching his lights out, John thought darkly.
He cleaned his office and went through old papers and defragged his computer and arranged his files. He spent alot of time hitting the 'delete' button. He finally worked up enough nerve to look in Daniel's desk drawer. The notebook was gone.
The gym finally closed for the night. John went to the small room in the back. It was outfitted with a bed and small dresser with a lamp. It was there for any of the guys to stay at when they had to open the gym early and didn't feel like coming in early.
John took off his jeans and sweater and laid down on the bed. Sleep eluded him.

Rosamond sat at the bar and sipped her Tequila Sunrises, trying to work up the nerve to go home. She asked Hank casually, "So, Hank..have you seen Billy Bob lately?"
Hank scratched under his chin. "Funny you should mention that, the news had something on about the house disappearing."
Rose said, "That big ranch? Are they crazy? How could a whole house disappear?"
"Dunno. But he hasnt' been in here in about two weeks. Figured he must have gone on vacation. Maybe went out to Texas to see his folks."
Rose sat there feeling totally alone. A voice from behind her said, "I once asked you for pizza and sex. You didn't like pizza. Any of that changed?"
Rose turned around and said, "SLIM!"

John still tossed and turned. He couldn't turn his thoughts off. He ran everything through his head over and over again. Everything from Tori Sheffield's murder to the poetry. Trying to make sense of it all. Finally he sat up. Only one thing left to do.
He put on his jeans and sweater and pulled his boots on. He struggled into his coat and found his car keys against the wall where he had thrown them. He got in his car and drove down the highway.
He pulled up to the house and parked. The porch light was still on. He rang the bell. When the door was answered, he said very quietly and plainly, "I need to talk to someone."
The door opened and John was ushered inside.
"Well, that's what fathers are for. What's on your mind, son?"


FINDING BB..................by Coralynn

Jeremy Pennypacker, Abby and Alan are discussing the day's events. Jeremy describes the interview with Daniel, and adds, "I need to interview as many people as I can to get a good feel for Rose's relationships, and hopefully get some insight. If I could only find that William Robert Montgomery, who was after all married to her for some time.......that would help, but he's missing, right?"
"He seems to be," Alan muses, "however, he came up missing one other time and come to find out had been in Paris while we were beating the local bushes trying to find out what happened to him."
"Plus," Abby adds, "his house has disappeared? That's just bizarre! What if he's in that house or was?"
Alan ponders how much to divulge of the strange goings-on in the town, especially at the big house on Winding Willow. He plays his cards close to his vest and simply tells them, "I have an idea. You two go to get some shut-eye, and I'll fill you in tomorrow morning if I get a break-through."
"Sounds good to me!" Jeremy smiles, "I appreciate your help, Alan, even though you aren't supposed to be working this case."
"Well, Jeremy, I want to find the murderer. Tori was a friend of mine."
Jeremy's heart goes out to the other man. 'A friend of mine' hardly covers the relationship. Jeremy knows that Alan and Tori had been dating for a couple months.

After Jeremy and Abby leave, Alan picks up the phone in his office and rings up the big house. Eleanor answers.
"Hi, Eleanor, this is Alan Carson. May I please speak with Celeste?"
"Celeste?!" Eleanor is suspicious.
"No, she's not a suspect. I just need to speak with her."
He hears her lay down the phone, and in a few minutes hears Celeste pick up an extension.
"Celeste here."
"Hi Celeste. I have a favor to ask you. Do you have any knowledge concerning the whereabouts of the house out at the Montgomery ranch?"
"Why do you need to know, Alan?" Celeste is hesitant to tell anyone that she made the house disappear.
"Jeremy is heading up the investigation on the Tori Sheffield murder case...."
"I know, dear, I'm so sorry about that....."
Alan tries not to let Celeste's sympathy get to him emotionally and replies, "Jeremy needs to interview Montgomery, and having him missing, plus even his house, is hampering his investigation. Can you let me know if you find out anything?"
"I certainly will. Take care, and I'll call you later."

"Marilyn," Celeste says in a muted voice, "can you come in here, dear?"
"Sure! What's up?"
Celeste closes the door. "Having the Montgomery house and BB invisible is hampering the murder investigation. I'm going to have to find an antidote for it tonight. Can you do me a huge favor?"
"Of course, anything for you, Celeste!"
"Can you drive out to the Montgomery ranch, be sure to take your cellphone with you, and let me know when it reappears? I'm going to try some spells to make it appear, but I have to know if any of them work."
"No problem. But it's dark out........oh, I get it, if I train my car headlights on the house I'll be able to see it.......or not."
"Exactly."
"OK, then, I'm outa here!" Marilyn grabs her cellphone, throws on her coat and is soon heard driving away.

Celeste flips through her book of spells.........."hmmmm, an antidote for disappearing things...........ahhhhh.......this one is a possible."
She chants the words and waits to hear from Marilyn. Nothing yet; maybe Marilyn hasn't arrived out there yet. Celeste looks through the book to see which other spells might also work, waiting for word from M. A few minutes later her phone rings and she quickly answers, "Marilyn?"
"None other! Hey, the house is still gone."
"OK, then let me try another one. Stay on the line."
Marilyn hears Celeste saying some odd words, then sees just the roof of the house materialize. "I see the roof, Celeste, but nothing more."
"Hang on, here's an even better spell....." Celeste chants some more and Marilyn sees the back half of the house.
"The back half is now visible.......you're on to something."
Celeste does the same chant, but in reverse order, which takes some doing.
"Bingo! It's back!" Marilyn tells her cheerily.
"Whew! I was afraid I wouldn't be able to pull it off. Thanks, Marilyn, now come on back. I'll brew us some tea."

MEANWHILE:

BB awakes with a jolt. Something odd is going on, he thinks, I just felt a force move through the house. What now?!
He puts on his robe and descends the stairs where he sees WandaSue sprawled out on the couch surrounded by empty Kraft macoroni and cheese boxes. She hears him and stirs, "Ahhhhh, my legally wedded husband is paying me a conjugal visit?"
"Hardly!" he says sharply as he walks to the front door and tugs on it, fully expecting it to be shut tight as it's been for the last two days. Instead, it opens suddenly, throwing him back into the room.
"What's that you're doing, love of my life, trying to escape again?"
"The door opened, WandaSue, scumbag of my life! You can leave now. Clean up the mess you've made first and get the hell out of here!"
"I have no car with me, babydoll, so if I depart, you'll have to drive me home."
That thought doesn't appeal to BB one bit; being trapped inside a vehicle with his worst nightmare, so he responds, "In the morning you leave. No, I'm not driving you home. You must have some friends around here somewhere. Let them do it."
As he then goes back upstairs, WandaSue racks her brain..........friends? What friends? When the going gets tough, Sally and Penelope dump me. Talk about your fair-weather friends! So how'm I to get to Pleasantville? I have no coin to take me there. Hmmmm, I have my purse. I'll have to take a taxi, I guess. It's pretty sad when the only human you can rely on is some stranger driving a taxi cab.

MEANWHILE:

Marilyn rushes back into the house, tossing her coat on the coat-tree.
"Been someplace?" Eleanor inquires.
"Just went out for a pleasant drive," Marilyn replies with an enigmatic smile on her face.
Eleanor looks at William who shrugs and comments, "I don't have a clue what goes on in this house anymore, Eleanor. Used to be our 'family' checked out everything with me before they did it, but now they just run around doing God knows what on their own, then, when they get in big trouble, then they come to me for help."
Feeling used, William?" Eleanor laughs.
"You laugh, El! Go ahead, but remember, I'M the Conqueror. I'm the one responsible for bringing all of you to this century. Well, almost all of you. I would have definitely vetoed the idea of that uptight Puritan nympho.......whats-her-name!"
"Grace?"
"Yeah, that one!"
"But, William, if some of us hadn't gone off on our own, we wouldn't have Marilyn with us."
"That was one of your better ideas," he concedes as he gets up from his chair with the lever on the side, "she's a delight."


BACK AT THE DEW DROP INN......by Terri

Slim took the seat next to Rose at the bar. "Come here often?" he said.
Rose smiled faltingly. "What a surprise!" Slim looked at her glass. "Want another?"
Rose nodded. Slim signaled for Hank to give him another Tequila Sunrise. "And I'll have a Scotch and water."
Hank put the drinks down on the counter. Slim smiled at Rose and said, "Why don't we take these to a table? It's been a long time since I talked to my best girl!"
Rose laughed, "Wouldn't that be Bess?"
"Aw, Bess is my girlfriend, you are my best girl! You believed in me, Miss Rose, when I was rough around the edges."
Rose said, "A diamond in the rough, Slim. That is what you were."
Slim stood up and nodded over to the tables. "Come on, let's get a table and visit. Just the two of us!"
Rose stood up. "Alright, but I need to 'powder my nose'."
Slim said, "And don't sneak out the back like you used to, Rose. I'll be waiting right here."
She nodded and disappeared down the hall.
Slim whipped out his cellphone and punched in a number. "I found her."
"Thank God! Where?"
"The Dew Drop Inn. She's not plastered or anything. At least not yet. But I can tell she's in bad shape emotionally. Look, she left her car keys on the bar and I took them. I'll stay with her and she'll be safe. I promise you that."
"You're the best!"
Slim continued, "I can take her home but if she doesn't show up tonight, don't worry. She may want to talk and I'll take care of her. I'll call you later."
"Thanks a million! We owe you!"
Slim said, "No, you don't. She's a good friend and she would do the same for me. Now, I've got to go. She's coming back."
CLICK!

Bethia turned to the rest of them and said, "Slim found her. She's safe and with him. He'll take care of her."
William huffed, "That's a relief!"
Eleanor fumed, "I am so mad at John I could strangle him!"
Bethia looked wide-eyed. "Whatever for?"
Eleanor said, "I think John is making too much out of those poems. So what if Daniel wrote her some poems and she kept them? I did the same. Troubadours were always writing songs and poetry for me and I kept them. Big deal!"
Bethia said, "You mean Henry didn't care?"
Eleanor burst out laughing in cynical laughter. "Care? The man had mistresses all over the place! He esconced Rosamond at Woodstock, which was my vacation home. Fortunately for both him and her, he never 'entertained' her in the Queen's chamber. But Rose and I put all that behind us and she is one of my best friends now. John is acting too priggish over it and he'd better watch it or he will have me to deal with!"
And with that, Eleanor left the room.

MEANWHILE, ACROSS TOWN:

John looked around the living room. "Marilyn has really fixed the place up, hasn't she?"
Rhys said, "Yes, she's a wonderful woman. She and Moose are very good friends."
"Just friends?"
"From what I can see, although I don't think Moose would mind kicking it up a notch. But you didn't come over to talk about Moose and Marilyn."
John sat down and ran his hands through his hair. "I'm staying at the gym."
Rhys looked at him and said neutrally, "I guess it takes a lot of your time, doesn't it?"
"Dad, you don't understand. I haven't exactly left Rose, but I need some sort of separation."
"Uh, huh," Rhys said. "I'm here to listen if you want me to. But first let's get something to drink and relax."
John said, "Where's Moose?"
"He went to the library to do some historical research. I expect he will be back late."
Rhys took a couple beers out of the fridge and grabbed some pretzels. "Now---what's going on? That is, if you want to talk. If not, we can just sit here."
John said, "It's my brother and my wife."
Rhys just raised his eyebrows and didn't say a word. John explained about the poems and Tori's murder and everything that transpired between him and Rose.
"I just couldn't stay there and pretend that everything is just fine. I have been battling this smoldering fire between Rose and Daniel for so long, Dad. I am just tired. It's like waiting for the other shoe to drop. Especially with Rosamond's background."
"Background?"
"Dad, didn't you know? She's Rosamond."
"Yes?"
"Rosamond de Clifford. Dad, she was Henry the Second's main squeeze in another lifetime."
Rhys said calmly, "I didn't know that." He knew he had to listen more than talk because that is what John needed.
John continued. "I don't know what I should do. I don't know if I should bail out before Rose and Daniel cuckold me or if it is nothing and I am building it all up in my mind."
Rhys asked, "How long have you been in love with Rose?"
"Since the day I rescued her from the Constable in Southold."
"How long has she been in love with you?"
"She SAYS since the first time she saw me."
"Do you believe her?"
"Hell, Dad, I don't know."
"What does your heart tell you, John. Not your head. Your heart."
"It tells me I've been betrayed."
"Have you?"
"Hell yes."
"Is it because Daniel wrote the poems or because she saved them? Which hurts more?"
"I never trusted Daniel even when we were kids. He coveted everything that was mine. Toys...wenches...listen to me! Wenches! You would think I was back in the 16th century! He even covets my Julie. No, Dad, it was the fact that Rose saved those poems. She hid them where she thought I would never find them. And I probably never would have. I just wonder how many times she took them out and read them."
Rhys sat there and waited for John to continue.
"I think I need to step back for a bit. If she never saved the poems, Tori Sheffield would not be blackmailing her and would never have been at the house. Maybe she wouldn't have been murdered."
"You don't suspect Rose of murder, do you?"
"No, of course not. But I can't help but feel they contributed to the whole situation. Rosamond and I didn't need this. We were ready to move in our own house and start a REAL life together. A place to raise our kids and let the dogs run and now it is up in smoke. And Daniel will always be there. Lurking in the background."
John stood up. "I'd better go. Thanks for your advice, Dad."
Rhys walked him to the door and clapped him on the shoulder. "Any time, son."
As John pulled out of the driveway, Rhys thought to himself, I don't remember even GIVING him any advice. And -- the thought came to him -- he called me DAD.
Rhys then smiled to himself. My son came to me for help and advice! Who'd have thought of it? A pirate giving marital advice? Rhys smiled to himself as he picked the bottles up, throwing them away and turning the porch light off.

Rosamond and Slim took their drinks to the table and sat down.
"So how are the kids?" Slim asked.
"Fine. Julie's got six teeth now. She's walking. Will is reading at a third grade level and he is only in kindergarten."
"How's the house coming along?"
"Well, we WERE almost done with it. I decided to remodel the uh, the kitchen on account of, well...I just think it needs something else."
"How's Planet? You back to work on it yet?"
"Marty is gearing up for a big storyline for me. Probably next month. How are things with you, Slim?"
"I start classes in a few weeks for radiology. Who would have ever thought it? Me! Slim who came to town less than a year ago in a monster truck looking to blackmail Billy Bob Montgomery! Now I am in college, have a decent girlfriend and I am sitting in this cocktail lounge having a drink with a top actress!"
Rose looked around. "Well, not exactly a cocktail lounge. That evokes images of fur stoles, cigarette holders and champagne cocktails. Here it is denim jeans, cigarettes and beer!"
Finally Slim said, "We've been avoiding that one question."
"I've noticed, Slim."
Slim nodded. "So I'll ask it and get it over with."
"OK"
"How's John?"
And with that, Rose started to cry.


COFFEE HOUSE CONFAB............by Coralynn

"Let's duck into this coffee house, Abby."
"Good idea. I could use a cup, and we need to digest what we've learned today."
They enter the coffee house and take a booth near the back.
Flinging their coats down, they slide in opposite each other and stretch their arms upward. Jeremy laughs, "You do that too?"
"Always have. You and I may be part cat!" she laughs back.
The waitress hurries over and takes their orders of coffee and sweet rolls.
Abby shakes loose her voluminous curls and looks intently at Jeremy, "You know, as much as Rose Gwinett looks like a suspect, I feel in my bones that she's totally innocent. Have you ever met her, Jeremy?"
"Yes, I have. There's something very gentle about her, vulnerable even. Now, I know you can't judge character just by meeting someone, but somehow I know she's innocent. What we need to do is prove that; strike her off the list of suspects."
"Looks like she had plenty of reason to want Tori Sheffield out of the way, though," Abby muses as the coffee is placed before them, "however, we haven't even begun to investigate the other names in that black book Tori Sheffield was keeping. My instincts tell me it was one of them."
"In the morning we'll start in on that," Jeremy says, "Rose can't be the only one with a motive."
"Exactly. Alan Carson told me you've only been here for a few weeks. Where were you before that, Jeremy?"
"L.A. Terrible place, horrible. The drug dealers use the Police as target practice out there."
"I've heard that. So you come here and voila! you get a murder case."
Jeremy grins, "Ironic, isn't it? I was hoping the only official duties I'd have here would be writing up speeding tickets and retrieving cats from trees."
"I grew up in Buffalo, and this is my first assignment anywhere else. That city has it's share of problems.......murders not uncommon, but at least I honed my skills....."
"Razor sharp?" Jeremy finishes her sentence. "I'm glad you're here because I think you're going to crack this case. Plus, I need a partner. Hard to use Alan as a sounding board because he and Tori were dating and he's in a state of shock and grief. That's why he deferred the investigation to me........and you."
Abby reaches across the table and pats his hand, "Glad to help you out, Jeremy! I think we're going to be dynamite!"


EGGS & ED WOOD, TOO.....by Terri

Slim held Rose's hand and said quietly, "Rose, I'm going to take you out of here. Let's go."
She tried to stem the flow of tears. "Wh-where?"
"I don't know. Let's just go. We'll lock your car up." He grabbed her hand and hoisted her up. He helped her into her coat and slipped his on. Slim gently held her hand and opened the car door for her. As the car ignition turned over, he said, "I'm going to take you out to eat."
Rose said, "I'm not hungry."
"Honey, when did you last eat?"
Rose just shrugged. "Another lifetime ago." She tried to hold her tears back but was unsuccessful.
"Slim? Do you think some people are doomed to screw up time and time again? Happiness is handed to them and they are cursed?"
Slim said, "No, I don't. I think outside influences have always been at work in stuff like that. At least with you and John."
Slim turned down a dirt road. He parked the car. Rose looked at him. "Slim...I....I...I'm sorry but it is not going to happen that way..."
Slim laughed. "Oh, Rose! I didn't have that in mind! Not that it is an unappetizing idea! I just thought that we could talk here."
Rose said, "I don't deserve such good friends."
Slim said, "Yes, you do. Now--let's talk! Anything you want to. Love, life, relationships, what a scumbag my sister is..."
For the first time that night, Rose gave a genuine laugh and laid her head on Slim's shoulder.
"Oh, Slim! You are the best!" Slim kissed her cheek and said, "You too, kid!"

Just then a flashlight shone in the car. "OK, kids. Let's zip up or whatever and get out of the car and show some ID's."
Rose and Slim looked at each other wordlessly and tried to stifle their giggles.
The laughter stopped when Rose climbed out and looked into the face of Alan Carson.
It was a toss-up on who was more shocked, Rose or Alan.
She stammered, "Alan..."
Alan said quietly, "I don't need to see your ID. And..Slim? Is that you?"
Slim said, "Yeah. Hi, Alan."
Alan stood there taking it all in. Rose. Slim. The renowned lover's lane. He didn't say a word, just turned on his heel and left.

Rose stood there dejected. "I can't believe it. What Alan must think! I didn't even get a chance to tell him how sorry I was about Tori."
Slim thought to himself, this doesn't look good. He said to Rose, "Let's get something to eat at the best place in town!"
Rose protested. "I'm not hungry, Slim. I couldn't begin to eat.."
Slim held the door open. "No arguing. Get in!"

Within a half hour, Rose was sitting at the breakfast bar in Slim's apartment. Slim was flipping omelets in the frying pan. Rose borrowed a pair of sweatpants and a sweatshirt of Slim's.
She sighed. "I always said sweats were a hug from God!"
Slim said, "Warm enough now?"
She nodded. Slim put an omelet in front of her. "You need to have Tabasco with this, Rose. It's not an option!"
They took it in the living room and sat there watching 'Plan Nine From Outer Space.'
Rose groaned. "This is the worst movie ever made!"
Slim said, "Are you kidding? This is a classic in its own right! It takes a back seat to no one!"
By the time the movie had ended, Rose was asleep on the couch. Slim took out an afghan and covered her up. He kissed the top of her head and whispered, "Goodnight, Lady Ro' " and shut the light off.


.....and THE DAWN COMES UP LIKE THUNDER.....Coralynn

Pete is out on early morning traffic patrol, and glances over to where the Montgomery house used to stand up on the rise of ground near the back of the long drive leading into the ranch. He looks and does a double-take. He keeps looking to be sure, he even drives his patrol car down the long driveway to the house to get a closer look.
He parks and approaches the house, at which time he hears shouting inside.
He stands near the back door and hears:
"Get out now, WandaSue! I'm going to buy a rottweiler and a pit bull, and train them to recognize your scent so that if you ever come here again you'll be torn to shreds!"
"HA! You threaten all the time, babydoll, but you won't do that. Besides, the dogs wouldn't even know my scent, get real!"
"Oh no? Oh no? All I'd have to do is let them get a good whiff of the wads of gum you have stuck under that coffee table!"
Hmmmmm, Pete thinks, a domestic disturbance. He phones into the station, getting George on the line. "Where's Alan? Something huge has just happened! The Montgomery house has re-appeared and a man and woman inside are yelling at each other......"
"Can you tell who it is?"
"I heard the name WandaSue, and someone she calls babydoll."
"Hold on, Alan just walked in........" George hears Pete tell Alan the news, at which time Alan comes on the line. "Pete? Get back here, don't do anything yet."
"Right." Pete gets back into his cruiser and returning to the station sees a Channel 7 mobile unit heading out toward the ranch.

Travis is straining to hear Alan's phone conversation, then straining to hear what he's saying to George, but when the TV is turned on, Travis can hear loud and clear:
"This just in on your channel 7 news, the fastest up-to-date channel, the late-breaking news channel, the one more people rely on to bring them the news as it happens, the one more people watch than any other in the tri-state area......Our reporter in the field, Tim Justin has this late breaking story.....over to you, Tim!
"As you can see behind me, the Montgomery house is now back where it has stood for over 100 years. The disappearance of the house for a day and a half may never be solved. Where did it go? How? Why? Stay tuned to Channel 7 for live updates! Back to you......".

Alan walks into his office to phone Jeremy, who's due to arrive at 10. It's just 8am, but this is too important to wait.
Jeremy picks up, "Jeremy Pennypacker here."
"Jeremy, do you have your TV on?"
"I'll turn it on now."
"Never mind. The big news is that the house out at the Montgomery ranch has reappeared. Pete saw it first and alerted me, then channel 7 sent a van out there with cameras and just reported it on TV. My question is......is William Robert Montgomery there?"
"I can hardly hear you," Jeremy tells him.
"I'm keeping my voice low so that Travis can't overhear."
"I'll drive out there now," Jeremy says as he is about to hang up, "I'll take Abby with me."
"Good. I'll phone her right now and tell her she has ten minutes to get ready and to expect you out front in that time."
"Got it!"

Within fifteen minutes Jeremy and Abby are speeding toward the Montgomery ranch, she still drinking coffee and forcing herself to eat a breakfast bar. "Ugh! I hate to eat this early in the day," she comments.
"Me, too. This police work can wreak havoc on your digestive tract! Ahhh, here we are! Yep, that house is back alright."
"What's with this area anyway?" Abby asks, "A house disappears, then re-appears? Is this location so close to Sleepy Hallow that some of the creepiness spills over?"
"I like the theory," he grins at her, "but I have no idea........."
They park and get out of the car, approaching the door just as a very angry woman comes barreling out almost coliding with them, still yelling to someone within the house, "We'll just see about that, oh legally wedded millstone around my neck! Loser! Creep!"
A taxi pulls up and she gets in, slamming the door with great force, then, noticing the two uniformed police officers, grins at them and waggles her fingers in a goodbye gesture.
"Who was that?!" Abby wants to know.
"Let's find out. Whoever is inside, and I'm hoping it's Montgomery, is not on this woman's hit parade!"

Jeremy and Abby ring the bell and wait, and wait and wait.
"He's in there, he has to be," Abby says impatiently.
"Want me to fire a warning shot over the house?" Jeremy kids.
"And make it disappear again? I don't think so...."
The door opens. BB sees the two police officers and tries to sound friendly, "How can I help you, officers?"
"Could we have a word with you, sir?" Jeremy asks politely.
"Sure, why not?" BB opens the door and allows them inside.
They look around. There's a huge waste container standing in the middle of the living room, overflowing with trash. Abby looks at it, then BB.
"Oh that!" he tries to sound flippant, "Had a messy houseguest."
"The woman we just saw leaving?" Jeremy inquires.
"Yes. But I doubt you came to discuss her. What's on your mind?" BB gestures for them to sit.
Abby has to brush potato chip crumbs off the couch, but finds a clean place to sit down.
"Mr. Montgomery, it is our understanding that you were at one time married to Rosamond Clifford, now known as Rose Gwinett, is that true?"
"Yes."
"As you may have heard, we are conducting an investigation into the murder of a Miss Tori Sheffield, who we found had a link to Rosa Gwinett. We won't go into the details, but we need to know if you observed any relationship, good or bad, between the two woman while you were married to Rose."
"I don't think they knew each other then. Rose already had her hands full being on that TV soap opera and cheating on me."
Abby and Jeremy try not to show surprise, "So you didn't have....."
"We didn't have anything! She took my daughter and ran off and married that Gwinett guy."
Jeremy's mind is whirling. How many men are claiming to be the child's father anyway? First Daniel, now Montgomery. Daniel said Rose was not a tramp, but it's not looking good for her right now.
Abby takes over, "So, Mr. Montgomery, you know of no relationship between Rose Gwinett and Tori Sheffield."
"I doubt they even met."
"Thank you for your time, you've been most helpful. If we need to ask you any more questions, will you be here or......Jeremy pauses.
"You mean will my house be here?" BB sounds frustrated, "Hell if I know!"
Abby and Jeremy leave and get into the police cruiser.
"Well, that was no help, but we have to talk to everyone who knows or knew Rose well enough to give us clues regarding her connection to Tori Sheffield." Abby sighs.
"I think the man was right. This 'connection' could have been very recent. It could revolve around the blackmail attempt and nothing more," Jeremy concludes.
"Where to, mon capitain?" Abby quips.
"Back to the coffee shop!" Jeremy quips back, "Alan'll never miss us, and I think you deserve more than a hot cup of Joe spilling down the front of your uniform."
Abby laughs, wipes off the jacket and replies, "Aye, aye Captain!"


HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOT.....by Terri

Eleanor wandered down to breakfast. Celeste was filling the coffee maker.
Eleanor yawned. "Where's Rose?"
Celeste made a "Shhh!" gesture with her finger. Will was sitting there eating his cereal.
"Poppy William volunteered to be a room mother in my class. So he is coming to school and helping us make cupcakes. Everyone wishes they were me!"
Eleanor patted him on the head. "And why is that, little man?"
"Because he is so cool! He's like the Abominable Snowman!"
Celeste tried not to laugh and asked, "How do you figure that, Will?"
Will knitted his brow and said, "Because he's scary looking but when you get up close to him, you realize he is just big and covered with fur and he's not that scary up close. Gotta go!"
He jumped off his chair. "I forgot to tell Daddy something! Be right back!"
Eleanor caught him in mid-run. "Whoa there, Will! Daddy had to go to the gym early this morning."
Will frowned. "But he worked late last night. I didn't get a chance to see him. And Mommy left early this morning, too. Maybe she's at the gym teaching a class."
He got his coat and yelled, "Come on, Poppy William! Get a move on!"
William put on his earmuffs and coat and said, "And away we shall go, Master Will!" After they left, Eleanor asked Celeste, "And where is Rosamond? I mean, where is she REALLY?"
Celeste said, "She stayed at Slim's last night." Eleanor was shocked. "She stayed with Slim?"
"Yes."
"Slim. BESS'S SLIM???"
"Yes. Slim called us last night and said she was with him and she would be allright. He'd take care of her. Then he called this morning and said she fell asleep on his couch. He'll see she gets home alright. She was still sleeping."
Eleanor exploded. "This is going too far! What is with John? So she kept a few poems. Big whoop!"
Bethia came in bearing a basket of blueberry muffins. "Hi, y'all! Thought this would go good with coffee!"
She sat down and looked from El to Celeste. "Did I miss something?"
Eleanor said sarcastically, "No, just that John is making an arse out of himself!"
Bethia reached for the butter. "How do you figure, El?"
" How do I figure? Rosamond didn't come home last night. She spent the night sleeping on Slim Skagg's couch."
Bethia said, "Oh."
Eleanor said, " 'Oh.' Is that all you have to say, Bethie?"
Bethia said, "Well, I guess under the circumstances..."
"What circumstances? A woman has been killed--in his house, I might add--and all John can worry about is a few sexy poems written by his brother?"
Bethia shook her head. "But they were to his wife!" Eleanor said, "Get your head out of the sand, Bethia. Some of the greatest pieces of literature were written to other men's wives. How about the song 'Layla' by Eric Clapton? That's a classic! And he wrote that when he was in love with George Harrison's wife! Now I didn't see Harrison getting his knickers in a twist about that one, did you?"
Bethia said, "I wasn't there, El. And what did you mean by 'get your head out of the sand'? I take exception to that!"
Eleanor said, "I just meant that I know you and John go back a long time. You think John can do no wrong." Bethia said, "And your point, Eleanor Aquitaine, is what?"
Eleanor counted to ten. Then she slowly said, "That girl has had some sort of crap going on every single month since she married John. They've been married since October. Billy Bob resurfaced. She was sent to the Gold Rush. Then to Pompeii. Then on a pirate ship where both of us almost ended up in a harem for Abdul the Camel Trader. Now this! Uh,uh, ladies! I am siding with Rose all the way."
Eleanor put on her coat. Marilyn came downstairs. "Hey, El! Where are you headed off to this early?"
Eleanor grabbed her keys. "I'm going to the fitness center."
"Working out?"
Eleanor said, "No. Just doing leg lifts. When I plant my foot on John Gwinnett's arse!"
And with that, she slammed the back door.

Eleanor peeled into a parking space at the fitness center. She slammed her car door and resolutely walked into the gym.
"Where's John?" she asked Rafe. Rafe pointed to the office door which was shut.
"In there. But I would..."
Eleanor opened the door and slammed it shut.
"...knock first." Rafe lamely finished.
John was sitting at his computer, his face unshaven. "Oh! Hey, Eleanor!" He attempted a smile.
Eleanor said, "Don't you 'hey' me, John Arthur Gwinnett!"
John raised his eyebrow. "Excuse me?"
"No, you're not excused. There IS no excuse!"
John frowned. "Oh. So this is about the wayward wife and the William Wordsworth of Westchester County, is it?"
Eleanor spun John and his chair around to face her. "John, I never thought I would say this to you. Never in a million years. You, sir, are a selfish, narrowminded prig."
"A what? You calling me a pig?"
"No. A prig. You are exacting and self-righteous and unforgiving."
"Don't sugar-coat it, Eleanor. Tell me what is on your mind."
"Alright, I will. Do you know where your wife spent the night?"
"No, I don't. But I do know she was parked down at Venus Point with Slim Skaggs."
"What?"
"Alan Carson was in this morning to work out. He informed me he busted them."
Eleanor said, "Well, there has to be a logical explanation for that."
"Yeah. Right."
John proceeded to skim his cursor over the computer screen.
Eleanor said, "Your poor wife stayed overnight at Slim Skaggs. He took care of her."
"I'll bet. I'd like to know. Is Slim the next Billy Bob Montgomery?"
Eleanor stood there practically speechless. When she found her voice, she said, "I can't believe you said that, John Gwinnett! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU SAID THAT!"

Outside the door, Rafe and Moose were listening.
Moose whispered, "Did you hear what she SAID?"
Rafe nodded. "So THAT'S what his mood was all about last night! Slim...and Rose?"
Moose whispered again, "I thought he was going with that cute little Bess Crane! I mean, is Slim going to lose his job?"

Eleanor continued her tirade. "Have you ever--EVER--considered what Rose has gone through? She had the nerve strain of the blackmail..AGAIN! And now she has a dead woman in her kitchen! Not exactly conducive to cooking gourmet meals, I might add! And what do you do? You walk out on her when she needs you most!"
John said coldly, "I am sure she will have those poems to keep her warm, Eleanor. What business is it of yours, anyhow?"
Eleanor matched his voice in frost. "You are right, John. It is not my business. Not really. But I have a friend who is hurting in the worst way possible."
John said, "A friend who keeps secrets from her husband. Who knows how many other secrets will come out? Today? Tomorrow? Ten years down the road?"
Eleanor said sarcastically, "And you are perfect? You sure didn't mind having an affair with a married woman!"
Moose turned to Rafe and said, "John had an affair with a married woman?"
Rafe shushed him.
John said, "There were extenuating circumstances. She wasn't happily married to him and you of all people knew it!"
Moose tugged at Rafe's sleeve. "Who? Who?" Rafe made quieting motions at him and continued to put his ear next to the office door. "Wow!" he breathed. "It's really hitting the fan now!"

But Eleanor wasn't done shredding John yet. Unfortunately he was holding his own.
"Well, you ought to thank your lucky stars that Slim found her!"
John said, "HA! That shouldn't have been too hard! I'm just surprised she didn't make her way to my brother's place!"
Eleanor stood there speechless.
John was giving it back to Eleanor. "You are a fine one to defend her. She was the reason you were imprisoned. And you gave her the choice of poison or a dagger!"
Eleanor exploded. "That is the biggest crock and you know it! It was just a legend! I'd never do that to my best friend!"
John said, "You don't know what would have happened! If William had left you and Rose there, you could very well have killed her!"
Eleanor yelled, "Don't you turn this around on me, John! I am not here to discuss Rose and myself. I am here to make you realize what a mistake you are making!"
John said, "ME make a mistake? She kept those poems hidden! If she had destroyed them or told me about it, we wouldn't be having this conversation! Tori Sheffield would most likely be alive. She would have had nothing to blackmail Rose with."
Eleanor said, "So what do you intend to do, John Gwinnett? End your marriage? Throw away the best thing that ever happened to you? Because if you do, you will never find another woman that loves you as much as Ro' does."
John said, "What happens is between Rose and me. It is NOT YOUR BUSINESS, Eleanor. Worry about yourself for a change!"
John turned to open a lower file cabinet.
Eleanor drew her foot back and planted it on John's 'arse' like she promised she would. John went flying and sprawled on the floor.
Eleanor said frostily, "It serves you right. JERK!!"

She opened the door and Rafe and Moose fell into the office. Eleanor said, "Your boss seems to have fallen...and he can't get up. Good day, gentlemen!"


THE JUDGMENT...............by Coralynn

Travis McGee stands in front of the Judge, looking nervous as a cat in a room full of rockers.
Judge Quinn looks at Travis intently and says in a loud, decisive voice, "Travis McGee, you will pay for the resurfacing of the driveweay at the house on 224 Winding Willow, pay a fee of one thousand dollars, and wear a tracking device so that Alan Carson knows where you are at all times. You are to stay in your home unless you are doing official police work, that is, something assigned to you by Alan Carson. You are not to do your own investigative work, but check with Alan Carson even if all you do is stop to buy a bagel at the coffee shop. Do you have any questions?"
"What about a social life?"
"That is suspended for the time being. You may, of course, have visitors at your home, but you are not to leave for social purposes."
Alan has been told to bring a tracking device with him. The Judge nods to him, and he attaches it to Travis' right wrist.
"Oooooou, that's too tight!" Travis wiggles his fingers, "You're cutting off my circulation!"
The Judge replies, "You'll get used to it. You are dismissed, case closed," gets up and walks out.

MEANWHILE:

Daisy Moonbeam Freedom runs the tarot cards again...........yes, this says a young man will be influential.......AH! the fellow, the police officer, the one imprisoned unjustly.....that must be the one! I'd better hotfoot it back over to the police station!

She tosses her thick wool poncho in the air and dives for the middle....
Straightening out her garish polyester pantsuit, she leaves her apartment and gets into her 1975 VW bug, which decides to start for a change. She shifts into reverse and it dies.
"Start!" she commands it, "Or I put a hex on you!" then laughs, because the car acts like it already has a hex on it.
She cranks the starter several times and gets the motor running. Shifting into reverse as fast as she can before the car decides it's had enough, she backs out and is soon driving toward the middle of town.
She pulls into the police station parking lot and slaps on her huge flowered hat, thinking, A Lady has to look presentable, after all. A hat makes me look like I do all my shopping at Barneys.
George, at the main desk, sees her enter the station. Oh no, not that one again!
"Hello, police officer. I am Daisy Moonbeam Freedom, renowned psychic, here to see the young man you have unjustly imprisioned for just doing his job. May I please speak with him?"
"Not here, ma'am."
"Pray tell," she puts on her best imitation of a classy voice, "where might he have gone?"
"To talk to the Judge. Oughta be back here any minute."
"Then I'll sit right here till he arrives," she parks herself on a chair and looks through the stack of magazines on the little table nearby. Hmmm, these are all police magazines, how dull. But....just a minute....here's a Playboy. Huh, wonder how this got mixed in with the others.
Both George and Daisy look up as Alan and Travis McGee enter the front door, Travis rubbing his wrist, whining, "But Chief! I promise I won't go against......"
They stop when they see Daisy. She smiles at Travis with her most benign expression. "Hello again, young officer, I am here to give you some good news."
"Swell!" Travis replies, then looks at Alan, who is frowining.
"May we speak in private?" Daisy asks Alan.
Since talking to someone isn't on the list of Travis' prohibited activities, Alan nods yes realizes this is the same wacko woman who was in the day before and groans.
Travis and Daisy retreat to an empty interview/interrogation room. She sits on one side of the table, he on the other. "I know where the body is!" she announces with drama.
"Oh? Which body?"
"That man whose house has disappeared, of course!"
"The house is back, and so is he. Bummer, huh?"
"How about the woman murdered just a night or so ago? I know where her body is buried!"
"Yeah, well, they found her body already. I know, double bummer."
"Well somebody's body has been thrown in a creek! Have any other murder victims whose bodies are still missing?"
"Not that I know of," Travis answers glumly.
"A-HA! I know who murdered her! How about that one?"
Travis leans on the table, his eyes widening, "Now that one I wanna know about! Gotta get myself in good with the Chief again. How do you know who did it, anyway?"
"I, my dear young man, am Daisy Moonbeam Freedom, famous the world over as the psychic to the stars!" she exaggerates.
"Stars? Movie stars?"
"Right."
"Which ones?"
"Well, there's Julia Roberts, Charleze Theron, Naomi Watts, Ashley Judd....."
"I love Ashley Judd!" Travis interrupts, "Could you wangle an introduction? I think she's...."
"Your soulmate. And you're right."
"Wow! Me and Ashley Judd! Soulmates!" Travis' is thrilled.
Daisy is thinking, 'I'd tell him he was soulmates with Rin-Tin-Tin if I had to in order to get someone around here to help me get visible! I need to make the headlines. I need a big score, a big splash! This may just be the guy to help me do that.'


So who murdered Tori Sheffield?" Travis leans over the table even further, keeping his voice barely audible.
"Uhhhh, her name is......"
"What? You said her, so it's a woman?"
"Probably."
"Probably?"
"Either a woman or a transvestite."
"I don't think we have many trans....whatever you said, around here."
Daisy taps his arm gently and nods knowingly, "You're young yet, wait till you've been around as long as I have."
"Will I have to wait that long for you to tell me who the murderer is?" Travis congratulates himself on the joke, but Daisy's face never cracks a smile; instead, she closes her eyes.
He waits and waits for an answer. Finally, upon opening her eyes she says, "The woman's name begins with a letter in the first half of the alphabet."
"But you said you knew who it was!" Travis is getting more and more disappointed.
"Just be patient, young officer. I have to be sure," and she closes her eyes again.
He sits there shaking his foot back and forth impatiently, staring at her, waiting.
"I see a dark haired woman," Daisy finally tells him, "She's dressed well. She has her hair done twice a week. She's married. She swims 20 laps of her pool every morning, winter and summer."
"Winter?"
"Indoor pool," Daisy adds, "Oh yes, she is over six foot tall. Muscular. Has to shave her upper lip every day."
"Maybe this is a transve.....whatever you said."
"Well, young officer, I shall leave now and let you know when I spot this woman and you may then make the arrest. You'll be a hero. Right now I'm running late for a luncheon date I made with an old friend. Ohhhhh, here's my cell phone number. Keep in touch!"
She stands, adjusts her garish polyester pantsuit, and walks out.
"Six feet tall, huh? Hell, she oughta be easy to spot!"





LONG TIME NO SEE.............by Coralynn

Celeste arrives at the coffee shop at 11:59, dressed in her best tweed suit, and scans the booths and tables for Daisy. Would I even recognize her after all these years? she wonders. Thirty five years is a long time. Last time we saw each other we were wearing flared polyester pants and tie-died t-shirts with braided bands around our foreheads. Seems like a million years ago.
"Table for one?" the hostess asks.
"Two. My companion should be here momentarily."
"I'll seat you with a good view of the door," the hostess says as she leads Celeste to a booth near the front. Celeste slides into the side facing the door and waits.
And waits.
And waits some more.
The waitress brings her coffee, which she sips as she continually scans the people coming into the restaurant. No, that group has to be from the Insurance company down the block, none of them are Daisy. Ugh, that woman coming in looks like a refugee from the 60s..........can't be Daisy. Or can it? She has the same wild hair. But what on earth is she wearing? Flowered polyester flared pants? Where does one buy stuff like that nowadays?
She can see Daisy scanning the booths for her, too. Celeste smiles inwardly, I'd better signal to her; she'll never recognize me, especially if she's looking for the Celeste she knew over 35 years ago.
She waves to Daisy, who walks to the booth and stands there staring incredulously, "Celeste!?"
"None other!" Celeste smiles as Daisy slides into her side of the booth.
"My God, woman, I never would have recognized you had you not waved at me. Look at you! You look just like anybody else walking down the street. Sold out to the Establishment, have you?"
Celeste chuckes, "I can see you haven't."
"Never! I am true to the cause!"
"Is there a cause?"
"Yes, surely you must know that the Woodstock generation is still dedicated to changing the world. I'm shocked at you, Celeste, shocked and disappointed."
The waitress then comes over to take their orders, which relieves Celeste of thinking up a rejoinder.
After the waitress leaves, Daisy gets down to businesss, "Celeste, as you know or should know by now, I've moved here and am open for business. I need leads, though. Make out a list of everyone you know, then I can contact them and say you recommended me."
"I'd rather not get involved," Celeste bites into her reuben sandwich.
"Of course not! You were never truly one of us! You had no psychic powers. You just hung around us for the partying. I should have known not to come to you for help."
Celeste refuses to be drawn into an argument, and decides it unwise to inform Daisy that she's involved in things far more advanced than giving 'readings.'

Daisy gets a feverish expression and rattles on, "I met the most remarkable young police officer yesterday. He and I are going to crack the murder case of that woman, you know the one....." ( Celeste nods,) ".......then I'll get my name in the newspaper and people will line up around the block for readings."
"What's the name of this young officer?" Celeste asks as she chomps on a kosher pickle.
"I think it's Travis something or other."
Celeste all but chokes on a piece of the pickle, "Travis McGee?!"
"That sounds right. He was unjustly imprisioned when I met him. Now he's out of jail and he and I have teamed up."
"Oh Daisy, you don't want to have anything to do with that guy! He's major trouble. He dug up our driveway with a jackhammer a few nights ago because he got it into his head we had a body buried under it. He's completely wacko!"
"Our driveway? I thought you said you lived alone."
Celeste decides she doesn't owe Daisy any explanation and goes on, "I feel it my duty to warn you, but......"
"But is right! You, who have sold out to the Establishment! You, who dress like an ordinary upper-middle-class matron. You, who have no psychic powers, You, who won't help out an old friend, You...."
"Now stop it right there!" Celeste's voices rises a few decibels. "I didn't come here to be insulted, Daisy!"
Daisy picks up what's left of her lunch and quickly moves to an unoccupied booth, shooting Celeste an angry look as she does so.
Celeste shrugs, eats the last bite of her sandwich, finishes off her coffee, puts money on the table, and walks out. Once outside the coffee shop, she shakes her head as she gets in her perfectly ordinary car, which has a flowered VW bug parked beside it, drives out, turns right and heads for home.

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