deconstructing mark
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Wednesday 21.4.04 | GOODNESS me, how time flies. My finals start on Tuesday, and here am I, still pratting about wondering where on earth the year has gone. For the first time in my life, I am questioning whether panicking about these exams is the right attitude. Normally, I get nothing done without having a crisis about it, but I've realised that these exams really are quite important, and I'll only work myself into an unproductive stress by panicking - especially as I am more or less ready for the start of the onslaught. I'm worried, but I'm prepared, anyway. And I've just taken a lovely weekend off, spent in Yorkshire too - Saturday night completely hammered at BC's 21st birthday, shouting the word BONKING at an entire restaurant in Leeds (I don't know why I'm allowed out in public when drunk, really not) and then going off on one about funky house (can't be arsed to explain now - another time.) Started drinking again at 9 on Sunday morning despite feeling like I'd been used to wipe Leeds clean, and eventually staggered onto a trans-Pennine train at some point in the afternoon in order to go and see my mum for a couple of days, which was lovely and quiet and relaxing and just generally what I needed. Now sitting here, mentally rolling up my sleeves, preparing for battle. Is going to be a fraught, upsetting, stressful, testing few weeks, but I'll get through it. And look back on it and laugh at how worked up I got over some piddling little exams. Added later: to make matters worse, Adam has just very nearly made me retch and stunk my entire flat out. With his feet. Charming. Thursday 22.4.04 CLEARLY the most effective way of revising yesterday was to go and buy a pair of shoes. Actually, says Mark, furtively looking around in case anyone gets in on the secret, I think they might be fashionable too. Talk about crossing boundaries. Friday 23.4.04 PROCEDURE for this morning if you are Mark: Roughly 8.15: Wake up 8.15 and 12 seconds: Sneeze 92 times A little later, when sneezing-fit has finally come to a brief halt: Curse world, flowers and God for onslaught of hayfever. Spend day alternately loudly blowing nose and sniffing as if degree-result depended on it. Sunday 25.04.04 AH, German grammar, I haven't studied you for such a long time now. Probably accounts for why I'm quite so shit at using you. Ah yes. Giggle. Fuck. Monday 26.4.04 MY German oral exam is tomorrow. My examiners have just changed - in one way, this is deeply problematic because the two I have now are both experts 'my field' of German (sociolinguistics in German, the effects of history on language and vice-versa) so I *really* have to know my stuff, and know how to say it in faultless German. The upside is that we are going to have a lot to talk about, and so I don't need so much to panic about proving flowing, flowery answers to questions about my (lack of) career plans etc. Mmm. | ||
