Here are some jokes about Jewish women. Remember, these are ONLY jokes! I do not have anything against jewish people at all (especially since my grandpa was jewish)....
Harvard School of Medicine did a study of why Jewish women like Chinese food so much. The study revealed that this is due to the fact that WonTon spelled backwards is Not Now.
There's a big controversy on the Jewish view of when life begins. In Jewish tradition, the fetus is not considered viable until after it graduates from medical school.
Q: Why don't Jewish mothers drink:
A: Alcohol interferes with their suffering.
Q: Why do Jewish Mothers make great parole officers?
A: They never let anyone finish a sentence.
Q: What's a Jewish American Princess' favorite position?
A: Facing Bloomingdale's
A man calls his mother in Florida. "Mom, how are you?"
"Not too good,"says the mother. "I've been very weak."
The son says, "Why are you so weak?"
She says, "Because I haven't eaten in 38 days."
The man says, "That's terrible. Why haven't you eaten in 38 days?
The mother answers, "Because I didn't want my mouth to be filled with food if you should call."
A Jewish boy comes home from school and tells his mother he's been given a part in the school play. "Wonderful. What part is it?"
The boy says,"I play the part of the Jewish husband."
The mother scowls and says, "Go back and tell the teacher you want a speaking part."
Q - How many Jewish mothers does it take to change a light bulb?
A - (Sigh) Don't bother, I'll sit in the dark, I don't want to be a nuisance to anybody.
Did you hear about the bum who walked up to the Jewish
mother on the street and said, 'Lady, I haven't eaten in three days.' "Force yourself," she replied.
Q: What's the difference between a Rottweiler and a Jewish Mother?
A: Eventually, the Rottweiler lets go.
A young Jewish man calls his mother and says, "Mom, I'm bringing home a wonderful woman I want to marry. She's a Native American and her name is Shooting Star."
"How nice," says his mother.
"I have an Indian name too," he says. "It's Running Deer" and I want you to call me that from now on."
"How nice," says his mother.
"You should have an Indian name too, Mom," he says.
"I already do," says the mother. "You can call me Sitting Shiva."
Jewish telegram: "Begin worrying. Details to follow.
Back to the Cool Crap Page
To the Cool Crap Page
Back Home