Blonde Jokes

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are on the run from the law when they find an old barn to hide out in. The police are close on their tails, so when the women find three sacks, they immediately jump into them. About a minute later, a policeman comes into the barn and sees the suspicious-looking sacks. He kicks the first one. "Meow," says the redhead. "It must be a cat," thinks the policeman and he kicks the second sack. "Woof," says the brunette. "Must be a dog," thinks the policeman and he kicks the third sack. "Potatoes," says the blonde.

What do you call an eternity?
Four Blondes in four cars at a four way stop.

Three Blondes were driving to Disneyland. After being in the car for four hours they finally saw a sign that said "Disneyland "Left", so they turned around and went home.

What do SMART Blondes and UFO's have in common?
You always hear about them but never see them.

Why did the Blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice?
Because it said concentrate.

Why can't Blondes dial 911?
They can't find the 11 on the phone!

What do you do if a Blonde throws a pin at you?
Run, she's got a grenade in her mouth!

How can you tell if a Blonde has been using your computer?
There is white-out all over the monitor.

How do you drown a Blonde?
Put a scratch & sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool.

Why does it take longer to build a Blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one?
You have to hollow out the head.

Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio? It took her a month to realize she could play it at night.

What happened to the blonde Ice Hockey Team?
They drowned in Spring Training.

What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
Gifted.

How do blonde brain cells die?
Alone.

What do you call it when a blonde dies her hair brown?
Artificial Intelligence.

Why do blondes wear their hair up?
So they can catch as much as they can that is over their heads.

There once was a blonde who lived in a white house. One day, her neighbor was outside, doing yardwork when he noticed her walk to her mailbox, open it up, then slam it shut and walk back into the house.....
10 minutes later, she walks outside again, opens up the mailbox, then feverishly slams it shut again. The man is really puzzled by her actions.....
Another 10 minutes pass, when yet again the blonde comes out to her mailbox, opens it, and slams it shut with a scream!
So, the man walks over to her and ask, "Is there something wrong? Can I help you with anything?"
The woman replied "Well, sir, my computer keeps saying 'You've Got Mail', but there's nothing here!!!!!!"

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