id of the faceless beast
birthdate
okay, time to get kurt vonnegut on you people. take the title of one of stanley kubrick's big hits. the one based on the book by arthur c. clarke, y'know, the first one. if you need help, hum "thus spake zarathustra" to give yourself a clue. now, together, subtract the number of months in a year -and- the number of months in the gestation period of a human infant. add the last digit of the mark of the beast. lastly, subtract the number of legs an arachnid has, and you're done. that's my birthdate.
gender
violent homme.
orientation
eh, whatever.
religion
all alone and of my own, thank you.
eyes
two. and thankfully, life affords me ample opportunity to use them.
ears
see above.
hair
black. was long, but during a moment of personal crisis i said farewell to the whole mess. now it's short. deal with it.
body modifications
four piercings, one self-designed tribal. and other "tamperings".
zodiac sign
aquarius. makes sense, really; submersion is my element.
other zodiacal
i'm not really big on astrology. of course, i've never really bothered to learn that much about it, so if anyone wants to share their wealth of information...
contact information
who i am (further)
i'm the quiet type... you know, the kind of person you probably wouldn't think twice about
if you walked past them. or, you might stare. i don't know, i'm not you. how should i know
what you'd do?
sometimes i'm not sure if i like the 'net or not. as in real life, there are times when i feel like i'm getting
lost in a sea of personal expression. losing track of who -i- am. thoughts of others seep
into my brain, i forget... easily. acquaintances. my friends. their friends. my girlfriend. her friends. even the not-so-great friends. it's simple
to just let it all slide away, and sometimes i have to remind myself to not lose track of my own voice amidst it all. i suppose one can grow on the basis of
what others feel, just be careful not to let them overlap too much with the self. still, the 'net is
both the best (and the worst) use of technology i've ever experienced, in an artifically-distorted sense.
bliss of anonymity...
i used to find beauty in
ugliness...
pain, anger, things like that. i used to believe that i
could craft my -own- aesthetic from what i was drawn to... what seemed to want me. then i
learned that we aren't always drawn to things for a good reason... hurt can build up over
time, and pain doesn't go away on its own. it's a sad feeling to one day suddenly crack open
the depths of ugliness in yourself, and it opened my eyes to the fact that ugliness - while
still dangerously seductive in its own way - can be too corruptive to bear some things to fruition.
i once yearned to, though... i still do (to a degree), but now i know that some things are
simply -ugly-.
i'm tired of hatred. i'm tired of hating. and i'm tired of being hated.
i believe in change. nothing is static, especially life. that which does not change gets left
behind, and that's a thought more frightening than any hell to me. after all, whether you
believe it literally or figuratively, we all evolved from something. the volume of our selves
is only as wide as our growth; that's why i always try to be wary of things like organized
religion... sinking into a dull and routine personal belief is one of the biggest pits a
person can fall into. i try not to accept any one truth for too long, not without questioning
why, and therefore the few truths i have accepted have becoming that much more -real-
to me. the act of questioning and searching for answers (for me) is tantamount to the
end result. and yet, through all that, change remains my one great, hidden fear...
mantra
name
jez ramiel. also known to a small degree on the 'net as
-- flayed/angel --.
email:
-- forevenant@angelfire.com --
icq:
eh, never use it anymore.
aim:
nickname flayedangel, first name jez, last name ramiel, emai- oh, don't be a moron.
phone:
you wish...hehe.
i prefer to think for myself.
i prefer the -penultimate- religion.
i prefer the state of -becoming-, not -being-.
