Sweet Corruption
Title: Sweet Corruption
Part: 20 of 20
Pairing: group slut fic...
Author: Jules
Feedback: I'd love it. Thanks.
Rating: NC 17
Disclaimer: This is a story that I made up all on my own. I do not know or pretend to know any of the Backstreet Boys, their wives, girlfriends or friends. It is fiction, pure and simple.
Back to Reality~Nick~
Opening my eyes I look at the clock over Brian’s shoulder and see that it’s almost noon. I can smell bacon and eggs cooking and coffee brewing and thank god that someone got up to make breakfast. I’m freakin starved here. I roll over to see AJ snuggled in behind me and kiss him softly on the mouth. He stirs at my touch and opens his eyes slowly. "Good morning baby."
"Morning Nicky."
"Get up.. Someone’s cooking breakfast." I stretch out, punching Brian in the process.
"Damn Nick.. Watch where you’re throwing that arm dude." He moans, rolling over.
Grudgingly we all get up and make our way downstairs to see Kevin and Howie sitting at the table, waiting for us to get down there.
~AJ~
I can’t believe that Howie and Kevin made us breakfast. This is too fucking great. I’m so hungry and didn’t want to have to cook.
We all eat, talking about nothing but saying so much. I think it’s understood that things are different now. We’re different. Nick, Bri and I have all agreed that last night was the last of our rendez vous, and from the looks of Kevin and Howie.. They’re in agreement. That’s good. I would hate for one of us to be feeling left out or disappointed that we want out.
Breakfast is done and we’ve put the dishes in the dishwasher, making idle chit chat passing the time. As much as I love them, I want them gone. I want time to myself with Nick. That’s it. I’m kicking them out. I’ve made up my mind and the best way to deal with this is to just be honest.
"Well guys. As fun as things have been... Please get the hell out. I want to spend some quality time with my boyfriend and it’s hard to do with ya’ll here. You guys have homes.. Now go to them. Quickly!"
"Well AJ. Don’t hold back. Tell us how you really feel!" Kevin laughed, getting up off the couch.
"I’m sorry.. But ..."
"Don’t be sorry Bone. I’ve got some stuff I have to do anyways. Thanks for everything, I’ll talk to you guys later." Brian said, putting his coat on and making his way to the door.
"Yeah me too." That was Howie. God I loved these guys. I was kicking them out and they were practically thanking me.
"Thanks for everything guys.. It was amazing." Kevin took turns hugging us all before making his way out the door. And within 10 minutes the house was empty except for Nick and I.
"Damn baby. Had I known that would work so well, I would have done it myself." Nick whispered, wrapping his arms around me tightly.
"All in the delivery babe." I giggled, pulling Nick towards the stairs. "Now lets go. I want to go back to bed and spend all day just lying with you. Cuddling and talking. Is that okay?" It’s true. I just wanted to be near him, feel him and be surrounded by him.
"Nothing has ever sounded better Alex. I love you baby." He pulled back the sheets once we made it to our room and crawled back under them, holding them open for me to get in beside him.
"I love you too Nicky."
~Kevin~
The first thing I did when I left AJ and Nick’s was called Kristin. I had an hour drive from their house to our own, so I explained to her everything that had happened and basically my entire conversation with Howie that morning. She told me she understood completely and was happy that I’d finally realized how much I cared for JC. She was also happy to hear that Howie said that JC was feeling the same way and there was a possibility of my finally finding the one. I knew we needed to sit down and have a serious talk about things, but she said that could wait. I shouldn’t waste any more time than I had already. I needed to call JC and see if we could get together to talk. I’d gotten his number from Howie, knowing that if I didn’t right away, I might never get the courage again. When I got to the house, I phoned him immediately, asking if he’d meet me for coffee in an hour. I wanted to shower and change, get all prettied up for him. He’d agreed and said that he’d be there, wanting to talk to me as well.
I don’t think I've been this fucking nervous in as long as I can remember. I was going to tell him everything I was thinking and feeling. I don’t care if he doesn’t feel as much for me as I feel for him, I just need him to know where I stand. See if he’s interested in at least seeing where we could go. I showered and changed, making my way down to the coffee shop I had told JC to meet me at. I got there with 15 minutes to spare and was grateful that it would give me time to fully relax and prepare myself for what was to happen.
~JC~
I almost fell off my chair when I answered the phone and heard Kevin’s voice on the other end. At first I thought it was this cruel joke that Justin and Joey were playing on me, until I heard Kevin’s nervous giggle and I realized that it really was him. I’d been hoping and praying for almost a month now that Howie would somehow give Kevin my phone number and he’d phone, telling me that our night together meant as much to him as it did me and he wanted to see me again. A real date.
"I need to see you. Can you meet me for coffee?"
"Ummm... Sure. When? Where? Is everything okay?" I didn’t know what to make of Kevin’s call at this point, wondering if I was dreaming.
"How about an hour. Dreams and Beans. Everything’s fine. Even better than fine."
"Okay. I’ll be there Kev. And..... I’m..... I’m glad you called." I hoped I didn’t sound too stupid with that.
"I’m glad too Josh..."
I walked into Dreams and Beans and saw him at a table, sipping a water nervously. I made my way over to the table and had to stop myself from visibly swooning. This man was absolutely beautiful. Breathtaking. "Kev?" My voice was barely a whisper.
"Josh.." He smiled and his whole face lit up. "Sit down." I did and a waitress came over, taking our order quickly.
"So what’s up Kevin?" I was shaking, completely nervous.
"I talked to Howie." My nervousness turned to nausea.
"Wha... What?"
"JC. I had no idea that that night meant... That you... God. I don’t know what to say." He was blushing and I could feel my stomach churning. I could tell that Howie had told him how I feel about him, but I didn’t know why he wanted to see me. Unless.... Unless he felt the same way.
"Yes Kevin?"
"Oh God JC... I want so much to go back and react differently the morning after. Go back and tell you that that night had been the single most amazing night of my life. That you made me feel things that no one else has ever made me feel, and tell you that one night just wasn’t enough."
My breath was caught in my throat and I was seriously wondering if I was hallucinating. Kevin was sitting her telling me that he... That he felt how I felt about it.
"Are you saying... What are you saying?" My hands were shaking and he noticed this, taking them into his own hands.
"Josh ... What I'm saying is that I want to see you again. I felt something that night and I can’t ignore it. I can’t run from it and if you’d want.. I would like to see where we could go."
Oh god. It think I'm going to cry. Or throw up. Or both. But amazingly, I do neither. "You do? With me?" I can’t believe this. I can’t let myself believe this.
"Yes Josh. With you. You are so amazing, and beautiful and talented. Please... I’m sorry that I pulled away that morning. I’m sorry that I’ve practically ignored you, not doing anything to let you know how I was feeling..."
"Stop." I had to stop him. I was as much at fault as he was because I’d done the same thing. "Shhh... Kev. I understand. I felt the same way.. Did the same thing. But yes. I’d love to see you again. See where we can take this and possibly start a relationship... If that’s what you want."
He didn’t answer me, but just looked at me with a smile on his lips. Slowly, he leaned in and kissed me softly. I was surprised, mainly because we were in a crowded coffee shop, but as soon as I felt his tongue on my lips, pressing gently, everyone else in the room disappeared.
"That’s exactly what I want Josh."
Thank you Howie.
~Brian~
I’d spent the entire ride from Nick and AJ’s to my house rehearsing what I was going to say. I wanted it to be perfect and not fuck this up. But I know what’s going to happen. I’m going to get in there, see her and forget everything I plan on saying. I’ll see how beautiful she is, how much I love her and I’ll get scared. But I need to do this. For us.
I pull into the driveway and can’t help but just sit there for a few minutes, clearing my head and calming my nerves. I’ve stopped along the way and gotten some lunch. I think I just stopped to prolong having this conversation. I just ate at the house, and am anything but hungry. I guess it’s time I suck it up and deal with it. Go in the house and face the music. Oh fuck.. Now I'm thinking in clichés. When I walk through the door I see Leighanne curled up on the couch with the dogs. She’s in her flannel pajamas and is more beautiful than I’ve ever seen her. The dogs notice me first and start yipping, jumping down to greet me.
"Hey babies.. How are my babies?" I look up from where the dogs are licking me and jumping on me to see her smile. She looks a little nervous, hesitant and I wonder if she knows. If something’s wrong. "Hey babe... Did you miss me?"
"I always do sweetie." I walk over and sit down on the couch beside her, pulling her in for a long kiss. I feel her grab onto me tightly, holding me close and I take a deep breath. This is it. I HAVE to do this.
"Baby... Can we talk?"
Her head snaps up from my chest and her eyes are huge, fearful almost. "Pardon?"
"I think we need to talk. Let’s go upstairs. I’m tired and we can talk in our bedroom.
There's confusion on her face and her uneasiness is making me uneasy. Oh god I hope she doesn’t freak out on me.
"Is everything okay Bri? Did something happen?"
"Sorta Leigh. Come with me and we can talk about it upstairs." I pull her off the couch and we walk up to our bedroom in silence.
~Leighanne~
Oh my god. He’s leaving me. He’s going to leave me for Nick. Or AJ. Or both of them. I don’t know how I'm going to handle this... He’s my life. My love and I can’t imagine not having him in my life. Something happened last night and now he wants to talk. He’s going to tell me it’s over and he’s in love with someone else. I can tell it in his eyes. There’s something he wants to tell me but is afraid of how I’m going to react. I can read him like a book, and as cool and calm as he thinks he’s being, I know there’s something wrong.
I wrack my brain to try and think about what I’ve done to upset him, to make him want to leave me and I can’t think of anything. Oh god. I need to calm down. Listen to him with open ears so we can deal with this rationally. I love him so much. I wanted to have a family with him, spend my life growing old with him and now he’s going to leave me.
My mind is racing a mile a minute and I barely even register him talking to me. "Leighanne, I think we should sit down. I think you should sit down."
He’s talking to me like I don’t understand him, like he’s trying to soften the blow and he’s not about to rip my heart out and make a smoothie out of it.
"Why do I need to sit down Bri? What’s wrong? Why do you look so serious?" In my attempt to keep my voice steady, I forgot to try not to tremble, a sure sign of my nervousness. Of course I’m fucking nervous. My husband who I love more than life itself is about to leave me for someone else. Anyone else.
"Nothing’s wrong baby. I just... I need to talk to you ...and it is serious. At least I think it is."
"What is it? You can tell me. We can work this out... Please don’t leave me Bri. I couldn’t bear it if you left." I was babbling now and I don’t even think he was listening.
"I want to have a baby Leigh. I want us to start a family." He said that at the same time I begged him not to leave.
"Leave you? What do you mean? Where am I going?"
"A baby? You want to have a family?" We both spoke at the same time, looking at each other incredulously.
"Shhhhh. Leigh... Stop for a second. What did you say?" He sat down beside me and took my face in his hands.
"I don’t want you to leave me baby. I love you so much and I know that you love Nick and Alex too.. But I need you." I’d started crying and was shaking uncontrollably now.
"I’m not going anywhere sweetie. Oh god.. You thought I was leaving you? I’m so sorry... I’m so sorry..." He began to rock me and I slumped against him, thankful that he wasn’t leaving. That he still loved me and wanted to be with me. "Oh baby... I love you so much. I’m never going to go anywhere. It’s you and me until Heaven baby. Shhhhhhh... Stop crying. It’s okay."
My tears of panic turned into those of relief. "I wanted to talk to you about starting a family. I want us to get pregnant. I want to have beautiful babies with you. I know we said we didn’t want that right now... But I changed my mind. I want that. Whenever you’re ready of course.. But I'm ready now."
When he said that I pulled away from him, staring at him through watery eyes. "You do?"
"I do baby. More than you know."
I couldn’t answer him. He looked so beautiful, his eyes so full of hope, just waiting for me to crush that dream.
"Thank you. I was afraid to ask. I know that the group is so important to you and... I want to have babies.. Lots of them."
Now we were both crying, and he wrapped his arms around me tightly, letting us fall back onto the bed.
"Thank you, thank you, thank you..." I don’t know if that was me or him, but we were both kissing and mumbling to each other, completely tangled in one another.
"When do you want to start Bri?" I asked, knowing that this was going to take planning and maybe a trip to the doctor.
"He laughed and pulled away from me slightly. "I don’t know.. But just not today. I’m so tired... I don’t think I could do much of anything with it right now anyways."
Laughing I kissed him passionately, snuggling close to him. "Just me and you babe. Just me and you now."
~Chris~
How could I be so stupid? How the fuck could I just let him go there and not tell him how I was feeling. "Sure.. Go... Explore your feelings." I told him. "I don’t mind." Well I fucking lied. I do mind. What I should have told him was how fucking scared that he’d see that he was just using me to fill in for the man who he’s always wanted but never had. Kevin fucking Richardson. How the hell could I compete with that? You have on one side of the scale, a 6 foot Greek god looking guy who even I’d fucking submit to, and on the other scale there’s me. 5 foot me who’s definitely seen better days. Not that I’m any less a man than Kevin, but in Howie’s eyes I just don’t know. I just can’t believe I let him go there without telling him how I felt. How much I love him and hope that he finds what he needs. And what he needs is me.
Apparently they’ve all left Nick and AJ’s because Kevin called Josh and told him he wanted to see him. Wanted to talk to him. I think that Josh almost pissed his pants and I really hope that things work out for them. From what Howie’s told me, Kevin seems like he could be as interested in Josh as Josh is in him. Of course Kevin’s never said anything... He doesn’t know that Howie knows, but whenever they hear our music, see us anywhere, Kevin gets this look on his face and Howie knows it’s something special.
FUCK!!! Where is he? I thought he would come here and see me afterwards. Let me know how things went. I guess this means that it’s over. He’s seen what life on the Backstreet side of the fence looks like and he’s not interested in...
I hear the doorbell ring and feel my blood run cold. Oh shit. I wonder if that’s him. Who else would it be? Well I won’t know if I don’t fucking answer the door. Damn.. I really have to stop talking to myself. That could be a problem. I open the door to see Howie standing in front of me, his short curly hair perfect, cocoaish skin glowing, and a big smile on his face.
"Chris." He says softly, not making a move to come in.
"Howie." It’s a breathy, nervous sound and I mentally kick myself for being such a pussy. I’m such a fucking girl when it comes to Howie that it’s not funny. It’s a big joke with us. We are always wondering which one of us is the girl in our ‘relationship’. I say it’s me and he says it’s him. We both spend more time than necessary primping ourselves. We’re both too clothes conscious than we’d like to admit. And we’re both just so girlie sometimes. But it suits us. We understand each other. And I’m standing here gushing to myself about him when he’s looking at me with that fucking smirk on his face.
"Wanna..."
"Come in? Yeah."
~Howie~
Oh god. He’s so beautiful. He opened the door and I felt my breath catch. While he was looking me over, I did the same to him. It always amazes me how much of a reaction he can get out of me, just by standing there. Watching me with a slight look of fear in his eyes. I know he’s scared about last night. He told me to go, said that it didn’t bother him, but I know it did. He was scared that I would see what a mistake we are and realize that I want to keep things a little closer to home. That I would end things with him, and break his heart. He doesn’t realize that even though he’s given me his heart, he’s had mine this entire time as well. I think it’s time that I finally let him in on that secret.
"Come sit with me Chris." I pat the couch beside me and he joins me, smiling at me.
"So? How did it go?" He’s playing with the hem of his tee shirt and won’t look at me.
"I love you." I could have made him wait, dragged on telling him in excruciating detail what happened and what it all meant and how it made me realize how I really feel. I could have done that. But I didn’t want to. He deserved more than that. I’d made him wait long enough already.
His head jerks up and he’s got a half smile on his face, like he’s waiting for the punch line. "Huh?"
"I love you Christopher. God how I love you. Last night made me realize that. That I’d been so afraid to admit to myself what I'd known all along. That I love you."
His eyes had teared over and he bit his lip softly.. "Do you... Do you mean it? Really?"
"I mean it. I love you." I leaned in and kissed him softly, caressing his cheek with my left hand, while running the other one through his short spikes down to his neck. "It just took a little corruption in my life to make me see what I had right in front of me."
I broke the kiss and stood up, pulling Chris to his feet as well. "Let’s go to bed babe." I know it’s still mid afternoon, but it had been a long weekend and I wanted to be in the one place I felt most safe and comfortable, Chris’ arms. I silently thanked my 4 angels who unknowingly brought me the happiness I’d thought was beyond me. Corruption truly was sweet.
Finis