Title: Maybe, Just Maybe
Series: Our Wicked Ways
Author: Aceetha/Dawn
E-Mail: shyspyke@toowicked.com
Disclaimer: This is pure fiction. Nothing in this story happened. I don't know the BSB's. If I did I wouldn't be sitting here writing this alright.
He looks so peaceful when he sleeps. His blonde hair is all messed up, and I fight the urge to run my hands through it, to trace the lines of his face, to lean down and kiss him. I have to fight the urge to touch him at all. Cause I don't wanna spoil the moment.I could lie awake and stare at him sleeping forever. He looks so peaceful, so content. A smile flash accross his face, and he stirrs, but he's still asleep.
I've been awake for about an hour or so, thinking a bit, and staring at him alot. I can't believe he's really mine. Of all the girls, and guys he could have, he chose me. That makes me a very lucky man.
A very confused lucky man. I love Nick, I know that. I never wanna give him up, I know that too. But I'm engaged, and I don't think I can break it off with Leighanne. That would mean I'd have to explain, and what the hell am I supposed to tell her? "I'm sorry love, but I'm in love with Nick now. We've been fucking each other behind your back. I don't love you, I can't live with you, hey, I have to think of Nick just to kiss you."
Hm, I could say that, if I wanna be looked upon as a total jerk.
Although I am having an affair, with a man no less. Maybe I am a jerk. Well, I can live with that as long I get to do Nick.
I can live with anything as long as I have him. But that doesn't mean I'm in a hurry to tell the world. That wouldn't be fair, not to the other guys. As of now, no one knows, and if we wanna be happy, that's the way it has to stay.
It still doesn't slove the Leighanne problem. I mean, I'll be marrying her in what, one week. Too late to call it off now. Me and Nick, we've talked about it. He knows I have to fuck her on the honeymoon, and though he says it's alright, I know it's not. He's dealing with it because he has to, not because he wants to. There's a difference there.
It's been great, these last few months. Even with her on the road, we've had a lot of time to ourself. No one suspects a thing, I think. I'm not quite sure when it comes to Kev. When we were at Bahamas, he kept wanting to know where we went, like all the time. OK, so he's Kev, the big bro of the group, but he's never been like that before. But then again, if he knew, he'd confront us. That's just the kind of thing he does.
Leighanne doesn't seem to worry that I spend time with Nick. She even understands when I spend the nights there. I keep telling her I wanna wait, make the honeymoon special. She thinks I sleep at Nick's so I won't get tempted. She keeps telling me she can't wait, that it's gonna feel so good to make love to me again.
I tell her I feel the same. A lie, of course, because I don't. For me it won't be making love, for me it will just be sex, something I am obligated to do.
My thoughs will not be on her, but on Nick. I have to think of Nick to be able to perform, nothing else turns me on anymore.
I'm obsessed, I know.
I chose my brother as a best man back when I got engaged, but now he can't make it. I was sorry to hear it, he appologised so much, but I felt good as well. Now Nick is my best man. Nick is my man. And maybe, just maybe, some day we'll be able to walk down the street hand in hand, without the press making a big deal out of it.
Seriously, I don't think that's ever gonna happen.
*****
He's staring at me, thinking I guess. He thinks that I'm asleep, and I'm ok with that. It gives me time to think some things through.
We've had some great last months, the two of us. He's pretty much living in my room now, giving Leighanne the 'I don't wanna have sex before we're married' crap. She bought it though, as did the others. So now I get to fuck Brian every night.
I love my life.
The trip to the Bahamas was great. No Leighanne, no media, just us five guys. I didn't get to share with Bri, but he still stayed more in my room than his own.
Kevin got on my nerves though. He was close to finding out on more than one occasion.
//Backflash//
I look down on Brian, grinnig at him. His eyes are shining in the sunlight, and the beach is deserted. Which is why I can lie on top of him, my hands trailing his jawline.
"You know I love you right?"
He looks at me and smiles.
"I do"
I lean down to kiss him, and our tongues join in a battle, first in my mouth, then in his.
His eyes are closed, no surprise there, and his face seems to peaceful. I pull away, looking at him, my eyes filled with passion and my cock starting to respond.
I lean down, about to kiss him again.
"Yo, Nick, Brian, what'cha doin down there?"
It's Kevin, I look up towards the sound and grin at him.
"Wresling" I say. He shakes his head, running his hand through his hair.
"Well, stop fooling around and come back to the rest of us. We're here to write songs, not wresle."
I nod to him. Can't do anything else.
"On our way"
//End Backflash//
We were lucky then, and we learned a lesson. Next time, make sure you DON'T tell Kev where you are going if you are planning to kiss each other.
"I'm sorry love, but I'm in love with Nick now. We've been fucking each other behind your back. I don't love you, I can't live with you, hey, I have to think of Nick just to kiss you."
I open my eyes just a bit, I don't think he even realized he spoke out loud. He's looking at me, but doesn't notice that I open my eyes.
He's thinking about what to say to Leighanne.
I've been doing that alot lately, thinking about what to tell Leighanne, to make her leave Brian. But I can't think of a single thing. I know he can't just leave her, that would bring up too many questions. But I don't like the fact that in less than a week, Brian will have to fuck her, again.
He says he thinks of me, and I believe him, but that doesn't mean I have to like it.
The wedding.
Just one more week.
I'm the best man now. I wasn't his first choice, but then again, I wasn't expecting to be it either.
I'll be the best that I can, and hope everything goes well.
"You awake?"
I look up at him.
"Yeah Love" I say, leaning forward to kiss him.
"Been awake long?"
"A while. Looking at you. You were thinking?" I smile at him.
"Yeah, about..."
"Leighanne. Me too"
I love to finish what he says for him, and he loves it when I do it.
"Time to get up?"
"Yeah. I'm in need of a shower. You?"
I raise my eyebrows, and he grins at me.
This is gonna be fun.