While reading, keep in mind that this page is for fans who want to make a little fun of their favorite band. If this does not describe you, don't read!
Ever wonder what the guys of O-town would have as their voicemail? You know everyone wants something unique, something their friends can call and even if they don't talk, they'll know for sure that they didn't reach the wrong number. Well, here's a little peek at what they might be for our favorite group!
Trevor
Dan
Ashley
Jacob
Erik-Michael
Mike Cronin
Top Ten Things O-Town must have on the Road
10. Trevor must have the Justin Timberlake poster form the bathroom of the old house
O-town's Ten Favorite Sayings
1. Too Little too late baby! The Trevor train done passed you by!
2. Wooo! How good did that feel?
3. Dan is irresponsible Dan is mean!
4. I hate you-courtesy of everyone's fav! Shelli!
5. Shut the F*** up! I am not mean!
6. I'm iffy about being here. I don't want to be here all the time
7. If Ikaika's in the group..I quit!
8. You are not a star..you are a lab rat.
9. You're getting a little 80's on me...a little Wham
10. Erik...EEERRIIKKK.....
O-town's favorite pick-up lines
Hey baby! Wanna ride the Trevor train?-Trev
Wanna take a shower with me? They'll film it on camera-Ashley
You make me wanna be irresponsible-Dan
My Ralph Lauren sheets are really comfy, want me to show you?-Erik
Hey my bedroom is painted like the ocean. Let me take you under the sea sweet thang-Jake
First Night Out
Trevor
(an odd tension fills the room when out of nowhere, the apparently brainwashed Jacob & Ikaika get up and hug)
An hour later, after picking up a Monopoly game at Target:
Trevor
1 Hour Later, Finally Playing -Erik rolls a four, and lands on boardwalk with a hotel-
Jacob
-Ikaika rolls a two and lands on Chance-
Ikaika
Erik, Jacob, Trevor, Ikaika
1 Hour Later, Guys meet Security Mark at the Staples Center in L.A.
Mark
-Guys walk in and find Lou raiding the fridge and cramming his face, they all look on amazed-
Erik
-Dan walks in-
Dan
Otown: Making The Video
( The guys are making a new video for their new single Love Should Be a Crime and Erik has come up with an idea for the video.)
Erik
Trevor
Erik
Ashley
Jacob
Dan
Jacob
Ash
(All the guys roll their eyes)
Trev
Jake
Ash
Erik
Dan
(Jacob laughs)
Trev
Erik
Jacob
Erik
Jacob
Ashley
Dan
Trev
Erik
Trev
Dan
Ashley
Trev
Dan
(Jake smacks Dan again)
Ash
Dan
Jacob
Dan
Trev
Dan
Erik
Ash
Trev
Jacob
Ashley
Jacob
Trev
Erik
Dan
Trev
Erik
(Adam Miller and Bryan Underwood walk into the room after shopping all day to find the guys argueing and acting retarded)
Bryan
Ashley
Jacob
All "Humor" is fully credited to Mandy, Humor Editor of Got O-Town?.
(Backstreet boys The Call in the background)
Hey I can't talk right now! This is the most exciting day of my life! I'm meeting AJ! Hey if you leave a message I'll call and tell ya all about it!
(call fades out to hear AJ's part of The Call in the beginning)
(some random Stevie Wonder song in the background)
Hey this is Dan. I'm kind of busy being not only the only responsible one in the group but also the only clean one so I can't come to the phone. Leave a message and once they all go to bed and I can stop being their den mother I'll call ya back.
(starts out with Michael Jackson's Thriller before Ashley speaks)
Hey this is Ashley's phone. I can't talk right now because I'm in the shower being taped by the freaking cameras again. Who said these guys could do that anyway?
Oh well, after I get done playing superman I'll call back if you leave a message.
Oh and no whining, you know who you are.
(You can here the lyrics "Cut my life into pieces, this is my last resort" from Papa Roach before Jacob begins his message)
This is Jake. Between dreading my hair and doing side projects of music I actually like there's not much time to answer the phone. But if you leave a message and assuming that Lou hasn't cut our phones off again, I'll try to call you back and tell you how much I hate Pop music later.Bye
Hey this is Erik and no, not the one from CHIPS, and by the way that's not funny anymore. Mike and Mike are probably running us ragged at the moment or Jacob is screaming at Andrew, or maybe we're even out performing. So leave a message and I'll call you back except for if this is my dad, in which case I'll call in about 20 years when you get famous.
Hey this is Mike Cronin, yes I am Rich's brother, no I cannot get you tickets to LFO.
I'm busy with the guys right now, running around in circles chanting "Dan is irresponsible, Dan is Mean" but when I resume being a mature manger again I'll call you back.
Oh yeah, leave a message.
9. Ashley must have atleast one peice of Superman memorabilia just to make him feel like home
8. Jacob won't leave without his entire Michael Jackson video collection to properly study the moves
7. Erik can't leave without his Viagra jacket
6. Dan has to have that humungous orange sweater vest that he wore at the auditions and on his first day there to remind him of the good times.
5. All the guys requested a dart board with a picture of Lou "Big Papa" Pearlman for when they get bored.
4. Ashley must have a weekly dose of Shelli (as requested by the other 4) to hopefully show him what a whiney ass she can be.
3. Mike Cronin must have pictures of Steve Fatone and Aaron Carter to show him that no matter what people might say, he does not ride his brother's fame as bad as some people do.
2. Don't even try to take away Jake's 4 days off or all hell will break loose
1. The band...after Miss America, I wouldn't mess around with recorded shit either.
(must push girl at this point)
(must yell this one)
(you know the drill get in a circle and chant)
(please be as whiney as possible with this one)
(yell and walk out of room...do it for no reason and it's even funnier)
(this one must be repeated so much people think you're a broken record)
(any group Ikaika's in I quit)
(pretend to be a giant asshole road manager here, if you can get someone to stage dive first that will add to the overall effect)
(shake head and wear 80's clothing giving you no real room to talk about that)
(stand outside door and chat this whenever trying to wake someone up)
Wow, our first night on the road together, what do you guys wanna do?
Ashley
Hey, I heard *N Sync plays Monopoly on the road
Ikaika
Cool, Monopoly is the best
Jacob
We don't have a board, you idiots
Ikaika
Hey, do you wanna go? I'll go wit you. We can settle things like I settle things.
Jacob
Pppp. Ha Ha Ha, your losin' it again man
I still think we should have got Who Want's To Be A Millionaire, I know what a bakers dozen is
Ashley
I heard Justin eats the little houses
Jacob
Yeah, but none of us are that hungry
Erik
Maybe if we go find Lou
Trevor
I don't want Lou in here, he'll break the bus, you saw what he did to the recliner
Erik
Remember my "Big Poppa" rule, let me eat all your food and break your furniture by plopping my big fat ass onto it
Jacob
Erik, your such an ass, but it is true
Ikaika
I'm so psyced, how many people are gonna be there?
Erik
About 2,000, but we'll probably have to divide that by five
Ha Erik, you owe me two grand
Erik
How do you figure? It isn't that much
Jacob
Inflation
Erik
Whatever Lou
Man, i broke my leg, but i get $100
Ashley
I heard that statistically, Hawaiians break more bones because of surfing accidents
SHUT UP ASHLEY!
Let me take you guys to your dressing room
Jacob
All-4-U, It's-About-Damn Time
So he's hungry, big shock.
Hey Ikaika, why don't you go back to Hawaii
Love Should Be A Crime
Guys! Guys! No Hush! Listen, I was thinkin we could do it like this big jail house thing. Ya know we could have all these girls and hand cuffs!
Um...Erik no offence but lets leave your wet dreams out of this thanks.
But the guys would love it and we need a bigger male fan base
But if we do that then we will have bigger issues cause we will lose our female fan base.
I don't care what the hell we do but if one person tells me to look sexy....
Chill Jake or I'm tellin them you wanna be in the video with a puppy
(smacks Dan)
Who asked you to talk? I don't remember telling you to talk
Shelli would never let me do that anyway
Um...haven't we lost her yet? I thought we left her back in Cali finally
I wish we could leave her somewhere she's drivin me nuts
Don't be mean. She pursuing her dream!
Yeah she's pursuing you. Lord Ash she's gonna stalk you for the rest of your life!
Ashley has a stalker! Ashley has a stalker!
Listen guys we're getting off track on this one. We need an idea
Hey what about mine?
Erik um, MTV tends to have a zero bandage rule. I don't know that it would be great to have our video banned
(pouting)
Then what do you want to do?
We could do this crazy rocked out Vegas style video with guitars and Trev, you could play drums, and.....
Jacob? Need we remind you that we are in a BOYBAND?
Shhh....Ash don't use that word. He'll freak out and go ballistic
I don't know how to play the drums
I'm still with my idea
Of course you are. I think we should do one with all of us in our own seperate rooms and we could have it all be in like this same building and I could be in this really cool room with like fur and shit
Oh yeah let me call the Backstreet Boys and see if it's alright with them if we jack their video...AJ junior
Come on guys we gotta think of something!
Fine then Ashley what do you want to do?
Don't even ask him! He probably wants to do a song called "Oh My Shelli!"
Why don't we just do a remix of " Dan is irresponsible Dan is mean" and release that one?
Oh that's funny...let me laugh real quick...asshole!
Then what do you want to do Dan?
Well we could all get big sweater vests...and we could film in Ohio....
That's it. You are cut off from ideas!
Why is everybody so mean to me?
Because you are not Erik Estrada
Yeah but atleast he doesn't hang up on reporters! That lady has never talked to us since. Thank you very much!
Oh yeah Ashley and I'm sure everybody wants to see you wear that stupid ass grey shirt over and over and over again. When do you have time to wash that?
He doesn't. He's dirty boy
What are you talking about Jake? When was the last time you washed your nappy ass hair?
They're dreads man! Step off!
I gotta agree with Ashley on that! I don't even want to be seen with you like that
Oh yeah and we want to be seen with you and those corn rows? I don't think so. And if you even make another BSB reference in public again, I will personally smack you.
And the red pants? What were you thinkin man?
Room to talk Ohio! What the hell is with your sweaters? And the damn Cleveland Indians everything?
Oh and not to mention the way you wear those bandanas? Are you retarded?
What is the problem here?
Your brother is dirty
So is Ashley!
