Sun 15 Feb - Day 375
Tonight as I concentrate on standing and stepping round into bed Maggs asks if I want a drink. I ask for tea and get a cup placed on the table at the bottom of the bed. Impossible to reach.

10pm: The staff nurse asks for me to be made tea in a beaker. I hear Maggs refuse to bring it in.

Sat 14 Feb - Day 374
My ability to hold anything is impaired. I tend to drop things. So when offered a cup of tea in bed the staff put it in a beaker. It's embarrassing but neither of us want me to get burnt...

On 20 Jan Maggs asks if I want tea. I am surprised to hear her rattle china so I ask for a beaker. Hand on hip 'Why in a beaker?' She waits until I answer. 'Because I don't want to burn myself.' I get beaker.

Tonight again rattle of china. So I ask for beaker. I get cup.

Wed 11 Feb - Day 371
Martin has been offered a flat to move into which he is due to view with the social worker here today. He was offered it three weeks ago but there was no one free to view it with him.

Then at lunch he is informed that the landlord will be taking a deposit from someone else this afternoon - he's lost the property. He takes it well but after lunch leaves the unit.

After five hours he has not returned. The ward manager must go off duty soon but leaves her mobile number if the staff need her. She also contacts main hospital reception so they can ring up to the unit as soon as he arrives back on the grounds to forwarn. The unit is braced.

I wonder whether its best to seek refuge off the ward in the computer room, but thereagain that was the scene of our last encounter...instead I arm myself with body spray and a comb.

Martin returns at 9pm. He is sober, balanced, joking with the staff but saddened by the loss of his flat. He used the hours of his absence to find the best resturant in town and have the best meal he could afford.

Mon 9 Feb - Day 369
Martin, who is already on a yellow card, is given a red card today which equals eviction.

Sun 8 Feb - Day 368
A patient and his wife return from weekend leave accompanied by their 5 year old son. As they return to the unit they find Martin drunk and feuding with patient Fred because he will not return money owed for cigarettes. The couple are very upset that their son has witnessed this...'We do not use language like that in our house and if my son uses it in play school I'm the one that will be blamed.'

Both husband and wife make a statement.

Sat 7 Feb - Day 367
1pm - Patients rest time: I ask if the TV temporarily in our bay can be turned down so I can sleep. Nurse: 'Can't you put a pillow over your head? Don't you have earphones?'

I ask a few minutes later and another nurse turns the TV down and the lights off.

6pm - I ask for the TV to be switched off earlrier tonight seeing as it was left on all afternoon. Sister: 'Well you slept all afternoon. You won't need to sleep tonight.'

Fri 6 Feb - Day 366
After five days of monitoring the situation Rebecca is very swiftly discharged. The consultant came to notify her of the decision to discharge her at 3pm and by 5pm a taxi had been paid for to take her home.

Thurs 5 Feb - Day 365
I stand and begin to walk again in the parallel bars.

Wed 4 Feb - Day 364
Mick has been given a date for the operation to rebuild his leg - 26 Feb.

Tues 3 Feb - Day 363
I make a complaint to staff nurse Fiona because she sanctioned the use of my home shopping catelogues in my absence. This happened to be at the same as I had a meeting with my social worker who had driven 20 miles to discuss buying housewares from the catelogues.

Fiona did apologuise followed by giving me a round up of what it was like to work on the unit including information on the treatment and/or outcome of three current patients....'Not that I'm giving you confidential information...'


Staff nurse Marlon could not be found anywhere midmorning. Then Anna was found to be missing as well. All remaining staff assumed they would be discovered together.