i need a vacation
Mood:  not sure
oh good goddess this is horrible. i can't beleive that i might actually be pregnant again. that is quite possibly the worst thing that could happen right now. that is all i need in my life is a baby. i have enough trouble trying to take care of myself. amanda is not helping either. i am actually ready to kill her. if she could keep her big mouth shut it would be okay but no apparently that is too much to ask. i wanted to hit her when she just yelled it out throughout the building.
her little comments about how she just knows really didn't make me all that happy either. i was to a point where i wanted to slug her again. she just doesn't know when to quit. maybe that is why she is losing friends fast. they all are really getting sick of her attitude. huh that might be something that someone should tell her...nah let her figure out on her own.
i am going to talk to Dom tonight. i am going to tell him that i can't do this anymore. i can't play whatever the hell it is that we are. i have a couple guys that would love to date me and make my dreams come true but deep down i don't want them. i want hima and he knows it. i have to tell him that i messed around with Ben and i am not looking forward to that either. i am not sure how he is going to react to the whole thing.
can you imagine what his reaction is going to be if i am pregnant? he will hyper-tweak oh hell i hope that i'm not yet at the same time there is a little part of me that is hoping that i am. is that horrible. i know that right now the last thing that woudld work in my life is a baby but i can't help thinking it is the back of my mind. it would be aawesome to have a little baby boy that is all my own. i know that if i am it is going to be a boy. i can tell.