Second part in the Five Gold Rings series:

Part 1     Part 3    Part 4     Part 5

New Years Resolutions

by
Rngrdead

Part Six

Turning Point


Still caught in his own thoughts regards the poem and love lost, Spike suddenly realized the implications of being identified by the person he was facing, and reeled back as if scorched. He knew that he had no explanation for his return to this plane! Let alone the idea that he had not contacted ‘loved ones’? It smacked of Angelus’ denial of his childe William post soul. And yet….

Already emotional from the powerful and painful memories the poem had evoked, it was all Spike could do to cough in a vague indication of disbelief as the single deep brown eye and patch of leather met his gaze barely three feet away.

In a self protective and quite instinctive response, Spike, with tears still streaming down his
cheeks (fault of his beloved Byron!), wrapped his arms around himself in a vain attempt to shield his inner core from the outside world and prevent the predictable ‘meltdown’. He slung his left arm around his torso, and grabbed his own hair with the other hand, masking his face to all but the man that had elicited the reaction. Barely containing the urgent need to run from the moment, it was all he could do to struggle out a strangled “Ohhh Hell, Yeah, S’me ”.

Xander on the other hand, had only been vaguely aware of the words woven into the rather moving (and as it turned out, personally touching) poetry. Instead Xander focused on the azure stare no longer fixed on the stage but on him, noting with some surprise that there were glistening trails adorning the cheekbones he had so often dreamed of seeing again. The tear streaked alabaster skin and Spike’s protective self hug then near collapse ‘flicked a switch’ for Xander.

With no further thought, he launched himself forward to collect the collapsing figure in a safe embrace, miscalculated a little, and consequently, found himself kneeling on the grass with the, now quietly keening, ‘lost’ friend in his arms.

“Sshhhhh,
I’ve got you,
I’ve got you….
Oh God Spike?!
How?
When?.......
I’ve still got your rings….. remember?!.....
I kept them safe like I promised”

Tears began streaming from the ‘good eye’, while Xander pulled the man closer to him.

“Ohhhh please!!!......
Please!!!
I know it’s you!
I lost you!
I lost you?
Oh Jeez..
How?
How?
Oh God, Spike.
I’ve missed you so much?
I lost you
You were dead
There was the end and you were dead
Oh God……..”

As Xander ended the one sided conversation, he gave in to his own sobbing, then instinctively opted for a gentle progression of kisses across ‘armed’ forehead, and in the process quietly removed the protective limb from its position over the man’s head to reveal, then cup, the chiseled chin with his left hand, and lifted the unforgettably beautiful face. Their foreheads connected and he stroked the long missed cheekbones with his thumb.

As he touched and caressed the man he had mourned for, for so long, the eloquent words he had composed to say to his friend and comrade, post apocalypse, simply evaporated.

Lifting the pale chin, he gave a husky, tear burdened “Hey” then automatically shifted to kiss a surprisingly pliant mouth. As they connected lips for the first time in almost a decade, he instinctively wound his right arm around the great coat and pulled their bodies together.

Eventually they both became aware of their position – very public, and mid city park. But the good citizens of Boston (and no doubt, a bunch of other places) had apparently done them the courtesy of moving a discrete distance away.

In a single, somewhat coordinated movement, they both rose to stand without breaking their embrace.

And just as Xander began to feel a little self conscious at his emotional display, a calm hand touched his shoulder and he registered the owner’s kind words, “Son, don’t you ever let go ‘o that boy…. I lost John to a damned gook shot in ’71…Should o bin me!….You got your friend back……don’t you *never* let him go!” Xander looked up to watch tears track down the face of a man old enough to be his own father (or even older) sharing in a tight hug with a stout woman, obviously his partner, as though their very existence relied upon it.

Spike must have heard also, as it was his tear thickened, husky answer that elicited a smile from the concerned couple, “’S bin eight som’t years, but what you said mate, ‘n worth every minute of the wait.” And with that, the vampire recaptured Xander’s lips in a final swift kiss, then hauled them up and away from the open space.

Now slightly hidden from the audience by a 'leaf-challenged' oak, Spike turned to the man whose hand he still held and inquired, "Bloody hell... so what now pet?"

Part Seven

Xander turned to examine his companion closely for the first time.

“I have no idea….What Now?.....” Xander looked again at the tear streaked face of his long lost friend – and ‘war time’ lover, “God Spike! You are still…. So beautiful!!….How??”


Xander’s free hand reached up to push away the stray lock of long hair that had fallen over the vampire’s right eye. His hand lingered by the cheek of his companion until he felt Spike lean into the touch. He had no way to catalogue or deal with what he was feeling anymore – there were emotions surfacing that has been so buried or denied that there was no longer even a point of reference – but for the joy that he was standing in front of a very solid, very real, Spike.

Xander did the only thing he could think of.

“Drink?”

“Oh Hell, yeah”

“Not a local. So…”

“I am”

“So…?”

“Fritz Lounge – be a walk but, know they’re still open”

With that Spike, hand still firmly joined to his rediscovered friend’s, headed for the path and down to the ‘main drag’ heading for the South End.

“I’ve got your back” Xander grinned and allowed the ‘Bostonian’ to tug him in the direction of the suggested bar.

Spike, meanwhile, heard far more in the ex Scoobie’s statement and mumbled, “You always did Harris….. Bloody Hell, we all knew that…. You always did.”


The walk was brisk, silent, and utterly tense until….half way to the bar, Spike hauled his companion into a side ally and pinned the brunette, back to the wall in an urgent embrace.

“Wha?” Xander’s words were cut off by demanding lips meeting his and hands sliding from shoulders to grasp his behind to pull their bodies flush.

“Oh G…… , Xan…… I’ve missed you…….. I’m sorry…. I’m *so* sorry…..”

Spike’s left hand drifted to the eye patch and Xander realized the source of the comment. Spike had always considered himself to be responsible for the injury. And though Xander would never believe that, he understood the need to remain silent, and stood motionless, holding his breath, and respecting Spike’s need to touch his scarred face at that moment.

When he felt it safe to move, Xander placed two hands on the chest of his friend and pushed away far enough to look him directly in the eyes. He had never seen Spike quite this emotional and noted that the vampire was truly struggling, visage wafting and waning between his demon and human appearance. Xander could not help wondering what had happened to Spike in the interim years from Hellmouth to here, but decided that questions of history should be addressed at another time.

As the golden eyes and ridges oscillated and settled for the third time, Xander leant in to deliberately kiss the fanged mouth of his long yearned for demon in a long and passionate engagement. He pushed his tongue forward, and despite the years between, expertly flicked it across the edge of an elongated, razor sharp canine, drawing blood.

He pushed past the pliant lips and shared his offering. Spike’s response was not the one he expected… a stream of blood tinged tears tracked from demon eyes, and the vampire in Xander’s arms began to keen as if in pain. For the second time in less than an hour, Spike fell to his knees, slid his arms around the thighs of his friend and buried his face in Xander’s shirt front.

The pain Xander saw in the yellow eyes that split second before the fall, had mirrored exactly the expression he had seen in the human face of Spike moments before they left the basement to meet their fate on the last day of Sunnydale. The emotion obviously transcended the emergence of Spike’s ‘demon within’ leaving him utterly open and vulnerable. As Spike began to rock them both slowly, Xander petted the soft hair and slid to his knees for the second time that evening.

One arm around the waist of his vampire and the other still stroking the hair, he eased Spike’s head down until it rested on his shoulder, fangs so close to his neck that in any other circumstances, or with any other vamp, the act would have proven fatal. Instead Xander heard gently whispered words, “Oh Xan, I’ve missed you. Everyone was gone and I was gone too. And I didn’t know how to tell you. I needed you pet. I needed you and I wanted you so badly. I’ve been so alone. And I lost you too. You were gone. All those years… and I didn’t know how to tell you…..; I want you Xan, always wanted you…..I need you so much….Please forgive me… Please forgive me….”

As litany slowly ended, Xander continued to rock the body in his arms, and he gradually became aware of the cool tongue laving the base of his neck, the strong hand stroking small soft circles on lower his back, and a deep, unmistakable purr coming from his friend.

Gently shifting his position, he whispered, “Hey…. hey…. S’OK buddy, but you know… Eu d’ Ally not so good for the night club admission yeah?” He continued to stroke the long locks, and waited a few more minutes. As the purring subsided, Xander began to wonder if his charge had actually fallen asleep.

Finally the weight in his arms shifted, Spike shook off the ridges and blinked up at Xander. In the dim light he looked for all the world like a four year old William just waking from an afternoon nap. He lifted his head and leaned forward to rest his forehead against Xander’s, then mumbled a heartfelt “Sorry… just… ahhh bollocks”.

He was just about to push away, when he caught the smile on his ‘captor’s face and the accompanying “Welcome back.” He returned the grin with a genuine smile, the likes of which Xander swore would launch ships, and in a bizarre twist of thinking, Xander instantly wondered if Helen of Troy might not really have been a boy….

“C’mon – I think we’ve done trying to walk places tonight, yeah? And in a line I am sure is going to be a quote from just about any 80’s B Grade porn flick….. Would you like to come back to my place?”

The taxi ride to Xander’s hotel in Back Bay had none of the tension of the preceding hour. Sitting side by side in the rather tired interior of the General Motors… whatever… Xander was pleased as his companion not only accepted the offered hand, but actively returned a squeeze of reassurance as they arrived at their destination.

The night manager emerged from the entry hall office as the antique bell chimed the alert for entering guests.

Xander gave his most charming smile and added “Hey John, ‘s cool - forgot to give in my key….so we’re good. You have a good night.” And with that, grabbed Spike’s hand and led his companion up the period staircase.

Hand on the door to 204, Xander was reminded of his own musings not two days earlier regards Spike, residences, and ‘past lives’ etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. *And it is only now I channel my inner Yul Brunner!*

Spike had no idea of the inner conversation – only seeing Xander pause as he went to open the door.

“’S OK mate. I don’t need to go in – Got my own place ‘n all. M’be see you tomorrow yeah?”

Xander, suddenly aware of his own indifference to the vampire’s state of mind , grabbed the hand of the companion he was apparently about to lose and pushed the door open.

Spike felt his world shift again.

As if the night had not been emotional enough, Spike was now looking at a suite that could have been any one of hundreds he and Angelus had shared ‘back in the day’. Nights of lust and love and….. Yet now here he was, waiting for an invitation, and hand in hand with a human he cared so deeply about, that it had been the stuff of his nightmares for years.

“Come in Spike, come in with me…..”

Suddenly quite self conscious, Xander realized that the large bed appeared very ‘slept in’ and the room occupied after it had been serviced. Also, that there was various modern detritus (such as still charging computer) marring the otherwise perfectly period setting.

Spike seemed at a loss, in fact Xander began to genuinely worry at his friend’s lack of response.
But was definitely reassured when a lustful, baritone voice ground out, “Got a bath in this ‘ere establishment?”

With those few words, all the years between their last time together, fell away.

“Yeah in there…. I’ll get it…” Xander wandered into the en suite, flicked on the taps and turned to rejoin his partner.

Part Eight

Xander stopped in the doorway to marvel at the scene in front of him and contemplate for a moment, the wonder of the evening so far.

Spike had slipped the coat off his shoulders and now stood absently stroking the top of a high backed chair, staring into the fire. Xander noticed that the brownish button down shirt without a collar was none of the usual colors he remembered Spike wearing. Face lit by the rosy glow of firelight, the vampire’s features appeared softer, younger, and there was an open vulnerability that Xander only remembered seeing a few times before.

Wanting to lighten the mood a little, he simply said, “Hey…… drink?” and without waiting for a reply wandered over to extract two beers from the well concealed mini fridge.

“Taa pet” Spike accepted the proffered bottle and dropped into the chair he had been caressing.

“’s a nice place, you holidayin’?”

The answer came from the bathroom as Xander switched off the water then returned to his friend. “Yup, just here for five days – figured I’d be here alone,” Xander wandered over to the second chair and sat,” You know touristy things solo. Kinda gets enough after five days. Mainly came to pay my respects to favourite Aunt - Agnes – well her ashes anyways.”

Spike who had been listening whilst intent on picking the label off his bottle, shot a surprised look to the speaker. “She a vamp?”

“What? Oh… No. God no!” then Xander grinned broadly and added “Don’t think her moustache would have looked any good on a game face anyways.

“Hey I’ve got an option of extending my stay an extra couple of days if something comes up. And I figure tonight, something just came up.” He looked over to Spike with a semi concerned stare and the unstated ‘if you want me to stay?’ Spike’s trademark smirk went straight to Xander’s groin. The blonde looked down, and the smirk became a genuine smile as he quipped, “Better do that then – ‘cause looks as there’s more than one thing has come up tonight, pet.”

Xander blushed and shifted a little in his seat then looked at the vamp a little sheepishly “Jeez Spike….”

A few minutes of silence ensued as they both contemplated the myriad of questions that could be asked. Xander finally settling on the most mundane “So you live in Boston now?” then groaned at the ridiculousness of how it had sounded. “Uuurgh! Yeah, hi and my name would be Xander State-the-obvious! Sorry Spike I’m just struggling a bit here. On one hand I want to ask you everything – you know what happened to you? why you’re here - in Boston, I mean? Why now – the finding and..? Are you OK? And then I get nervous cause, you know since all the meeting again and the…. I mean the kissage was….and I really want…. Ggahh a little help here?” He stopped abruptly and threw a pleading look in the vampire’s direction.

Spike was looking down at the near empty bottle in his hands and chuckling a little to himself, “Oh Luv…. I’d forgotten you breathe less than me when you get going.” Then in one swift movement he shifted from the chair and before the babbler even had time for a surprised squeak, he’d been scooped up, thrown over a slim shoulder and carried into the bathroom.

“Let’s start this right eh luv.” He gave the still startled man a lust filled look, then smiled sweetly and said “Care to bathe with me, Mr Harris?”

With those simple words, Xander’s knees felt rubberized and everything, including his brain-cells apparently, rapidly descended toward his groin.

Seconds later it was made worse, as Spike stripped naked and turned to face him. In that moment, he decided that he would forgo any visits to Boston’s fine Galleries – it would be pointless to go seeking things of beauty, as he was certain that he was now staring at the most exquisite object in the world. Even thinner than he remembered, the body was nevertheless stunning. Near translucent skin stretched over taut defined muscles and everything perfectly proportioned. For the umpteenth time that evening Xander groaned out a heartfelt, “God, you are *so* beautiful.”

“Well c’mon pet, don’t fancy washing your clothes too now do you?”

“Wha? Oh”

Xander broke his stare and began to fumble with the buttons on his shirt, successfully undoing two but apparently unable to extract a third from its hole.

“Here let me.” With that Spike proficiently stripped the man naked admiring Xander’s sleeker build in the process, then led him to the bath.

They were seated facing each other, legs touching, in the generous tub. Spike now with an unreadable expression on his face. Xander had removed his eye patch for the first time since they had met that evening.

“I’ll put it back on if it bothers you, even got a decent glass eye but it makes me look kind of crazy and it hurts after a while. Got glasses for work so you hardly notice the patch….”

“Shhh pet, it’s fine, ‘s you innit – ‘s fine cause it’s all part of you”

Xander felt his foot being lifted and a soft wash cloth began to track its way up and down his leg, first the outside then the inside. By its third pass Xander groaned and was painfully hard. Spike took up the other leg and began again, this time shifting his own right foot so it rested against the his bath buddy’s sex and gently rubbed the hardness in time with the other cleansing strokes.
The vampire pulled his charge further into the bath until Xander’s head rested on the end and legs were wrapped either side of a kneeling Spike. He felt the washcloth swirl around his navel and up over now hard nipples, then became aware of a second hand stroking over his balls and perineum.

He began to breathe more rapidly and closed his good eye in frustration when neither of the movements found his erection. He ground out “Oh G…Spike please….can you?...” The stroking stopped, the body in front of him shifted back a little and he gasped as the tortured member was engulfed tip to root by a cool mouth. Xander felt his balls squeezed and groaned, then panted as the mouth proceeded to suck hard in a leisurely rhythm – swallowing around him when at its deepest, humming as the mouth sucked up, and finally tip swirled and flicked by the tongue as the mouth almost left the top, then a swift plunge down again.

Xander opened his eye for long enough to register that Spike was underwater – courtesy of the ‘no need to breathe’ clause for vampires. He also noted that the tickling sensation all around his groin area was Spike’s long hair moving against him and that he was holding onto the tub with a grip in danger of making finger shaped dints in the iron. Spike picked up the pace, cupped the balls again with one hand and felt them tighten impossibly as he found Xander’s puckered hole and pushed a single digit in.

Xander arched in the tub climaxing immediately, and sending spurt after spurt of warm seed into Spike’s welcoming mouth. He opened his good eye in time to see his lover emerge from his underwater position, and lift the curtain of long hair that had completely covered his face revealing a maniacal grin.

“Just got meself a love of snorkeling I reckon.”

He was answered with a swift tug until he lay atop the human and a warm mouth claimed him in a passionate kiss.

Xander registered the rock hard member pressing against his rapidly softening one and felt the hips above him begin to undulate to try for some friction.

He broke the kiss, nibbling then licking across the bottom lip as he did, reached down to grasp the hardness and whispered “Got a nice place you could put that if you want.”

Xander heard a half moaned, half growled, ‘Bedroom” as Spike lifted himself off the human, stood to reach for a towel, then offered a hand to Xander and hauled him from the now tepid water.

Handing Xander a towel, they both moved in the direction of the more comfortable place for continued ‘reacquainting’.

Xander pulled the rumpled covers from the four poster then fell back onto the bed, his body replete and relaxed after their previous activities.

“You look knackered mate, wanna sleep first? ‘Cause I can easy fix this.” He stated looking down at his very erect appendage.

“Nope…. Really want you… want this…. Now” came the husky reply.

“K pet, what’s your fancy front or back?”

Xander took a moment to process the question then replied “Wanna see you, wanna see you when you come.”

Moments later the bed shifted and his ankles were nudged apart. He bent his legs further and let them fall open as Spike knelt almost as he had done in the bath. Cool hands began to massage across his torso and inner thighs, working their way down to his crease, a gentle touch squeezing the balls occasionally and finally rubbing firmly down to locate his rear pucker again.

“*Please* need you in me Spike!”

Hands still caressed the area as Spike asked quietly “You done this since… you know with blokes and such?”

Xander gasped as his perineum was stroked again “Few times, no one serious, no one good enough, not after you…. oh G…! Spike *please*” He lifted his legs further, and hooked an arm under each knee giving his lover complete access.

Spike took the hint and ran his cool tongue along the same path the hands had so recently been taking. The human gasped as it swirled around his pucker before pushing through the guard muscles and into the warm channel. Spike sucked on the outer skin, withdrew a little, then plunged the tongue as deep into the man’s core as he could manage. He grinned as a pass over the prostate was rewarded with a loud cry from his partner.

Xander pushed back toward the mouth then canted further his hips attempting to increase the penetration. Spike stilled him with a hand on his stomach, then withdrew his tongue.

#OK I’ll beg, begging is of the good… needing to feel – just want to feel filled, completed, utterly# “Please….please I need more!”

“Lube?”

Xander reached over to the night table and grabbed the small tube of moisturizer, handing it to Spike and returning to his previous position.

Xander heard the tube snick open and released an all too loud sigh of pleasure and relief as a slender finger found his rear entrance again and pushed in. He relaxed around the intrusion, reveling in the sensations already heightened from the deep tonguing. One digit swiftly became three and Xander alerted to his own ‘renewed’ interest by the hardness now spreading a steady dribble across his torso.

“Need you inside… Please, Spike now…..fill me with you.”

The fingers were removed, the bed shifted a little and he gasped then groaned in pleasure as he was entered in a single swift thrust. Spike then pulled out again until only the tip remained, and plunged back in, penetrating deeper than Xander thought possible.

“So hot pet, so tight and so hot, feels like you’ll burn me up…”

Spike leaned forward for a kiss with the next thrust, and at the same moment altered the angle slightly to pass directly over Xander’s prostate. The man’s cry of bliss muffled by his lover’s mouth.

Spike put a firm hand around the now leaking member between them and began to fist it in time with his own thrusts.

“Not gonna last Xan, come with me luv, come with me” With those words he sped up the rhythm and began to pant, then felt himself move into game face, his sac tighten and tingles start signaling the onset of release.

As if on cue, Xander came for a second time, his hot channel clenched and pulsed with each spasm, dragging Spike’s own climax from him, milking him until the vampire collapsed panting onto his lover’s broad chest.

Xander let his legs down, stilled for a few seconds, then began to stroke across the ridges on his partner’s true face and smiled as a predictable soft purring began. He watched until the beloved face gradually shifted back to human and Spike fell into a post coital slumber. Wrapping his arms tightly around the slim form lying on top of him, he mumbled “Beautiful” and joined his lover in sleep.

Part Nine

Xander woke to find a vampire snuggled against his side. He looked at his watch on the dresser, saw 8am and quickly realized that it would be daylight soon. Thanking the ‘God of Period Design’ for velvet curtains, he padded over to check that there were no gaps in the cover, then returned to the bed, tugged up the covers and pulled Spike back into his warm embrace.

His companion roused a little, slung his leg over Xander’s, nuzzled his bed buddy’s neck, then purred himself back to sleep.

Xander stroked the ends of the silky mane and listened, vaguely wishing he too could purr, then succumbed to oblivion again.

When he next struggled to consciousness, the first thing that struck him was how entirely relaxed he felt. That lovely heavy sensation only comes after a long, dreamless slumber. The second thought he had was how wonderfully soft and warm the bed was. And the third, that someone’s leg was languidly rubbing up and down between his, and that a hand gently massaged his scalp. He opened one sleep filled eye and found two crystal blue ones staring back.

“Afternoon pet.”

“Hey,” Xander lifted his hand to return the caress. “’Time ‘s it?”

“After 3, I reckon”

“Oh God! We slept practically the whole day?”

“Yeah well, ‘s not such a new thing for yours truly. ‘Sides I figured you were well shagged after last night and could use the kip.” Spike wiggled his scarred eyebrow, grinned broadly, then leaned in to grab Xander’s lips with a very determined kiss.

Xander’s body responded instantly, pushing forward then rolling on top of his smaller companion, and in the process pressing their ‘morning’ erections hard against each other. He brought his hands up to cup either side of Spike’s head, caressing cheekbones with his thumbs and deepening their kiss. The dueling tongues slowly calmed to match the movement of their hips, with neither game to break the pace as they approached completion.

Xander felt Spike’s change this time, responded by again scraping his tongue across a fang and pushing the blood into his companion’s welcoming mouth. He was instantly rewarded with an explosion of cold seed between them, immediately arched up and added to it with some of his own hotter version. He relaxed down squashing the residual puddle so it tickled down Spike’s sides and onto the sheets below.

A few minutes of rest later Xander, realized that he really would need the room serviced after this, and slid off his friend.

“Guhhhh, ‘K sticky becoming a real issue!”

Spike grinned and reached over to stroke the face of his companion, “You really mind luv?”

Xander’s face softened immediately and he leaned into the touch, “’course not. But… would you like to do something today – I mean….. you need to get stuff from home… Oh….” Xander trailed off as he realized. “I don’t have… ummm.”

Stopping mid sentence, Xander made a sudden decision, rolled toward the nightstand, fished out one of the spare razorblades and forced it hard across his own wrist. Despite its ‘safety’ claim, two thin red lines were left behind and welled into definite drips.

Spike smelt the blood immediately, “You alright pet?”

Xander moved the wrist until it was flush with the vampire’s mouth and said “My treat.”

Spike pulled back as he realized what was being offered, but was prevented from moving further by the begging look from Xander’s good eye.

“Please Spike, I want to… please, my treat.”

Spike stared at his companion in wonder, and shifting to partially into game face, took the gift reverently in both hands and drew it to his lips.

He licked the drops from the surface of the wound and with that his face changed completely.

“Bite Spike, ‘s OK, just bite, I know you won’t take too much.”

Spike allowed his fangs to press into the shallow cuts worrying them just enough to release more of their precious fluid then bit down fully. Both partners moaned at the first real draw of blood, and pushed their bodies together, touching wherever they could as the vampire continued to carefully feed.

Spike could not remember the last time he had fed straight from a vein, apart from exchanging with Angel in the early part of his illness, feeding from a lover was but a distant memory. And as far as sampling something as hot and sweet as the ambrosia that now passed into him…. never. But he stopped after only a few glorious mouthfuls.

After laving the wound with healing saliva, he fell back to stare dazedly at the ceiling. He closed his eyes with a feeling of utter bliss, the likes of which he could not describe, and absently noted that there were wet droplets of joy tracking from his eyes tickling past his ears to finish somewhere in his hair.

“Oh sweetheart, I’m sorry, I’m so, so sorry. I thought I was doing the right thing.”

Spike broke from his moment ‘in the light’ to register Xander’s distress.

“A taste of heaven will bring even the bravest man to his knees, dear heart.” And with that statement, Spike rolled to his side and looked directly at Xander, the adoration in his eyes reinforcing the wonder and gratitude expressed in his words.

Caught like a deer in headlights, Xander’s expression shifted from one of deep concern, to relieved joy as he realized the reason for his partner’s tears.

He reached over with the already healing arm and petted Spike’s hair. Spike matched the act by rolling further toward his friend, flinging his arm over the slim waist, he then proceeded to massage gentle circles repeatedly over Xander’s lower back.

After many minutes, Xander moved the stroking hand to cup one side of his partner’s pale face. With a grin he said simply, “So what are we going to do today?”

Part Ten

Deciding that caution was the better part of valor, the decision was made (post *independent* shower) that they did indeed need a visit to Spike’s abode at some point that evening – if only for the clothing, blood and ‘a laptop run’ – but should wait out the rest of the daylight in the hotel.

Pondering the need for new linen in his room, but not necessarily relishing the thought of being there as the other was removed, Xander was struck by a sudden idea. ‘High tea’ in the style of the Savoy, London, was offered in the small but elegant dining hall of the hotel and could not have been more timely or, Xander mused, more appropriate.

They were seated at a tiny two person table in the back corner of the ornate room. Still adorned with seasonal finery, there was also the obligatory chandelier, antique Edwardian style chairs, white linen and silver settings, and the appropriately stuffy Maitre D’ who seemed relieved that Xander was actually a guest when they arrived with no ‘prior booking’. The quiet tinkle of classical music from a miniature grand sitting in the bay window on the opposite side of the room enhanced the ambiance perfectly.

The tea of the afternoon was a choice of ‘Lady Grey’ or ‘Pekoe’, the position appropriately private, and the three tiered silver stand of food mid table ‘to die for’ as far as the now ravenous Xander was concerned. Bottom plate - assorted finger sandwiches; mid plate - delicacies in French patisserie style; and crowning glory - a plate of what Spike insisted were three enormous ‘scones’ and tiny crystal bowl of strawberry ‘jam’ (though Xander swore they were ‘biscuits and jelly’ but wasn’t in the mood to argue).

Accepting yet another refill of well brewed, piping hot tea, Xander noticed his dining partner whispering something to their young, and genuinely English, waiter. Shortly after, a small bowl of thick pure cream arrived on the table, along with a bottle of vintage Madiera and two crystal glasses.

“What the……?”

“No good doin’ things half measures pet.” Spike said, then leaned across the table and sang/whispered conspiritously:

"Have some Madiera, m'dear?
You really have nothing to fear..
I don't want to tempt you. That wouldn't be right.
One shouldn't drink spirits at this time of night.
Have some Madiera, m'dear.....
It's really an excellent year.
I don't care for Sherry, and one cannot drink Stout,
and Port is a wine I can well do without!
You see, it's strictly a case of 'Chacun a son GOUT....'
Have some Madiera, m'dear?"

“And could you be more ‘ancient British singing guy’ at this moment? In what *way* am I more informed by that?” Xander looked appropriately puzzled then grinned, as Spike lightly kissed then sucked the top of his ear, and withdrew.

Spike sat back, winked and grinned wickedly – obviously having the advantage over his companion regards what Xander now assumed, was the ‘rest of the words’!

Xander looked affectionately across at the refined features of probably the only person in the room who could truthfully compare the current menu to that of the Savoy in its early days, and had no doubt that Spike had eaten there more than once (though eaten who was perhaps more the point). Despite his current joy at finding his former ‘hellmouth’ lover, it was still to early to tell what the exact status of the ‘relationship’ was….. but assumed it to be ‘going quite well’ apparently.

Since earlier the previous evening, it was apparent to both parties at the table had, by mutual consent, focused their ‘rediscovery’ of each other on the more physical matters ‘at hand’. Yet Xander had begun to worry that they still had not ‘talked’.

*Behold folks - teenage girlie man, where’s Dawn when you needed her! Deep and meaningfuls, so not my forte.*

Despite the inner thoughts, food was still a priority. Xander reached for a minute ‘citron’ tart, and took another three of the tiny white sandwiches, dutifully avoiding all the ones with ‘green stuff’ in them.

He had tried one of that ‘color’ earlier, therefore providing Spike with great amusement, when, after the first bite of the ‘cress’ filled delicacy, he declared, with some determination that no person had the right to put grass in between bits of bread and pass it off as food – even if the crusts had been cut off!

Spike on the other hand, had openly enjoyed all the cucumber ‘fingers’ on offer. Then went on to devour the two tiny asparagus rolls decorating the middle of the sandwich plate, whilst expounding the virtues of county cricket along with the wonders of ‘bowling maiden overs’ and ‘good leg spinners’.

Xander really wasn’t listening by the time Spike started on some fielding position called ‘silly mid on’. Opting instead to nod and smile, whilst simply enjoying the rich sound of Spike’s deep voice and attempting to contrive a method of touching legs under the table without being too obvious.

Sometime after a glass and a bit of Madiera, Xander found himself ‘fortified enough’ to ask at least an easier one of the plethora of questions he’d composed in his head the previous night.

He twisted ‘his’ rings habitually, realized what he was doing, stopped, and asked:

“Hey so… you’re NonPerson?”

“Yeah”

“Did you figure it was me?”

“Not exactly MI6 pet, I mean ‘Xanman’? “ Spike gave Xander an incredulous look, took a deliberately slow sip of tea, then picked up his glass of Madiera again.

“Yeah but the internet, not exactly up with the ‘I’m the only one with that name’ clause?”

“Showed your hand with the feedback eh pet”

“Wha? How”

“Oh ‘cmon luv. I spent how long listenin’ to your lot, destroy the English language in old Sunnyhell. ‘S obvious innit… you write it, I get a feelin’, do a bit o’ the old ‘Net’ Sherlock and voila.”

“So you knew I was going to be there at the Common?” Xander now shifted a little uncomfortably in his seat.

“Only hoped pet… just needed to see you is all. Never meant…..’ Spike looked up at this point, noting with some distress, that the message being received was *not* the one he was trying to convey, and quickly amended.

“Hell Xander…. Luv…It had been so long – and you might have … family(?)… or …. And I just didn’t know how to say. But I needed to see you, and wanted …..but….” He trailed off, looked at his hands, now furiously plucking at some imaginary piece of lint on his napkin. Then looked up, begging for some indication of understanding, if not forgiveness.

What he received in return, was a message of such deep concern and love that he struggled to contain his tears.

*’S becoming a bloody habit!*.

Spike inhaled loudly then foiled his own thoughts with an easy, “So you like my stories pet?”

“Ummm yeah. God Spike I’ve been reading your stuff for months! It’s great – always suspected it might by a Hellmouth survivor but never…” He stopped again, looking up with yet another pained expression.

“Oh hell pet, let’s do this proper – c’mon”

Decision made and the better part of two hours of ‘high tea’ now, very literally, under their belts, Spike grabbed his friend’s hand, tucked what remained of the Madiera under his arm, and threw a generous tip on the table before departing.

Spike noted that it was already dark as they reentered the suite; that the room had indeed been cleaned; and that his companion had taken on the demeanor more befitting of a whipped puppy.

He switched on a couple of lamps and sat the dejected human on the bed.

“C’mon pet, there’s plenty o’ night hours to explore, let’s you and I clear the air yeah?” With that Spike dropped the bottle he’d been carrying onto the dresser and took Xander with a firm kiss that resulted in them both lying fully clothed on the covers of the now ‘made’ bed.

“Right. You all comfy ‘n listenin’? Cause I will not be repeatin’ meself. Clear?”

Despite the harsh words, Xander turned his head to see a predictably tense and vulnerable expression in the face beside him.

Seeing Xander turn Spike switched his gaze to the ceiling and waited.

“I do really need to know Spike.”


With that, Xander afforded the storyteller the courtesy of rolling onto his back and not looking at him, instead grabbed his friend’s hand – as much for his own comfort as any intent to calm the vampire, as painful memories were obviously to be revisited.

“Amulet. You remember, I wore it. Took out the First’s Army and burned me from inside to dust. Hurt like hell.”

Xander inhaled sharply, this part he had already pictured in his worst nightmares, but he remained silent.

“Yeah well, turns out the amulet had big mojo or some such, and I ended hauntin’ me old sire ‘round three months on. Best I could manage for a good while was moving a cup or two.”

“So, sorry to ask Spike, but, you were a ghost?”

“Well not technically ‘cording to the Texan chit, good sort she was too….” And again Spike trailed off for a few moments, then continued his account.

“Anyway got the body back – mojo again – ended up fighting for the white hats.

“Din’t know what to say to you lot, big finish an all – be a shame to try and top that.

“Andrew found out – poncy watcher in training or some such. ‘parently didn’t share that I was around with the wiccan mob, so figured I’d keep stum ‘n ‘all.”

Spike slowed, wondering if he could avoid the next part “You hear ‘bout the old boy?”

“Only that you guys took on most of the demons from Giles’ ‘big ‘n nasty’ file in one hit.”

“Yeah well them ‘n some. ‘One more time into the breach’ and all that rot.”

“ M’ sire copped a dragon talon. Nothing we could do after that ‘cept make the time we had…count.” At this point, Spike’s words broke. Xander rolled to face his friend, reached over, and pulled the slim shoulder until the vampire faced him.

Using the same hand to continue to pet and calm, he urged the speaker to continue, “And?”

Spike’s face screwed up in the anguish at the still raw memory “There was nothin’ I could do, nothin’…. And then he begged me to… and I couldn’t.. not….. and everyone else was dead….. and he was in *so* much pain.. I killed him, oh god, I *had* to kill him… he wanted and…..” Spike’s hand flew up to cover his face and he rolled entirely until heart broken sobs were muffled by both his own protective limb and the ample pillows.

Xander could do nothing but to move closer to his friend until their bodies were touching then continue to stroke Spike, offer meaningless words of comfort…..and wait…..

Eventually, the figure rolled back, his hand rubbed across wet eyes and slightly runny nose. The now tired looking, red rimmed blue eyes fixed on Xander as he whispered, “Dru dusted bit later, d’no how….”

“Oh Spike….” Xander brooked no argument this time, gathering the ‘man’ into his arms, some minutes later loosening the grip and asking “But Boston?”

“Sire ‘n I came back here, this side‘s where he landed back in the day…. bloody Irish heritage, snow in winter, that sort o’ thing… woulda gone all the way ‘cross the puddle ‘cept… Oh Xan, I missed you too…..but sire and then I couldn’t ……..” Spike’s voice broke again, as he gave in one more time to Xander’s loving embrace.

Xander acted as he had the previous night. He held his friend tight, and rocked him, and stroked the long hair while the man cried himself out. The difference was, that they were lying on a comfortable bed, and that Xander had joined his friend in the ‘hysteria’ this time. He shed tears for Spike, for what the vampire had suffered, for all they had both lost, and for their significant, but before now, unshared grief.

In the end, it was Spike who broke the hold first, moving his hand to run fingers through the dark ‘executive cut’, and pet the trim beard that had grazed more just than his chin last night (not that he was worried!) …..

“Ahh, luv, ain’t we just the pair?” He whispered, continuing to caress and stroke quietly, then resolved to wait.

The Xander he saw now, the beautiful man facing him, with tears tracking from one eye and scars of war obvious, was the summation of all the good Alexander Harris’s he had known: the abused boy, the ignored Scooby, the injured soldier, the loyal friend, the shamed groom, and the grieving lover. This coupled with so much more: the respected professional; the confident adult; the private person; and the unreserved lover. Spike was so proud of the man before him and despite his emotional state, tried to convey the message in his touch.

He caressed the face again, gently wiping away moisture from the good eye and touching lightly across the eyebrow of the one lost.

Xander roused, rolled onto his back and reached over to the friend who still stoked his arm.

He opened a now clear chocolate eye, ”Hey…”

“Cm’on pet. Let’s you ‘n I find a bar… and me a decent pint of O pos… No need for reasons now, ehh mate?”

Xander allowed himself to be pulled up, and genuinely relished the walk to the Fritz Bar – making an idle comment regards their two day journey to the same.

The bar itself was congenial and busy, Spike slipped out of Xander’s touch, only to return minutes later with a self satisfied grin. His human partner for the night, understood that necessary supplies had to be obtained, but was still a little nervous.

As the ‘anonymous black truck’ was seen pulling away from the back entrance to the club, Spike returned to their end of the bar, leaned over to his friend, attempted a lascivious grin and growled “Fancy dessert, luv,”. Xander would have been somewhat thrown but for the ruined ‘Big Bad’ impression radiating from the set of blue eyes that seemed to sing their gentle adoration and need for him.

By 2am, they were ‘back in the building’ at Back Bay, with both ‘gents’ encouraged by ‘dessert’ but apparently needing sleep.

Despite his five bag ‘bootie’ (3 pints of ‘good stuff’ and two of animal) obtained from a rather shady ‘contact’ early in the night, Spike seemed determined that they keep any references to his dietary needs to a minimum, while Xander insisted that he had no need for anything but a soft mattress and a hug (both of which seemed readily available).

As they stripped naked on their respective ‘sides’ of the large bed, the beautiful figure watching Xander broke the silence “There’s always tomorrow for hard stuff yeah? For now, why don’t we just hold on luv. Figure I just need to ‘hold on’….”

Xander, dived under his side of the down coverings, found the speaker willingly to consider just such an ‘amorous embrace’ idea, then was rewarded for his ‘mild abandon’ by the much adored, naked and hard body of Spike pressing flush to his.

A long relaxed kiss later, Xander pulled his cooler companion into a spooned hug and both succumbed to slumber. It was not until three the next afternoon that Xander had the opportunity to wonder at what could only be described as collective fatigue.

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