10 clues youre dating a bus driver
Mood:  mischievious
Topic: joke
10 clues you're dating or married to a bus driver

10. If he/she pre-trips the family car, daily.

9. If he/she reaches for a microphone, to speak to you.

8. If he/she waves with a smile, at all crossing guards.

7. If he/she has an emergency evacuation twice a year, when riding the Harley.

6. If he/she parks the car in the bus loading zone, during P.T.A. meetings.

5. If he/she has you sign off the pre-trip book, before you drive his/her pickup.

4. You're probably married to a special education bus driver if he/she only waits two minutes, for you to get out to the car.

3. If he/she writes up her/his children for bad behavior, in the family mini-van.

2. if he/she asks for a route sheet, to take you shopping.

1. if he/she stops at all railroad crossings with the emergency flashers on, in his/her clunker.

news joke of the day
Mood:  chillin'
Topic: joke
A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of seniors down a highway when he is tapped on his shoulder by a old lady. She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up.

After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts.

She repeats this gesture about five more times.

When she is about to hand him another batch again he asks the old lady,

"Why don’t you eat the peanuts yourself?". "We can't chew them because we've no teeth", she replied.

The puzzled driver asks, "Why do you buy them then?". The old lady replied, "We just love the chocolate around them."

today's joke
Mood:  mischievious
Now Playing: I can't drive 55
Topic: joke
A priest and a bus driver

A priest and a bus driver both died and went to heaven at the same time. They get to the pearly gates where St. Peter greets them. He motions to the priest, and they both hop in a jeep and go out the back door. There are about 50 acres of rolling hills with a little cottage on the knoll. St. Peter turns to the priest and says "This will be yours for eternity. A perfect little cottage, right next to a wishing well. Anything you wish on that wishing well will come true guarantied." The priest says, "Oh, thank you so much. This I shall enjoy!" St. Peter drops off the priest, goes back to the pearly gates and motions to the bus driver. They hop in a stretch limo and go out the front door. There are about 500 acres of land, with mountains and lakes and rivers. There is a huge castle on one of the mountains with about 200 rooms. St. Peter says "This will be yours for eternity. You can live in that castle with servants to wait on you hand and foot, and you can have everything you want." The bus driver looks and St. Peter and says "Well, now, don't think I'm not grateful, but shouldn't the priest get all this, not me? Shouldn't I get the cottage and 50 acres instead?" St. Peter just laughs and says "The reason you get all this is because when the priest preached, everyone fell asleep. Now, when you drove your bus, people prayed!"

joke for yesterday
Mood:  mischievious
Topic: joke
Penguin Delivery Service


One day, a bus driver is on his route, when he runs across a delivery van stranded at the side of the road. The van driver, who works for the zoo, pleads with the bus driver to do him a favor. He offers a $100 bill to the bus driver to help him deliver a truckload of penguins to the zoo. Agreeing, the bus driver proceeds to load two dozen penguins onto his bus. Then, off they drive towards the zoo. An hour later, the delivery driver gets his van fixed and heads off to the zoo to catch up with his delivery. As he?s driving down the road, he sees the bus driver and the busload of penguins heading in the opposite direction. He turns his van around and chases him, catches up to the bus and pulls over them onto the side of the road. He asks the bus driver, "I thought I gave you a $100 dollars to go and take the penguins to the zoo for me!" "Calm down," the bus driver says, "I took the penguins to the zoo. We had change left over, so now I'm taking them to the movies!"