Monday, 19 July 2004 - 9:35 PM EDT

The roster will be reviewed during the offseason. Only a few spots appear secure. I will leave all final decisions to my GM, but expect some changes.
===
Yes, the "balk" calls got in my head. How can you balk if no one is on base. I will be working on some new junk this off season so that we have a solid 1-2 punch next year. I apologize for not following game 1 with a solid game 2.

Monday, 19 July 2004 - 11:26 PM EDT

After the blood and the sweat dried up there were certainly tears. "Big Al, Little Hit" Thomas was an emotional mess as I dropped him off at his in-laws estate in sunny Sidman PA. He was making words look like second base as he stumbled over them in the same manner. "Bill," he said, "I don't know how I can face my co-workers on Monday." The leader that I am, I said, "Don't worry Big Al, they probably aren't going to talk to you anyway." I tried to call Big Al in the office today, he sounded like a disaster on his voicemail, telling customers to hit zero because that's basically what they get when they talk to him directly. Big Al was a no show on Monday, which made Monday exactly the same as Saturday.

Our owner made a very good point after the game 3 debacle in which the X-man gave up 4 runs on 5 hits in the 7th, and 8 errors by Canute, "Alot of Biscuits are going to hear the phrase, we've lost with you, we can lose without you."

Looking for long-term security will be my biggest goal this offseason. Bix has yet to make a qualifying offer so I anticipate becoming an unrestricted free agent. The GM's activity this offseason will directly affect whether or not I come back to the Biscuits. He claims to hope to resign me but no effort has been made and I will probably forced to sign elsewhere. San Francisco isn't going to happen because it's too close to Alcatraz. The other offers on the table are intriguing so stay tuned.

It will be interesting to see how the Billy "Big Fly" Barnes negotiations go. Big Fly will demand a raise on the two haircuts he was paid for playing in the tourney. Swanson got dinner, Barnes could at least demand a lunch. As long as the Biscuits aren't paying Canute by the error there should be enough left in the cookie jar to re-sign Big Fly.

Lets go Pens!

Tuesday, 20 July 2004 - 7:19 AM EDT

Bill gets it. He understands the game. This well thought out addition to the website indicates Bill wants the Biscuits to be the best. I was picking up everything he was laying down.....UNTIL the ridiculous "Lets go Pens!" comment.

Tuesday, 20 July 2004 - 6:47 PM EDT

Well, well, well, I guess I finally made it to the 'Bash Canute' website.
Let me start off by saying being the team player that I am, I agreed to leave my comfortable outfield position, my home if you will, to take on a more challenging, unfamiliar infield position. I'll admit that I made a few errors but I didn't see anyone else stepping up to tackle the most difficult position on the diamond. Asking an outfield wizzard like myself to play infield would have been like asking Willie Mays to jump up to shortstop. Sure he would have done it for the good of the team but is there where his talent rests? No, of course not so I don't think the burden should be placed on me. I'm Jim Edmonds-like in the outfield but talents were never to be seen b/c of a coaching strategy that placed me at SS or 2B. Who was managing this bunch of misfit toys? Why wasn't a second coaching change made? If Barnes was so damn good, why didn't he move up to SS?
If Bixby and Stouffer were so brilliant why were they parked behind the plate? Christopher Reeves could have contributed as much behind the plate as those two did.
At the end of the day I can rest my head in peace knowing that I gave it my all and left everything out there on the playing field.

That being said, I must submit my resignation/retirement to the Montgomery Biscuits. I don't feel comfortable playing for a team that doesn't respect me or my abilities. We went out there as team, we won as a team but in defeat - it was Canute. I don't need the additional stress and headache and will be shopping my services elsewhere for next season.

Thanks for the memories and thanks to those who supported me through all the tough times that got me to the 'Bigs' but in the end I would like to give a solid F YOU to those beotches who dissed me.

---Nute


On my way home, police car pulled me over.
After they left, I puttered out of gas.
Triple-A' came, but my card was expired!
I had to walk home, and of course, it rained half the time.
I tried to get some shut-eye, then I was abducted!
They put cold things in my butt.
They sampled a bit of my D.N.A.
They left me on top of my sheets,
I dreamt I went potty, then woke up drenched in me.
This day sucked the hardest ever...
I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today.
A little bit less than nothing would go my way.
I got up to toss my soiled sheets,
the hallway was dark and I stubbed my big toe.
It was then that I sensed the irony (burning me),
then I heard the voice say,
"Come sail aboard S.S. Nepenthe!"
I suppose I'm to blame for getting pulled over.
I guess I'm the culprit for running out of gas.
Let's assume I'm the guy who didn't pay his 'Triple-A' fee.
In actuality, I let the zetas probe me.
Yesterday was all my fault.
I let negativity get the better of me.
Thank goodness for the bathtubs and suds!
They temporarily set free this quandary.

Tuesday, 20 July 2004 - 7:00 PM EDT

Negro Assasin Ima dig a ditch bitch and throw your ass in

Tuesday, 20 July 2004 - 9:34 PM EDT

I think Charley's last name should be

Fonzarelli

Tuesday, 20 July 2004 - 9:35 PM EDT

I think Charley's last name should be

Fonzarelli

Tuesday, 20 July 2004 - 9:42 PM EDT

"Nute" makes a good point here. Why would you vote for Stouffer for MVP when all he did was get on base. "Nute" batted a solid .053 , struck out 6 times and dropped, missed or bobbled 87% of all chances.
The only one worse might have been Al "Vomitor" Thomas. He hit a solid .104 , argued with the ump and runs like he has an anvil on his back. Of course The Vomitor turned an ordinary slid into the barrel roll.
Jeff Smith started strong on the maiden game, but suffered a similiar end to the Titantic. He folded up like a cardboard box. On the field, he provided less direction then a Jim Turcovski Face Sheet Note.
Swenson, Swanson or whatever his name is should find the Maryland leagues more to his liking. He won't be back.
Charley x?

Tuesday, 20 July 2004 - 9:42 PM EDT

I couldn't play shortstop because I'm left-handed, you moron!

Regards,

Big Willie

Tuesday, 20 July 2004 - 9:44 PM EDT

If I win the wiffleball on Ebay would you autograph it it let it role around in your jockeys for a day or tow

Tuesday, 20 July 2004 - 9:46 PM EDT

If I win the wiffleball on Ebay would you autograph it it let it role around in your jockeys for a day or two

Tuesday, 20 July 2004 - 9:51 PM EDT

It is with great pleasure that I announce I will be back as Coach and GM for next years Biscuits. I am in the process of finalizing plans for a new stadium in my backyard.
Please note I can alter or delete any comment added to the site. There have been 5 posts that have been deleted that have referred to Stouffer as an "Ass Monkey" I do not know what this means, but I will continue to delete them.
Other News, Please weigh in if Charley's last name should be Fonzarelli? I like it, but lettering a shirt would be expensive.

Tuesday, 20 July 2004 - 11:10 PM EDT

My defense certainly can be questioned, however, it did not contribute to losing any games. This poor young punk from J-town played with a bum wing and a big heart. There is no way I could have thrown the ball and I agree to being lackadasical at best as catcher/DH. Bix and I were in the tourney for our bats and speed. Smitty was handing out K's like stripper trading cards in Vegas. I was mesmerised back there myself. Next year I will be out in the field while some others are watching the Biscuits on TV. The Ebensburg office is proud to announce that our newest hire who starts on August 2nd was hired exclusively with the Biscuits in mind. Lets just say he was MVP of the Altoona city league. Throw in a healthy JR Ross, who was nursing a bum leg, and the farm system has just delivered again. Great drafting. We will win it all next season, I guarantee it. Write that down. I'm not touching the Turcovski comment; Nappy would need a step ladder to hack at most of the pitches and his Biscuit days were over before they ever started.

Tuesday, 20 July 2004 - 11:14 PM EDT

we heard you the first time jackass

Wednesday, 21 July 2004 - 1:30 PM EDT

Somebody pass Turcovski a ladder

Wednesday, 21 July 2004 - 3:50 PM EDT

Mmmmmmmmmmm.........buscuitsssss.

Thursday, 22 July 2004 - 4:43 PM EDT

Dear old guys:

A couple of questions and comments:
1. Thanks for taking out that gray haired pitcher. The sun glare off his head was makin' it hard to hit.
2. We haven't seen a shortstop with no hair and less range since Cal Ripken retired.
3. Why didn't you let that Swanson guy just keep on sleeping in the van?
4. What is Charley's last name?
5. That big guy got lucky on his big home run. The rest of the game he stood around pressing his red rocket into the backstop.
6. That left handed guy had a nice hit but he runs like a girl.
7. WAS. How about WASN'T?
8. Big Al? How about Little Contribution?

Thursday, 22 July 2004 - 7:56 PM EDT

We have some off-season news and big news at that. Today, I have a major announcement.
I am pleased to announce the signing of JR Ross of Johnsown. Ross has all of the skills and talents to move our organization to the next level. The contract is for one season with an option.
Obviously this means we will have to formally send somebody to the waiver wire. I plan on letting the people speak. Pleae vote on who should be eliminated.
More info to follow.

Thursday, 22 July 2004 - 8:53 PM EDT

I would like to go on record saying "Ragtop" is a jackass.

Friday, 23 July 2004 - 8:46 AM EDT

I vote to eliminate Jeff Smith.



LET'S GO PENS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, 23 July 2004 - 9:02 AM EDT

not smitty, he must stay

Friday, 23 July 2004 - 11:32 AM EDT

Some last names I've been kicking around for Charlie?

Faucher - Charlie Faucher - Meet the Faucher's
Stiles - Charlie Stiles
Boots - Charlie Boots
Rotten - Charlie Rotten
Brown - Charlie Brown
Bixby - Charlie Bixby
Lo Tito - Charlie Lo Tito
Mark Jourdain

Friday, 23 July 2004 - 12:17 PM EDT

Jeff "the Gray Ghost" Smith will return again to the Biscuits next year. The owner says so. He will be involved in a rigorous off-season training program to develop some new and/or improved junk pitches. Charlie X just wasn't getting it done.

Saturday, 24 July 2004 - 2:29 AM EDT

the person with the most errors should go.......nute sure who thats gonna be