Yeah, whatever.

Isn't blinking (expletive deleted)annoying?

This is me at age 14. I'm much better looking now.

Yeah, here's everything original on my page...or if you're Bob Zanicky, there's nothing original anywhere, especially on this page.

Ok, I didn't come up with this one...it's still good, though.

It's the THE SWINGERS RULES. Written by Vince Vaughn and Jon Favreau, learn the wisdom behind the men.

NEW!NEW!NEW!NEW! I SAID NEW, BITCH!

It's the Sage Stevens Sucks Homepage! Sage is just someone who sucks, and I think that the world should know about it.

Bomb Ass Places To Shop in San Francisco

Yeah, that's right. I'm in SF right now, and here's some places you don't wanna miss, dig? Cause there's just some shit you don't find in tour books, like where to find Adidas wind pants, you know? Check it out, Shnooka.

These are the Daves I know. There's probably a few other people there, too.

Ok, there's probably no Daves at all. Other people I know are present, however. This is a clever way of sending you to my links page.

The IUP Party Scene.

What really goes down at the Indiana University of Pennsylvania campus every weekend...let's you know what's going down, what you've heard about what's going down, rumors about when the White House is partying again, and where the Beast Ice can be found. PLUS: Now includes "Bitch, Walk Yo Ass Back to Langham," the shocking story about one night hook-ups at IUP that "The Man" at the Penn didn't want you to read! Learn of the perversity that occurs.

PLUS! COMING SOON!

THE *** CORNER-Pictures of *** passed out all over Indiana! Plus what Jeff is drinking these days(most likely Beast Ice), and pictures of him and his socks.