I keep repeating the same ineffective escapes
Knowing I should change does not help me adapt
When another day starts, I'm still not done
I wanted to win yesterday, and I didn't have time
I don't think I gave up, so maybe I just lost
Now my weakened armor is no match for anything else
I just ignore it, listen to music that makes sense
Like getting high in a bunker as the bombs rain down
It seems the same to be above or below the ground
Talking to myself, getting nowhere, I don't understand
I can't explain, I walk around, movement with no distance
Through it all I'm in one spot in my mind, frozen fire
Contradictions to each thought that forms thick like fog
I keep questioning despite realizing there are no answers
These days are a numbing rerun episode of five years ago
Another midlife crisis before I've reached the typical years
Perhaps I'm making the mistake of trying to relive what's done
It's funny how nothing stays the same, so funny I fall
I'm laughing about it more than you are so just shut up
My body constructed in irregular form, no chair fits me
Everywhere is uncomfortable, I can't stop turning
You're looking at me and I'm afraid you will see too much
I'm so lacking in expression, so muddled in my speech
I'll talk for hours and reveal nothing at all, once again
Right now, at this moment, I feel there is NO relief
I can't think of anything that might happen to help
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