All By Myself

Everyday, I will go to work as normal... When I have people around me, I can still be fine... but whenever I return home again, I will breakdown into tears... Don't wanna to eat... Don't wanna anyone to find me... Don't wanna to do anything.... In my mind, I can only think of all the happy times I had with him... Every corner of home, I can think of something that has to do with him...

Everyday, I will hope that he will come back to me... Every moment, I will wait for that sound of his keys opening the door.... Hoping he will return home to me and everything will be normal again... day by day... month by month... I am still sitting home alone... Don't even know what i am waiting for and why I am still here...

For the first month, he will still contact me at least once everyday... see me for 5 minutes at work... or give me a phonecall... but then, his concern for me faded away as time goes by... How can he share any of his time with me, when his mind is so occupied with another girl??

I remember once hearing a radio show in Hong Kong... A girl rang in and told the radio host how disappointed she is when her boyfriend for 10 years has left her all the sudden... She said, "When your partner don't have anymore love for you, he will leave you without any hesitation... No reasons or excuses, when the time has come, he is just going to leave you there... All that you have treasure for your relationship.. the past, the happiness means nothing to him when he has to say goodbye..." Sometimes I just wonder how he can do that to me... Did he ever love me at all??