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VetWives™ List & FAQ

VetWives™ List FAQ Please read the FAQ below before subscribing to the list!!! Thank You!

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VetWives™ Mailing List FAQ

This is the FAQ for the VetWives™ mailing list. It attempts to answer questions that have arisen on the mailing list and is intended to be used as a policy guide.

This FAQ is written by Shirley Watkins. It was last updated on Aug 10, 2006. Its home on the web is at:


(1) What is VetWives™?

VetWives™ mailing list is a forum for the family members of Veterans. The Veteran can have served in any branch of the service at any time.

(2)How do I subscribe/unsubscribe to the list?

Post message:



List owner:

URL to this vetwives™ email list settings:

(3) Is there a digest version?

Yes a digest version is available. Go to the yahoogroups website and adjust your settings there or send an email to


(A) How did this list begin?

This list began because I am a wife of a 100% service connected disabled veteran. My husband served during the Vietnam War. I hunted for a place to go where I could talk to women who are in a similar situation as mine and could not find any place.

There are many rooms for the vets themselves to go but not much is available for the wives and other family members.
This list was started in Jan 1998 as an off shoot of the VetWives™ Chat, as a way of helping other members of the list come together to share their experiences. The list has been expanded to include all family/friends of veterans.

(B) Who maintains this list and where can I ask questions?

This list is maintained by Shirley Watkins. If you have any questions or are having trouble subbing or unsubbing or would just like to talk with me please feel free to email me at


VetWives™ List rules. Hopefully these guidelines will help the list run smoother.

ATTN: This is a HIGH VOLUME list (approx 80 - 100 emails per day)

SUBJECT headings:
Keep clear subject lines, if you are replying to a post and the subject changes then change the subject heading.

SHORT messages:
If you are just saying "loved it", "thanks", or something along those lines just type that in the subject line and type /NM for no message, that way we can just scan thru and delete those messages knowing there is nothing else to be read inside, speeds up things for those of us who deal with a high volume of email. If you reply to a message please remove the /NM out of the subject line so that we will know there is a message in the body.

Yes they are allowed onlist but we do have a separate list just for those and prefer to keep the majority of them there so that it doesn't clog up this list too much. Be aware that the jokes list is uncensored, any content is allowed.

It is a requirement that you participate in this list. If you are a member your are required to post a message of introduction when you join and to post at least once per month. This is a participation required list, no one is allowed to sit silent in the background. Too many people join a list and then just sit and not post. If you do not regularly post to this list you will be removed from this list.

Please be aware that children, grandchildren, young adults, or sensitive
adults may be viewing the content of your message so please refrain from
using profanity or vulgar language. If you do send jokes to the vetwives™ list please edit them, the jokes list is not censored so feel free to post whatever over there.

PATIENCE, Love, Tolerance:
We are a very diverse group of people coming from all types of backgrounds and as such we have many different opinions on any subject matter. Please always think before you post anything that may be upsetting to someone else on the list. Sometimes we fire off a post before thinking it through, especially if angered, stop and cool and think before replying. No flames will be tolerated. We are all adults and as such I feel that we can conduct ourselves in an adult manner and if we have a disagreement with someone then it should be taken up between yourselves off list. If you need any help of any kind please feel free to email me. I am always here to listen and will do my best to help out if possible.

This will not be tolerated. You will be given a warning on 1st offense, 2nd you will be placed on moderated status (moderated: your posts will have to be approved before going to the list) 3rd offense you will be removed from the list.

If a member of this list posts a message for any person that is on moderated status it will result in immediate removal of both parties. In other words if another member asks you to post for them you best be aware that if they are moderated and using you to get their messages past the owner or mods then you will be leaving the list with them immediately no questions asked.

Anytime a member has to be removed from the list under disciplinary actions they are not allowed to return.

Attachments are allowed on the list, if you have a pic you wish for
everyone to see you can upload it in the shared files or photo album area of our list at the yahoogroups website. We do have a list just for attachments:

We deal with very private parts of our lives here on the list and as such we ask that you not forward any private material outside this list without the express permission of the author. I try to keep this as closed a list as possible in this area to protect the privacy of those on the list. I know it is not possible to enforce this completely but I am trusting that you will abide by this rule if you don't abide by anything else on this list. It could mean the difference in someone's safety. In other words you have their life in your hands.

Also I do not want private topics of discussion here carried to other lists you may be on, especially if VetWives™ member names are mentioned without permission. Again this is hard to control but if it's being done eventually it will get back to me. If you have a problem with something or someone on this list, DO NOT discuss it on another list you may be a member of. What goes on here stays here!!! If found to be violating any privacy rules set forth here you will immediately be removed from the list without question.

Forwarding poems, urls, etc is ok, if in doubt please feel free to ask. And feel free to tell others about our group. Mentioning VetWives on other lists as a promotion is ok, but slandering members or posting their private information is a gross violation of the rules. We do have a wonderful caring & giving group here that will go out of their way to help anytime it's needed.

Forwarding of private material to anyone without permission is grounds for immediate removal.

Most, if not all of you, know that I am very adamant about not allowing reporters, thesis writers, etc here to analyze us or to use our experiences for employment or monetary gain. If you are subbed to this list under false pretenses I ask that you remove yourself immediately. If found out you will be removed immediately from this list.

If you have subbed with a false identity, and have posted false information about yourself to the list you will be removed immediately.
If you can not be open and honest with us then we can be of no help to you. (example: pretending to be a vetwife when you are not; pretending to be dealing with a veteran to gain information; resubbing under an assumed name after being removed from this list.)

If you access this list through someone else’s email address and post to the list via another’s email address and you are not a member yourself you are in violation of the list rules and the person who is allowing you access via their email address will be removed.

Any questions????

Feel free to contact me at any time for any reason. If you do not feel comfortable talking to me or can't get hold of me please contact one of the co-moderators of the list: Terri @; Marge @

Shirley Watkins
List Owner

To join our other lists: (NW United States Vetwives™) (Vetwives™ living in the Midwest US) (Widows list) (Attachment List) (jokes list)


Shirley Watkins
Disclaimer: I am not responsible for any content on this list.

To join our other lists: (NW US Vetwives™) (Vetwives™ living in the Midwest US) (Widows list) (Attachment List, Restricted to VetWives Members Only) S (jokes list, Restricted to VetWives™ Members Only)

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