I've finally bought in, too.  Into day trading, I mean.  Having now spent 14,808 days in a row with nothing much to show for it, I might as well try trading a few.  After all, what have I got to lose but a bit of my time?  

     This September 10th seems as good a day as any to start with.  September 10th doesn't have any sentimental value to me at all.  True, Commodore Perry defeated the British in the Battle of Lake Erie on this date back in 1813.  There's nothing that says I can't shift that fact to September 9th before the new owner can take possession.  Worse things are done all time.  Did you know that back on September 3rd, 1752, the powers that be traded up to the Gregorian calendar and suddenly it was September 14th?  Eleven days were lost forever - just like that!  Shifting the date of Perry's victory is less than petty theft in comparison.
     Ok, I know what you're thinking: "But, Dan - what about the fact that Gunsmoke premiered on this date back in 1955?  What about that?!  Huh??  Huh???"
     Let me state right now and quite clearly that the September 10th I'm planning on trading as soon as the software can be downloaded comes complete with this gem of television history mounted smack dab in its center.  I loved Gunsmoke.  I especially loved the episode in which Dennis Weaver's lame Chester character forgot to limp.  But sometimes we have to be willing to give something of value up before we can sucker others into giving us something of even greater value.
     As for the fact that this also just happens to be Fay Wray's 92nd birthday, all I can say is this: She's lucky that big ape didn't kill her back in 1933.  She's lucky she made it to 27 let alone 92.  She doesn't need me to keep and treasure her birthday to feel good.  She just needs to go sneer at the monkeys at the Bronx Zoo.  She can even come and sneer at me anytime she wants for just $5/hour.  Let's get real.

     I'm not sure what date I hope to get in exchange for this September 10th of mine but I figure if it gives me just 10% more happiness I'll be doing much better than the typical guy slaving away on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange. 
     I'm not planning on screwing anyone out of their first Christmas or their wedding day.  I don't want to cut in on anyone's dream vacation or reign as Miss Montana.  But it would be nice if I could get myself a day bearing enough interest that it makes it worthwhile to go to bed a little early for.  It would be nice if I could get ahold of a 25-hour day so that I might even get a little bit ahead.
     This living midnight-to-midnight every day and every day, spending every minute the moment it comes in, hardly seems like living at all sometimes....

     Looking back, I realize now that I should have sought advice in how to invest my time a long, long time ago.  I've never had much of a knack for spending my hours very wisely.  Whenever a new labor saving device came along and allowed me to save a few minutes, I always seem to have frittered them away eating chocolate and then napping. 
     Some times I've never figured out what to do with. 
     Like all those hours spent in doctor's waiting rooms.
     And all those awkward minutes spent with someone just before the bus or the train or the car or the plane came and separated us for weeks or months.  What can you do with such tiny little bits of time, so incapable of giving you the lasting meaning you crave?  Might as well try capturing an ocean with a thimble....
     The Italian poet, Leopardi, wrote of seeing a beautiful horizon and wanting to go hug it.  I've often felt the same impossible impulse when in the midst of a beautiful moment.  Alas, we can no more hug such a moment than we can the horizon.  So what do we do instead?  Simply enjoy it, if we're lucky enough to be wise; self-consciously feel it slipping through your fingers with each tick of the clock, if you're me....

     But I believe the software I need has just about finished downloading.  Time to carpe diem!

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     Back!  I almost didn't make it.  This day trading business isn't nearly as easy as they said it would be in the brochures.  It's really a miracle I have a moment left to my name.
     I thought I'd do alright with a clean, little-used day like today.  I thought I'd at least come out even.  Ha!  First I got stuck with an unseasonably cold October 3rd belonging to an old woman in a New Haven rest home, then I got tricked into trading that for a day in the life of a penniless child living on the streets of Calcutta.  Thank goodness he agreed to accept payment one hour a month for the next 24 months.  Thank goodness I didn't end up permanently stuck in some West African clinic's hallway dying of malaria like a much more experienced trader in the url adjacent to mine!

     Guess this little September 10th of mine isn't so bad, after all.  Sure, its p.m. looks to be a little longer than its a.m., and its afternoon will probably drag a bit as a result, but hey - at least it's not shedding deadly bacteria all over my life.  And even if it just ends up sitting on my week looking stupid like so many of my dates do, at least its mere presence there will keep my Thursday from running smack dab into my still-sleeping Saturday.

     What the hell - I think I'll go try to make friends with it....