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A Real-Time Saga:
"I Did WHAT???"
(Part 1)

Okay, I'm just gonna say this now, this one's . . . bad. This one is sickeningly bad! I write in a way I probably have not written for about two years now. It's gonna be messy, and I know someone out there is DEFINITELY going to be upset with me. But, the story must evolve; it must unfold . . .




This one goes back about a week, me thinks. I was walking home with my other other people (yes, I am officially a floater again!) when Gavin turned the corner to get to his own house.
"Hey Ern!" he calls to be abruptly before leaving. "Get back here, I have something to tell you!"

I told my people I'd catch up; I then turned around to get back to Gavin.
"Whadayou want?" I asked. He told me,
"Okay, alright, um . . . . . so I know of a particular person that wants to go to grad with you." Oh God . . . figures he'd tell me something like this . . . . . I ran some names through my head as I said (somewhat apathetically),
"Really . . ." to which he instantly replied,
"Yes!" There was then a short pause. " . . . . . . . So do you wanna know or what?"
"Fine . . ." He looked straight at me with a funky (in the bad sense) grin.
"Corin." I half-smirked, raised my eyebrows, and cocked my head to the left quickly (ooh, I'm so talented).

"So? Whadayathink?" Gavin asked anxiously (and yes, I DO mean it in the "nervous" context).
"Ah, I'll tell ya later," I said, still sounding very apathetic.
"Aw, come on!"
"Go home, ya bum!" I recall I did a finger-gun-pointing thing to him as I backed away grinning. But yeah, we said our good-byes, and that was that.

So I suppose you're all just DYING to know who this Corin is, huh? Well, she's this person I had a . . . . . class . . . with last year (yeah, you thought I was gonna say something else, didn't ya?). One of the most vivid memories of that class is how she'd throw these stupid little paper balls at me and my buddy (who sat next to me). We, in turn, would then turn around and pelt her with a volley of "Hilroy-vengeance". Yeah, those days were fun . . . Incidentally, she was also in the calculus class I so callously dropped all those months ago. Oh well, whatever . . . . . that class probably sucked anyway (and yes, the fox WAS right when he assumed the grapes were probably sour).

But yeah, in the week leading up I somehow found myself running into Corin a lot more - call it coincidence if you're not seeing what I'm getting at, okay? Nonetheless, I still wasn't totally sure what I was going to do about the whole shebang (wow, 'shebang' doesn't get underlined in red in Microsoft Word - go fig . . .). Thoughts and visions were still totally in the "what if?" stage. It was pretty bad:

She's got a great smile and sense-of-humor combination.
She lives in a totally different world from you.
You know you love the insult-wars.
You know her name is deathly similar to your younger brother's.
If you heard right, the girl is interested in you for some strange reason.
Your oldest friend doesn't think much of her for some strange reason.
Gavin seems pretty optimistic.
It's Gavin . . . . .

Speaking of Gavin, that bum just wouldn't leave me alone about it! Almost every day I'd be online and he'd talk about it.

Sooooooo?

So what?

Are you gonna?

Gonna what?
(Yeah, I think I'll play dumb with him; it oughta piss 'im off . . .)

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK?

The hell should I know??? I'm just minding my own business, and you start bombarding me with GOD knows what . . . . .

Agh! Fine, I'll be blunt, but don't bring your deity into this anymore! Are ya gonna ask Corin to the prom or what?

Prom? Did you just call it "the prom"? What crazy 49th parallel & below city did YOU come from?

Hey, watch it boy, or I'll give ya a whupping! Alright, are you gonna ask Corin to GRAD or not?

Huh? Oh that? Oh, well I'd love to chat a bit about that, but I've gotta get to sleep.
(Quick side-note . . . heeheeheeheehee!)

What? Noooo! You can't do that! I forbid you to do that!

Yeah, but whadayagonnado?

Ernie! Come back here you bastardised prick!

Tee hee. Nighty-night Gavinowski!
(LYNX Internet - disconnect.)

And yeah, that's more or less all we did for the whole week. He'd bug me, I'd dodge him - yeah, good fun. And yeah, it was inevitable that I was going to have to make a decision sooner or later.

Well, the decision was suddenly made easier by the next day - I had another one of those damn dreams. Really it wasn't anything - just lots of chaos and random entropy. But yeah, I know I was there (obviously), Corin was there . . . and I think Matthew Perry and ET were somewhere in there too (don't ask, I don't even know). But yeah, if you put "Chandler" and "some long-necked weirdo trying to phone home" aside, it was a pretty sick dream - I mean more so. I mean, picture the ABSOLUTE WORST flirting you have EVER seen in your life, blow that up 10 times larger, photocopy leaflets of it, then get them dropped by B-52 bombers over EVERYTHING! It was THAT bad. But yeah, the dream was nonetheless . . . nice, in a demented "PG-13ish" fashion. Plus, it did ease my brain a little bit.

If you haven't guessed yet, I ultimately decided to ask her to grad.