**Nick**
I had thought about her all week long. We had done a show tonight and I was dead tired. Right now, I really wished she was with me. Most of me thought I wouldn't see her for three months but with the extent of the damage, I would probably never see her again. But then again, I don't care. I don't care! We had never worked out from day one. Last night, I had picked up my cell phone a couple of times to call her. Once I even dialed her number but I quickly hung up. I'm so stupid to think she'd ever want me back. I'm a jerk, and a loser, and a-
"Nick!"
I stopped staring out the window and looked to see Brian and Jessica standing there. "Huh?"
"Welcome back, Frack!" Brian said.
"What do you guys want?"
"Well," Jessica started, "we figured that since you guys just finished a show-and a great one once again!-that you would be hungry so we're going out to grab something to eat."
I shook my head. "No. I'm not hungry."
"What, Frack? You're always hungry!"
Screw you, I thought. I took a deep breath. "It's just that...I don't really feel like getting something to eat. Going out again...I just don't wanna."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah. I'll just order some room service or something."
Brian looked at me strangely. "Okay then. I'll see you later."
I waved them off and turned back to look out of the windown. When I heard the door close, I sighed, stood up and collapsed on the bed. This week had been hard. I had gone on the internet, which I shouldn't have, and had seen things that made me sick to my stomach. Things about me! It was just too much. The guys have no idea what's going on with me. I know. And I know that if I ever told Jess, she would tell Kayci and then Kayci would really have a reason to hate me. I don't like being like this; I don't like doing this to myself, but...I can't help it.
"So tired...so tired," I mumbled. A tear slid down my face as I stared up at the ceiling. "I need help. I need Kayci! I...I can't do this alone."
**Kayci**
Only three weeks had passed and Jessica was coming home. From what she told me, her and A.J. were going strong and I'm sure that I'll be seeing a lot of him soon enough. They had cut the tour short because Kevin had fallen off a stage, or something. I made a mental note to tease him about that. But all in good time.
I heard a knock at my door. I ran through the condo to the front door, flew open the door and saw Jessica standing there with A.J. behind her.
"Kayci!" she shrieked and hugged me.
"God, you're finally home!" I yelled. I pulled away and looked at A.J. and we both smiled. "Hey, loser!"
A.J. laughed and hugged me. "No," he said. "I'm not the loser. I think you have me confused with someone else." A.J. stood back and pointed at the door.
I gasped. "A.J.! There's no one there!"
A.J. turned around and grunted. "Damn it. One second." A.J. went outside and in a second, he dragged in a a head of blonde. "Sorry."
Oh my God. No. No! Jessica wouldn't do this to me. A.J. would, but not Jessica. But-
"Sorry, Kayci," Jessica said. She leaned over to me and whispered to softly into my ear. "We need to talk."
"Yes we do!" I yelled. I looked up at Nick. It had been so long since I had seen him. And God damn I had missed him. I had missed him like...like something really big. He took a step closer to me and we looked into each other's eyes. My body was suddenly overcome by a flash of heat. I could feel all of my pores break out in sweat. I could see the corners of his eyes begin to water. If he started to cry, I would certainly cry. I prayed that he would just take me into his arms, and hold me.
"Kayci-" he choked out. "I-"
"Yes?" I asked him. I mentally begged for him to continue. I wanted him to finish with "love you" but a tear slid down his cheek and he ran out of the open front door. A.J. took one look at me and then ran after him. I could feel my shoulders drop. Jessica snapped her fingers in front of my face. "What?"
"Kayci, girl. We need to talk-"
"Why the hell did you bring him here?" Actually, I was secretly grateful to her for bringing him home, where he belongs, with me but I couldn't let her know that. Atleast not yet.
"Kayci, something is terribly wrong with Nick."
Jessica now had my full attention. There could never be anything terribly wrong with my baby, my Nick.
"Here," she said. "Sit down."
**A.J.**
"Nick!" I called after his retreating figure. But he kept running. Why did he have to be such a...such a child? "Damn it! Stop!" He finally stopped on the edge of the street and I stopped on the edge of Kayci's lawn. We had brought Nick here because he needed help and when he wouldn't confide in any of us, not even Brian, Jessie and I knew that something was wrong with him. The only person in this world that he could trust with his life, more than Brian, was Kayci. And if we could just lock them in a God damned closet, we would get somewhere! "Nick!" I called again. I could just barely make him out he was so far away. I couldn't hear what he was saying. He threw his hands up in the air and then fell against the street sign.
I ran to him.
**Nick**
"Ouch," I grumbled. Stupid street sign. I had felt a little dizzy there from all that running and now A.J. was running towards me. He ran up to me and started yelling at me. I couldn't make out a damn word he was saying...everything was just too much...So I hit him. Not very hard. It was more like a slap, just using the back of my hand. A.J. looked up at me surprised, and I cowered back, hoping he wouldn't hit me back...but knowing how A.J. is...
"Nick, jeez. What the hell?"
I looked at my feet. "A.J., I'm sorry man. You just wouldn't shut up."
"No. It's okay...well no, it's not okay that you hit me. But Nick, what the hell happened to your hand?"
I looked down and saw that the back of my hand wasn't red like it should be, it was a deep purple and completely bruised over. I shrugged. What was I going to tell A.J.? The truth? "I guess I bruise easily."
"Nobody bruises that easily! That's just not right. Nick, what the hell is going on?"
"Nothing." A.J. grabbed my upper arm, really hard and started dragging me back towards Kayci's house. It was a good thing that I was wearing a t-shirt with sleeves that would cover my upper arm because I knew as soon as A.J. took his hand away, there would be a huge bruise in the shape of his hand. But it was like A.J. was reading my thoughts. He suddenly stopped me on Kayci's lawn and reached for my shirt sleeve. Oh shit, he's going to find out.
"Nick...oh my God," he gasped.
I was screaming for help inside but it never could come out of my mouth. Deep inside I know that I need to get through this, but part of me just doesn't want to.