"What?" she said as she slowly rolled over.
"Time to wake up"
"Lance, why are you up so early?" she asked as she propped herself up on = her elbows.
"Because." he paused as she started to cough, "Sorry.we're suppose to go shopping."
"But it's still early," she complained.
"I know but JC and Chrissy will be here in two hours."
"Two hours," Christina said, "that's an hour more of sleep I could have gotten" Christina said as she finished sitting up and smiled. "Hun you're looking pale, are you sure you're up to this?"
"Yeah, I'm up to it" Lance said as he leaned in and kissed her.
It was the Monday before Thanksgiving. Eleven months had passes since he quit taking treatments. He went to the doctor monthly and had been on pain medicine for two months. With each week, after he started pain medicine, he had grown weaker but they didn't let them stop them from living.
Over the summer they had went on three trips. The first was to Indiana so that her parents could get to know him better and so that she could see her family and still be able to take care of Lance. They spent two weeks exploring Indiana, visiting her old high school and college, going to her church and seeing her family and friends. Some of her friends she hadn't seen in months or years.
Their second trip was to Mississippi to see all of Lance's family and friends. He just wanted to relax and see everyone he grew up with. After a few months without treatments and medication it was almost like he wasn't sick. His hair had slowly grown out and he had regained a little weight. He looked better and seemed alive with energy.
When they got back from Mississippi Lance told Christina that he wanted to take one more trip. He had gained most of his energy back and now seemed to be normal, except for the occasional days when he was weak. He told her they were going on a cruise for a week and that it would end in Cancun. Then they would spend a week there. JC and Justin had planed it for him while he was in Mississippi, and they were leaving in three days. As they left for the cruise Christina was still unsure of exactly what this was for. She knew he had been to Cancun before, and loved it there. It wasn't until the last night of their trip that she found out why he had planed it and took her.
"Have you enjoyed yourself?" Lance asked, as Christina sat in his arms, and they looked out over the water on the private beach he had rented for the week.
"I'm with you, of course I have" she said as she turned her head and kissed him.
The romance and passion that had disappeared because of the sickness had resurfaced. They were like a newly wed couple on their honeymoon. It seemed to those around them that they were just starting their lives together. They had been congratulated a few times, by people thinking they were just married. There had only been one day when Lance was too weak to do anything and they just spent that day lying in bed watching TV and movies. No one would have guessed that this couple would only have a few months left together if a miracle didn't occur. They had done everything newly weds do. They had been shopping, walking on the beach, taken a horse back ride, and a few days they had never left their room. It was their time to be together without worrying about being sick or doctors or anything. Both forgot about the cancer that had raged war in Lance's body and began to concentrate on the love they held for each other. Neither worried about what would happen when they went home, or about what anyone would think. They had lived six months in constant fear and worry and now it was the time for them to relax. Christina had grown to love and need him more by the end of the week then she ever did. It had become to hard to imagine life without him and every night she prayed for a miracle, but it never seemed to come. At the beginning of their trip they had agreed to spend the time doing what they wanted to. They didn't worry if it would drain him of energy because his energy had become abundant over the past month. They only worried about having fun and enjoying their time together. Christina sat in Lance's arms thinking of all these things and began to cry.
"Don't cry, Please" Lance begged.
"Okay.I'll try not to" Christina said.
"Honey, you wanna know why I wanted to take this last trip?" Lance asked, as his arms crossed across her chest and he pulled her close to him. He had been sitting against a rock and she was leaning on him for support. The opposite of their normal roles. It had become Christina that supported him for so long in all he did, and now he was her support, well atleast in this situation.
"Why?" she asked sweetly.
"I wanted to take a honeymoon with my, well with what should someday be my wife," he answered.
"Oh Lance," Christina said as the tears she had been fighting flowed out of her eyes.
"I wanted you and I to be away together and experience what it means to be happy and in love."
"I am happy and in love."
"I know but for the past two weeks we have lived like I'm not sick. We have forgot about every thing wrong with me. It never crossed either of our minds when we were in bed that I might not be here in three or four months. We just concentrated on the love we held for each other, and let the passion that we have always had over take us. This is how I want to live the rest of my life. I don't want to worry and concentrate on the bad. The good is what I want."
Christina snapped out of her thoughts as their kiss ended. She smiled and said, "I love you" as they laid back in bed together. In each other's arms they felt safe, like nothing in the world could hurt them. "So this is why you woke me up?" she teased as she snuggled into his arms and he pulled her close, "you woke me up out of a deep sleep to hold me?" she joked more. He just nodded and kissed her lips then laid his head beside hers. They laid there looking at each other and smiling, as Christina drifted back into her thought. They had spent everyday since that night on the beach together. They were never apart
Neither ever discussed the thought of him being sick, but both new the reality that could lie ahead of them. Lance had made a will and Christina knew what was suppose to happen when and if he got really sick. She knew his wishes and wants. But they never discussed them. As the months passed the number of bad days seemed to double the number of good days. He spent more time in bed not moving and less up and running around. But whenever he felt the energy he was out of the bed doing something. Since their trip in September, he had grown weak, but also kept fighting. Christina had begun to sleep more and had fought the flu a couple of times. It seemed that as Lance lost energy at times so did Christina. She had been extremely stressed and her stomach had become on big knot. She was sick about once a day and nothing seemed to settle right. But she kept moving and helping Lance as she always had. They still loved to go to the beach and for walks then out to a nice dinner. Even though he had started to be in more pain and have less energy their love and passion never faded.
Along with Christina's bouts with the flu, Lance had developed a bad cold the month before and everyone was afraid that when he entered the hospital that he wouldn't leave it. But he had made it and was now very weak. He was lucky to have more then two days when he had enough energy to leave the house. Some days it was all he could do to get out of bed and take a shower.
The guys were always there to help in anyway possible. JC and Justin took him out occasionally to give Christina short breaks or Chris and Carla would sit with them talking and laughing when he was too tired to go out. There were many movie nights and a few group dinners. Those were the things he could do that didn't zap his energy level.
Christina had been worried about his energy level the past few days, and he was worried about hers. They had spent the whole weekend lying on the couch or in bed together. Usually just sleeping or talking. Neither seemed to be feeling well but Christina would never admit she was sick. Lance had begged her to go to the doctor but she always said she was too busy and that she would get over it. He had noticed that she was sick a lot and slept more then usual but he couldn't do anything about it. He had informed Chrissy and Carla about his concerns and they promised to make her go soon. But not until after Thanksgiving. On this day they both seemed to be feeling well and happy. Christina had thought about canceling the shopping trip they were going on but now she knew they would both be okay. Every Holiday had become important to them, never letting one pass with out observance. This could be their last Thanksgiving together and they both knew it but neither would say anything about. She had worried about him all weekend, and now it seemed as though he was fine. He was coughing more then usual but atleast he was awake and being his loving self.
She smiled at him and kissed his full lips, and then closed her eyes. Christina loved to just be in his arms. It was soothing for both of them. After forty-five minutes of kissing and holding each other Christina wiggled out of his arms and stood up. She grabbed her robe and headed to the shower, followed closely by Lance. They stood kissing and holding each other as the cool water ran over them. They washed each other's backs and climbed out of the shower. By the time JC and Chrissy pulled up they were ready and fully awake. The four of them spent the next two hours shopping for food, and then dropped it off at Carla and Chris' house. They all sat around the living room talking.
Chris and Carla had finally decided to get married. But unlike Chrissy and JC they didn't wait and plan. Chris asked Carla to marry him on a Sunday and they got married the next Saturday. It was a small wedding with only their family and friends there. They had honeymooned in the Bahamas for a week and now were living in their new house. It was about ten minutes from everyone and they were happy.
Justin and Pam had finally gotten engaged but were delaying setting a date. He had just started to take some college classes and wanted to get a degree in business. But they were slowly planning the wedding and working on finding somewhere to live together.
Chrissy and JC were frantically planning their summer wedding. The date was set for June 23rd. No one had realized that it was the same day that Christina met Lance, but everyone was excited. The wedding would be in a big church in Orlando and they were planning on honeymooning in Europe.
It would be four years since Christina and Lance met when JC and Chrissy would get married. She knew that day would be hard if Lance wasn't there, but that she wouldn't say anything. Her own wedding was suppose to be in less then two weeks. But that was long forgotten. Christina never removed her engagement ring in hopes that he would get better and some day they would be together forever.
Shannon wasn't able to make it to Thanksgiving, but there was a plane ticket waiting on her for an emergency or if she ever just wanted to come in.
Sarah hadn't arrived yet, but she should have been coming the next day. Over the summer Joey and Sarah spent a lot of time together and after much convincing and pushing by their friend they decided to risk the friendship they had for a chance at love. They had developed into a loving wonderful couple that couldn't stand being apart.
Chris handed Lance a bag of mail that had arrived that day. After almost a year and a half they were still receiving gifts and letters from fans daily. Chris and Carla took care of all the email that came in and forwarded the really important ones onto the group, while JC and Chrissy sorted through the mail everyday. It was all delivered to Chris and it took about three hours each day to get through it all. Few letters were answered with more then a thank you. Their albums were still on the selves and were still being sold at incredible rates.
The group did fund raisers to raise cancer awareness and sent all the stuffed animals to a children's hospital in the area. It was a cancer hospital and Justin, Pam, and Joey volunteered there once a week to sing or help keep the children's hope up.
The guy's fans just kept sending get-well and thinking of you cards. They didn't know what to do to show them their thanks. The plans to restart touring were cancelled after Lance stopped treatments. While he still loved to sing that took to much energy out of his body. There had been talk of a thank you/ memories tour for the rest of the guys but right now that wasn't being discussed much. But it was the only way the guy's could think of to show their love for their fans.
Lance's parents were trying to help with the mail when they could. Some got forwarded on to them to deal with but most was taken care of by the group. After the last hospital stay they rented an apartment and moved to Florida temporally to be with their son. After two hours of talking and laughing Lance looked tired and they decided it was time to go. Chrissy and JC drove them home and they both quickly changed before climbing into bed together for a good night's sleep.
Lance and Christina spent most of the next two days in bed. He was wrecked with pain and drained of energy and Christina seemed to have the flu again. They always seemed to feel sick at the same time. But the guys all helped out and made sure they ate and were okay.
On Thanksgiving Day, Lance woke up at ten to an empty bed. He heard the shower going and figured that Christina had started to get ready. He had slept the past two days away and was feeling slightly better. He was still tired but he promised himself he wouldn't ruin this day for his friends. He climbed out of bed slowly and walked into the bathroom. Christina had just stepped out and they exchanged a quick kiss, before she helped him into the shower. Standing under the water he closed his eyes.
'God,' he prayed 'I know the time is near. I can feel it in my body, no energy to go on. But I ask you, beg you to please let me make it through this day. I don't want to go to the hospital on a Holiday. I know by Christmas I will be with you but not today. Please not today! Give me the strength to make it a few more days. Lord, please look out for Justin and Pam. They are good for each other and will keep each other young. Protect and guide them. Help Justin to never lose his faith in you or his musical talent. Chris and Carla.God they are such good people. Always there and willing to help. They will be great parents some day. Bless them with the children they both want so badly. Sarah and Joey, boy what one of those two don't think of the other does. Help them stay together, I know they feel like they are risking a lot to give up a friendship for the chance of a relationship. Help them to not regret it. JC and Chrissy, oh man the perfect couple if there ever was one. Help Chrissy learn to be on time and JC to learn to loosen up. Bless their lives and keep them safe always. Both need to make sure they have patience with the other. My family, Lord, they've always been there. I pray they can handle all this. I don't know what I would do if it was one of them sick. Lay your hand on them and keep them strong. Don't let them lose faith in you. I haven't lost mine in the last year and a half and I know that for some reason you have decided to take me home. I can't say I'm happy about it but I understand it is your plan, help them to see that it is all in your plans. Shannon, oh God she is my best friend. She won't be here today and I have to see her again. Lord somehow make sure she is here. I have to tell her how much she means to me and how much I admire her strength. Please Lord! Protect her, she'll be so fragile and afraid. Finally Christina.how she will handle this only you know. She'll try to be strong for everyone else but on the inside she'll be falling apart. I don't know what I would do without her, so I can only imagine how she will feel. Whatever is wrong with her, making her sick, heal her of it or atleast help her see that she needs to go to the doctor and get checked out. Help her in every way you can. God I just ask you to make this a happy, joyful day for all. Please God give me the strength that I need today. In your name as always, AMEN!'
Lance opened his eyes and finished showering. He climbed out and leaned against the cabinet in the bathroom. Christina was standing at the mirror trying to cover her pale face and looked up to see him just standing there. As Lance stood there he felt a force over come his body and energy enter him. He sighed and mumbled "Thank You." Christina unsure of what was going on walked over to him. Putting her arms around him, she laid her head on his chest. Lance smiled as he wrapped his arms around her waist. They slowly broke apart and began to dress. Christina finished first and walked out to watch TV. About ten minutes later Lance walked out and sat down beside the girl that who should be his wife. He quietly kissed her and laid a hand on her stomach. He could tell that she had been sick again that morning and his hand seemed to calm it down. They held hands and watched TV until it was time to leave.
At noon they left for Carla and Chris'. The afternoon flew by and everyone was surprise at the strength Lance showed. At five they all left for their own house. It had been a wonderful afternoon. The guys sang for the first time in months. As they sang everyone smiled and cried. It was almost as if they knew they would never sing again. Lance fell asleep on the ride home and Christina helped him into the house and helped him undress. Going to bed early, as they did many nights, Lance wrapped an arm around her waist. He rubbed her stomach gently. She had been sick all day, and had actually gotten sick right after they got home. Whatever was making her sick had started to worry Lance, but something told him it wasn't bad.
"We still decorating the condo tomorrow?" Lance asked.
"If we're up to it. I can try to do a lot of it by myself. But I would love to get your help. Hopefully I will be feeling better."
"It's a plan then," he said as he drifted into sleep. The pain medicine had finally took over his mind and body. The pain had been tremendous that day but he fought to not let anyone know. Lance didn't realize how much pain he was in as long as he was moving but as soon as he sat still for a few minutes he felt the shots of pain shooting through his body. He thanked God silently for the great day, and for the feeling that Christina would be okay before he fell asleep.
The next day Christina woke up at ten and found Lance still sleeping. They had spent the whole night in each other's arms with = Lance's hand resting on her stomach. It was the first time in months that they had both slept through the night. She slipped out quietly and showered. When she came back she found he was awake watching a cartoon on the TV.
"Hey baby!" Lance said, when he saw her.
"Hey, how you feeling?"
"Okay" he answered "how are you feeling? You were the one sick yesterday."
"Feeling good." She said as she walked over to the bed and gave him a kiss. Christina dressed then helped him into a pair of shorts and a tee shirt. They walked together to the front room. She helped him sit down and pulled a couple boxes over to the couch. They slowly went through them. Christina sat with one hand on Lance's leg and the other hold pulling things out of the box in front of them. The first thing they found was the mistletoe. Christina held it above Lance's head and they kissed. After a few extra kisses she started to slowly put the tree up.
It was completed by 2 except for the angel, which Lance sat holding in his lap. Christina looked around the room. It had been a long morning, she had put all the tree up by herself and now she was drained. But atleast their condo was half decorated. They still had four or five boxes to go through but as soon as they put the angel up they were going to lay down on the couch and take a short nap.
The tree stood where it had the year before and the boxes were almost all empty. The room was a mess but they were both so happy to have been able to do this together. They had gotten into a tinsel fight and the silver strings were all over the room now, but atleast they were happy. Christina walked over to Lance and helped him stand. Her stomach had stayed calm all day, which was unusual. They walked to the tree and stretched as they had the year before to put the angel on top. Standing in front of the tree Lance prayed that this angel would now watch over Christina and all the people he cared about. It had done such a wonderful job of watching over him and giving him the best year of his life, now he wanted it to watch over his family and friends. As Lance turned and walked away from the tree he felt the world growing dark around him. He tried to talk but couldn't. He tried to walk but his legs gave out on him. As he tumbled to the floor he heard the thump and Christina scream "LANCE!"
