Jay

"I would like to visualize for others my gratitude for the creation and marketing of Urban Decay. Urban Decay is a fabulous product, and I do not think I could live without it. Uh, could you turn the heat in here down a bit? Oh...oh, my god....my make-up's running....oh, SHIT!!!!"

"I would like to thank everyone in the porno business. Without you guys, I wouldn't be able to make it through a single day without putting someone's eye out! I would also like to thank those who helped me get to where I am today. I couldn't have made it without the help of my good friends, Ivana Fukalot and Kimona Wanahumpya!"

"I would like to thank the rest of the members of my band. Rough Cutt, I don't know what I'd do without ya! Just today I was talking to some guy, Ryan something or other, and he said 'Man, if not for Rough Cutt, your ass would be locked up in an asylum or something.' I didn't listen to him, though, 'cause he was very drunk."

"I am thankful for beer. Beer is what keeps me going. (burps) Without beer, I dunno what I'd be doin'. I might be livin' in a box somewhere. (farts) I don't know though. All I have to say is, thank Bob for Miller and Anheiser-Busch!!!"

"I am thankful for...food!!! Get outta the way, I'm starvin'!!!!"