StetsonsLastStand3.htm

By: Dix

Jamie King surveyed his bedroom with mixed regret and satisfaction. As his eyes traveled to the empty brown suitcases lying open on his bed, he heaved a deep sigh. This time, he wasn’t packing for a weekend camping trip or a week at Uncle Herman’s farm. This time he was going away for good – well, almost for good, at least. In just a few more days he would leave behind his childhood and begin to make his own way in the world. The more he thought of going away to school, his excitement and anticipation won out over any thought of potential homesickness. In college there would be no curfew, no garbage to take out, no experimental recipes of Grandma’s to pretend he liked, no sucking up to Lee to borrow his new ‘Vette – of course, there’d be no new ‘Vette, either, but a guy had to make some sacrifices, no Sheila to make him feel miserable whenever he saw her with creepy Jake Isend, no . . .

“Teddy!” Jamie shouted in frustrated annoyance. “Cut it out! I am not taking your Hot Wheels with me to college.” Jamie picked up the toy car his younger brother had deposited in an open suitcase and tossed it across the room.

“Why?” Teddy questioned, drawing out the word in a childish singsong. He scrambled across the room to fish his car out from under Jamie’s desk.

“Because you don’t take toys to college, squirt,” Jamie said as he brushed a stuffed fish and a handful of Cheerios from his dark blue comforter. “Now go away and leave me alone. I have to finish packing before Lee and Phillip get back.”

Teddy emerged from under the desk, his miniature Porsche held up triumphantly. Jamie scowled and advanced on the three year-old. He stopped when he reached the boy’s side and loomed over him, glaring menacingly. “Scram!” he growled, pointing toward the open door.

“Why?” Teddy asked plaintively. He craned his head upward, regarding his brother with a growing pout and a slight shudder.

“Just go,” Jamie ordered, bending down to look his sibling in the eye.

Teddy’s pout hardened into a tight line and his eyes began to water. With a forlorn glance at Jamie he shuffled through the door and down the hall.

“Now that was just plain mean.” Jamie heard his mother’s voice from the doorway.

“Aw, Mom,” he replied defensively. “I wasn’t being mean. He was being annoying; he’s always annoying me.” He turned to his chest of drawers as his mother came into the room and pointedly closed the door behind her.

“Teddy loves you, Jamie,” she said quietly. “He only wanted to play with you.”

“Yeah, well,” Jamie equivocated, still not meeting his mother’s gaze, “do I look like I have time to play here?” He gestured behind him to the boxes stacked by the door and the suitcases spread across the bed.

“We all need to take time to play, Jamie,” Amanda advised. “In fact, why don’t you take a break right now?” She approached her middle son, cautiously laying a hand on his arm. “I have to run down to the store, and Lee and Phillip won’t be back for another hour. You and Teddy could play with his cars, and you could give him his bath, and --”

“Just trying to get a couple more nights of free baby-sitting out of me before I go, huh?” Jamie interrupted sullenly.

“Well . . .” Amanda drew out the word as one corner of her mouth edged up in a concerned but tolerant grin, “I’m sorry if being a part of this family is such a burden to you.”

“It’s not that, Mom, it’s just . . .” Jamie faltered.

“Just what, sweetheart?” she asked.

Jamie took in a deep breath and let his words out in a rush. “It’s just that ever since you brought Teddy home he’s been nothing but trouble. He screamed non-stop for a year, he peed all over my favorite sweater, he sneaks into my room all the time . . .” He trailed off and slumped down onto a corner of his bed. “Did you ever consider that I wouldn’t want a kid brother?”

“I don’t recall you being a part of making that decision. Come to think of it, I don’t think your dad and I consulted Phillip about you, either.” Jamie quailed slightly at his mother’s warning tone.

“I’m sorry you feel this way, Jamie,” she continued more softly. “I really am, but I still need you to do your part. You know perfectly well that I can’t take Teddy into Kroger’s after what happened last month; I need you to watch him for me.”

“Yeah, Mr. Kroger himself would probably lock the doors on you,” Jamie quipped.

“You’re so funny,” Amanda teased, taking Jamie’s chin between her fingers. “Spend some time with your brother; maybe while you’re away you’ll realize that he’s not so bad after all.”

“I’ll watch him,” Jamie assented reluctantly. Amanda smiled gratefully and left.

But I don’t have to like it, he added silently.

~~~~~/\~~~~~

“Vroom, vroom,” Teddy murmured as he drove his Porsche along the edge of the bathtub. “Look out!” he shouted as he catapulted the car into the bubbly water.

“Cut it out, dude!” Jamie exclaimed as berry-scented bubbles filled the air. He flicked his fingers in Teddy’s face, sending soap-laced water droplets into the boy’s face.

“Here, Jamie, you do it!” Teddy held the tiny silver car toward him, but the combination of soap, bubble bath, and partially developed motor skills sent the toy plummeting into Jamie’s lap. As the miniature convertible turned in the air, soapy water spilled over the front of his new silk shirt.

“Now look what you did, you little turd!” he exclaimed. “This shirt is brand new! I was going to wear it out to the movies tonight; Sheila’s going to be there. You’re such a pain!” As he spoke, Jamie rose from his knees and glared down at Teddy with narrowed eyes. Seemingly of its own volition, his hand rose, gripping the toy tightly. Jamie bit down hard on his bottom lip, his body tense with suppressed sibling rage. With a mangled shout, he twisted and hurled the car through the bathroom door. It caromed off the hallway walls and bounced down the wooden stairway.

“Now that was jus’ plain mean,” Teddy piped, mimicking their mother’s tone.

“Oh, go jump in a lake!” Jamie retorted.

“Okay! Watch me!” Teddy slithered to his feet in the bathtub and jumped as high as he could – about five inches, just enough to slosh soapy water over the edge of the tub and onto Jamie’s new shoes as well as the freshly mopped floor.

“Get. Out. Of. The. Tub.” Jamie laced each word with all the menace he could manage. He reached back to pull a towel from the bar as his brother clambered out of the tub. Teddy landed with a splat on the drenched yellow mat in front of the bathtub. He eyed Jamie, a blue towel stretched taut, with apprehension.

“Mommy heps me out,” he said, pouting. “Daddy heps me out. Ph’lip hepped me out, too.” He struggled to his feet, slipping on the wet rug. “You’re not a hepper. That’s bad.”

“I’m gonna hep you right into bed, you little monster,” Jamie threatened.

“No, no, no!” Teddy chanted as he dove between Jamie’s legs and scurried out the door. “Not go bed! Get dressed. Wait for Daddy and Ph’lip.”

As Teddy ran down the hall, scattering water and suds behind him, Jamie silently beat his head against the doorframe. “What did I ever do to deserve this?” he asked. With a sigh of resignation, he removed his shirt, hanging it carefully over the towel bar, then draped the towel around his neck and headed toward Teddy’s bedroom.

“Look, Jamie!” Teddy cried, all trace of recent animosity forgotten. “I founded them! I founded them!”

Jamie entered the monster’s den to find two drawers of his dresser all but emptied, the clothes scattered across the floor. Teddy stood in the midst of the pile of discarded clothing, triumphantly holding a red knitted cap and matching mittens on a string aloft.

“I losted them a long, long time ago, but Mommy said I would finded them again when I neededed them.” Teddy’s voice began to slur with excitement at his discovery. “Ony she said I wouldn’t needed dem ‘til it was brrrr cold outside.” Teddy faked a shiver that started at his head and ended with his bottom stuck out behind him in a shuddering squat. “Is it cold outside?” He looked up at his brother with trusting anticipation.

“Of course it’s not cold outside; it’s only August, runt,” Jamie answered. He found his tolerance returning with Teddy’s childish excitement. Gripping the ends of the towel firmly, he advanced on the still dripping Teddy warily.

Teddy gleefully pulled the knit cap over his wet hair, plastering his sandy blonde bangs to his forehead in the process. He struggled with a mitten, managing only to get one hand part way in, then settled for draping the string around his neck. “Me go check outside!” he shouted as he bolted for the door.

“Teddy!” Jamie shouted in exasperation. “Come back here!”

“Me check! Me check!” Teddy chanted as he all but slid down the wooden stairs. He came to a skidding stop in the foyer, his red mittens dangling around his thighs. When the heavy front door proved too heavy for his slippery hands, he turned and careened into the kitchen, racing for the side door.

“Teddy!” Jamie roared as he pounded through the swinging kitchen door hot on the little boy’s wet heels.

Teddy paused in his attempt to open the side door as Jamie approached. “Me check! Me want to check!” he insisted. He jumped and clutched the doorknob, furiously pulling.

“Teddy, you can’t--”

Jamie’s protests were too late as Teddy slipped through the door and into the yard. Incensed, Jamie raced through the door, stopping short on the small side porch and glancing earnestly in all directions. Mrs. Parksworthy, the neighborhood snoop, was trimming the hedge that ran between their houses, but Teddy, along with his red hat and mittens, seemed to have vanished.

“Not cold, Jamie,” the boy said sadly from Jamie’s left. Left, Jamie thought, with a horrified glance at Mrs. Parksworthy, from the front yard.

“I told you so,” Jamie intoned. “Now let’s go back inside before any of the neighbors see you out here naked as a jaybird.”

“Jaybird?” Teddy queried loudly. “What jaybird? Where jaybird?”

“You are, squirt,” Jamie grated. He raked both hands through his hair in frustration, giving his glasses a good shove in the process. “Come on now,” he said more softly, shaking the towel out before him.

“No! Find jaybird!” Teddy whirled and took off across the front lawn.

“Oh, brother!” Jamie moaned, reluctantly following.

Teddy raced across the front of the house, alternating between sidewalk and grass to avoid flowers, the evening paper, and his bubble-mower. His mittens thumped against his thighs and backside, and sudsy water trickled down his face.

Jamie managed to trample his mother’s few remaining tulips, slip on the plastic coated newspaper, and trip and tumble over the blasted bubble-mower. Despite his greater size and stride, Teddy quickly pulled away from him and turned the corner to the other side of the house. As he reached the backyard, Jamie saw Teddy climb the ladder of the slide and slip down the yellow plastic incline, just as he caught his foot in between the wheels of Teddy’s tricycle.

The racing of a very familiar engine sent both brothers pelting for the front of the house again. Jamie stumbled into the driveway, still dragging the trike behind him, his eyes on Teddy, who was jumping excitedly on the front porch.

“Daddy, look!” Teddy shouted as Lee and Phillip eased out of the new Corvette. “I founded them! I founded them!” He waved his bright red, though somewhat soggy mittens over his head.

Lee exchanged an alarmed glance with Phillip.

“Is he wearin’ what I think he’s wearin’?” Phillip asked with a raised eyebrow. He tossed the keys over the roof of the car and Lee caught them absently, his gaze fixed on his very energetic, very naked son.

“If you’re thinking nothing, then I think you’re right,” Lee sighed. His voice carried that odd note of embarrassed responsibility coupled with amazed pride that had become increasingly familiar as Teddy grew and became exposed to new adventures and mishaps.

“You can explain this later,” he added to Jamie as he turned and headed toward the porch. Teddy stood in the center of the porch, wriggling his whole body in an attempt to get a mitten on his right hand.

“What’s to explain?” Jamie shouted at Lee’s back. He hurled the trike behind him and limped to Phillip’s side. “So,” he asked his brother while he watched Lee approach Teddy, “where can a guy stay when the dorms close down during semester breaks?”

“Broken or twisted, you think?” Phillip glanced pointedly at Jamie’s ankle then returned to staring at Lee’s cautious approach.

“I could join a fraternity, or get an apartment, I guess,” Jamie mused.

“You can walk on it, so it’s probably just twisted.” Phillip tensed, seeing Lee place one foot on the lowest step.

“I just think--”

“Shh!”

Lee slowly removed his sportcoat and leaned toward Teddy. Jamie shook his head and lightly pounded his fist on the hood of the car. Two robins were startled from their perch on the lowest branch of the elm near the street.

“Jaybird!” Teddy exclaimed and darted down the steps, neatly dodging his father’s lunge. His right hand was halfway encased by the bright red mitten, and the string with its mate trailed behind him like a crimson tail.

“Jaybird, Daddy, jaybird!” he shouted again, pointing to the birds, now settling on a higher branch. Teddy began to circle the tree, his head turned up, watching the birds flutter from branch to branch.

Lee motioned Phillip and Jamie into the yard and made his own way toward the elm tree.

Phillip grinned, rubbing his hands together, and moved into position.

Jamie shrugged in resignation and limped toward the tree. He stopped just under the furthest edge of the tree’s spreading foliage and watched as Lee and Phillip regarded Teddy intently. One of these days, the little monster is gonna start World War Three, he thought, glancing upward.

“Jaybird!” Teddy screeched. A small wren darted from the leaves and flew over Jamie, depositing a small white splotch on his tanned shoulder.

“That’s it!” Jamie thundered and dove to tackle the little boy. Teddy moved aside, eagerly pointing the bird out to Phillip while Jamie crashed headlong into the tree trunk.

“A little subtlety, Jamie, please,” Lee bemoaned, shaking his head. He caught Phillip’s eye once more and the two carefully herded Teddy back toward the front porch.

“Mr. Stetson!” a voice called from over the hedge. “You really shouldn’t let those boys go tearing all over the place with no clothes on. It’ll give the neighborhood a bad name.”

“Yes, Mrs. Parksworthy,” Lee replied off-handedly, his gaze not wavering from his three-foot tall prey. “I’m dealing with it, Mrs. Parksworthy.”

Jamie slumped beneath the elm tree, trying to keep his head attached to his neck and rub his bruised shoulder at the same time. He drew his hand from his shoulder finding it coated in bird droppings. In disgust, he frantically wiped his hand in the dirt and grass at his feet. He straightened his glasses with the back of his wrist and watched the spectacle he expected to play out before him. Suckers, he thought.

“One,” Phillip whispered, nodding to Lee. “Two,” he continued, moving into a football crouch. Lee brandished his gray sportcoat before him like a matador’s cape.

“Three!” they grunted in unison.

Teddy giggled as they rushed toward him. He dove into the flower bed, scrambling for cover under a large hosta.

Phillip crashed into the wall of the house, letting all his breath out with a sharp, “Oof!”

Lee dropped into a roll in the flower bed and snatched at Teddy’s trailing mitten. As he came out of the roll and rose to all fours, the automatic sprinkler began, catching him full in the face. He spluttered and winced from the needle-sharp droplets. He tugged on the mitten firmly, taking in all the slack.

“Teddy,” he addressed the hosta, “come here.” He wiped his face with the mitten he held, mixing dirt, bits of cedar mulch, and a few refreshed bubbles with the water running down his face.

“No, Daddy,” Teddy said softly. The spray from the sprinkler fell lightly over the foliage.

“No?”

The wet hosta rustled in negation.

“No isn’t an option for you, Teddy,” Lee said sternly.

“Gotcha!” Jamie exclaimed triumphantly as grabbed Teddy from the other side of the striped green plant. Teddy kicked and squealed in his brother’s arms, but Jamie gripped the boy tightly around the ribcage, though at arm’s length.

Lee sat down heavily on the mangled tulips, ruffling his wet, mulch-filled hair; Phillip leaned against the porch, picking at a tear in his pullover; Jamie dug his fingers into Teddy’s skin, and Teddy screeched and wriggled, sending bits of mulch flying. All four looked up in stunned silence as Amanda’s Explorer pulled into the driveway.

Amanda advanced on the group, her face radiating curiosity laced with trepidation. Jamie met his mother’s stare and then slowly regarded his stepfather and both of his brothers in turn. He turned his gaze down his own damp and bruised body, finally settling on Amanda once more.

With great care, Jamie moved a step closer to Lee and lowered Teddy into the sprinkler spray, rinsing off the worst of the mulch and dirt, though leaving him rather more muddy than dusty, still keeping his eyes locked on his mother’s. Teddy pulled at his red cap, drawing it down over his eyes, but he didn’t make a sound.

Very slowly, Jamie staggered across the lawn and stopped in front of Amanda. He tucked Teddy tightly under one arm and took the two plastic grocery bags that she held in his free hand. He then thrust the dirty, dripping, naked Teddy unceremoniously into their mother’s arms.

Teddy wrapped his arms around Amanda’s neck and his legs tightly about her waist. He buried his head in the crook of her shoulder, smearing grime over her blouse. “Jamie’s not a good hepper, Mommy,” he confided.

“Believe it or not,” Jamie began, “we played with his cars, and I did give him his bath, but--” he paused, taking in a deep, ragged breath. “I think you should have taken him to Kroger’s,” he finished, and promptly collapsed.

THE END

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