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When you see Mike and Austin together, you just have to smile. They are so different. Mike is tall, dark-haired, lanky and quiet. Mike wears glasses. Last time I looked, though, he was not sporting a pocket protector. He does have a heart of gold, though. Austin is short, blond-haired, outgoing, and independent. Of course, Austin is only five years old so he has an excuse for being short. Just like salt and pepper, when you find one, you expect to find the other. I feel privileged to have Salt and Pepper as my neighbors.

Our building has four apartments, two on each floor. Mike and Austin have the other apartment on the first floor. The apartments are long with a hallway that runs the full length from the living room to the dining room. Kids love this hallway, it is their runway. I take pleasure in hearing Austin come home from day care. He tears down that hallway as if he’s impatient to see everything he missed during the day. I hear him through the walls and say “Austn’s home!” I don’t see my neighbors often, but will always gravitate to my back door if I hear a child’s voice on the porch. I’m considering calling Austin my little leprechaun since he was born March 17. Maybe he’ll lead me to the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

Austin joined our neighborhood almost three years ago. When his mother died unexpectedly, his uncle, Mike, took him in. Austin’s father was in prison for crimes against Austin that are too horrible to recount. Mike became his world. It was obvious the feeling was mutual. From the very beginning of this newfound relationship, Mike decided to adopt his nephew. In March of this year, he succeeded in his quest.

Since I don’t have children of my own, I rather “adopted” Austin. Every time I got a toy in a box of cereal, or with the purchase of another product, I put it aside for him. At Christmas, I would buy him some coloring books and crayons. They were always little things, but to Austin, they meant something. Now, though, when he sees me he wants to know if I have any presents for him. I think we need to break the cycle just a bit.

Mike got sick a few months back. When his car didn’t move for several days, I finally knocked on his door to see what was going on. After several weeks of illness, he was diagnosed with mono. Since he was very weak, Austin was spending some time with other family members out of town. He and Mike spoke daily on the telephone; but it was the first time they had been apart in two years. It was hard on both of them. Such is the trial of single parenting. Fortunately, Austin seems to be quite hardy. Aside from the scar that was a souvenir from his father, he’s quite a healthy little boy.

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Single parenting has to be a hardship under normal circumstances. It is becoming more and more common as well. People are even choosing to become single parents. This brings up issues dealing with daycare while the parent is at work, babysitting for social engagements, and healthcare considerations to name a few. The complication of children in the single’s market is no picnic. Many individuals simply don’t want ready-made families. The family is being re-defined.

The state of single parenting often is unexpected. The parents divorce, a parent dies, or an unplanned pregnancy complicates issues. There are many reasons for the rise in single parenting. Today, I’d like to tell you the story of a single parent. Many of us have god parents and we don’t think much about them. We pray that our own parents will live long and healthy lives and that we won’t need our god parents.

My neighbor, Mike was made god father to his nephew, Austin. When his sister died unexpectedly, Austin came to live with him. Austin’s father was not available and would not be a suitable father. Mike found himself with all the responsibilities of a single parent overnight. Most times, there is something of a conversion from a two-parent family to a one-parent family. Or, there is a pregnancy that hones in on the fact that things are going to change. In this case, Mike had an instant child. He didn’t have the pregnancy and birth to prepare him. Seven days a week, twenty-four hours a day, Mike had a child in his care.