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EmeraldAngel's
Survivors' Support Page
This page is dedicated to the memory of my husband~
a sweet, sweet man, a troubled soul and an alcoholic.
Joe committed suicide in 1998

(poems/songs and insights on this page are my work(unless otherwise stated)
My work: copyright, 1999
The following are some web pages which have been created by survivors...
survivors of family and  friends' suicides, and 
survivors of loved ones with addictions and of abuse
 
 If you find such a page, or you have created one yourself, please let me know so I can add it to this page.
Suicide Stories       Abuse Stories      Addiction Stories
EmeraldAngel's Home Page    email:msdebbiep@yahoo.com
  

 


 

I think the best support I can give to a survivor of a suicide is located in Joe's Poems.
(poems/song is copyrighted 1998) 
(The one is written here.. it is a song actually... and the other is a link in the suicide stories.)

It will eat us up if we focus on the "why" and the "if  only". 

What got me through was understanding that he suffered a personal torment that we can never possible understand and now he found his peace.

 

The Eyes
I look into the eyes of the picture on the wall
and I see joy
...makes me wonder why.
I look into the eyes of the picture on the wall
and I see love
...makes me wonder why.
I look into the eyes of the picture on the wall
and I see pain
...and I know why.

I know why you left me,
why you left this world behind;
Life was too cruel,
to you it was not kind.
The struggles were too great,
too hard and too much pain,
but then you found your peace,
and you I do not blame.

but when I look into the eyes of the picture on the wall
I know you're gone
you are no more.
When I look into the eyes of the picture on the wall
my eyes cry,
my heart cries...
when I look into your eyes...
 

 
 
 
Suicide Stories 
Joe's Poem I wrote this poem following Joe's death.  
Writing the words helped the healing process. 
Joe's Story.... or is it mine? the good, the bad and the ugly  
(a rough draft of our life story)  
Bill's Story A mother's story 
Time to Learn A song from a friend by Tim O'Brien and Patrick Alger  
 
 
 
 

 
Suicide Stories  Abuse Stories  Addiction Stories
 
 
 
 

I'm not sure what to say here..strength comes from talking about the situaion... 
use a journal, poetry, songs... talk to friends, counsellors, teachers.

Some how one must come to terms with what has happened.
An abuser is meeting their own needs, dealing with their own demons, fears, conflicts.
An abusee is the vent for the inner turmoil of the abuser... 
somehow, accept the past, it is part of who you are...it has made you stronger
(believe it or not).

What can you learn from it.. make it a positive thing in your life.... you have endured it !!
YOU ARE A SURVIVOR..be proud of yourself!
You could not control the moment of the abuse, but you can control your future.
Don't let the abuser rob your future from you.
I know you can make it.. the future is yours!
 
 

Abuse Stories 
 Suzanne's Page Poems from the soul of a brave little girl 
Life after Rape and Other Stories of Abuse 

Suicide Stories  Abuse Stories  Addiction Stories

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

My husband was an alcoholic...it controlled his life.  He fought hard to conquer it, and it seemed he had on two occasions.  I stood by his side (I tried my best, anyway) waiting for the day when he could stay sober... knowing that it would be heaven.  We had heaven for a full year the last time he went to Rehab. 
But then he thought he could have that "one beer" -- and the rest is history.  10 months later he had committed suicide. 

I started writing a poem once, and I recently found it.  It is not finished, but I think it is still effective.
I'd like to share it with you... perhaps you can put your own finishing touches on it.

 

The Cycle
With the bottle he hid his fears 
Into the bottle he cried his tears 
With the bottle he tried to hide 
Unto himself he did  lie 
He said it gave him times of peace 
But the thoughts, did they cease? 
From the bottle, times did come 
When his troubled feelings were far from numb 
Out poured the pain, from the present, the past 
The moments of peace did not last 
So with the bottle the pain it grew 
And disappeared the man we knew

 
 
Addiction Stories 
Onetenderheart's Story The story of a special lady 
Angel Lady's Page A link to more stories

Suicide Stories   Abuse Stories  Addiction Stories
  
 
 
 The Hand is Cold

(A song shared with me by a friend.
I am not sure who to give credit to, but the singer is
"Tim O'Brien")

The Hand Is Cold

The hand is cold
That once held mine
I can't believe
You've really left this world behind
I can't wait
And I can't hope
I'll get over this in time.

It takes time to learn
When someone's gone for good
That you're not coming back
Like you wish they would
In the empty hours
When you miss them so
Then it's time to learn
To let them go

Your last hours
We never knew
We never had a chance
To say goodbye to you
Words unsaid and things undone
We'd just begun and now
We'll never see them through

It takes time to learn
When someone's gone for good
They're not coming back
Like you wish they would
In the empty hours
When you miss them so
It takes time to learn
To let them go

It takes time to learn
That you're gone for good
You're not coming back
Like I wish you would
In the empty hours
When I miss you so
Then it's time to learn
To let you go

The hand is cold
That once held mine.

Suicide Stories   Abuse Stories  Addiction Stories